Sell me this pen Sup Forums

sell me this pen Sup Forums

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It kills niggers if you stab them in the eye.

...

>you can write with it
>implying you can write
>implying

It's made of plastic, you can write with it. I don't wanna do this

Sure. That'll be 1 dollar please.

vocaroo.com/i/s0WR6rztHM5m

You sound hot

Crisp, desicive not op, but i want the pen now.

Sure, I'll just need a signature...

...oh, do you need a pen?

Excuse me user could you sign for this?

Oh you have no pen

£1000 k thanks.

D:

Beat me to I faggot

vocaroo.com/i/s17mLjBtCRe5

This pen is part of the patriarchy, would not buy.

Its better than a pencil as it requires less maintenance

Mate, give me that pen.

buy this pen or ill fucking stab you

This pen's ink is made from rare extracted dinosaur blood.

It was last sold at an auction for $483 Million USD.

Ill sell it to you at a bargain price, $1.25.

femanon here. I'll put it in my ass if you buy it.

vocaroo.com/i/s1cZ5om4HdRx

You can pretend it is a space ship. Or put it in your pooper

Erection achieved.

It's your pen... you fucking sell it to me.

A little old lady only used it to sign the Gettysburg address

vocaroo.com/i/s15hq6hYXNmM

Can be used to communicate, used as a weapon, used for sex, used as a utensil, and used to open shit.

You know the rules- tits/timestamped or gtfo.

install my ransomware
buy 1 pen to unlock your files

DAMN.

I can paint faces with an erection

best way to sell a pen; hands down

Milo used it to sign the Declaration of Independence

nothx I brought my own

vocaroo.com/i/s1Z20J3S7ctb

B T F O

Do you need to write something?

What do you currently use to write?

What do you like about it?

What do you not like about it?

This pen doesn't do the things you don't like and does what you like (but better) and also does else.

how will he ever recover?

Just when I thought there could be no proper response...

>Do you need to write something?
>no

BOOOOOOOOOOOM

Game over. Thanks for playing.

it was used on the space station to kill a virus

Step right up
Everyone's a winner, bargains galore
That's right, you too can be the proud owner
Of the quality goes in before the name goes on
One-tenth of a dollar, one-tenth of a dollar, we got service after sales
You need pens? we got pens, how 'bout an engagement pen?
Something for the little lady, something for the little lady,
Something for the little lady
Three for a dollar
We got a year-end clearance, we got a white sale
And a smoke-damaged pen, you can drive it away today
Act now, act now, and receive as our gift, our gift to you
They come in all colors, one size fits all
No muss, no fuss, no spills, you're tired of kitchen drudgery
Everything must go, going out of business,
Going out of business sale
Fifty percent off original retail price, skip the middle man
Don't settle for less
How do we do it? how do we do it? volume, volume, turn up the volume
Now you've heard it advertised, don't hesitate
Don't be caught with your drawers down,
That's right, it filets, it chops, it dices, slices,
Never stops, lasts a lifetime, mows your lawn
And it mows your lawn and it picks up the kids from school
It gets rid of unwanted facial hair, it gets rid of embarrassing age spots,
It delivers a pizza, and it lengthens, and it strengthens
And it finds that slipper that's been at large
under the chaise lounge for several weeks
And it plays a mean Rhythm Master,
It makes excuses for unwanted lipstick on your collar
And it's only a dollar
'Cause it forges your signature
If not completely satisfied, mail back unused portion of product
For complete refund of price of purchase
Step right up
Please allow thirty days for delivery, don't be fooled by cheap imitations
You can live in it, live in it, laugh in it, love in it
Swim in it, sleep in it,
Live in it, swim in it, laugh in it, love in it
Removes embarrassing stains from contour sheets, that's right
And it entertains visiting relatives, it turns a sandwich into a banquet

This is not just any pen, it's THE pen!
How could you not have this pen by now?

Thousands years of evolution, and you STILL use primitive technology, the so-called "pencil"? SINCE WHEN ARE YOU A FAGGOT? I guess the only use you have for a pen is to shove it up your ass.

What? Are you afraid that you're gonna miswrite something? DON'T BE, INSTEAD, MAN UP AND KEEP ON WRITING

With this pen, you can write so much on a paper, the paper will get heavier.
You can write so much on the moon, enough to make a SECOND dark side of the moon.

DON'T WAIT NO MORE! MAKE THIS PEN YOURS!
(only 0,99$)

Tired of being the life of the party?
Change your shorts, change your life, change your life

We'll give you the business
Get on the business end of our going-out-of-business sale
Receive our free brochure, free brochure
Read the easy-to-follow assembly instructions, batteries not included
Send before midnight tomorrow, terms available,
Step right up
You got it buddy: the large print giveth, and the small print taketh away
Change into a nine-year-old Hindu boy, get rid of your wife,
And it walks your dog, and it doubles on sax
Doubles on sax, you can jump back Jack, see you later alligator
And it steals your car
It gets rid of your gambling debts, it quits smoking
It's a friend, and it's a companion,
And it's the only product you will ever need
Follow these easy assembly instructions it never needs ironing
Well it takes weights off hips, bust, thighs, chin, midriff,
Gives you dandruff, and it finds you a job, it is a job
And it strips the phone company free take ten for five exchange,
And it gives you denture breath
And you know it's a friend, and it's a companion
And it gets rid of your traveler's checks
It's new, it's improved, it's old-fashioned
Well it takes care of business, never needs winding,
Never needs winding, never needs winding
Gets rid of blackheads, the heartbreak of psoriasis,
Christ, you don't know the meaning of heartbreak, buddy,
C'mon
'Cause it's effective, it's defective, it creates household odors,
It disinfects, it sanitizes for your protection
It gives you an erection, it wins the election
Why put up with painful corns any longer?
It's a redeemable coupon, no obligation, no salesman will visit your home
We got a jackpot, jackpot, jackpot, prizes, prizes, prizes, all work guaranteed
How do we do it, how do we do it, how do we do it, how do we do it
We need your business, we're going out of business

the solution was wrote before the advertisement

OP write me your name on a piece of paper

Do you currently have a pen? Like right now? No?
This blue pen is for sale

Can you write me the reasons why you arent a fag
oh wait you cant because ur a fag

I miss ole George.

jesus fuck take my money

...

oldfag there only way is to stick it up your ass sideways

Yoink

how many can i put you down for?

You wanna write a big cheque for your brand new sports car?

You wanna write down that 10/10's number so you can fuck her later?

You wanna sign your new CEO contract?

This pen is all you need.

Hello sir! hi.
Can we speak for a moment? My name is user
Mind if I know yours?
...
Well user, look, I have a problem
I was given this, insurmountable task, it really is something
really challenging I promise.

I was tasked with selling this single, blue, bic ballpoint pen. MSRP is $0.99
I know, just an insane thing to ask of someone, right?

Anyways user, look. I'm gonna go ahead and ask you to help me out
you buy this pen from me, and I'll make sure to get a good word in for you with
the boss. You like preferential treatment, right user? I can make it happen.

Anyways thanks for listening to my little spiel, meet me up front if you want to make the best use of that $0.99 that you possibly could. Thanks!

You need this pen to sell penny stocks

Free p&p

you can use it to blow spitballs or cut out the middle man and just blow me

The pen is blue

but Waite there's more I'll trow in this picture I drew with it

It goes in your butt.

President Trump used it to sign the Declaration of Independence

Yeah that's fake news are you a reporter for CNN or just an old fag

It can only draw cocks. Perfect for a faggot like you. Now that will be $12.

Mother fucker, is that a diner in Folsom PA?

Thanks to Milo old fag their

Sold

hot damn I wish I had a watermelon

Its a pen, just steal it

Couldn't possibly...this is our advanced model only used by those at the top of their game, I don't think you're ready for this pen, do you?