Why haven't you ordered the Spiderman™ pizza from Pizza Hut™ tonight?
I'm going to cut out the cover and hang it on my wall. Jelly?
My stats:
>42
>Live with mom
>5'9"
>256 lbs
>White
>Green eyes
>Herpes
>8 incher
>Worst thing I've done: Fuck a Chinese prostitute in China without a condom.
#MAGA
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because im fucking poor
Because I'm not gay
>because im fucking poor
Sorry, bro.
You have no idea what you're missing.
This Spiderman ™ pizza is amazing!!!
>Because I'm not gay
Sounds like jelly talk, bro.
Jelly donut jellyyyyyyy
How in the fuck are you supposed to eat that thing?
>Ordered this from pizza hut
>just got regular crust
>call to ask for a replacement
>"you need to come down with the original pizza for us to swap it"
>oh.. can you just refund it then so I can reorder?
>"you'd need to come down with the pizza for us to refund the debit card"
>oh.. alright no big deal then, thanks
much later
>order this again, call them instead of online ordering
>say politely "I ordered this last time I ordered and got the wrong item, just want to make sure I get the cheesy bites crust this time"
>guy hangs up on me
>oh... ok.
>Order online
>wrong pizza comes again
>fuck it, just eat it
>next day have horrible diarhea
99% sure they did something to it.
Like any murrican, you just wildly take handfuls of it and wash it down with diet coke.
because I heard the crust is stuffed with spider eggs.
>How in the fuck are you supposed to eat that thing?
We're breaking off the cheese filled mini bites, dipping them in sauce that comes in the box, then eat the pizza with your hands, like a real American ™!
Literally every single human being on Earth knows better than to fuck with the pizza people, then order another pizza.
In high school, we would spit, jizz, fart and put all kinds of shit on pizza for people like you.
These are high school kids and losers, and you're expecting they'll go out of their way for you, retard?
What a retard.
Next time, don't be a fat lazy bitch and go return it or just shut the fuck up.
>for people like you
I tip 50% every time I order and I was polite as fuck.
Are people really that immature?
I work customer service. When the company I work for screws up I apologize on behalf of the company and make it right for the customer, I don't cry and piss or spit on their order.
sucks to be you then
>Are people really that immature?
Yes, dude. It's mostly kids and old losers who hate life. It's a pizza place! Lol
I remember we used to put weight gainer into this fat kids diet Coke.
I think we may have driven him to suicide.
This was back in the 90's, so bullying a kid into suicide wasn't illegal yet.
I'm sorry son, the faggotry is terminal.
>Pizza Hut
>Why haven't you ordered
Because I live in New York and we have real pizzerias here.
I legit wish I could. The pizza hut in my area has a 1-star Yelp review for all kinds of grab-asstic shit. Most pizzas they send out are so raw that you can still form the dough and they aren't even warm. That is if they remember to even bring it.
I love getting an authentic New York slice from Sbarros!
>Because I live in New York and we have real pizzerias here.
You also have a ton of niggers, spics, trannies, Jews, faggots, drug addicts, homeless people, refugees, liberals and chinks EVERYWHERE! Haha
Take pride in living in a literal roach motel.
You're garbage, and you take pride in living in a dump!
HAHAHAHA
My lawn was mowed today.
Do you even know what grass looks like?
You disgusting me.
*Spits in your faggot nigger face*
...
>diet coke
That sucks, Satan.
Thanks for showing up in my thread, Lord of Darkness.
You have thin slabs of just enough dough to hold the grease and rat shit together. Folding your giant slice to form a grease funnel down your throat.
I don't eat shit-tier pizza.
This, I get Sbarros if I want an authentic NY pizza or Unos if I want authentic Chicago pizza.
That's not Satan retard, he was 47 digits off.
Oh fuck maybe I am autistic.
How do you pronounce Sbarros?
>I don't eat shit-tier pizza.
Oh, well look at the princess over here.
Would you like some grey poupon with your dragon dildo, faggot?
>Unos if I want authentic Chicago pizza.
Oh damn, I forgot about Uno's. Haven't been there in over ten years.
Like lasagna
like sa-barrows
like mario would say "it-sa-me"
it-sa barro
Mondays, amirite?
I say Sbarros
>Like lasagna
I guess. It's more like eating pizza without the crust, since you eat the crust first.
I just used my hands, folded it, dumped it in the sauce. So fucking good.
Because Pizza Hut is shit, the Pizza tastes like cardboard smothered in grease.
like this youtu.be
Aww, how cute.
Go to bed, son.
>Because Pizza Hut is shit, the Pizza tastes like cardboard smothered in grease
Here we go.
Anthony Bourdain everyone!
I'm sorry we don't have caviar pizza for you, faggot.
I guess you'll have to drink your strawberry daquari without pizza.
Fucking homo.
I won't go to bed for a long time.
>Fireworks going off
>American Dad on laptop
>Shopping on Amazon and eBay
>Shitposting on my phone
Life is too good to sleep!
Suck burn. I'm sure he will have some.. reservations.. about saying that again.
Haha Nice.
Niiiiiiiiiiice.
*Stares at you sensually*
*briefly makes eye contact before looking away, and then spending the rest of my life wondering what could have been*
I was going to write a scenario where I held you down and violently raped you, but then I was like, "that's just too much."
check please
Lol dork.
...
I agree, You are fucking retard
Too bad you are not everyone. Dipshit
>you disgusting me
Yep you're both disgusting
>Yep you're both disgusting
This may not be the right website for you, snowflake.
Thanks user.
post a face pic op. you sound hot
let's see pics of mom
we know you have them
Because my local PizzaHut ran out of Pizzabites Crust Pizza. They only had regular stuffed crust and I'm feeling salty af right now.
That sucks.
Email pizza hut corporate.
They'll give you a free pizza.
Someone missed the point. fag
Advertising is against the rules.
i got my pizza hut shut down. or, rather, they did.
>order a pan pizza
>it's fucking wrong again
>it's a pan, but has onions and other bullshit on it
>fuck. hungry so just going to eat it
>grab a slice
>looks like a hunk of browned cheese stuck to bottom (between crust and pan goodness)
>peel it off to eat first
>it's a wing
>pull rest off
>here come the legs
>lift up next slice - find head
>suppress urge to vomit
>take pics
>send pics of giant roach cooked into dough to corporate pizza hut
get a call two days later, someone apologizes profusely. tell them this pizza hut has been fucking up orders for the last couple of years, but this was new and awful. i'm sure they were just hoping to prevent a lawsuit, but whatever.
>Someone missed the point. fag
You're "humor" doesn't translate well online, faggot.
Don't quit your *ahem* day job!
A free pizza won't fix my current predicament.
I never even go here, but due to how my day went I haven't made dinner and I only chose this place for the gay cum bites pizza. Fuck, I'm unreasonably mad right now and it makes no sense.
>Advertising is against the rules
Shut the fuck up, retard.
It's a current event going on in America right now.
You try and get me banned, see what happens!
I'll shut down the entire goddamned internet!!!
Or you don't understand English or how it's used properly, go fuck yourself
Go tell that to Blacked.com with their 100+ threads per day.
>Or you don't understand English or how it's used properly, go fuck yourself
Lol my phone changed it, FAGGOT
I'm pretty sure I know the difference between you're a faggot, and your mom sucks my cock!
BAZINGA!!!!!
That hardly makes sense, but with the autocorrect, I can understand how that sentence happened. However, your joke was stupid so again, go fuck yourself faggot
Dude, just admit you're falling in love with me. Just admit it right now.
Im not even OP
Awesooooooooome!!!
But what's with the sideways photo?
he has the same stats as OP
Because the Pizza Hut in my town closed down because people refused to work there.
>because people refused to work there.
Why didn't you volunteer to save it??!
Because it was own by the same franchise as the place I work, and I barely want my place to be still open (only reason is income for my children).
It's not available in my country
No way dude. Im younger and taller..
And a much smaller dick dude.
All i see is OP didnt deliver and user did. What are you doing with your life? Debating strangers cock size?
What's with all this dick talk?
"So raw"
Do dumb cunts like you think that they do anything more to the pizza than assemble it and throw it into an oven which will without a doubt fully cook it, and then with that is placed under a heating rack, then a specialized heating bag which keeps anything burning hot for hour.
Your pizza is always cooked and more than likely just under burning hot, you miserable cunt
Settle down... The last one I got from them was like a take-and-bake pizza. The cheese was not even melted. When I look at their reviews I am definitely not the only one that it has happened to. The store has a lot of problems and appears to be run by people on hard drugs. Please help me understand why I would lie about the doneness of my pizza.
serious question guys who plays Spider-Man in the new movie?
Matthew Macanahe
This didn't happen, you can clearly see if a roach were to be on a pizza.