/brit/

english roses edition

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I fancy bucks but don't tell her

TOUCH MY PENIS

usa

i just got attacked by a hummingbird out of nowhere

damn thing made me just out of my seat

the fwb's body is about of the 2nd from left's, but she's got a better face and is young. how grim is my life?

more like PooSA

need my willy in english fanny tbphwyl

anime

crying

fwd:

Reverse Googled OP pic and found this, which gave me a chuckle.

need Theresa May out of business

Just found out my mum might be voting tory

because it's totally unnecesery. the skin is designed to stretch, and it will, with perseverence. the cons of cutting it off vastly outweigh the pros (there are no pros). it might hurt a lot and it might take months but it's totally doable. and then you have a healthy 100% complete, functioning penis. forever. no risk.

ani may not

sounds like a decent lass who understands politics

ah yes, americans

HAHAHAHA what the FUCK was that

Just eat normally and start sporting. Even if you lose half a kilo a week you'll be perfectly normal after a year.

accidentally posted in the old thread

people are so bad at fighting
like if someone is squaring right up to you without protecting their chin, you should be able to put them on their arse with a quick overhand, hook or uppercut

she's voted labour in every election since 1987
so idk what gives

In the past few months the so called "mates" have cut contact with me, sure they're fine to me in real life but they never invite me anywhere or message me and after seeing photos of them at a night out they told me they weren't going to but went without letting me know I'm sick of it

Moved on to the anger stage

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Cripes
What went you in the faulty brain clinic for
Did cornwall ever come to your house and rub his 4 incher on the window
Hows Ulster the little devil
please dont off yourself theres few enough reddit flaggers left as it is

Sad!

some slutty latina woman who didn't speak english was upset at my job because we canceled her layaway. She was frustrated because of the language barrier and we couldn't get her money back. I wish I could have used the situation as leverage to see her tits, she was leaning over the counter the entire time and I could see her skimpy black bra down her blouse. I probably could have just molested her and she wouldn't have been able to tell anyone

she understands that we need consistency in our brexit negotiations and that labour would pussy out and get bullied around by the EU globalists

tbf it was a very powerful strike, if he'd landed it it would've floored him no doubt but he just wasn't looking at all at his target haha

the gf

This is gold

Bravo

Morrison's carpark will be literred with the bodies of marcus Hauser...

Good luck my son. Absolutely fucking banging chahoon. Love some hardcore cracked a tooth going mad to this at the last rave I was at
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You love the sesh big man

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my favourite

don't click this virus

more like JewSA

Roaring

piss

if that elbow connected (it shaved the side of his face), but an inch to the right and i calculate it would have caused notable damage. was funny the force of it was enough to knock himself over though, but furthers my point

could "swipe down" refer to a common method of refreshing social media applications on a smartphone or ipad? considering tim is on youtube and twitter 24/7...

>fwb
Dire situation
Basically she wants to fuck other guys so she doesn't give you a special label

i get him trying the elbow smash, which is nice if it lands (not something to open with (2nd or 3rd strike in a combo as you work closer to the targer)), but there is no reason he should have come off the ground like he did as he threw it, feet planted or it aint worth shit

whats actually wrong with tim though? why hasnt he been sectioned under the mental health act?

>eat sleep work and wank
>then you die

what's the point?

now I know why Asia is flooded with british males

i said the fwb's body not mine

Wrong, he lifted himself off his own feet, wouldn't have done much if he's not grounded to follow through

here for a horny pissing session

because he's not considered dangerous and can seemingly look after himself to an acceptable level

WASHING THE DISHES

>the united STATE of yankdom

Wow gow ironic, the character is saying he/she isn't a weirdo, but she/he is clearly in clothing that is clearly not normal for a typical person; thus making the character a "weirdo" and contradicting his/her statement.

he nearly was, but instead he just had to find a new flat

he's not a threat to himself or other people

he just wants to live a quiet life with his bears and not get messed around

couldn't they give him medicine that makes him sane again though...?

...

yes, but he doesn't want that

what a joke

cannot stand people like that. they should be fucking required by law to take medication to fix their spastic brains or sent to mine salt

who is the good guy here?

you're a real badass

bet you've never been a fight let alone a kerfuffle

Gfs making me pick her sister up from school

more like obese edition

you mean until he loss it and knifes someone for knocking on his door or run over pedestrians on his shopping run to m&s

they tried but he refused
pretty sure they can't make him do anything against his will if he's not a danger

shame people keep trying to put him out of business

He's a massive cunt to everyone around him, oxford health man sent him a heartfelt letter and Tim just fobbed it off, he thinks everyone's out to mess him around, if he wasn't able to maintain the illusion of sanity now he'd probably be put in a mental and kept there

Judo would be the way to go in that, and most situations like that. It hurts the ego far more to be controlled easily and without being hurt. Just gently put them on the floor and sit on them and watch their face turn red with humiliation. Choking them in and out of consciousness is an optional bonus.

I was starting a new drug called clozapine and got diagnosed with schizophrenia.
Would love him to, would love to heem that loser.
Dunno haven't talked to him in a while but I went out with him to smoke joints and stuff not long ago was fun, miss him.

don't get why people get such a chip on their shoulder over stuff like this here. I wasn't even posturing with that post. But ive been in enough fights and more boxing matches, knocked people out and broken ribs, I know how to punch

well thats for his psychiatrists to decide isn't it

>the UK will have an African monarch in our lifetime

Loving
Every
Laugh

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>sane again
Wot

>yanks already had an african president

HOWLING

no they won't

obama wasn't born in america so he wasn't a legitimate president hon xx

brother nathanael went hard on the red pill

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>what a joke
>
>cannot stand people like that. they should be fucking required by law to take medication to fix their spastic brains or sent to mine salt

stop it

Schizo.
t. schizo
You can get drug-resistant schizophrenia. I have it, it's pretty fucking dire we have to suffer our whole lives. Might apply for that swiss assisted suicide thing.

hahahahaaa dont particularly agree with that mans cause but i really respect the way he puts it across

quintessential yank post

why can girls not take someone disagreeing with them?

i hate how guys have warped their minds to the point where the girl thinks everything she says is right

why are drumpfsters such twats

A monarch and a president aren't even comparable. One is the symbol of the country while the other is just a faggot Mafioso

not got too much experience with judo (only got like halfway through the belts) but I'd expect you would have to be very good to completely neutralise someone who is the agressor and knows what theyre doing in a street situation

though in a regular scrap a headlock almost always works if you can get it (though don't let their legs be behind yours, I got knee'd in the back of the thigh once while headlocking someone and it hurt so fucking much)

would bounce this runts head off the ground

Listening to nick drake lads

Hate Tories. Hate kings. Hate UKIP. Hate bankers. Hate fascists. Hate the right. NOT leftist just don't like them simple as. Love reds

wonder who could be behind this post

>one head of state and another head of state aren't comparable

presidents are just elected monarchs

>Santa
>Satan

makes you think

>don't get why people get such a chip on their shoulder over stuff like this here
you're surprised there are insecure individuals on /brit/?

Everything is falling apart

the internet was made for watching girls wee
what is the point of it otherwise?

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are you the unironic communist that always posts here late night when your folks are in bed? i dont care or anything but ive become pretty good at spotting you

are the twilight novels written in first person or third person?

asking for a friend

well no, but I was literally just explaining how the strike wasn't effective because his feet didn't stay on the ground and guy personally attacks me

bit rude

christina hendricks is fucking perfect looking

prefer not to say

>he has a foot or piss fetish

im getting ... no true scotsman ...

wait, nobody has ever thought alex jones is serious, right?

it's obviously always been a complete fucking act