Things you can say about your house, but not your girlfriend

Things you can say about your house, but not your girlfriend

Black people have never been inside my house.

We've got ants!

Well insulated...

My friends tell me before they come into my house

30 years old, time for a remodel.

i have one

It's a fixer upper, but I find it charming.

There's too much grass in the front...

My house is small and comfortable with a reasonably small back yard

It's not the nicest one in the neighborhood but it has a big back porch where I can put my junk.

i have one

I go in through the backdoor every night

everything matches and goes together I guess, but it still sucks

/thread

Just go out back and play in the mud.

It's not a big deal when I decide to come in the back door.

It's never been raped.

it exists.....

you can't beat a house

I rent it out to my buddies every once in a while

It's reliable.

For Sale By Owner

I pay 20k a year for it.

My house isn't a lying cheating crazy whore that's ruined my life and my self-esteem and made me attempt suicide.

The exterior is well worn, but the fixtures and foundation is solid.

it knows when to shut the fuck up

Money well spent

Its rented!

"I want to suck a log of shit out of your asshole"

Alright some great answer. 1000 points to each of you.

Next is giving your date's parents too much information

Wow it's pretty roomy in here!

Nice

Huge cock

Cucks say that to their girlfriends all the time

whoa, whoa, whoa there tiger... we asked for a joke, not your love life

Costs me $1000 a month to sleep in it

I just got some nasty in the bathroom, High five!

"The IQ difference between blacks and whites still exists even when you compensate for their different upbringing. The only other explanation is genetics".

Getting a bit serious there. We're here for comedy friend

Normally I hate niggers, but your daughter put out in the bathroom of the club I met her in the first night we met. So, I guess y'all aren't all bad.

"you guys know where one could purchase meat hook?"

Ok then, seems it wasn't a great choice.

1000 points to for taking one for the team and dating a monkey

Next then, good news then bad news

good news, im replying to your thread
bad news, im only replying to tell you you're a faggot.

you're a faggot

Good news, we managed to save your cat from the fire.
Bad news, we were too late to save your waifu pillow.

Word came out today that the Flint Michigan water crisis will finally be solved with a foolproof solution that will 100% work. Problem is the solution is to turn off all water to Flint Michigan. Back to you Tom

Black people never came inside my house.

good news: aced my test
bad news: test was for HIV

>ftfy
nice

someone screencap that shit

It's a fixer upper.

Alright everyone that it or the show and thanks for playing and have a good night

It does it's job.

It fits a family of four!