What is the most fucked up joke you guys can tell me?

What is the most fucked up joke you guys can tell me?

Why did the chicken cross the road?
>To get to the other side

What do you call 5 black people having sex?

>A threesome

I was once arrested for shooting an unarmed black man

>I was charged with impersonating an officer

I once asked a hotel concierge if the porn was disabled

>he said, it's just regular porn, you sick fuck

What was the terrorist's favorite Ariana Grande song?

>Bang bang

You.

How do pirates know that they are pirates?
>because they arrr.

Lold

edge Lord calm down.

>What do you call 5 black people having sex?
>a threesome

I don't get it.

three fifths compromise, nigga.

Only two things I hate in life.
1. Racists
2. Niggers

look up the 3/5 compromise dog

Black person is 2/3 of a white person. Historical thing from amerifagland

What's red, bloody, and tapping at the window??

The baby in my microwave.

Ok I know the king of all sick jokes, but I've never seen it online (even after googling it) and some things should stay sacred....
....... so quads gets the joke and quints gets the punchline. Bring it cunts.

Why couldn't the pirate play cards?
>Because he was sitting on the deck.

What do you call a black priest?
A holy shit.

...

How do you know when your sister is on her period?

>when your fathers cock tastes like blood

How many black people does it take to do a business deal?

>I don't do business with niggers

What do you call a Buddhist who loves sucking cock?

>The real question is, how did I know you were a Buddhist OP

BONUS: What is a pirates favorite letter of the alphabet? Correct answer will get titties.

Teabird out.

>Why did the Australian cross the road?
To get to the st-

AWW FUCK NOT AGAIN

What's worse than a big pile of dead babies? The love one on the bottom eating is way out. What do you get when that baby comes out of the pile? An erection. What do you call 5 black guys at the KKK meeting? Wind chimes. What do you tell a girl with two black eyes? Nothing you already told her twice. What do you tell a girl with one black eye? Nothing, that bitch listened the first time. Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

My wife caught me having sex with our daughter. I'm not sure what surprised her more, the fact that I was fucking my daughter or the fact that the abortion clinic gave me the fetus.

RRRRRRRRR?

Didn't even have to look it up and cheat.
Tits please.

I disrespect women

Retard. Everyone knows its sea. *C*

His true love is the C

NARRRR, YOU'RE WRONG! IT BE THE 'C' MATEYYYY

niggers are decent contributing members of society

Too late, he fucked it up for you all. Had some nice firm titties in a gif.

I'm sorry user. I just wanted breasts. I tried my best. I guess you put this matter to a rest. I guess I failed; you passed the test. I was the worst - you are the best.

They contribute to the prison population a lot.

Honestly fuck you guys. 'R' is just as funny of an answer. If anything I created my own OC joke.

thinking positive, thats the spirit user

>doesn't get it
>every faggot says R
>you're the joke. you're the OC
kek

It's ok, user. I forgive you. Sorry for calling you a tard. Here is some tits to cheer you up

What did the rabbi pedo say to the kid? Take it easy on the sweets will ya?
Say what you will about pedos at least they slow down driving past schools

Wait so is the joke actually that everyone instinctively says 'r' and then the person that poses the questions reveals that it's 'c'?

That's actually pretty meta. It would appear we've come full circle.

Ooooo! The HIV positive population. Wow you are smart, user!

No it would appear that you're a retard

Thanks user :)

Ever had eithiopian food? Neither have they

Daymn, got more of her?

...

The most fucked up joke of all.
>Men's rights

I bet your life is really fulfilling edging out on Sup Forums all day and calling strangers retards in regards to inquiries about jokes. God speed user.

No problem, Sup Forumsroseph.

what do you call someone who couldn't make money running a casino?

president of the united states

Cant recall. It's from a random folder on my phone that's so old, I can't remeber much about it. I'll look

There was once this single mother who was a camwhore and a lot of us organized here fucked with her. This had been a constant thing. I remember one time she was so mad about the shows constantly being raided and never making money she raged. Then an user ordered a fucking pizza for good measure and she totally lost it. Went on a tirade about how anons ruined her.
She literally said "every dream I've ever had is dead". That was a victory.
These are the keks we used to have user.

What's the difference between a toddler and a pool?
A pool doesn't scream when you go in dry.

>buttpirate detected

Q: What's the best thing about showering with a 4 year old girl?

A: Your cock looks HUUUUUGE in her tiny little hands.

>Haha xd
>Look at my may may arrows

...

What's the worst part about fucking twenty two year olds?

There's twenty of them.

>being this mad from a pirate joke he got wrong

god I love you retards.

Billy Jean is not my lover. The kid is not my son.


Bullshit, Michael Jackson, Billy is a 8 year old boy, Jean is his twin, and we all know they're still chained under Neverland Ranch

A young boy was deep in the woods with a man whining "I'm cold, I'm tired, I'm hungry, I'm scare".

The man replies "you think you've got it bad? I have to come out of these woods all by myself"

>worst
>best

How does the man reply to his own whining?

>so my wife walked in on me fucking our daughter last night. the look on her face was absolutely horrific...although I couldn't tell if it was because I was fucking our daughter, or because the abortion clinic let me keep her.

...

Aye cockmonger, I already said that one

I believe that's it.

Q: what's the best thing about fucking an 11 year old girl?

A: If you hit it from the back, It looks like a nine year old boy.

These jokes are offending my wife's black boyfriend's son.

Statistically, one out of two people enjoy ass rape.

Statistically 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape

Okay, I'll bite

The one out of two that didn't enjoy getting ass-raped tried biting to get away. It didn't work cuz they just got punched in the throat.

whatever you do in life, your parents will be proud of you as long as you're happy.

thank you

No he didn't. I bit him and he got very angry and kicked my ass, but I never got raped like he wanted to so jokes on you!

Black Lives Matter, SJWs, and ANTIFA really have it figured out.

What do children with artificial limbs play?

>Becoming transformers

A: Nice dubs
B: As far as you know. Choose a good thing people don't remember what happens to their vulnerable bodies while they sleep. Gotta love chloroform

No he didn't. Just forced himself onto me at a party

We must be talking about different things. I was never at a party. Too unloved, unwanted and friendless to be invited to any. I wonder why you wouldn't remember when you were asleep tho. (Check your logic)

I heard some squelching noises, so I walked into my sister's room.

She was masturbating with a banana.

I said "Hey! I was gonna eat that! Now it'll taste like bananas!"

If only Africa had more mosquito nets,
Then every year, we could save millions
Of mosquitos dying needlessly of AIDS

-- Jimmy Carr

OK I hate pedos I heard this disgusting joke on a party line over 10 years ago some wetback from California said it.

How do you make a little girl cry twice? Wipe your bloody cock on her teddy bear.


Has to be the most unfunny disturbing joke I've ever heard.

3/5th's*

>why are you even here

How do you know it's bedtime at Neverland Ranch?

>When the big hand touches the little hand

The joke is not entirely a joke, more of a prank, but here goes.
After living this shitty existence suffering through each day, the Buddha was right and you get to go through it all again thanks to reincarnation.

73.8% Of statistics are made up on the spot. . .

...

Anne Frank walks by Hitler, Hitler whistles and says, damn bitch what's cookin? What does Anne say back? Anne Frank says, My family.