/nzg/ - The New Zealand General

/nzg/ - The New Zealand General

Why are IDs even gone?

...

What time is it in nz?

new zealand lol

fucking wasteland

chch reporting in.

Your country is shit and so are you.

anyone here had hemoroids / piles before? fucking agony man my ass is raw

Dunedin reporting.

Fucking Shortland Street got me crying and I don't ever cry for a TV Show or Movie.

9:04pm

yeah ive had my actual asshole sliced into to remove the clots.

>nice digits man.

there ain't nothing you can do unless you go get cream or whatever from the dr/pharmacy. just gotta let it heal itself

like surgery? my ass hasnt stopped bleeding since yesterday but im too embarrassed to go to see a doctor

sorry forgot to acknowledge your wonderful digits my man

literally not going to rub cream up my ass. will just let it heal then

Checked, sweet quads.

Also my mrs got them bad when she was up the duff. I can ask her if you like

pictures of it didn't happen.

>capital city voted top place to live in the world
>one of the highest promiscuity rates of a country
>one of the highest binge drinking countries
>ranked one of the top "free/freedom" counrties
>we legitimately look like the LOTR sets that shit wasn't cgi

try harder faggot and shuffle back to whatever economic shit hole you hail from, cunt

my GP did it right then in there in her office.
no reason to be embarrassed, hemmoroids are a pretty ordinary thing for them.

sup lads auckfag here, sesh and whittakers peanutbutter chocolate, dont go back to work till sat. what's going on?

pls do :(

harden up faggot its not like you gotta jam your finger right up your ass

Its official, this is /nzg/ hemorrhoid edition

So say the digits

...

eat more fibre and drink more water faggot

Shortland street was fucking intense.

Go and buy a packet of womens maternity pads from the supermarket and wear those. It will cushion your inflamed undercarriage, and help you heal.

The dr gave her some suppositories that worked wonders too

stupid fucking show so you must be a stupid fucking hoe.

< australian soldier m18 claymore helmet

ohh sorry is new zealand
australia have the same flag

what happened thou

i know right the fuck? best episode i've seen since i started watching like 15 years ago!

>Go and buy a packet of womens maternity pads

Uhh.. a lot happened.

How recently have you seen it, if at all?

Last time I saw it there was a fire?

Fill me in

>a fire
Be more descriptive.. was it at a batch at the end of the year?

I really dont know. I think the hospital was on fire and someone died

What year, roughly?

well faggots, chch reporting. it finally fucking happened. Sup Forums has done me me. ive booked an appointment to fuck get fucked by a trap on Sunday night. how fucked am i

and by trap i mean thai shemale 32C tits

You're not very fucked right now but you will be on Sunday. Also you're going to get AIDS

Probably 13-14 off the top of my head

Dunners reporting.

Kicking back with some stout jams, reckon I'll get a cup of tea in the mix at some point. How's your evening going?

obviously going to use condoms idiot

post pics of said trap, how did you hook up, how much is it costing

The thing Ive found in life is that you learn more from your failures than you do from your successes.

Youre about to learn a whole lot, and learn to regret a whole lot too

$60 / hour. backpage ad
why regret

She's obviously going to slip it off and cum in your bum

Oh, that's a fair while ago then. a lot has changed.

>Chris Warner has cancer
>Rachel has fucked off to USA after her alcoholism came back thanks to Lucy's father Glen who Rachel knew from years back

honestly there's so much thats happened since then, but if you wanted to start watching again the 25th Birthday Episode from tonight would be a good one to watch. I'd even answer any questions you'd have.

anonnz?
Ginga?
Obviously Dunners

Hutt Valley checking in

My electric blanket fucked out last winter so I've taken to filling empty liquor bottles (Jim Beam 1.75L are the best) with hot water to use as makeshift hot water bottles. They fucking work too.

>anonnz?
you know me too well ;)

Lol I bet it's like 6 foot 2 and towers over you. When you see it face to face you'll be like "yep, that's a dude in a dress" and before you know it you've handed over your cash, your ass is sore, you feel disgusted with yourself and you're slightly poorer.

I didn't know we were guessing, but I reckon you're spot on. Who's this, Uke?

come on tinychat

p good, would probably smash tbh, good thing its asian, cant imagine a kiwi shemale ever passing
>azn
>tall
i find this hard to believe

>thai ladyboy
>6 foot 2
pick one.
youve obviosuly never seen one in real life theyre often hotter than real girls

Sorer, poorer, but wiser.

Theres nothing we can say to stop this trainwreck. Lets just hope he reports back when he has been done

Of course it's me. I am only guessing because I am bored as fuck and also depressed.

yeah doode

i will green text the whole experience on Monday.
>inb4 enjoy your AIDS / hemorroids

any people in auckland who have a vagina want to come and cuddle and drink wine and watch brooklyn nine nine with me?

i need that vid of you deepthroating her dick then plowing her anus without lube

take pics, post oc

Well you're three for three, so cheer up

Youre talking the new season on netflix?

That makes life worth living again.
Yeah new season, not on netflix though because I don't pay for shit I can get for free.

i'lm planning on taking pics /vidoes anyway

they are literally $10 from the warehouse you sad cunt

Gwent is in open beta btw

Chicks dig guys who get knockoff stuff for free, instead of guys who spend $10 to get the real thing. Good luck trying to get vagina and cuddles

They do, because then that's an extra $10 I can spend on their ass.

Get A gf
Warm.butts but cold feet

Empty bottles are free you avo on toast eating rich faggot

...

wtb warm lady butt. Cold feet can be rectified with socks.

This fat chick from my old work has been dropping hints but she wants relationship. I just want to fuck every now and again

S L O T H G U Y

fuck you i dont even like avos

heyyy!

>that insulation tape
kek

How's it going, maaate? What's new?

not much, living in wellington now, which cuts down on the commute

I don't even remember where you were living tbh. It's been a long time. How's Welly?
>select all images with cars

And? You don't have to move in with her

Man, you males have to make everything so difficult.

>tfw no gf
>tfw no friends
>tfw

There's nothing more simple than a man. We want 3 things.
Food
Bantz
Penis touching.

/b didn't do shit, you were always a faggot.

great, I used to live out in wairarapa

But it can't be on Tuesdays.
Or with a girl friend.
Only mum makes the best lasagne.
Should probably get a haircut.
Ya like fat chicks but no fatter than 20kg and vomiting.
Mental illness is a total bonus.
But she has to drive.

that shit is going to break and you will die in your sleep.

What the fuck kind of faggoty men do you date?

Oh and ya girl gotta be funny.. but not too funny cause she might bruise your pride by out memeing you.

I swipe left on any tinder bitch that has good a banter or some variation in her bio.
bitch you ain't about that life.

Sounds vaguely familiar, now you've mentioned it. What's in Welly for you, anyway? Do you work there or something?

See, scared of being out memed

Most of the men aren't avid hikers, artists, snowboarders, gymthusiasts or even like dogs all that much either but I deal.

You're dating the wrong men, lady. You should date me, unless you weigh more than 20kg and can't make a good lasagne.

Yeah work is in wellington, saves having to work remote and missing out on team related convos

banter and memes are not the same thing.
no one is capable of keeping up with my meme lord.
girl banter is fucking stupid and you can't even crack a dead baby joke around them.
silly liars get swiper left.