Alcoholism : Specific thoughts you have durring the day

Alcoholism : Specific thoughts you have durring the day.

For example ,
I drink daily. After work I have 4 ounces of tequilla, two strongbow, and then I go home and drink like a litre and a half of wine. Everyday.
On weekends its more.
Anyway. Mixing gives you a decent hang over, no matter how often you do it so sometimes I throw up.

Yesterday my GF and I were grocery shopping and I knew I was gonna puke, so I kiss her on the cheek and say, " gotta pee. Be right back".

Enter the disgusting Safeway bathroom, where I hurl that thick yellow bile and a little blood into the diseased toilet until I see those little twinkes of light in my peripherals.

Then I stand up straight, pop a mint, wash my hands and go back once the redness in my eyes has subsided.

Rejoin the girl where she says, "Good call. I didnt even think about it but Im gonna go do what you just did. Haha"

Sorry Nicole.
I know thats not true.

What made you slip into alcoholism?

>work from 7-15
>go to store to buy 24 pack of beer
>enjoy night myself at home
>wake up feeling like shit to go to work
rinse an repeat

Functioning alcoholic/drug addict here.

I drink a few shots of Jack before work, then take 3 100mg tramadol before work. At work I'll take another few shots of Jack and smoke weed. Then at night I drink between 25 - 40 oz of Jack or Grey Goose. Don't enjoy any of it, but can still take a few days off every now and then.

You're not too deep to end it OP

Who fuckin' knows.

Trama, geneticly dispositioned, zero impulse control.

*shrug*

Havent had a sober day in years.
Never had the DTs?

If you don't enjoy any of it, why do you keep doing it? So you don't start withdrawing?

Sucks man. You want to stop, I take it?

Tequilla? Strongbow? Wine?

You must be fat as fuck. I drink 8-10 shots of Svedka a day and eat very little and im 210lbs (i spend my off time gaming). You consume over 2500 calories in alcohol alone a day. Switch to liquor. Svedka is the cheapest vodka i've found that rarely gives a hangover. Mix with shit like crystal light and you're golden and save a ton of cash

25 to 40 oz of liquor a night? And the expensive shit. How the fuck do you survive / afford that?

I love it when people say "you seem a little tired today"

When inside I can feel my kidneys ache, fighting of constant nausea, light hurts....I can FEEL how high my blood pressure is, I swear Im on the verge of a cardiac eppisode...

But I smirk and say, "Nah. Im good. Just a shitty sleep. Its the WORST right?!"

Nah man. You dont even fucking know.

Not op but starting to drink whisky was my biggest mistake.
I like beer but i don't get addicted to it, whisky however, i crave that shit

I would love to stop. Dont see it happening

Less than a couple times I can remember, I'm about six years in. I compensate with benzo's, opiates and weed. Most of the time I'll take them when I'm a few hours into the day, feeling fine. I know they're not coming but use them as a way to justify the other shit. I know deep down I'm just digging deeper because I know I can.

How many years since you been sober? Do you work? How much you drinking?

I work in 4 hours and I'm downing a fifth to try to fall back asleep. Damn boss called me in the middle of my sleep time (i work overnight) so sleeping is shot to shit.

Nope. Super physical job keeps me pretty trim.

Got a moderately decent job.

I've got a masters in psychology and work with suicidal kids.... i could never afford that lifestyle

Work full time at a decently active job.
Been an alcoholic for about 10 years.
Posted consumption above.
I dont mix though.
That would put me over the edge for sure.
Not like, kill me, but I'd stop working.

Currently functional. If Im gonna be an addict Ill be a functional one.

It's not about withdrawals, I'm just afraid of living sober, I guess.

I work in a major city, in banking. I get paid enough for my shit to seem like it's no big deal, financially. Though it's taking the kind of money I'd have killed for just three years ago.

Completely off topic, but how difficult was it to get your master's?

All that sugar filled booze... just cant imagine trying to do anything physically demanding after a night of all that

slow self destruction,booze also messes with b vitamin absorption,
a tooth or 3 fall out after ten years or so,leading to more bone loss,jaw shrinkage,neglect of choppers leads to dental disease infections you don;t know are there
,liver damage,upchucking food and stomach acid when you are insensible.
dirty house unpaid bills,car repoed,broad bails out,2 months no pay rent,,out to the street,and on,and on andon andonn,and on andon andonn,and on andon andonn,and on andon andonn,and on andon andon ,and on and on andon,and on andon andon,and on andon and on,and on andon andon

In what country though?

I feel that second comment reaaal hard man.

The things I could do with the money I make...

A masters takes dedication but I have a knack for the field. I managed to pull it off while I had a full time job and I feel it was worth it but I would get paid more if I said fuck it and got some IT certs sadly

USA

Congrats on making 10 years through this shit, that's something special. Ever tried to get out? How much do others know of your situation?

Weird how we always label this kind of shit though, right? I like to describe myself as a functional addict - even take pride in it. Fucked

I live in Canada.
Every 6 months I go to a dentist who cleans and whitens and checks my teeth FOR FREE.

That's the thing that hurts me more than other, man. Comfortability kills innovation. I feel pathetic for not being able to come anywhere near the person I though I'd be when I had money. One day, though. Just probably not really

It is shitty that when you hear of other "alcoholics" its always an abusive or irresponsible asshole. Never the functioning ones who do their job, pay the bills, and attend all their kid's activities. Just because you drink daily doesnt mean you cant do what you should

Theres the problem.

Good on you, man. I've got my BS but don't know if I have the dedication to go for a master's. Then again, I don't know if I have the dedication for anything, really.

Fucking this. Getting into a comfortable routine/having a decent paying job kills all drive to make major changes to improve yourself.

People know I drink more than average, but i make it out like its not a problem.

Ive tried to quit several times... Rehab, hospital stays... Give it a few weeks and Im back at it.

If its a field you're passionate about and will make you feel like you matter, it may be worth the extra mile. I'm damn good at my job but get paid $39k which is shit. I could have a soul-less job in IT making more than double that in 4 years time.. buy a house and all the booze i want. I dont know what to do... and at this point I feel I shoildnt start a family... drinking too damn much for 7 years straight. I'll be dead before my kid hits 18

When you go to a liquore store every day and you know the regular clerks by name and you know they think youre a fucking disaster.

It doesn't, but it does mean you have dependance to something other than what you should. I get where people are coming from. Plus the road so rarely ends in anything other than shit for 99% of dependants.

I guess I'm trying to say that we can be more than we are, people see that. It's just annoying when retarded people - who are more consumed by their prejudice and stupidity than their understanding- say it

So get some help bucko

Jesus christ. I'm in a grey collar job that required little training and I'm making $30k, full benefits and yearly raises.
If you can kick the drinking, you could have that family and house like you want. It's not too late for you, user. But I know how hard it is to stop.

My life but I don't drink up to 24 beers in a night!

That's the issue with booze being the legal/social drug. Do you tell yourself it's not a problem?You're the only part of the equation here that heeds any outcome, afterall

I'm borderline but I can control it.....I just choose not to.
I started drinking to make to crazy thoughts in my head go away.....it works but over time I needed more alcohol (obviously)
Since last week I've been trying to get into a good mental state by eating well and drinking lots of water.
I was drinking 1/2 pint - pint of whisky every day. Most times with gin or beer as a starter.
Now I have maybe 1 beer and 3 shits of whisky a day.

>bucko

Kek

Lol shits?
Where the fuck is spellcheck when you need it!?!?!?
*shots

Ive been drinking so often. I try to give myself "drink nights". But rarely keep to the plan. Im not full blown stay -drunk-all-day...but ive on half pints and a couple beers a night. Got a dui. which is honestly a good thing. The breathalyzer in my car forces me to control it. But im getting to the point that id rather drink than do other things. And wether im watching a movie playing a game etc. I want booze.

What kind of crazy thoughts, shit shot? I find the booze just makes me ignore the sane thoughts that are preventing me from 'success'

Me, bit of a youngin only 21. Started when I was 17, used to drink around half a handle to about a third a night. Now I'm on blood pressure meds and trying to slow down a bit. But I still get outta control a lot. Drank for almost 2 years straight when I started. Being sober felt way better. But being drunk is a hard cycle. Like you think, I'll be so bored tonight if I don't drink so I guess I will.


Word of advice: Yes you have high blood pressure if you're a drunk.

I'm 22, studying comp sci in college, last time I was in my uni apartment alone I drank 3 liters of beer and 1 liter of gin in 3 days. Is it too much? I am drinking right now, I think i'm addicted to it.

I often think about raping/killing/molesting people.
I'm not sure where the fuck it comes from. I think I just got too addicted to porn.

Mixing definetly gives more of a hangover. Usually i just get drunk and pass out on alot of beer but as last night mixed a Four Loko in with some little liquor bottle like from the Airplane. Could hardly stay asleep without going and chunking that yellow shit like you describe.
Everytime I try and hydrate myself like drink water too in the morning I usually end up using it as more liquid to throw up with

me

thats insane, OP

threads like these remind me that i'm probably not an alcoholic. i drink a shit ton but only on Fridays, Saturdays and sometimes Sundays. i literally have 0 alcohol Mon-Thursday

does anyone else get this weird tingling in their feet/hands the night after heavy drinking? it's fucking annoying. is this just part of every hangover now?

i should probably stop finishing 18 packs by myself

why not buy more booze at once or go to a supermarket, that shit makes no sense

you're not an alcoholic, you have to be pretty dumb to think that, but maybe if you keep it up you will be one, that is how I started

Not sure if you're being serious.

If you are, I'd say see a specialist. Probably don't mention your reasons for seeing them, but find a median proxy. I thought about rape after shit loads of porn, but there was always a clear distinction in my mind between reality and fantasy.

Is the killing part of the sexuality to you?

this

I have chronic liver pain went to the doctor got ultrasound liver and kidneys were h. Any thoughts on this phenomena anons?

That was my life about 4 years ago. God damn I don't miss it. I hope everything gets better mate

Liquor is the last stop

*whew* i guess not. thanks lad

>maybe if you keep it up you will be one

i'm a musician. i think it's a natural progression (no pun) tbh

I was an alcoholic from 18 to 25. 7 months sober now.

I drank about half a handle of vodka a day or 20+ shots if you want to look at it that way.

For my job I had to travel all over the east coast, so I spent about 5 nights a week in motel rooms drinking until I blacked out.

My wake up call was when I realized I had the store hours memorized for multiple liquor stores in 6 different states and I would regularly plan my weekly trips so that I would hit liquor stores at the right times. Maryland and New Jersey especially, the liquor laws are different county by county.

One night I blacked out and threw up on myself in my sleep. When I woke up I had 36 missed calls from my gf. She called the police but she couldn't even tell them what state I was in.

Nigga you drink too much

>I drank about half a handle of vodka a day or 20+ shots if you want to look at it that way.
what is that in liters

I've been good this week about not drinking. I'm tired of doing a six pack a night plus whatever hard a is left around. Today I've slipped, but tomorrow is a new day and I'll keep myself in check.

I'm tired of going to sleep nauseous and waking up feeling like death warmed over. I'm tired of feeling like shit all day until I go home and drink again.

>threw up on myself in my sleep

you could've killed yourself, lad

As an 18 y/o drinking about up to 10 beers a day to cope with my depression and family issues, Threads like these remind me that my problems are so miniscule compared to the struggle of others specifically hard alcoholics. When i read posts above like drinking 25-40oz of liquor a night ontop of strongbow it makes my "drinking problem" feel so insignificant. But I know I still Have a problem, just not one so developed.
Started smoking cigs @ 13, drinking @ 15, genetically predisposed to both, my mom probably smoked and drank ith me fuckin in her

Day 3 sober, want to kill myself

a handle is 1.75 L. so half of that is 875 milliliters

if you didnt know that why are you in this thread lmao

Jesus I remember exactly how that feels. One of the main reasons I quit was the anxiety I would feel the day after. Even if I didn't do anything sketchy the night before, my anxiety would be through the fucking roof

0.85ish

A full handle is 1.75 liters, so I did a little over half of that a day

I struggled with cocaine addiction for many years. It fucking sucks and I imagine alcoholism does too. But i never had a problem with drinking. I can have 2 beers and call it a night but even a tiny bump of coke and i wont stop until the sun comes up.

maybe because I live in europe and english is not my first language. you americans think you're the only ones here.

>genetically predisposed to both

is this real or just a meme. i come from a long line of alcoholics and i was told the same thing

the heart pounding, nightmares, and sweats are what get me. Damn that shit sucks. Good luck bro

yeah scary stuff. I'm lucky I'm a belly sleeper or I'd probably have died

you got me, i didn't consider that you could've been a yuro, i thought you were underage or something

pretty much everyone in the US, especially alcoholics, know that a "handle" is 1.75L

cheers

Haven't slept in 3 days either, hot and cold spells, throwing up, no appetite, head ache, the hollow pit in the chest feeling.....yea, all of it

The sweating out of every pore in your body while cold is the worst I think

Some states don't sell liquor in the supermarket dummy

>I can control it

Keep telling yourself that mate

>blood pressure meds

At 21? Really? Lol

"were h" ????

My uncle started taking them in elementary school.

It's good you're able to admit you have a problem already, some people don't even make it to that step.

Just know it usually gets worse with time, so please try to quit as soon as you can.

I'm this guy and becoming an alcoholic really fucked up my life. I lost my job, my gf, most of my friends etc. Putting things back together now, but best to avoid that tumble if you can.

No, the wanting to kill feels very real. I live in Japan and these guys are cunts. I'm surrounded by them. My wife is one and she's a cunt. We live with her family they are also cunts.
I was playing with my son yesterday and my wife's grandma in her 90s was telling the whole family I was being dangerous. When no one was looking I flipped her the bird. Then I gave her an angry look and shook my head. Fucking hate the cunt.

its real m8. thats what "coming from a long line of alcoholics" is. Being genetically predisposed to Alcoholism. Its in our blood. Ontop of that Im also liable to get pancreactic cancer at any given moment

Where are you from? Why did you go to Japan?

Alchololic of 15 years. Its gonna kill me I know. But the damn thing still whispers in my ear ever time I'm sober. Out of interest Anyone tried the twelve steps?

If your a fucking drunk and overweight yeah dude.

you married a nip, moved into her nip family's house, and had a hapa kid?

nigger what? did you seriously go full weaboo. japan is xenophobic as fuck and everyone hates you because you're a white piggu. her family hates you for marrying her and having a hapa child

Dude what

yeah not really.

if you're white you're fine.

they don't really like other Asians.

100% real. It's sad but some people (myself included) are literally born alcoholic. It's no excuse but it's def real

I can control the drinking just not the thoughts.
I didn't realise I was fucked up until recently. Before I started drinking I was a recluse with severe anxiety issues. I'd like to find a good middle ground but I doubt it's possible coz I don't want to take any medication from the Dr. Plus I live in Japan so it's impossible to find an English speaking Dr. Also, Japanese people are awful at dealing with mental issues

Thank God for a Puritan upbringing. I feel too much shame to purchase alcohol for myself. Otherwise I would be an alcoholic.

>puritan

How does it feel to know you'll be a freak your whole life? I'd rather be an alcohol

killing myself slowly with booze. liver and kidneys hurt every day. just want it to be over tbh. please let me die in my sleep

that's not how it works you retard

>surrounded by japanese qts

living the dream

;-;

Ily user