I played my guitar today.
I learned some jazz chord progressions to mess around with, learned a little more about theory, and improvised a bit while doing this.
I got distracted at some point, and tried some new things with an old jazz piece of mine, ended up making a new chord progression, improvised a few melodies within that, as well.
I enforced my knowledge of the f major scale in standard tuning some more, and improvised while doing that, as well; I also decided to improvise to some backing tracks with the f major scale.
While tuning my guitar, I focused more than usual, so I focused like I used to, getting a pretty damn good and accurate tuning by ear, but it's obvious to me that I have to try a lot harder to focus and get a good tuning than I used to.
I don't play nearly as much as I used to, so I'm pretty rusty; I'm still damn good, but I'm not as good anymore.
My improvisational skills may have improved, though, despite the relative lack of practice; curious.
I used to love playing the guitar, I could do it for hours.
Dare I say, it used to make me happy.
How, it just distracts me from the pain, but the pain always comes back.
If I enjoyed it earlier, it was little, it was more like it just distracted me from the pain.
My pain is in my feels.
I also improvised some blues, it was funky as hell, maybe even fun, for the little while, and right after, I just felt the pain again.