I practice MMA for 7 years now, boxing in parallel for 6 years, I could. Not to count strength training at the gym for 4 years, 6 ft 1 1/2 for 189 lbs.
I have an insane speed, reflexes similar to my speed. I just have to wait for him to charge me, dodge his attacks, and throw good punches to his head. I won't stop, and at the smallest mistake he does, the gorilla is finished.
You'll always have virgins from here thinking that it's impossible.
First, nothing is impossible with will, my friends, and 2) that's not with your weak ass bodies that you'll do anything.
Any man with a minimum of training can beat a gorilla with a knife anyway.
With bare hands, that is not necessarily more complicated, it just requires technical skills.
the real question is this.... could you seduce, and make sweet sweet love to a gorilla?
Cooper Ward
issou
Nathan Campbell
A lot of it is body language, I was involved in interspecies combat for many years. Gorillas are formidable opponents unless you can phase then with the right body language. All the skill in the world won't save your skin if the gorilla thinks you're scare. Scream and charge at the fucker and land a flurry of punches with the fury of a thousand suns.
Chimps are another matter, in many ways I'd sooner fight a gorilla than a chimp. My last fight was with a chimp, the whole thing was weighing heavy on my conscience and it was that fight that finished it. He was blind in one eye and he wanted me dead he did some real damage, I didn't come out on top. I made enough money to quit for good, but I felt bad for the chimp, I knew he didn't want to fight. He sensed my weakness and I was finished.
Nathaniel Edwards
I am all for you trying
Alexander Green
Faggot gonna rape a gorilla
James Davis
>Interspecies combat
Beating your girlfriend doesn't count
William Miller
You couldn't fight your way out of your momma's basement, boy
Mason Cooper
Bear wrestling was a thing once, before people got all pussified. But I'm still going to bet that you'd get fucking rekt trying to fight a Gorilla like you would a human.
Isaac Anderson
>i was involved in interspecies combat for many years
this is a new copypasta
Jose Bell
You talk big over the Internet little man.
Noah Robinson
Way ahead of you user
Christopher Murphy
Wonder how this would play out...
>OP dances around the ring >OP sticks and move, floating like a butterly >OP throws several ninja kicks, impressing the judges >Gorilla grabs OP and smashes him against a tree like mammy beating a rug >Gorilla pulls OP's arms off
Andrew King
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.
Thomas Nelson
kek
Logan Richardson
Unless you have trained for gorilla warfare, you won't be able to takedown a gorilla, it's that simple.
Andrew Morgan
What in Davy Jones’ locker did ye just bark at me, ye scurvy bilgerat? I’ll have ye know I be the meanest cutthroat on the seven seas, and I’ve led numerous raids on fishing villages, and raped over 300 wenches. I be trained in hit-and-run pillaging and be the deadliest with a pistol of all the captains on the high seas. Ye be nothing to me but another source o’ swag. I’ll have yer guts for garters and keel haul ye like never been done before, hear me true. You think ye can hide behind your newfangled computing device? Think twice on that, scallywag. As we parley I be contacting my secret network o’ pirates across the sea and yer port is being tracked right now so ye better prepare for the typhoon, weevil. The kind o’ monsoon that’ll wipe ye off the map. You’re sharkbait, fool. I can sail anywhere, in any waters, and can kill ye in o’er seven hundred ways, and that be just with me hook and fist. Not only do I be top o’ the line with a cutlass, but I have an entire pirate fleet at my beck and call and I’ll damned sure use it all to wipe yer arse off o’ the world, ye dog. If only ye had had the foresight to know what devilish wrath your jibe was about to incur, ye might have belayed the comment. But ye couldn’t, ye didn’t, and now ye’ll pay the ultimate toll, you buffoon. I’ll shit fury all over ye and ye’ll drown in the depths o’ it. You’re fish food now, lad.
Gavin Thompson
What about going down on a gorilla?
Tyler Evans
Record it, watching you make yourself look a cunt and dying very quickly would sweep the net. Lol. Do it I say.
Gabriel Baker
You'll never beat a gorilla. They'll just plague your economy with their ineptness whilst simultaneously blaming you for their failures.
>muh racisms
Juan Peterson
Gorilla gonna rape a faggot
Michael Bailey
I'll say the same thing i said last time this b8 has been posted:
If you wanna assert dominance and scare a Gorilla, beat your chest in front of it
Cameron Clark
...
Ryan Lewis
Or rape it.
Parker Perez
Well you seem pretty confident, who am I to judge? Go for it op, break into the local zoo and put one of those fuckers in their place. I'll wait for the news reports.
Logan Parker
beat this guy, u cunt.
William Davis
probably possible, but if he hits you once, and you fall or something similar, he gonna fuck you up
Easton Baker
I'm not certain a gorilla will find OP beating his basement dweller chest and then dying of heart complications from overexertion anyhow dominant or scary.
Jason Gonzalez
In order to raep a gorilla, you have to assert dominance
Which i instructed in my previous post
Joshua Wilson
easy. i will sneak attack him, sweep his legs from under, and attempt a flying armbar. he will be immobilized.
Leo Ortiz
Dumbass... If you knew anything about gorillas, you'd know that beating your chest in front of them is a sure way one way trip to death
Adrian Baker
But can you gain his trust, seduce him and then slip qaaludes into his drink and have sex with his paralyzed body?
Gavin Flores
189 pounds? So like 1/30th what a teenage (not full grown) gorrilla weighs, you would throw all your punches and break your pussy wrists on its fur nevermind its muscle, then it would tear your arm right off and eat you halfway, realize how gross you taste and leave you to die slowly, you are an idiot and a half.
Robert James
Zookeeper here. A 20 monkey will fuck up any MMA dude if the monkey is pissed or scared. You can not imagine the intensity and skills such an animal will display. Their canine teeth are not vestigial like ours... they work.
Nolan Adams
I hope you achieve your dreams and come face to face with a gorilla.
Oliver Walker
Wot the fok did ye just say 2 me m8? i dropped out of newcastle primary skool im the sickest bloke ull ever meet & ive nicked ova 300 chocolate globbernaughts frum tha corner shop. im trained in street fitin’ & im the strongest foker in tha entire newcastle gym. yer nothin to me but a cheeky lil bellend w/ a fit mum & fakebling
Benjamin Barnes
You do realize it would tear you limb from limb and you would barely phase it with any kind of hit? Actually go do it, I have confidence in your ability to remove yourself from the gene pool, I hope you haven't managed to breed yet.
Luis Garcia
20 lb. monkey
Jacob Robinson
If a chimp can literally tear your face off, I like your odds against a Gorilla.
Cooper Kelly
The bears were always trained dumbass, they didn't wrestle wild bears they'd get murdered like it's nothing
Carson Mitchell
>my last fight was with a chimp
i love Sup Forums
Christian Ortiz
Like you know so much about wrestling bears, you've probably never seen one outside a gym. Bitch.
Levi Turner
...
Grayson Jackson
Guess OP is a navy seal, he's clearly trained in gorilla warfare.
Camden Bailey
Kek
Landon Morales
Lol... what a joke you are
Owen Richardson
I lol'd
Hunter Butler
Topkek
Ryder Brown
cant beleive you typed all that up you sound like a faggot
Daniel Price
how new are you, hey guys get a load of this newfag! sure is summer in here! this guy doesn't get it. We got newfag here, his guys the real deal, n e w f a g
Luis James
Kek Summer is upon us
David Wood
thanks for the (you) friend, perhaps i wont kill myself today
Isaac Wood
Record it, timestamp it, and make your declaration. Until then, your claim is unproven.
Blake Hall
do you retards actually believe doesnt realize its copy? sure smells like summer.
Dylan Edwards
K
Asher Edwards
OP is a fucking retard
Jack Reyes
No no no accept your summer fagdom
Juan Foster
Sure feels like winter in here. Fuck off winterfag. Go fag up someone else's image board.
Joseph Wilson
gl.
Jaxon Wood
I don't think you realize just exactly how strong a silverback is. One time at the zoo when I was a child I once watched one in the Gorilla exhibit pick up a large tractor tire, put it above his head, and then squeeze it like it was a fooze ball. The inner sides touch each other. When he was done, and threw it the thing made such a loud crash as it hit the ground, and finally span into stillness.
I didn't think my of it when I was a kid, but I work construction now, and know how fucking heavy, and incredibly hard it is to bend those things.
You wouldn't stand a chance. Even if you had a knife.
Josiah Jackson
...
Isaiah Butler
>deepwater jew
Andrew Jones
>fuck off winterfag
Brandon Ramirez
gorillas are made of iron
Jason Thomas
its spring
Dominic Richardson
see
Alexander Jackson
i dont get it
Christian Rodriguez
Martial arts are nothing more than men doing ballerina shit. Weak minded people fight, weaker minded people train to fight. Idiots make it a hobby, retards get in the ring.
Why not just practice car crashes and boast about how you can fuck up a dump truck with a Honda Civic?
Bentley Powell
Okay, I believe you. Let's see it. Live stream.
William Rivera
It's their fragile masculinity, i denounced my gender a long time ago. Gender is OVER
So stop bragging about it on the internet and show us.
Julian Miller
>He was blind in one eye and he wanted me dead Kek
Josiah Watson
...
Grayson Bailey
It's a copypasta, newfags.
Alexander Long
So do you douche bag
Blake Thomas
Gorillas, chimps, and orangutans can all turn a car tire inside out and tie them into a pretzel knot, and that's out of shape zoo animals. Inagine what a wild one could do.
Jaxon Perez
Despite their strength all these monkeys have the capacity to be affectionate companions. makes you think
