Good moяning, tovarishi!

Good moяning, tovarishi!
Today, I being to you western dogs the most horrifying turd greatest superhero movie of all time, Guardians/Zashitniki!
DESU, the trailer is actually somewhat good when no characters are on the screen, but I just know that the result will be only reasonable to watch with your buddy, completely stoned, just to laugh at how fucking idiotic it all is.

youtube.com/watch?v=WsQVdrillxA

Subtitles are in English, you can turn them on in settings menu.
My prayers for a near-future epic military action once again go unanswered.

Bear in mind that this is supposed to be our answer to Avengers.
Note how russian memebers are a brutish animal and a natasha.

Whoa is this a remake of Morozko?

No(

>russian capeshit
mite b gud

cgi looks better than most flicks released today kek

i hate the ruskies but that looks like a cool flick

RISE FROM YOU'RE GRAVE

>Bear in mind

>supposed to be our answer to Avengers

why would based russia feel the need to mimic a flick produced by the USA? it's like an admission of inferiority. they should make their own epic kino and leave american garbage american.

>the trailer is actually somewhat good when no characters are on the screen

>it's like an admission of inferiority
If you look at the movies released in russia for the past 20 or so years and compare them to western media - it pretty much is an admission of inferiority. I can remember only a couple decent films. Current russian movie industry is drowning in the shittiest possible comedy films, which are 90% jokes about being drunk.
They aren't even "so bad it's good" they are just shit.
But first and foremost this movie will flop because there is no necessary cultural background for it. At least it will get a couple of laughs out of me once it can be pirated. Giving money to the director would actually do further harm to the industry.

>no sjw pandering, just testosterone.

Based Russia.

one of the few movies I genuinely look forward to tbqh. We need more non-american capekino

Gib Crimea.

This. Russia should find its own themes to make cgi fests about. Comic book reading was not a thing in the soviet union.
Ruskies should refocus on dark sci fi, post apocalyptic action/dystopia.
They have the literary background and the cinematic backbone.
Making russian comicshit is retarded.

Special effects almost look ok but not quit there.

Their soviet culture got smashed and they were left with only their cultural dicks in their hands.
Russians need to return to their roots. christian orthodoxy, folk tales, their own brand of heroes and villains etc..
They need to dig there and find ways to make what is at the root of these things be relevant to modern day cinema.
Copying capeshit is a lost cause and cultural bankruptcy.

>I just know that the result will be only reasonable to watch with your buddy, completely stoned, just to laugh at how fucking idiotic it all is.

>implying that's not the description of the capeshit genre as a whole

What's the point of the coldsteel knife guy? What are his powers?

He's basically Quicksilver but with knives. I think he can teleport too? He's the character I'll be looking out for.

>quit

just like your typing, nigga

>Prince of Persia, an Earthbender, the bad guy from Ironman 2 and the bear from Tekken team up against CGI walking tanks from 2006
Where can I preorder?

this looks like something you would see on syfy when flipping thru channels

>My prayers for a near-future epic military action once again go unanswered.

I secretly hope for a reaction against the "the armed forces act like they have less than one braincell" and/or "nope, the bad guys are immune to everything up too and including nuclear weapons" tropes common in capeshit.
I just want a capeshit movie where the protagonist fill some very specialized role but it's obvious that the great majority of the fighting is done by normal soldiers with the existing very deadly arsenals we have today.