Question:
How many of you guys frequently consider suicide? I'm not talking about the overly dramatic kind, but the one where you seriously think about ending it all because everything in life just gets too much.
If so, what made you reach that point? And how do you deal with it? I feel that I am slowly reaching my limit, and I do not know what do do.
>inb4 do it faggot. Don't worry, I'm considering it.
Every day. I lost my job and went on a huge drug binge during which I put myself $10,000+ in debt, burned all ties with my family/friends and now have pending criminal charges. My looks have deteriorated and my confidence is shot. It sucks because my life was great before this.
It sucks to hear that dude. How did it happen?
Every time I think really hard about my life and all of it's miseries I always end on the conclusion that I would rather kill everyone that is causing problems in my life rather than killing myself. They're the cause of my problems and grief, no matter how much I try to do right or good by them, fuck them! Then logic kicks in and I decide that selling or abandoning everything and moving to a different country would be a better option.
every day. my inheritance money has run out and I'm in massive debt, but I just don't have the will to get a job. I don't know if it's anxiety, chronic fatigue or what. Right now my options are sell the house I inherited (Fully paid off, no mortgage) or kill myself and let my relatives deal with all the crap.
Usually whenever I sober up enough to realize how I've never done anything with my life. Fat retarded girlfriend, live in my dad's living room in the middle of nowhere. I just stay drunk and tinker on projects in the garage, ignoring the past and future.
But having other people clean up your stuff isn't the answer either right? Why do you have trouble getting and holding down a job?
How old are you dude? Things are never too late to change right?
Just one thing led to another. I've always had alcohol+drug problems. I landed a great job in my field and started working towards bettering myself. My fiance and I ended up splitting and I decided to start drinking a bit again and it slowly became more of a problem leading to some of my work suffering. They let me go right before the end of the work day, the day before pay day. I spent my night in the car before making a trip up the city the next day to binge on heroin, cocaine/crack and whatever I came across. Soon I found myself out of money and sought unemployment, but ended up being denied because I was arrested while it was pending for drug charges. I pulled some strings and came into a large sum of money, which I blew on getting high as balls over the next few months and because I wasn't taking care of myself I lost 70lbs, my teeth began to rot and this is also the time when I began to basically give a big fuck you to everybody else. The money ran out and now the IRS is up my ass, I have no job and I'm probably going to prison. I know nobody is to blame but myself so I really don't expect sympathy for my predicament and enduring this hell with nobody left seems worse than death at this point. If I wasn't so frightened about the crossover, I'd have already offed myself.
Define crossover dude
I'm 33. I don't really sit around wallowing in self-pity or anything. I basically just float through life with zero accomplishments, zero goals, zero usefulness. I'm sure I'll have to change or off myself eventually. But for now I just stay trashed and pretend life is great.
I don't have trouble keeping jobs or even getting them really. I've always done well at my jobs. I took time off work to care for my sick and dying mother and taking care of a shut in turned me into one. I just get major anxiety every time I think about even looking for a new job. I have a bachelor's degree in business, but no idea what I want to do, and I hate job interviews more than anything. My doctor started me on Lexapro (antidepressant) but I think I need xanax or something like that too
I think he means what happens after he pulls the trigger, if you sniff my drift XD
I kind of feel the same though.
I have the same actually...I even want to start on a master's. But I am scared shitless to what comes after. I'd be 27 when I finish, but I fear that I might be too old and employers would not want me due to a lack of work experience.
Oh, you are so hilarious.
I do whenever I can't distract myself from reality.
>If so, what made you reach that point?
Poor life choices and mental illness.
>And how do you deal with it?
Distracting myself from reality as much as I possibly can.
I'm basically not living. Just watching shows or movies and playing vidya. There's no substance to my life, nor will I put in the effort to acquire substance.
Pretty much this. Not knowing what it feels like to die makes me nervous. I know that it's probably next to nothing, but that doesn't stop me from wondering.
This pretty much sums up my life.
Sorry to hear that, user.
You at least have a job, or what?
I wish for death.
I really do.
I do not want to hurt my mother or father with it...but I just really really wish not to be on this earth anymore.
For some reason everything I do hurts me, mentally, and I'm starting to get sick of it.
I just can't go on anymore. I'm tired, so, so tired.
i think about how much there is to live for. Even if my life seems depressing right now it won't be forever. Also I stay focused on that fact we can have and achieve whatever we want if we stay focused patient and put in the effort. That helps motivate me. Also I think suicide is a pussies way out and a very selfish act if you have people who love and rely on you.
I don't think I could do it to my 2 year old son. I wouldn't want to have grown up with a father who killed himself so I won't put that on my child.
I would never do it if I have children. But dude, I literally have no-one. I've got a shit degree which I can't find passion in, bad looks, and a constant depression which I've had since I was twelve.
Freddy Prinze Jr turned out fine. Your son can too!
I tried to become a better man. I've failed.
I tried to date that girl. I failed.
I tried to have good grades. I failed.
I tried to learn martial arts. I failed.
I tried to work out. I failed.
I tried to look beautiful. I failed.
I tried to make friends. I failed
I'm a worthless piece of human scum. I should have listened to my bullies and topped myself back then. Now it's just endless suffering in my own mind. I don't even have a big reason because I'm more privileged than most people.
There's just nothing to look up to. The only thing stopping me is family. My granddad, my grandmom, my mom, my dad, and the elders on her side. If one day they pass away and my situation doesn't change. Then I'm pretty sure I'll do it.
The main reason i don't end it all is because of my Mother. She has done so much for me and if i killed myself now that would absolutley destroty her. And i can't do that. The least i can do for her is try and better myself and get a job where i can pay all her bills
I don't want to kill myself.
But I wouldn't stop it if my car started to veer off a cliff or head on collision.
ITT genetic inferiority
I love my privileged life
Pretty consistently throughout the day, it's like the default setting, or underlying hum, my brain has been operating on top of my entire adult life since I was about 16. I'm 40 now, and don't expect it will ever change. It's not a big deal, and nit worth talking about, I just chalk it up to both sides of my family being from Germany and still very much Old Country, with that whole cousin-fucking psycho OCD judgemental asshole mania being part of the culture and personality that comes with the territory.
Basically mental illness and barbarism runs deep in my glorious white lineage.
Checking in. I'm thinking about it right now. I'm 41, no gf, no kids, no career to speak of. Life hasn't been any fun for 10 - 15 yrs. I'm not seriously depressed or likely to actually kill myself, but if I died tomo I wouldn't be bothered. Sucks to have run out of good life.
Really? It's a given that there are some people less fortunate in the world, but it's no reason to be a prick about it.
I'm sorry to hear that dude. But please don't be judgemental over yourself. It's not needed
I'm half german and this gives me slight hope
I know the feeling dude :/
I can only say that I'm feeling for you.
Anyone else?
Same.
This guy right here. I tell myself everyday to burn the house down with myself in it.
I wish I could take all your pains away anons. Just to be able to live in bliss without constant agony. I really wish I was able to improve your lives :/
But then again, I am barely able to manage myself