29 Years old

29 Years old.
My whole family is completely extinct.
Parents died when i was 16 in a car accident, i dont have any siblings and grandparents are gone. I have no uncles or aunts.
After my parents passed i started drinking almost every day and it is fair to say i was a pretty heavy alcoholic since i was about 17 years old.
I got my education though and got a good job.
I have always been lonley i have a few close friends but im really lacking family.
I was depressed but then i found my sweetheart gf. She is the greatest thing that has happend to me. I love her, she is a nice innocent loving gf and i largely dropped my alcoholism quickly without much difficulty.
We go on romantic vacations abroad and such. I want to marry her and have kids with her in the future.
We have been together for over 4 years by now.
Despite being at a peak in my life right now seemingly i feel like a lot of past negative emotion is creeping in and i have started to drink a lot the past 6 months.
I sometimes get really mad at her when i get drunk for no reason.
2 Days ago i was having a really bad day. I was just depressed and angry and i thought my girl was annoying because she was complaining.
When going to bed that day i was very drunk and mad. I told her to spread her leggs but she didnt want to have sex she said. But i dont know why and i dont know what happend to me but i just snapped and flipped her over and fucked her very roughly. When i finnished i turned her head around and she was crying and shaking and i felt terrible. I apologized a thousand times and i kissed and hugged her and said i was sorry and i went to sleep in the tv room.
When i woke up she was gone and i tried to call and message her but she didnt respond.
I am scared to death that i will lose her and will defintaly kill myself i i lose her.
What do i do to get her to stay and how do i deal with my alcoholism and depression.

Please help.

Simple: Stop being depressed

Any tips?

just go to a therapist

Best of luck with those rape charges friendo.

Is more alcohol not an option?

Are they really any good?

First things first
Have you succesfully found her and apologise?

Im confident more alcohol is not the soloution.

sounds like a bullshit story

She is staying with a friend and i am going over to talk to her what do i say?

I must say I'm looking forward to you getting your ass raped in prison and your bloodline ending when you get shanked.
go die you piece of human garbage

Was that as good for you as it was for me?

bad idea

Ha she is staying with a friend. You're extra fucked. She might not want to report you, but her friend sure as fuck wants her to.

Stop drinking. One drink is too many. A thousand are not enough.

I screwed up so badly. I dont know what happend i am not a very violent person

She would be a complete moron to go back to you, lets say you do end up getting together again wth would stop you from killing a future Child drunkenly. I can only see it end bad for you

just kill yourself now op
it will save you getting buttfucked in prison

If she accepts me back i dont plan on having a child until i am well. Also i would never kill a child.

kys

Sorry but no
>inB4 kys

I am from a country where such things dont happen in prison sorry.

Kek

"I'm sorry" is a good start.
No, seriously. It doesn't matter what poem you'll spray out. The longer you wait the worse it will get.
Kiss her feet, smell her fart, whatever. Admit that you were in the wrong the whole time and you don't want to live even a second without her.

DO IT!

Rush B, Cyka!

just like you would never rape op ?
you fucked up for life

Your only option is to move far, far away. You literally have nothing keeping you there anymore.

I will do that

where are you from op

I wouldnt call it straight up rape as if she told me to stop clearly and resisted i would stop. I know it was terrible of me

Sweden

Do you think is impossible that she would forgive me?

you put your dick into her after she said she doesn't want sex with you.
how is that not rape op ?
you are a rapist, accept it and move on with your life

you're gonna get buttfucked by 50 somali niggers in prison.
sorry to break it to you

Clearly you are a virgin.
I would say it is common for guys to get rejected initially but after some persuation sex happens.

Sounds pretty fucking much like rape you fucking degenerate, you literally shouldnt touch any alcohol ever again

I said i would commit suicide if she wont have me back.

I know what i did was terrible and i must have scared her too much for her to speak up or resist but in my drunk mind i didnt realize that.

I have kids you dumb moron
it's not common, it's manipulative as fuck. talking a girl into sex is pretty fucking degenerate. but of course you rush to op's defense because both of you are fucking rapists, the only difference is op takes it by force and you have to manipulate a woman into sleeping wirh you.
fucking disgusting

No, but you do understand that you have heavily tainted the relationship. It's like having a threesome, shits never going to be the same. Just move away I bet you can find better out there. You also have no way to be tracked down, no family. Just stop being a pussy and explore the world.

Chek'd
Tell it to the judge.

You must be a single mother, how are little Jarome, and Deniqua?

"I raped my gf because my life is shitty so why not make hers shitty too."
Should've killed yourself way before now.

Dude we have been together for many years.
Havent you had a single incident where you want sex and she dosnt and you get your way in the end either by turning it into some dominant thing, playful thing or puppy eye thing?

I literally dont want a girl other than her.

no, because I can respect a "no" apparently

Even if she would be stupid enough to take you back she'll never forget it, wouldnt it be better trying something new? And avoid prison while you are at it

KEK that's what you think?? My God find a shread of self respect. I think the rest of the thread may be right. Kys.

I cant imagine spending the rest of my life with someone other than her. She is perfect and i love her more than anything else.

checked

So youve never gone "cmon baby" even?

Too bad.
You destroyed it all.

That's not true and you know it. You're just an alcoholic and have settled. Enjoy the shithole you have created for yourself.

Im going soon to talk to her any brofags who have any help for me?

You dont understand before i met her i was as low as one can get and being with her until recently completely turned my life around.

Satanic Tripps of Doom.
You blew it, op.

Say your sorry, then move away. Don't fuck this up OP.

if she tells ya she wants to report you paint yourself brown and claim you're from somalia, you'll get 2 days of community service and get to keep living your life.
nice trips of satan you got there

Obviously not if your forcing her to fuck dipshit.

why, of all places to go, would you come here?

She just told me on msg that she forgives me. I will pick her up soon.

No, because you blew it. You got drunk out of will power and basically raped her. If she meant so much to you, then you would have stayed away from alcohol in general. Until you learn to control yourself, you need to let her go before you just do something worse.

tl;dr user raped his nice gf and expects her to get over it. user is delusional drunk who will an hero (hopefully on cam)

I dont know ive been on here for a long time.

Explain to her that something is seriously wrong and you completely snapped. She may need some time away, and that's fine, but the other was a wake up call on your part and you're going to start seeing a therapist because you don't want to be a harm to yourself and others. You fucked up OP but if she loves you she'll understand. Just give her some time and take your treatment seriously. Hope all goes well

She told me she forgives me.

Not much advice but i wish you luck user , and if she leaves you the world isn't gonna end
Also check em

doesn't change the fact that you did some rapey-rapey to your girlfriend op

Thx man

Thx man

I know and i am ashamed but i am getting sober now and i would never do it again.

Just as you would never in the first case

need a friend my dood?

I do

Stop drinking for one. Then buy her the biggest bouquet of her favorite flowers you can and get her a card. Inside the card write her a note. Explain exactly what you did on here and tell her it's wasn't right and you don't deserve her forgiveness. Tell her you're quitting for good and will join AA if you must. Explain that she is the only good thing in your life, and instead of turning to alcohol, you should have turned to her.

Then get on your knees and pray to whatever God you believe in and beg for her not to leave you...or press charges on you for rape.

If/when she takes you back in...don't touch a drop of alcohol again.

Oh. And when she says no. ITS FUCKING NO YOU RAPIST ALCOHOLIC PIECE OF SHIT.

Yeah, physical evidence of a note he wrote saying he raped her should nail those charges down nice and tight.

Thanks for the advice man i will do

*hugs* don't worry although I have no idea who you are. just hang on

Send her this thread I think she would understand after reading it

Thanks man

I would ask for away to contact but I'm afraid trolls and fuckers will screw it up. Even if I gave my stupid email xD

Its okay

I will go now thx for help.

Just go onto one of those temporary email websites. The email address is automatically deleted after a few minutes.

Pick up your nuts and own up to your mistake. Nobody's perfect, but you can't walk away from your mistakes in this world. Learn from it, great men rise from climbing back up through rocky hills. She may walk away, but can you blame her? Your depression and anxiety is no excuse to treat others unfairly. My advice to you is find out where she is and apologise to her face to face. Let her know how you truly felt and why you did what you did, let her know that despite your condition there wasn't anything in this world that could to justify what you did. If she accepts your apology and gets back with you then God bless her heart, you have yourself a good hearted woman. Don't ever do what you did and don't ever project your insecurities onto her or onto others again. If she walks away, then fine. You have to take responsibilities from your action. Don't feel discouraged though, you can either report yourself to show her that you're truly sorry or you can go on and live your life how you please. Go to the gym, get fit, travel the world. Visit interesting places. Find out who you are, find out what you want in life, find out the true meaning of life, the world is a big place. Explore, take a journey. Don't give up, nothing is more powerful than a human spirit (our God is the most powerful of course). You can do it. Life is like a roller coaster, it goes down and up and around. It never goes on a straight line because no one likes a boring roller coaster. Time will always heal. Best of luck my friend

you right bb