I know, that shit hurts man. I was so in love with my first GF and when she cheated on my it just tore me up. Same thing, I thought she was perfect, wanted to marry her and all that. She slept with some dude who had the shop where she took her car to get fixed. I punched out her windows and wanted to destroy that guy but he had his burly buddy there and I wasn't very big anyways.
What's weird is after a while, you stop creating the pain... it's a mind fuck, hope I'm making sense, but something in you mind is not connecting the dots... maybe it's cognitive dissonance or something. Like you want to hold on to the fantasy because it felt so right, but you know the reality doesn't match so your head goes in circles. At least song lyrics will make more sense to you now, and ultimately it is part of growing up.
Best thing to do is confront the reality, face it... it'll sting but then you can pick yourself up and move one. Focus on improving your quality of life, expand your knowledge, learn a trade, develop some skills... work out. Tons of shit to do.
Sorry, it's a bitter red pill.
Ironically, now that there is a girl that wants me to love her so bad and I'm not even capable of it anymore- after going what you are going through so many times. I used to tell myself well, not not all women... but I don't know, still hopefull but really out of fucks. I used to combine sex with love, thinking that was the ultimate... not so much anymore.
Titty bar though bro, boobies in your face... you'll be like who was I trippin' on?
And honestly if you go to one during the day, chances are you'll find a cool stripper that will talk to you and probably give you some good advice. They get a bad rap, but those girls have helped me through some shit in the past, also sometimes you just need physical contact. I only go rarely, when it's 10 a dance and 3 or 1 for a beer, drink stella's and look at tits and ass