Hey Im a 20 year old guy and ive been suffering from what i believe is depression for around 2 years.
It started off as lack of confidence which led to me not being able to stay at a job.
ive had a bit of suicidal thoughts but it escelated around 3 months ago. Now i cant go a day without wanting to bash my head in and ive planned it but obviously didnt go through with it. The reason I feel this way is because ive done some horrible stuff pornography and omegle wise. Ive watched younger people and been involved on omegle with younger people. I have not downloading anything for the last year (illegal that is) and i havnt been involved with young people on omegle for 2 months. Do you think I deserve to live? Of course i wanna live, i really do, but im not sure if im able to live with myself after the things ive done.
Hey Im a 20 year old guy and ive been suffering from what i believe is depression for around 2 years
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Ive been watching porn and masturbating for the alst 10 years around 1-3 times a day. And the last 2 years ive done it anywhere from 1-6 times a day. My cock has been swollen countless times and ive had bruises on it several times too. Do you think i deserve to live or should i end it?
How young were they?
Omegle - between 12-14 a couple times. The majority were not that young but that doesnt matter .
Kik etc - one blowjob 14 years old.
If you weren't a pedophile I wouldn't have to tell you to end your miserable exsistance!
i think you should stop watching porn and masturbate
go outside for a walk
Kys pedo fag
You are probably right.
The biggest issue I have is if I deserve to live having done these things. Since what Ive done is disgusting to say the least, do I not deserve some sort of punishment? Why should I be able to live a good life having done these things?
If you want me to end it, then it would be better motivated if you actually told me why, bigger chance i do it then
Just end it, filthy piece of human trash
Stop it, faggot.
Neither I or any other functioning human is going to give you the sympathy you think you deserve. What you deserve is death and a slow one at that. If you don't kill yourself I want you to know that I'll be praying for a car to crash through your house and leave you stuck to a wall with hours to live before your stomach and other organs can no longer function because of blood loss.
serious answer here:
work out
how much of a risk do you think you pose to children
but i have to say, 12-14 years olds, man... fucks sake. Why?
Same faggot.
Meh, that's not so bad. They were pubescent at least. Chalk it up to adolescent hormones and move on with your life.
Being this much of a samefag pedo sympathizer. You're probably just like him.
If you think you deserve some sort of punishment then either turn yourself in to the police or pick a painful and slow way to die. Not just pussy the fuck out because "m-muh, living with the guilt is the worst punishment I could feel"
You don't need our fucking sympathy! How dare you even ask for a reason you are litterally watch 12-14 year old kids do sexual acts and admit to downloading such. I don't care if it's been a year since you downloaded what ever! I hope you kill yourself lol
In real life? 0. But im obviously biased. I really believe i would never do it.
Porn. No chance either.
Of course me living is not the worst punishment. death is, thats why ive come here to get someone elses perspective.
Im not going to turn myself in. I either live my life or kill myself.
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Implying theyre not going to try and get you on a watchlist if Sup Forums really turns stuff over to the authorities like they apparently do
Get therapy. I was molested because the guy didn't. He's in prison and they just charged him again. I check inmate services damn near daily to make sure he is still in. I'm 9 different colors of fucked in the head as an adult.
The difference?
You were on the internet. He was a trusted family friend in my bedroom. You haven't crossed that line and ruined someones fucking life yet. So, you have that going for you.
>>Wah wah. Tell me to kill myself. The lights on the box on my desk looked like young people and now I want B to decide my fate like some foul mouthed suicide dominatrix.
Carry your own cross, faggot.
I know it doesnt matter. Ive done it i cant change it. Im sorry that it sounds like i want sympathy. thats not what i want.
If you are attracted to children, you need to quietly seek help. We don't ask to have fetishes, we just have them. Being attracted to children however, makes you a danger to society. If you simply engaged them at their own free will on a chat, I would not think that you've affected their lives that much.
This. My ex was molested at 7 years old by a family friend (or relative, she refused to tell me. Just told me that he had an involvement in her life) and he probably started out a bit like OP here, thinking he wouldn't hurt anyone.
Needless to say, ex was fucked up pretty bad. Can't count the mental illnesses she probably has on one hand (she never did tell the authorities - said it would ruin her life if her family found out)
I agree.
Yes, my post is silly i realize that as i read through it.
Im at most attracted to 14-16.
Hey there faggot. There is a lot of new reaserch that good probiotics and prebiotics help alot with depression. You have to know that what you think is mosty dictated by feelings and if you didn't have depression you could be in exact same spot and just didn't care. You can try something like swanson epic pro. It should help you, but not immediately. Then you can try sports and therapy. It Will be ok.
I agree. I hate pedos but there is a difference between a chat site widely known to be used by predators... and, say, someone stalking someone IRL.
Still bad, and user's just as much a danger, but I see where you're coming from. They're clearly not as naive as they make out, unfortunately
Im sorry to hear that.
>>Wahh guys, tell me to kill mahself.
>>Waaah, remember guys, the rules of this stupid game I made up was I either kill mahself or don't. Follow the rules of mah game waaaaaahhhh....
>>>Waaaaah isn't a crying sound. Just say it in your normal reading voice and you will have an approximation of how fucking stupid you sound right now.
Yeah, I noticed when the other guy pointed it out. Thanks
Legend
>Since what Ive done is disgusting to say the least, do I not deserve some sort of punishment?
disgusting, yeah. sounds like your mind is punishing you tho.
>Why should I be able to live a good life having done these things?
you cannot change the past, only the future
live a good life, but make sure other people also live good lives. volunteer, donate money, juts help people and you will probably feel less shitty about what you have done
God, dude. I hope my girlfriend isn't hiding something like this from me. As much as it probably devastates her to have memories of it. It would kill me to know I can't do anything about it because it already happened. If she didn't tell me who it was it'd keep me up thinking and if I ever did find out id kill them. I swear I'd use the extra time off work I've been collecting to hunt that piece of subhuman garbage. I'd mark the day he was released on my calendar if he's in jail and I'd do to him what the government is to pussy to do with the PC movement down their urethras.
Ill look into therapists in my area.
I get what youre saying.
>14-16
oh, so you're a completely normal heterosexual male. still, kys yourself
Fuck off, snake oil salesman kike.
>>>BRUH, JUST EAT SOME BACTERIA AND YOULL STOP BEING PEDO.
Doctors are the people that have real medicine. Some of it fucking sucks and they are blood suckers just like this yogurt selling jew, but brain chemistry is complicated and bacteria won't help.
It's true watches at $ 0?
Ill think abit more about it.
Yes, its true.
I know. Thing is, her family didn't like me that much and they moved to her town from somewhere else, after she was 7. So no way of knowing. Some people here probably thinks she was lying but I don't think she's told anyone else, and she refused to go into detail with it.
Her words - 'You can't expect me to be okay with talking about it' before never speaking about it voluntarily again.
But yeah, she's hated me for a while now because of something unrelated, hence the ex part.
>>>Child molestation is a political issue all of a sudden.
>>>>Because some asshole wanted it to be.
Fucking Republicans would probably flip their lids if they knew that I was blowing loads in my own cowboy boots.
Could probably bring my aunt back from the dead if it wasn't for those fucking communists.
Don't kill yourself just repent and do good with your life. It sounds like you really regret what you did, if that's true then you can make yourself better. Usually I'd say try to do twice the good for the world that you had done as evil but you sound pretty beat up over it so I'd say 3 or 4 times just to be safe
Hey.
This guy here.
>>>Pic related.
>>>>Imagine someone important to you is saying this and meaning it: "Thank you.".
>>>Honestly though? You're probably okay. Teenagers fap their faces off and if they weren't doing it with you, it prooooooobably would have been someone else. Better safe than sorry though if big floppy tits and fertile hips stopped doing it for you.
1)Seek help
2)Work out (lift weights)
3)Meditate
>>>>Or...Hard adult dick and supple man bottom. If that's your thing.
Your future is all that matters. Don't let the past pull you down.
I will work on being a better person.
My gf is a top microbiologist. If you would ever read real papers or you were anything other then a lazy nig nog you would check yourself. It doesnt have to be shit i told him. Its just what I take. If he wants to he can learn himself but I dont recommend Internet. Go to university. You have no idea how much of your health you owe all these little fuckers. Its that its so new reaserch that almost nobody talks about yet. From top of my head one strain that i know of (reuteri) was extensivly tested for depression and atopic dermatitis. Its a new field and he wont hurt himself.
Also antidepressants almost never work, that why i said he should seek therapy. You would know that if you were in the subject. Read The Depths: The Evolutionary Origins of the Depression Epidemic for starters
Go outside and hang out with people. That'll make you happy and not feel so alone. And yeah, most people have done sexual things that they're embarrassed, regret, or feel guilty about. Eventually, it won't be such a big deal, you'll just say to yourself "meh it's just some whacky shit I did when I was young," but if it's a big or persistent problem, go see a counselor about it. Especially one that specializes in sex-related mental health issues.
im never going to think that its just some whacky thing. Many children get taken advantage off and I dont think trying to downplay what ive done is going to help anyone. Its not a small thing.
But i do appriciate your words.
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I was mainly talking about your other porn thing. I assume you meant gay or trap porn, etc? It's shit like that that you eventually realize is not a big deal. You either realize that you're into it and that's who you are, or you were just experimenting and decided that it's not for you. Either way, you're cool with it.
Not really sure what to say about your other situation, as you are absolutely right. But remember, even at 20 you are still young and stupid, everyone is. Let alone before.
Im glad to hear.
Thanks again.