Hi Sup Forums I need some serious advice

Hi Sup Forums I need some serious advice.
A little about me first, I'm 42, I live in Arkansas, I work as a car mechanic, and life has been shit for me I'll tell you what. I work 45 hours a week. At home its hell, I've been married to for 7 years, my wife has become a control freak. I used to be able to go out with the guys on Fridays for some beer, but if I do she throws a hissy fit when I come back, after work I expect dinner when I come home, she refuses to make me any. When she gets angry at me for not taking the kids to soccer practice, or to summer school she bicthes, and hits me in the face. And I can't do shit cause I know I'll be arrested if I do anything back, and on top of that I've had blue balls for about 6 months now, and she has refused to be intimate with me, so I figure hell might as well go get something relaxing- thats when I found these erotic massage places, I feel I need it so bad, I want a fucking happy ending but I'm getting cold feet about it, I plan on going this weekend while she and the kids are over with the in-laws. I have the money ready, and I know where the parlor is. But I'm afraid I might be caught cheating since this will be my 1st time going to a place like this. So Sup Forums should I go to a massage parlor? Any tips, or rules be aware of? And Sup Forums what are some of your most recent massage parlor experiences?

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Just fucking tell her, faggot. If you pay for a hand job though, I hope she kicks your ass.

Bump to help a fellow mechanic bro. No advice though m90.

Man, talk to your fucking wife.

Second, Rubmaps. There isn't much to it. Get in there for a massage, get naked, get on the bed, get your junk massage, and when she starts inching toward your dick, cum all over.

But talk to your fucking wife. Sounds like counseling may be in order. Fuck being unhappy because you're too pussy to try to fix the shit in your life that's a shit.

OP here. Gotta be honest man, I'm thinking of getting a divorce, but I also want whats best for my annoying kids.

Gotta a quick question on HE massage prices, what is the recommended tip price?

This guys got all the necessary info for you. I've gone to a few of these places. Sometimes its pretty great, if the girl is hot and can fool you into thinking she's into it, other times it's lame and depressing. Be prepared for the second outcome.

But yeah, talk to your wife, it's probably time for a divorce. It might seem impossible but it's not, and you'll probably all be happier in the end.

You're not looking at the bigger perspective, dude. If you're unhappy, fucking tell your wife. She's there to make you happy, and if she doesn't, get the fuck out! We all like to get brainwashed by our friends and society, thinking there's no way out of a miserable situation just because you're married or have kids. Talk to her, tell her EXACTLY word for word how you feel, just like you wrote here (except for the massage part), and if she reacts well, good, you stopped being a pussy and sorted it out. If not, tell her you're leaving her, get the paperwork ready, fuck off and be happy. Go nuts. Go listen to a song called Walt Grace's Submarine Test by John Mayer, you'll know what I mean. Good luck man. I love you.

Have you ever considered that you are the problem?

I suggest you to visit the erotic massage place or even intimate with an escort, you will probably hide your marriage problems below the rug but at least you will find some pleasure in life before hitting middle age. You deserve more user, wait and contemplate a lot before asking for divorce you have kids to raise and alimony is tough in our days.

HE massage should cost you about $100 in total. Full service about $200.

Shit situation.

60 bucks is safe in most places. Feel it out, can tip less. Some will communicate tipping prices. If you need to, ask the girl.

I haven't hit a traditional rub and tug in a few years, but there's really not much to it. The worry of doing something is always worse.

Grabbing an escort isn't a terrible idea, either. At least, that way, you know the price up front. But really, you'll be fine at an Asian place.

A handjob isn't going to solve your problems. That's what divorce is for.

I will never understand people like you. In fact, I fucking hate everybody like you and wish you were here in front of my face so I could kick your sorry grease-monkey ass down the sidewalk.

I grew up in impoverished Appalachia. Tons of rough'n'tumble blue collar folks just like you who are stuck in marriages with fat wives that absolutely fucking hate each other. I later became a TSS and worked with kids. Every single time the kid was having problems at school, it came down to a situation just like yours. Mom and dad don't have their shit together and come up with every stupid fucking band-aid solution possible than either fixing their marriage or just getting divorced.

Why are you together then? If you two are that unhappy, just fucking get divorced you dumbass.

>AH WANT WUTTS BEST FER MUH KINFOLK

Think about it, genius. I understand that might be hard because you fucking bang metal part together for a living and have this history of great life decisions leading to your current awesome situation, but do you really think your kids don't realize how unhappy you are? Do you think it's "best" for them to live in a home where the mom smacks around dad, he doesn't hit her back because he doesn't want to go to jail, you guys and you two constantly bicker?

How is a divorce a bad thing? Just fucking get separated for the sake of your kids you piece of shit.

This.

Except for the "kicking OP in the face" part. He's got enough of that from his waifu.

Staying together won't help your "annoying" kids, who will probably grow up to hate you anyway. Turn 360 and walk away. Sorry, fam :(

Plus, if you get caught "cheating" that only gives her more ammunition and more leverage against you.

Um, dude. If you turn 360 you'll be in the exact same direction as you were at the start

Gotta be honest OP you need a divorce, it might be hard, but its for the best.

However go for the HE man! Do it! The last time I went I was able to suck this chinese bitchs tits while she jacked me off with lube, it was the best 120 bucks i spent, just be discreet, and pretend your there for a 'massage', to find other parlors though I recommend back page.com though.

Because if he divorced the stupid bitch, he'd be ass raped in divorce court. This man would not only lose the right to see his kids but all the shit that he's worked so hard for. Alimony, child support, and spousal support, this man would be putting himself in a big ass fucking grave if he tried to end the marriage. And fuck you for acting like he is the one dragging the marriage downhill.

Dumbass, it's a meme

Oh shit I definitely recall the last time I went to a nice 'massage' parlor, Ive been to some great ones here on the east coast. The last time I went I had the four hand massage, from two 30 something milf looking koreans, I swear I was in heaven while they had their way with me, and they used so much lube, it was perfect.

Feels like summer

if she assaults you, you can report her to the police just as she could to you.

>works 45 hours a week
>made the choice to get married
>claims life has been shit
>claims home is hell

Top fucking kek

Choices you made pal, I've lived through worse and I'm only 28

Thanks for the laugh

Take this ignorant bullshit somewhere else. We live in a world of no-fault divorces. When my parents got divorced, I requested my dad have custody of me and that was that.

>not knowing divorce courts will fuck OP up
get the fuck out cunt

I live in arkansas too. Where you from?

This. I'm screenshotting so I can say this in the future to anyone in the same situation which there's lots

I normally only post OC, but I'll make an exception for this. Read it. Read the whole thing. You probably know or knew most of this at one point, but it sounds like a refresher is in order. Fix your relationship, or just hang on long enough to see your kids off to college.

Don't purposely cause an even bigger rift in your family, especially if your kids are still young.

Sounds to me like you don't know shit about divorce.

Just a heads up for you, bud...That asian one in Cabot was busted a few years ago

If you were thinking about going to that one it might be a set up

One addition:
Do that if you can't fix it.

Jesus Christ.

Get out

"my parents got a fine divorce so stats dont matter"

OP here. I'm from Auburn, currently live in Birmingham.

To hell with the massage, go to a full service escort. No streetwalkers or backpage whores. Go to a discussion board that provides recommendations or reviews on local escorts & go to a well reviewed escort.

Does making strawman arguments over the internet make you feel better?

Again, you have no clue what you're talking about, and it's patently obvious to everyone here. Even if OP got "fucked" in the divorce and had to pay alimony, he'd still be better off in his own apartment, banging sluts, hanging out with his friends, and seeing his kids every other week than living with bitch tits.

Again, take your ignorance somewhere else.

How well does a car mechanic pay?

eccie.net/forumdisplay.php?f=66

Hide a camera and record her hitting you then show the judge the video when getting the divorce. Youll end up with the kids but wont have to pay any child support.

Damn this thread is a pretty nice read. Let me add to it. OP, my latest experience at a massage parlor was:
>walk in
>Vietnamese lady early 40s greets me
>pay for session
>undress, massage begins
>sucks my dick, I cum, I leave happy
It was a great experience, it sounds you'd definitely need something like that- go for it!

It varies from place to place. I get paid $25 an hour. But I've been doin it for approx 25yrs an I'm a full ASE master tech. I don't know what OP is capable of doing. But I've seen techs make more than this. It also depends if they get paid commission, if somethin calls for an hr to do an they knock it out sooner they still get paid the hr but if they do it in 3hrs they only get paid the hr,. But I've seen some techs not get paid shit cause the place they work at is a shitty place. Hope OP is on the higher end of the pay scale an can get out from under the control bitch and get his state of mind back

I'm gonna ignore everything above me and put it simply. Yes, do it.

It'll relieve your urges and you probably won't end up wanking for a month or so, and will probably grow closer to your wife. All these fucking internet white knights will tell you to "just leave her" or to "sort your shit out" but none of those virgins have been in long term relationships. Just go get a fucking massage and let an asian toss you off, they're pretty damn good at it

I've been to lots of escorts. Don't go too young because they all lie about their age, and because it's only the young ones the police are really concerned about. Do some research on your girl. Google her phone number. Reverse image search her pics. If anything looks sketchy then abort.%

Don't do it. Just leave her. Don't cheat because your kids will be devastated if they hear this. At least communicate that you're filing a divorce before whoring yourself out in a massage place.

BOOM HAHAHAHAHA HELL YEAH!!! This would be AWESOME AS HELL for the OP to do. I'd love to be there when that bitch starts cryin how the OP is treating her like shit an the only way she will feel better is for her to get 90% of his shit an pay. But he busts out the vid an her jaw drops when the judge sees her beating the shit outta him an he/she awards the OP what he wants and the bitch nada!!!

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This has everything you need for a life of mongering.

Seriously, professional massage parlours & escorts are extremely discrete. You can count on it since their reputation depends on maintaining customers privacy. You'll probably need a cell to book. Protect that bill because the numbers will appear in it. Or use a text program to send from alternate number. Also disable google location on your device because it tracks your location if someone knows how to access through your google account.

OP look don't listen to the other cucks in the thread your wife is a bitch obviously, you shouldnt even care what she thinks, or if she finds you cheating, just go for it! HE parlors are the best!

Answer this question: where do you see yourself at 45? At 50? Are you still with your wife at 50? Is she still a cunt to you at 50? Why not do something for yourself? Why waste time waiting on things to change?

You could try to work things out but if she gets the better of you just one time she will end up with at least half of everything you own anyway.

Maybe it's drastic, but unless you can feasibly get her to change I'd say don't risk getting thrown in jail for that bitch. Just get a divorce and be happy.

man, i would just divorce. you would have your slaary just for you and a bit for your kids, and have the opportunity to do whatever you want

Just one advice. Make sure they have a shower. That oil smells (not bad) and sticks.

Think of it this way: if you're here, it's over. You're going to divorce and she's gonna take half your shit. So keep $200 in the bank and you lose $100 anyway. Go to a $200 escort and you're only out and extra hundred, you get laid, and you deprive her of $100 in legal settlements. It's like the 50% day at the whore house!