Ask a guy with a small piece of garlic in his poopyhole in a desperate attempt to try to cure his external hemerrhoid...

ask a guy with a small piece of garlic in his poopyhole in a desperate attempt to try to cure his external hemerrhoid anything. pic not mine mine is smaller

Other urls found in this thread:

discord.
quora.com/Do-hemorrhoids-pop-If-so-what-action-is-recommended-in-the-case-of-a-popped-hemorrhoid
twitter.com/NSFWRedditImage

Garlic? Why garlic? Did you read that somewhere?

Also how painful is it? Shit looks nasty. Is it a burning, dull or itchy kinda pain?

ive read it on the internet better try than do nothing, and its fucking burning as hell my poopyhole is suffering so much right now

Go buy hemerrhoid cream? Or go to the dorctor?
They have been treatable for over 2000 years, no reason to sit there with garlic up your ass...

the garlic wants to come out right but the hemerrhoid kinda overlaps the exit and keeps the garlic in my asshole

Why are you trying bullshit home remedies and not going to a doctor?

Wouldn't it be better to get some preparation H?
Don't be shy about it, chemists dont give a shit.

Also how did you get it?

just lol

wtf, just go to a doctor. I had something like this, hurts like fuck. It took the doctor 5 Minutes to cut it open and fix it. Healed up perfectly within 3 days.

>this is what happens when you do anal stimulation

Better go to a doctor otherwise your anus will be uncontrollable later on. You be shitting yourself constantly

eat only food with fiber, drink lots of water, use some low preasured water to clean your anus, dont use any type of tissues. use some neutral cream to prevent more damage in your skin. IM NOT A DOCTOR and you need to visit one as soon as possible, but thats what i do when i get hemorroids and works fine with me. Walk for a while, dont stay too much time sitting,

my anus was hurting for a while it was today that i checked my poopyblaster out in the mirror to see whats wrong with it and i saw a big purple hemerrhoid so ima try out home remedies first before i go to the docter or something that shit is embarassing af

i had pain on my anus for about a week so i looked in a mirror and saw that i had a hemerrhoid

do you get hemorroids often?

+ im only 18 that shit normally happens to people in their 40s..

dude..seriously,,dont do that ..i was a chronic sufferer and this doctor told me to try Daflon 500 it was all gone in less than 3 days..

Squat, get a bag of peas or an ice pack and press it against your asshole for a while (this reduces the inflammation of the vein with the constricted blood supply (your haemorrhoid).
Then using a haemorrhoid cream on your fingers, push the bugger back up into your ass (it will pinch and sting when you do this) then clench your ring tight and remain in position. Its an idea to re-apply the frozen peas/pack at this point.
Keep clenching your ring. If the haemorrhoid has been out for a couple of days or more, which I suspect it has then it will pop out again in a while so you will have to do this again. Maybe tree or four times over a couple of days.

This ways you learn how to pop them in if it ever happens again and get used to dealing with the pinching discomfort when you do. Most times you won't need to use ice if you deal with them immediately.

thats prob for internal hemorrhoids i have an external one

ill check into that

dude, serious protip here, speaking from experience:

nothing cures hemorroids faster than walking

when I get a hemorroid I immediately take on walking atleast 4 kilometers per day and the roid goes completely away within a week.

If you go to the doctor before it pops itself they'll probably drain it.

If you let it pop in it's own time like i did you'll be pishing blood out of your arse for 2 or 3 days.

I asked Sup Forums at the time and was pretty much told "DO NOT POP IT"

Dude for fuck sake. Sit on a pillow, try to make a hole in the center to suspend your anus. Eat a lot of fiber, drink a lot of water. Pain should go away in a week or so. And it'll start to disappear. You can always see a surgeon and have the clot removed if it's too uncomfortable.

No, its for external haemorrhoids.
Take it or leave it - it's perfectly safe and sound.

If its actually like the photo that's thrombosed, so it won't "just go away".

If it doesn't get drained it'll pop internally and you'll be wearing fannypads on your arsehole for a few days.

could be what caused my hemorrhoid i dont go outside that much lately maybe i should try that

>
so if i dont do anything with my hemorrhoid it will pop?

but it will cure after that and no more hemorroids for me?

should i just pop it myself?

Yes, it'll be painful as fuck for a while and then the pressure will ease off and you'll fart sizeable amounts of blood for a few days.

It gets fucking painful before that point, by the time i got to the doctor it had already started to drain itself so they wouldn't do anything.

For future i'd work on your diet, after that i had a colonoscopy and they told me i had the bowel of someone twice my age because of drinking so much and just eating shitty food

You'll probably still get small internal ones if you don't look after your gut, but i've only had one thrombosed one.

so i should eat more healthy?

discord.
---------------
gg/ctagmQE

From what they told me in the thread i made when i was considering hanging myself over mine that'll most likely make things much worse.

They said squeezing it probably won't pop it but it will multiply the pain significantly. Another guy said he did manage to pop his but it got all infected.

The actual hemerroid is internal, its just gotten blocked and swollen out like a varicose vein or something.

I haven't had any problems since, but you have my sympathy dude. Seriously was considering killing myself it was so painful.

Lots of fibre, lots of water. Less processed shit and maybe more moderation with alcohol.

so its just waiting it out until it pops by itself or go and see a doctor..

Frequent warm shallow baths in salt water can sooth it, and instead of using TP after a shit use a shower. It's fucking annoying to do but the silkiest toilet paper feels like flaming sandpaper on those cunts.

Basically yeah. I had to wait 3 days for a doctor, in that time it popped itself and they told me i should've just gone to ER come to think of it. So maybe ER?

Up to you dude, if it's close to the photo (mine was similar) you've got an uncomfortable week ahead at least no matter which option you pick.

>1. It will not pop, and dont try to.
>2. Buy dental floss at local store.
>3. Take string of floss, and make a loop.
>4. Place loop around roid.
>5. Grit teeth, tighten loop hard, tie in knot.
>6. Said roid will fall off in about 1 week.
>7. Enjoy.

i always wash my ass with water out of one of those plant watering cans then dry my ass with toilet paper

Jesus fucking christ. I spent most of my concentration not flexing my buttocks because it was agony

mine is verry close to that pic too its almost purple so i guess ill wait untill it pops. im way too shy to see a doctor for this

If it's like the picture it'll pop itself within 3 days

emphasis on #5.

emphasis on #1.

It'll speed things up if you do, they'll give you medicines to shove up and around your asshole which will speed things up a lot.

I was embarassed too, but they spend half their day fingering people and they don't remember you.

The external doesnt pop, the internal drains. They don't recommend removing them unless there are serious problems as you can do proper damage to your butthole.

quora.com/Do-hemorrhoids-pop-If-so-what-action-is-recommended-in-the-case-of-a-popped-hemorrhoid

It took serious effort and time just to delicately clean my asshole when i had a thrombosed hemmerhoid, never mind tying fucking knots around it. If you've done this fair fucking play but there was no chance of me managing it with mine. I must have a very sensitive asshole.

Doctor told me it was because of the 5 internal ones i had and one had gotten thrombosed and bulged out. I didn't argue with that since i was basically doing hot watery farts every fifteen minutes which were pure blood, as in the blood was coming from inside.

They did say it'll leave a skintag on the outside though, which it has.

I dabbed on apple cider vinegar. It burns like a bitch and a half, but it helped.

Your statement is correct.

This is D.I.Y. Sup Forumsro science. However it will work. A doctor is just going to put a tiny rubber band around it; same effect.

they only do the rubber band thingy with internal ones

They banded the 5 internal ones i had when i went back for a checkup after my thrombosed one, but after i just felt like i had a basketball in my bowel for 2 hours then apparently shit all the bands out. Still no flareups since but i've stopped drinking spirits.

prep h doesnt do shit

you are a raging retard

Im never going to make period jokes again after it pops and cures.

>Sucess

I dunno, there was a very nice sense of relief every 15 minutes going "ffft" and farting hot blood into my little home made BodyForm. If it weren't for the fact that all the rest was fucking agony i could do that bit again.

>butthurt

Doesn't really cure though, it means you definitely have at least one internal and they don't really go away unless banding works. Just need to up the fibre and the hydration, make sure you're shitting decent logs instead of straining to squirt out hot sour water.

Mine popped in my sleep and soaked through my sheets and both sides of my mattress, so maybe put some towels down.

so the internal onces will cure with fibre and hydration?

Use apple vinegar, stings a bit but relieves it a bit. Also helps them shrink

Won't cure exactly, will just calm down. Less blood on the TP, less internally itchy arsehole.

They'll still be there, but they won't bother you so much (if at all, i forgot i had mine until this thread) but it's a fucked up vein or something inside your ass which gets agitated. Thrombosed is super agitated, bloody TP and itchy inner ass is mildly agitated. They'll come back if you don't look after yourself unless you get them banded off, but that didn't work for me.

The banding is basically what the madman user with the dental floss suggested, but they shove this sort of dildo camera up your ass and shoot little rubber bands onto each fucked up vein so they die and drop off. It was fucking uncomfortable and didn't work for me tbh

U DO KNOW YOU CANT GET CHEMICLE BURNS FROM GARLIC RIGHT, YOU WERE BETTER OFF EATING IT

I already got it out after 3 minutes

Did you eat it?

duh i dont like food going to waste ya know

...

Patrician my fellow user. I never understood using the petrified corpses of trees to clean your poopchute instead of water. Water is the only thing that will truly clean it.

I popped mine and squeezed the purple jelly out. Never came back. Well I never popped it I noticed it was bleeding and put one finger on the inside, one on the out and boogied. Good luck fixing up your bum