Feels thread

Feels thread
>pic related
>experienced no happiness for the past 6 years
>always angry, sad, anxious or a mixture of shit feelings
>still slowly getting worse and worse
>been treated as non-existent by everyond except for my family
>basically my only reason I want to stay alive
>lose multiple hours a day to OCD
>intrusive thoughts never leave
>fog inside my head, yet feeling empty
>had CBT, seroquel, prozac, some other SSRI's I don't remember the name of, currently on venlafaxine, still makes no difference
I don't really know what to do anymore

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You'd basically be describing me if you said you were also a hypochondriac. I feel you man. I've been diagnosed with severe generalized anxiety, bipolar disorder, intrusive thought OCD, and manic depression.

That's pretty shit man, have you found any proper help?

I go to talk therapy twice a week. It doesn't help. But I can't be put on proper medication until zoloft is fully out of my system.

>Born with a tumor, operation at 1, scar tissue, as I recently found out is the cause for my epilepsy
>family was disfunctional, when I found out I have epilepsy everyone cut off contact with me
>Social outcast from childhood, had little to no social interactions with people untill I was 16
>No friends, last gf left me for some other guy
>Tried killing myself three times now, booze + painkillers and anti-depressants, but woke up every time
I just want someone to put me out of my misery

I tried that one too! And I think there was one more... Think I'm going to ask my doctor for something different soon, this is not how it should be going...

yeah it doesnt help right? if anything it made me worse. Once the zoloft is out of my system theyre gonna try putting me on prozac. Im hoping for the best. Hopefully all goes well for you after you see your doctor

...

It didn't help but it didn't do anything bad either. Hopefully prozac will do more for you than it did for me. At least you're reacting differently to SSRI's it seems, so there is good hope.

Maybe trying different medication or therapy would be helpful, don't know how much you've been through already tho.

By that you mean how much meds? I can't recall all the names of the meds at this point...
If you meant how much bullshit I've gone through in life:
>Parents split when I was 4, just around the tims problems with rheumatic arthritis started
>Was on meds+painkillers till 18 from there, both my parents trying to push me off to the other
>Got kicked out of both their homes at 18
>Lived on the streets for a year and a half in a post soviet country (Latvia), before I met U (won't give her name away)
>She let me stay with her for free as long as I didn't do any drugs which I hadn't done and will never do besides booze and tobacco
>Found a deadend job, started dating her after a few months of living together
>Caught her cheating with some Russian cunt five months later
>Been living alone in a one man flat ever since, found a better job tho, co-workers are pricks but atleast the pay is nice...

Mushroom microdoses have seen great improvement I'm depression in a mountain of evidence, albeit anecdotal. shroomery.org/forums/showflat.php/Number

this
lsd works too
microdosing feels like having a coffee that also puts you in a good mood

...

Hey Sup Forums my gf just broke up with me, she thinks I was never honest with her in the first place, truth is she might be right. I was stupid and now she won't take me back and the alcohol isn't helping me at all Sup Forums. She said we needed between us and that I needed to respect her, which means I won't be trying to get her back anytime soon. What should I do Sup Forums, how can I be an honest man, a one who wears his heart right on his sleeves.

That's pretty rough... Hope you'll find some more improvement sooner or later

I might give it a try, LSD is very cheap

be sure that it actually is lsd before taking it, 25i_nbome or whatever its called is the worst thing you could do when depressed
it is for me at least, it always makes me really tense and I never get strong visuals

I hate being a this way a fat autistic weeaboo

i like anime alot because its the only time i feel """"""""""""""""""girls"""""""""""""'""" like me

Still a kissless virgin got a small dicc

its funny i was able to experience a normie life in short bursts but nothing lasts

>pic related
i would be worse if it wasnt for this anime

What's the point in improving if I'm either alone or with people that make me feel alone?

Masturbate more

grand.xxx.auto.com

I just fucking hate living, but i don't want to die.
that's my problem

Praise to kek.
Listen to shadilay.
Its not to late, Kek will accept you.
Be the mischievous man you must be user!

If you weren't honest from the beginning then she wasn't really for you. You got her which means you'll find another and another til you find one you will want to "wear you heart on a sleeve". Cut back on the booze and step out. There's too many women out there to be stuck on one.

Will do user, always trust in Kek.

Not as bad just severe depression and anxiety.
Continually miss work because of it.
I don't even care if I get fired anymore. If I was forced to I'd refuse disability, I'm not taking money that other people earned.
Not suicidal, just hate everything and want to be alone.