Meanwhile, at the Sup Forums Cinema

>Meanwhile, at the Sup Forums Cinema

*muffled gunshots*

Could I get some crab legs? Oh and a warm baguette for my condor?

>takes crab legs and falcon into cinema

You ready for some Kino lads?

Now Playing

sign says 'No Couples Policy'

...

R-Robert?

>CAAAAAAWWWWWWW

>showing pre-renovation pictures

>no guard watchtower with spotlight and the labyrinth to the screening kinoteques
that pic must've been taken pre-2014

>condor
GET OUT

>Meanwhile, at the Sup Forums Cinema

t.couldn't afford the vastly superior condor
It doesn't even need a licence

>Ayo user how's it going nigga? I got your shit all set up dawg exactly like you asked, problem child 2 and crab legs. Now did you bring some more white women for me to fuk?

What does the Snack Bar serve?

I want a complete menu.

It CAN'T just be Crab Legs and nothing else.

These threads always make me wonder how many of you have been to a movie theater? I can't remember the last time I actually went to one, it seems like a totally antiquated idea at this point

The fuck is your problem?

I haven't left the local movie theater since 2003.

>no dance room
>no complementary eye seeing dogs for blind people

i haven't been to one in almost a decade, the last two things i watched in one were apocalypto and the harry potter movie that came out that year and both of them cause my high school friends dragged me

Why are you talking like that Robert? Have you been drinking on the job? This isn't you man.

Not everyone is a shut-in without friends.

I go 3 or 4 times a year

What do you guys do during the commercial breaks? My theatre used to have them every 20 minutes before for 5 minutes at a time, but now they've changed to a 10min Movie/10min Commercial split

The No singles policy has made me an outlaw really

Sometimes I go for a spin in the theatre go karts

I dont especially hate it when people use them DURING the movie but it can get annoying when they keep ramming your seat

>watching Jurassic World
>BDH comes on screen for the first time
>hear a subtle *splat* all around me
>the guy next to me yells "MOMMY!"
>everyone else laughs
>two guys are walking up and down the aisle to my right banging their firsts on the sides of their heads while saying "mommy" over and over again
>here a shuffle in the back
>a shirtless shadow runs down the middle isle up to the projection of BDH
>he spreads his arms and legs on the wall while screaming "I NEED MOMMY'S MILKY. I NEED MOMMY'S MILKY!"
>everyone else keeps laughing, even louder now
>more people banging their heads with their fists, some are clapping their knuckles together in front of them
>movie cuts to a scene with Chris Pratt
>the man on the wall jumps back and start yelling "BRING MOMMY BACK! BRING MOMMY BACK! GET RHE BAD MAN AWAY FROM MOMMA'S BOY!"
>mfw every one else starts crying and repeating the same thing
At least they had good crab legs and a nice young black gentleman to serve me popcorn.

>no singles policy
>no ticket rippers
>no penis inspection
>not a single anvil or falcon in sight

It's just you, a room full of kino and the... lurking thing behind you...

I go nearly every day, if they didn't throw me out when they closed up I would sleep in the isle so I didn't miss the first showing

Heres how my theatre goes

>movie is scheduled to start at 7:15pm
>at 7:17pm, commercials start
>10 minutes of just car and bank commercials
>7:27pm
>a little preview clip with a title that says "COMING SOON"
>7:28pm
>trailer after trailer after trailer
>usually all the trailers look like absolute shit, generic and predictable
>finally it's 7:40pm, the movie FINALLY starts
>20 minutes of loud obnoxious shit being shoved in your face

I hate the movies.

Tyrone! how do you do my fine friend? and of course! let me introduce you to my daughter Katy.

>Sorry, sir. This theatre has a strict 'no singles' policy.

Good thing I have these dubs

Jokes on you boy, I have my mom with me

>theater doesn't have a doggy day care

YOU WISH!

Very well. Check these out

>theatre has a strict no-humans policy

Excuse me? Care to look at the upper right, sir?

kek

Well my good man, you'll glad to see THESE

I'm glad Robert's enjoying a day off with my wife while I watch her son.

Once or twice a month I guess, I go whenever there's a movie I want to see. I fucking love going to the theater.

>>>/reddit/

I go to the theatre showers a couple times a movie

Crab legs
Premium Crab legs
3D Crab legs
New Crab legs
NuCrab legs
Straight white Crab legs
Jamal's juice
GMO enhanced Peanuts
Cool Aid fountain

don't forget Jamal's Middle Leg