Catfish stories thread

Catfish stories thread

I tried to make a thread on this a month or so ago, but it was like 2 in the morning and there werent enough people on to keep it alive, so here we go for round 2

ill start with one i had prewritten from the last thread, this was from when i witnessed a breakup in person, kek:

>be me
>nefariously tapping away on keyboard
>find one chad from my hometown that i knew in highschool
>i fucking hate this guy
>im going to fuck his day
>skim through some random peoples friends lists, and find some guys in the area
>concoctevilplan.jpeg
>chad from hometown is currently in a relationship with a 7/10, shes kinda cute
>not for long
>message chad
>talk about how i was from a neighboring school a few years back and i saw him playing in a basketball game, how hot he was, etc.
>he tries to play hard to get, "man these are the times that i really wish i didnt have a girlfriend"
>shut the fuck up you cuntdigging faggot, i know you want some
>start digging through my stash of naked photos of girls that look like the same body type as my catfish girl
>baseball shirt with black lingerie and slightly pulled down pants
>wunderweapon.png
>send.exe
>chad responds with typical chad bravado bullshit, see right through it
>"well, if youre going to be that pushy"

cont.

leveling my slayer in runescape while im doing this

cont.
>chad then proceeds to send a dick pic to me

not going to lie, it looked fucking horrendous, unkempt, dirty, etc., and random fucks send me their junk on a daily basis

>compliment on how big it was, how it must have been 8 inches
>obviously only like 5.5, maybe 6
>he starts getting cocky, "i can show it to you in person if youd like"
>everything is falling into place

remember those guys i dug around for that lived in the area? yeah, this is where they come into play

>decide against just ruining his relationship by showing proof to his gf, instead decide to have him "meet up" with me
>choose a local cafe as the place
>a place i eat at occasionally, so im going to watch the show
>begin messaging those beta orbiters from earlier, tell them that we are going to meet at the cafe and head to their place after getting something to eat

cont.

Continue

>arrive at the cafe at 5:50, cute waitress already knows what i want, medium sized pork cutlet with swiss cheese with garlic mashed potatoes and sauerkraut on the side
>begin digging in when i notice something out of the corner of my eye
>a black pontiac pulls up
>its chad
>i chuckled as quietly as i could, and he walks in with that stupid fucking confident walk that all chads make
>he sits down at the table i told him, my "favorite table"
>waitress walks over and asks him if he knows what he wants
>he just asks for coffee and that hes waiting on someone
>pic related, its me at this point
>a shitty tan sedan with some thug looking black man rolls in
>its one of the guys from earlier
>he walks in, looks at where the chad is sitting all confused
>then a fucking white sub rolls up
>scrawny punk that looks like he probably smokes pot and skateboard gets out, joins the black man in confusion, both now staring at chad
>they begin conversing with eachother
>where the fuck is the last one
>a street and trail bike rolls up near the cafe with an average looking teen
>he walks into the cafe, looks at the situation with everyone staring right back at him, and walks right the fuck back out

i shit you not, i could not fucking hold it in, i was trying to play it off as some video i was watching on facebook by showing some normie vine to the waitress

cont.

am listening

>the black man begins arguing with chad, telling him that the table is reserved
>chad talks back, saying that it is, but not for him
>stoner faggot just backs up out of the situation and sits somewhere else
>black man sits at a table nearby
>all three pull out their fucking phones
>ohshithereitcomes.jpeg
>3 new messages on messenger
>from chad: "hey where are you? its 6"
>from black guy: "you should probably hurry up, some shitheads are trying to steal our seats"
>from stoner faggot: "hey"
>ignore the other two, message chad
>"dont worry, im almost there, coming around the block"
>chad was in for a fucking surprise
>a white impala comes around the block and parks in front of the sedan
>chads girlfriend comes storming in
>looks at chad
>chad looks at her
>chad
>looks
>at
>her
>she sat down next across the table from chad
>what chad didnt know is that it wasnt going to be me showing up, but rather his girlfriend that i had dumped the evidence on
>she pulls out her phone calmly, and begins showing him what i assume is the conversation between me and chad the other night
>chads face goes red
>"how the fuck did you get that? did you catfish me? what the fuck is wrong with you?"
>"it doesnt matter how i got them, what the fuck is the matter with YOU?"
>verbal fight then begins to break out
>lots of shouting
>waitress tries to calm them down, gets pushed away
>she calls for the cook to drag them outside
>the black guy and stoner faggot are fucking shellshocked by what was going on in front of them, and ended up leaving a little before the couple was thrown out
>before they finished fighting, she yelled as loud as she could "im fucking through with you" and then sped off in her car
>chad sat down on a nearby bench and just looked up at the sky with an angry look, clenching his pants like a crybaby faggot

unfortunately chad wasnt one of the ones who still chased after me despite having his shit fucked right before his eyes

wouldnt trade it for the world

i also used the same catfish account to get nudes from some lesbians if anyone is interested in those

ive got another story prewritten, but its a bit shorter

Sure

Enlighten us on both of those please

...

Thanks user

alright, here comes the next story, and ill be posting the wins to this one is where i used the catfish account to get with a chick i had the hots for

>be me
>really like that waitress from previous story
>she flirts back a lot

no, im not some fat neckbeard for those of you assuming that. im fit, 6ft, and make it a point to live a healthy lifestyle, i just dont bother with too many girls
anyways, back to the story

>turns out waitress-kun has a boyfriend
>let me change that real fast
>find boyfriend via facebook stalking
>message boyfriend
>start my acts of seduction
>he gives in literally minutes within conversation

no joke, this literal waste of human anatomy starts sending metric fucktons of dick pics, like wtf

>bear with it for the cute waitress
>send conversation to her
>they break up and start a shit slinging contest over jewbook
>about 4 days passes
>go to cafe
>make small talk, joke around, make her laugh
>joke around about taking her out sometime
>she gets flustered
>tell her that it doesnt have to be a joke
>she agrees

we dated for about a week, then she broke it off and said that she and dipshit were getting back together and that she had a lot of fun

to this day i havent looked back at her

this chick was the first ever that i managed to score wins from

Since you seem so knowledable on catfishing and what not, how do you do it with success, how do you do it general, and tips/tricks please

she fell asleep after this one, and i just ended up blocking her because she was boring

Did someone say Catfish?

it largely depends on who your target is but you just need to have some pictures of a "model" and make a snapchat/insta/facebook/kik using those pictures and start talking to people

success generally depends on what your goal with the catfish account is

if youre just looking to score some dyke titties, its pretty easy, and ill elaborate here in a second

if youre doing an elaborate plan like my first greentext story, shit can be pretty painful with a lot of trial and error, and you have to deal with a lot of freaks

continuation on dyke titties:

the way i send pictures of "myself" is actually just taking a snapchat of a picture of a hot girl's body that i have saved on my computer for that purpose

>but user, how the fuck do you not get a shitty picture with all those waves and shit

the key here is to actually focus your camera, and just before it finishes focusing, snap the picture

the blur masks the electronic waves entirely, without sacrificing too much of the quality

about 95% of the time, they dont notice its a fake

...

OR you could not be a beta fuck and use casper to actually send the image files without the pixelation or distortion from a computer sscreen

ive had issues with casper, for some reason it doesnt work on my phone, so i had to make do with what i had

it worked perfectly fine in the end, but it took a lot more work getting the perfect picture

this bitch is ugly tbh but a win is a win

frog face

actually ya i just reinstalled it and i cant get it to login. Ive used it a ton in the past and it worked wonders. Maybe an older version will work

...

this thread is so going to die

...

...