Im in court for going AWOL from army. trips decides what I say to Judge

im in court for going AWOL from army. trips decides what I say to Judge.

My ISIS contact told me to escape infidel militia.

I'm sorry mister judgey wudgey but I could no longer be okay with supporting the capitalistic war machine that murders families for oil

I was just sick of all the niggers in my company

"Your honor, my erection tells me that we should settle this down in the bathroom"

i have autism sir
i didnt know what i was doing

I had to get home to watch Master Chef. There's no reception in the barracks.

rol

roll

my true home is Sup Forums
praise kek and fuck niggers, sir

BUSH DID 911

>actuall offended libtard
reroll.

roll

how original.

"I left to go suck on Andy Six's creamy logs. Wouldn't you do the same Judge?"

I couldn't take all the late night orgies in the bunks your honor! I felt violate and abused, I tried to like it but I just couldn't take it!

This

Tell him your gender identity made you do it.

yes

Rub a dub dub, thanks for the grub

I was jerking my tink cock to Loli guro snuff porn and counldn't be bother to serve in the Israeli foreign legion which you may know as the US military. This country has been going in the wrong direction for about 100 years. The federal reserve should be disbanded. We should either just take the fucking oil out of the middle east for ourselves or leave the jews and muslims to fucking nuke one another. However, I digress from the issue before us today. Which is fuck you and fuck the army, I should have joined the marines like a real man.

scru u infidel

Ask to take the maximum punishment possible. Say you deserve it and it will be your way of saying sorry.

rolling

so close

Reroll

Or the voices in your head

rolling

How would OP prove that he delivered?

Is that Colonel Sanders? ¦^]

say the navy seal copypasta

Hitler did nothing wrong.

I'm a military-dodger who tries to act tough but is actually a pussy, just like our president. This is a witch hunt. Praise Putin.

Kek I'll Rollerino for dis

re roll

If he is white, ask why a white supremacist is deciding what should happen to you. If he is black, ask why a nigger is.

rolling this

Shareblue plz. We are trying to have a bit of a laugh. Now fuck off.

yes

MISTER Judge Sir, while my company was out drinking i studied the blade, while they where out whoring i practiced the blade. Now that i am a master with the BLADE i can no longer stay with them and have to seek true glory in the battlefield alone

kek yes fuck you op

Tell him you had to go AWOL, because the glowing CIA niggers were going to get you if you didn't.

This

Roll

I got my dick stuck in a crack.

I thought I was auditioning for a gay porno, not the actual army

scream about how everyone in the court is a normie and scream aloha snackbar before dropping to the floor and spinning in circles while drooling

GAS THE KIKES
RACE WAR
NOW

roll

this

re roll

Start off by asking him how is day was, and then interrupt him and say, "no one actually gives a fuck." Proceed to flip him off and try to leave. Once apprehended, state that the glowing CIA niggers told you to do it.

I was bayoneting nigglets and lost track of time.

''Sorry sometimes I think about fucking horses and forget what happens around me''

Hitler did nothing wrong, so I shall now try to do the same!

reroll

I wish Hitler would have won the war

roll

Mr judge, do you want to suck my huge pulsating cock?

y e s

Roll

this but you gotta start screaming as loud as possible when the guards touch you

Say nothing. Just take down your pants and shit and piss everywhere. Bonus if you can throw your shit at the judge.

This

Scream fag over and over

Hitler did nothing wrong

No further statements, your honor.

fukk u fam i don't need u normie f-f-f-FAGGOTS tellin me when i can't leave to diddle the kiddles with my pickle

Nigga fuck the POlice, and BITCH fuck you too! (then shit yourself on the spot)

Thiss

My gaping asshole is lusting for nigger dick

yes

Say you hate faggots

They call me beepis boy

"Niggers lick my anus"

Ask him if he is a jew, before he can answer, say that you don't want a dirty penny-snatching kike ruling over your case.

thiss

reroll

Allahu Akbar!

so closee

Recite Chaplin's speech at the end of The Great Dictator, then flip him off

Just whip out your cock and jerk as hard as you can. Maintain eye contact with the judge.

reroll

keep asking "is the army an institution?" and get increasingly frustrated with every and any answer

My sides

roll

rollerino

...

...

Army Infantry vet here. Filth like you should have just shot yourself in basic like the other weak faggots. You swear that oath voluntarily, nobody gets conscripted anymore.

The fact that you may have gone into battle with my brothers makes me sick to my stomach, because you would have abandoned men who counted on you to have their backs when shit got real.

Why the fuck did you even take the oath?

rolling for this

"AWOL? More like Ayyy, fuck you!"

Just say BUILD THAT WALL! over and over

Roll for this

Reroll for winrar

rollerino

Scream
>HNNNNNNNNNNG!
>AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOIIAAAAAAAAH
>AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGHH
>WEEEEEEEEEEEEERR
Then just pretend nothing happened and act normal

This

Yes, Reroll dis

Rolling