Has anybody else here suffered with horrible intrusive thoughts? Violent, sexual, or otherwise...

Has anybody else here suffered with horrible intrusive thoughts? Violent, sexual, or otherwise? I get them from time to time, and they drive me crazy because they're always extremely gross or inappropriate, and thats not who I am. I had an intrusive sexual thought about one of my best friends recently, and it was disgusting but I couldn't get it out of my head. I'm not attracted to this person in any way, and I'm not sure where it came from, but it made me feel really gross.
>pic related was pretty much my reaction

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Yes, I get them sometimes. The best thing you can do is remind yourself that they're not you. The reason they disgust you is because they're so foreign to you. Identify them as intrusive, and let them go. Dwelling on them has made me physically ill in the past. Don't think about them too much. They don't mean anything about you as a person.

I thought I was the only one who recognized intrusive thoughts. I know the feel--- Literally goes down to '10 Points if yoou hit them' while driving in a car, some people still think it but dont say shit... Humans are weird.

Legit though- Me too- "Worry yourself sick" Comes to mind.

This site doesnt make those thoughts any better.

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OP here. I had one about one of my closest friends, who is the same gender as me, and I'm not even gay. This person is also kind of a gross slob, but they have a great personality. My point is that they're not physically attractive to me in any way. Its like my brain picked the least attractive person it could think of. The thought of doing anything with them is disgusting to me.

This
Its a treatable and manageable thing

Dont worry about it too much. Taboo subjects are always against the grain of thought. Might be your body warning you about something. Taboo things are natural- and naturally weird. Think about this though-
>Whats disgusting to you isnt the same to someone else
>You've had an intrusive thought that you pursued before
>People would definitely think its gross.

I suffer from this too. It makes me throw up sometimes. The only time I feel okay is when I'm sleeping.

yes op, very fucking frequently.
i was writing a nixer, a story for a city wide newspaper, and sudden misanthropic rage flooded through me.
i mean i went from a stream of angles, ideas, to listing specific arseholes i'd favour annihation.

I've had similar thoughts about family. Its fucking awful because they're disgusting thoughts, and sometimes I keep thinking about them and can't get then out of my head, even though I hate them. I start wondering if they're real.

Bumping to hear more user's stories. This actually really helps.

Anybody else?

I'd reflect on the media you are consuming my bro cos it seems like your subconscious is evoking shit for whatever reason, maybe dopamine addiction?

Yes I do.
>pic related was pretty much MY reaction too

It's fucking scary, isn't it? I've had feelings about people I'm not attracted to in any way at all, and I'm worried that it will ruin my relationships with them. It's like my brain chooses the least attractive, most inappropriate people to think about.

I just wanted to post that webm since it's the same guy.
I'm not edgy enough to have brutal rape/murder/whatever fantasies.

They're not fantasies. They're things that I hate. That's what makes them intrusive, mate. They're unwanted thoughts.

I think this relates

>be me
>had PTSD since I was a child, basically my whole life
>diagnosed at 20 years old
>always think to myself "Why don't I kill myself?" whenever I remember a painful of embarrassing memory
>"manually" replace it with "Why don't I love myself?"
>helps tremendously

Wow, you too? Do you think this could be linked with anxiety?

Absolutely. It makes me so anxious that I throw up sometimes.

Anxiety and GI problems are closely linked.

Woah,

>Be me.
>Every morning I wake up
>First few thoughts.
>Why dont I just kill myself?
>Im not really suicidal
>Intrusive thoughts

Smoke weed everyday, boys.

Good to meet you, I thought I was the only one with this specifically problem. But, then again, I recognize that I get it from my mom (most likely)who has done the exact same thing, out loud, in front of my in my formative years.

I also know that I'm in for a bad day when it's my very first goddamn thought in the morning. And I've never had the slightest intention of hurting myself, either.

>best friend

dude that's nothing I have sick disgusting thoughts about family. rape and murder and incest.

Yeah, I think it's natural if you've been exposed to nasty shit like some things on here. I have horrible violent dreams too where I cant control the outcome as well. But the thoughts I have when I'm conscious disturb me because I'm awake yet having these fucked up thoughts where no control is to be had. It's a double edge sword. lose lose. fml tbh

not OP but we shouldn't make this a contest, but I definitely understand why that would disturb you

Hang in there. This site is awful for kys statements.

For me, it's an inappropriate thought about an inappropriate person like a family member, or somebody that I'm not even attracted to. My internal dialogue with myself is like this.
>Hey, why don't you fuck _____?
>No, that's disgusting.
>You thought of it, didn't you?
>Yeah, but its intrusive. I don't want to think of it.
>Well, it must be somewhere in your subconscious, or else you wouldn't think of it.

I do, but it sometimes seems to make it worse. Doesn't stop me though ;)

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It's a trait of evolution. The thoughts have been programmed into your mind to remind you of what is right and wrong, and who you are. In past societies doing some of those things could get you killed. They're more normal than you think.

This. Weed makes it so much worse for me. I've stopped all together.

You need the right strain my fellow. Indica Or Sativa. Know your strands. Sativa I would suggest if you need to focus (Probably not amazing for anxiety).------> Indica- Mellow out. *In da couch*

Maybe try edibles. People usually trip at the smoking and coughing part.

I'm not in a legal state, so I just smoke whatever my guy's got. Been smoking for 5 years now and never once given sativa/indica a thought or care. Maybe you're right.

when I smoke weed I have to be alone and really comfy or I'll have a fucking anxiety attack. I can't be around people when I'm high. social interaction is sometimes too much to handle when I'm sober. weed just intensifies that anxiety 10x

Don't get stressed about it - imagination is a fickle thing that you can't have full control over - if it really bothers you my suggestion is to take a break from Sup Forums (oversaturation of something doesn't really help you to ignore/forget it)
Take it easy Sup Forumsro!

or nah because that shit is terrifying when a bunch of thc hits you suddenly all at once. at least when you smoke you know how high you're getting. I usually take two bong rips and I'm good. sometimes just one

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I know the feels. Maybe when it gets around more- It'll be better. smoking the backyard shit isnt always awesome. Some people dont know what the fuck they're doing.

Holy shit. I thought I was the only one who had this type of dialogue.

32 and just off meds after 4 years. intrusive thoughts are a big factor in what flipped me into psychosis. i wont go into detail but i have kids who i love incredibly and every time i would try to relax all i could see was gore. anxiety meds helped alot... off now for going on 2 weeks because want to make glorious cums again. trying not to let self sabotage reign again. minds r fukt mang.

youtube.com/watch?v=_duiUXwG_hE

I'm so sorry, user. I'm pretty young and I'm scared that this will effect the rest of my life.

I know
>Kids have intrusive thoughts
>Worst nightmare
>pic related

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Every fucking day, especially at work.

CHEEEEEEEECKKKKED

THIS, but I think the only reason I don't have them at home is because I can sleep at home. I feel safe when I sleep.

It will. It never goes away. Its all about perspective. You have those thoughts (Intrusive ones) More frequently than you realize. Just some you find disturbing.

>Why don't I love myself
Let me count the ways...

youtube.com/watch?v=-zCtBLeBT7I

Don't overthink it too much, if that's possible. It happens to plenty of people. Just remind yourself that it's normal to have stupid thoughts on occasion and it means nothing. Also, I agree with others about this place probably exacerbating the issue.

youtube.com/watch?v=rnS-05XoXs4

youtube.com/watch?v=_m1EOPqM9x0

sounds like you need an exorcist.

a true one, that is, a traditional Roman Catholic priest

I don't come here often. I came here because there was nowhere else to talk about this shit without being judged. I mostly frequent other boards, but I haven't been on this one in years.

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Who the fuk R U

Every time I'm in a car on the high way I suddenly get hit with the urge to just open the door and jump out. I'm not suicidal though wtf and I get scared because it feels like something is gunna come over me and I'm actually gunna do it

I get this too, except I get the urge to let go of the wheel and drift into oncoming traffic. Its terrifying.

Look/sound familiar?

That makes sense, the anonymity here is useful. For what it's worth, it should be clear that plenty of others (including myself from time to time) share your experience. All I can say is try to not give passing thoughts too much power.

No idea what that is. Sorta reminds me of the crack fox from Mighty Boosh though (pic related)

Well-
>If your mind was a window that could be help/seen
>Any intrusive thoughts would have the smallest repercussion
>Doctors would put us all in a padded room
>Tell you to take your pills
>Anti psycosis
>Anti depressants
>Anti anxiety
Who ever judges you and it stays with your brain is someone you care about. opnion wise.

Hey I was having severe panic / anxiety attacks, like, was totally unable to deal with any kind of problem that required me to make a decision. So, I got myself some benzos and lots of weed, now I'm a stoner I believe, and I smoke that kush errday, but I go easy on the benzos y'know, only one whenever I truly feel like shit. I don't mix tho, only if I want to super chill on a Sunday. If I'm having problems overthinking, I vape some of that fine herb, or maybe I take a few tokes from a wooden hobbit pipe, makes me feel awesome. If I'm with my pothead friends, we roll some joints. If I'm having a severe attack, I drop a benzo, and let it act for an hour or so, once I chill and I realize life is meaningless and so are my problems, I proceed to work on my assignments, or to make some music / play some vidya, go for a walk, anything. After I settle, I smoke the kush again and I drop like the biggest bass. Also try LSD, it will enlight the shit out of you, you will become TAO itself. Unless you're a normie, which leads me to the thought that maybe LSD is a normie test kit. Get your weed faggot, see ya round.

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Bumping for more help.

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Bump

What are you struggling with, user?

I have pretty bad OCD and I've always stuggled with this. I used to be pretty distraught with it as a kid. Used to be sat in the classroom and an image of close people dying would pop up. It happens now too all kinds usually related to sex and death. I've become pretty depressed lately and this maybe one of the reason.If anyone has successfully beaten this pls share how

Depressive thoughts can be a cycle. Changing one word in your sentances can make the difference to break it. Mind you- You'd have to be hopped up on pills or dead to think life sunshine and rain bows all the time. Humans are inherently violent- death is our culture... look at Disney for fuck sakes... Sex is a natural primal urge holms.

Mine causes me to skip meals. I get so anxious that I throw up, so I avoid eating because I'm not sure if I'll be able to hold it down. As a result, I feel weak and dizzy all the time, and my anxiety worsens. I can only eat at night before bed.

Jeez, you should get checked.. or learn some breathing techniques. OR SMOKE WEED EVERYDAY

I'm not a violent person, but whenever I see a homeless person sitting there being useless I get an urge to beat them to death with my umbrella.

This is a little off subject, but does any user have the directions for supplements to take for giant cums? I saw it on here a couple times and want to try it. It was like 4 supplements...

Yes user you need to get high.

It's called 'pure OCD' and is pretty common.

I used to smoke weed often. I feel like drugs caused this in me.

Ah. Tough spot to be on user. Good luck.

I think most people have them from time to time. They're just more common in some people. I think it's a symptom of OCD. The fact that you are repulsed by them shows that you know inside that you're not a bad person though.

I used to smoke all the time, and I enjoyed it, but then these crazy thoughts started happening and they worsen when I'm high, so I've stopped. I hate myself for trying it in the first place. I'm not against weed. It was a lot of fun before I started having these thoughts and I'm glad that so many people can smoke it and be fine, but its not for me anymore.

It happens to me when I'm busy at work when in alone putting things together for the next day. Busy work I call it. Real easy stuff todo but it's reptile and simple so my mind blanks out and ever once in a while the bad thoughts sink in. But as soon as it dose I shut it out with "grunts and yelps"

Like
>I'm going to kill that dumb-
Ah blah blah!

You allergic to anything?
>Bubbleboy

Everyone gets them OP. The harder you try to ignore them, the worse they'll torment you. You need to work through them in your mind. I know it sounds cliche, but try writing them down on a piece of paper and burning it.

If you're looking at something to blame it on, dont blame it on things you can take to make it better. Pills are the same way. I had anxiety. Still kinda do, but the pills never sat in my stomach. Ever.. Wasnt the pills. just the body reacting. I could blame the pills for making me throw up- it was just rejection. I tried it. Found it didnt work for me. Different than blaming the pills. A lot of what I learned is its literally breathing man. Breathing techniques. Meditation. Walks. BREATH NIGGA BREATH

If you get a thought like "I wish ____ would fuck me in my ass" and you KNOW you're straight, and the thought is disgusting to you, just write it off as a gross random thought. The same as "I wish I could eat shit right now" or some other disgusting thing. You don't really want it. Your brain is sending you a disgusting thought to see how you'll respond. If you're disgusted by it, you're probably in the clear. Your brain does this often, as a sort of test, to make sure its still functioning properly. Write it off as gross and random and don't dwell on it.

>tfw even your own brain fucks with you

It's pretty scary because you don't know if its real or not. I had it happen with homosexual thoughts once when I was like 26 after drinking a lot. I was scared that I was turning gay or something, but I told myself that's ridiculous. I had to remind myself that if I was gay, I would have known way before I was 26, and it wouldn't feel disgusting or uncomfortable. It would feel natural, just like being straight. They were intrusive as fuck, and they were disgusting to me, but I eventually got over it.

That sounds terrifying tbh.

That actually worked for me. It makes me significantly lazier, but I'm kind of a spaz anyway. It balances me out.

I fear that it'll ruin my friendship with this person. I don't know how to make them stop, and I don't know why my intrusive thoughts are fixated on this one person.

It will if you let it. You've got to cut that shit out.

>when all the gore, CP, and trap threads gave you PTSD

That advice was pretty solid. Let the thought happen, but then tell yourself "wow, that was fucked up."
Accept that it happens, remember that it's bad, and then just move on to the next thought. Fighting the thought in the first place is part of this compulsive cycle.

Get out.