So yeah anons

So yeah anons.
I've got paranoid schizophrenia.
All of my friends left me, my gf did this too. I can't even work normally, because i'm working in school. Broke as fuck, living in parents addict without any future.
Also parents are going on holidays to usa leaving me alone for about 2 weeks. They don't know that i'm having suicidal thoughs.
I'm addicted to painkillers (paracetamol for social pain) and others to chill. My eyes are yellow.
Going to kill myself from overdose, and if pain will be high enough, then slit wrists.
Any user can relate to this? Is there any way to fight with this?
Also i've been in hospital for mentaly ill, but lied them that i am okay.
Pic not related.
Had to take this out

dont do it user

>paracetamol for social pain

how the FUCK are you addicted to tylenol?

i hope to hell you mean the codeine in the mixed pills

...

Why?

Taking about 6-7g everyday from 2 years, after that time you will be addicted to everything.

i've been in rehab 2 times for painkillers and hardcore drugs (cocaine mostly) just like you and have suicidal thoughts regularly. the only reason i dont do it is because of how my family would react seeing my limp lifeless body on the floor.

Holy shit user
Then you are living in this spot where you won't do it and suffer.
I feel sorry for you

i dont feel bad for myself. its my fault that i got involved in this kind of shit. im hoping that i can get better but my relationship with my family is the only thing that keeps me living, even though i don't see them much.

paracetamol isnt addictive though. not physically anyway, and it has no psychoactive effects

i used to have a nasty oxy/heroin/meth habit. kratom made it pretty easy to stay clean. havent even thought about using in 4 years, and a kilo of kratom for $75 lasts me a full month.

you should give kratom a try if its legal in your area

No it's not.
Cutted ties with everyone who can sell this in my area. Also every drug makes me more paranoid, so i'd rather not taking that kind of stuff.

look at that batmen photograph.

see how hes pointing to his eyes and smirking with almost a sign of acknowledgement. like he knows something. something you might've done a long long time ago.

but the smile indicates approval.

drink your coffee OP! DO IT.

>my eyes are yellow
your liver is working to hard, lay off the drugs

you're prob like 16-23 , I'm assuming ... this is common at this age, you'll get over it once you're in your 30s... simple advice, is there something you love or enjoy start paving the way towards that, just try thats like 70% of fuckign success right there... personally.. im 27 and i know i should do this... but I do the minimun... i just drive for uber and make enough to pay the insurance and gas and rent... i still live with my mom and sleep on the couch... i have a qt 7 or 8./10 gf... somehow... i think i was just at the right place at the right time... shes nice af... sometimes i think to myself ... "wtf am i doing wasting my fucking life, day by day. 0 motivation, i need to do something with my life" i think i know deep down that if i try to pursue something it will happen, its a part of life, you need to have the journey... and you'll encounter nice ppl and bad ppl on the way... i been through my fair share of heart breaks.. but it goes away... and sometimes you find a QT 9/10 thats into you... dont give up bruh... just do the quests that we need to do in real life, unless you'lre too lazy... i mean tbh killing yourself is the laziest way out you can go, bruh bruh, you know that and i know that

attic* you stupid fuck

already done that while fapping

There's only one way to end this pain... you know. Otherwise your problem is just attention.

Yeah, also have 50k of debt because i was afraid of going to private school, wich my parents don't know.
Tried that a lot of times. I mean motivation shot appeard, but after that it gets worse - people joking about me, because i'm a loser.
also i'm 21

sry, i'm not strongly into english mate

bro, you're young AF... you aren't a loser... you have time to change yourself... you have chance to change your situation, come on man... i think im a loser tbh.. 27 still living with my mom lmao and doing the minimum... maybe i just like living a simple life... come on bruh, pick yourself up.. you got plenty of fucking time to get a job and get a different perspective.. i knew you were around that age brotha... just get a job man.. tell em you want to try it out

Family is rich as fuck, and me working for minimum wage is just disappointing for them.

so why is your family rich AF but you can get a loan? Make a business plan and get a loan if they say no rob em don't off urself first

I'll just leave this here. You're welcome.

lmao who cares... its your life, find your own way... and maybe you'll be more in tune with who the fuck you really are

I mean, i wouldnt understand how anybody would feel dissapointed in their son for earning minimun wage... I'm assuming your family wasn't automatically born rich... they worked for it... through sweat and fuckign tears bro.... and now maybe you have been given everything... and maybe you need to be in a situation where you have nothing... to be more humbled with who you are and with other people, and maybe then you'll find a meaning in your life... instead of the current life you are living.

basically I had the same issue, except for med addiction, mine was alcohol, tried to kms a few times, but i'm treating myself with therapy and psychiatry, I'm not "well" but at least functioning sorta like a normal human being. There is hope user, seek help

At least you have an Adam West Batman coffee mug.

Make an appointment with a psychiatrist. Stay on meds.

Face the void head on, using dope to dull is for cowards. Don't off yourself, before trying whatever your dreams are. And who needs other people, you have a world of problems to fix internally before them. Good luck.

Thanks anons for cheering me up and motivation.
I'll try to do something with it like you said.
>find your way of your life
>go to psychiatrist
>there are people in worse situation than you are