Does this sound like im being used, or at least not cared about?

Does this sound like im being used, or at least not cared about?

>Have friend (grill)
>We hang out most weeks, drinking, gaming, movies etc
>She starts dating my best friend
>All of a sudden, we do nothing, we barely contact each other for 3 months, every conversation was really mundane, like distant
>They break up
>All of a sudden, shes using me as a shoulder to cry on, and er start talking loads more, she wants to hang out again.

She also does things like cuddle up to me, be over affectionate to constantly bitch about all her issues, i feel like she doesn't want any serious relationship with me, and as soon as she finds another guy she just knocks me back completely.

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Just dump her, she is a lousy friend, she is obviously using you.
She thinks you are a loser who Will wait for her all eternity

>i feel like she doesn't want any serious relationship with me, and as soon as she finds another guy she just knocks me back completely.

That is correct. When you get older and your friends start getting married you will notice people you hung out with weekly might only talk to you once every few months.

She has no interest in your cock. You are a friend, and as such, friends tend to fade away when you are in a relationship.

Did you miss the part where they arent even dating? Dude is in the deepest recesses of the Friend Zone but still isnt sure "if he is being used"... used for what? As a friend?

Didn't read, but yes

To a degree, i understand not hanging out as much, but even talking over social media stopped almost completely. Where as my best friend, and various other friends in relationships still kept contact, did things like played games and hung out.

It's more of, when she was dating my best friend, we barely talked, the next moment she was messaging me on a daily basis again.

Yes you are. She is using you for companionship when she gets out of a relationship where shes getting dick laid into her from some chad. She is using you for the male role without you receiving any of the benefits of it (sex.)

Honestly let her come over one time. Sit her down very seriously and tell her you want to help her out but you are being treated unfairly. If she wants comfort and someone to hang with then she has to give up that ass to you.

Either she says ok and you get a benefriends relationship or more likely she says no and you can completely cut her out of your life guilt free.

In the 3 1/2 months they were dating, we didn't hang out at all, and we had 2 very light conversations, shit like "how have you been"

It's happened before, it's just starting to annoy me, it's like she's gettings loads more out of our friendship than me, im pretty much her emotional support and the guy that looks after her when shes crying, for me she's just someone to hang with, i never really express my emotions, i tend to kept them to myself.

i feel like it's petty to ignore her over such a stupid thing, but it's just annoying me, lots

Important thing to remember is you don't owe her shit. If you're interested in her and she's not interested, it's best to just pack up and move on, because she's never going to come around.

The only person that can put you in the friendzone is you user.

shes using you op
since when are women not using anyone you fucking retard

bravo user! best response

Is that not a shitty thing to do?

It's not that i want an intimate relationship with her, or even fuck buddies, i just want her to not ignore me when ever she gets a new guy, and if that guy is my best bro, not exclude me from tons of shit. Friend would ask if i wanted to come do something, like play overwatch and she would say something like "id prefer if he didnt" (he send me screenshots of their chat", the main reason he broke up with her was she never liked other people doing things with them, and she always wanted to be with him

No its a alpha thing to do. If you dont want to fuck her stop spedning time with her. You are going to realize eventually that men and women are incompatible as friends in adult life. The sooner you get to that realization the happier you will be.

Seriously, thats fairly normal as you get older. Im still friends with my best friend since daycare (we grew up 2 houses apart) but we are both married, both have kids... we talk maybe twice a year and actually meet up every year or 2 for vacation.

Once life really starts to kick in "friends" become acquaintances and acquaintances become the annoying phone call you dont want to have. Its just how it is.

classic friendzone.
call her out on it and either lose her as a friend or seek her out romantically. it's natural for her to spend more time with boyfriend over friends but as you described it seems like you were avoided when she was in a relationship. so she's a bitch using you unless you prove your worth. if she isn't worth that level of competition then just bail like a beta

She's not using you, she's ABUSING you. Ignore her ass or get cucked.

This. Man needs sex. Woman needs to run her mouth. If she gets what she wants and you don't, it's fucked. You will hate life forever. Get rid of that bitch.

urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=intellectual whore

You are an intellectual whore, my friend. Your best bet is to cut her off completely and never talk to her again. To do otherwise is failure.

But you won't. Whore.

Yes! Women are not your friend!

user listen to me when I say this: you sound like a little bitch. Don't put yourself through this with a chick. It always ends up the same way and you're not going to be happy if you keep this up. You're basically a doormat and you're either too naive too see it or to scared to admit it. Cut your losses now before you hurt yourself more. Also remember this, if you keep this up longer it's only going to hurt you more when it inevitably ends.

I guess, i might just feel used as im never that phone call, every time i lose someone close i just go on a bender and never really express or talk to anyone.

What do you suppose i do? it's really irritating me, i guess it's not ignore me for a long time, i guess it's the crawling back and expecting me to be there 24/7 for her when ive never relied on her once.

Had same experience. Almost exactly the same.
Advice - drop the relationship. It can't end well for you, and it is a waste of time at best. Better spend your time with people who want to spend time with you not depending on their relationship status.

How do i end it?

Do i just ignore all her contact and hope like fuck i never see her in town (smallish town (30k))

Did you call her out on it?

So coming clean and telling her what you think is not an option? WHy?
It will most likely end your contact as a worst case scenario, and will give you closure at best.

Ignore her as long as possible. If she sends little one off texts just ignore them. Like if she just says "hey I totally did this today isnt that funny!" that kind of shit... just ignore.

Then once she blows you up multiple times in one day asking to come over and use you as a doormat just break the news to her.

Simply say something to the effect of that you need to tell her something really serious. Explain that she is using you as a emotional support system when she breaks up with someone and you do not want to be that person anymore. Tell her as you are growing up more and maturing you are realizing that the type of relationship you two have isnt healthy for you or fair at all. Tell her you arent gonna talk shit on her, or be mad at her, you just cant have this relationship with her anymore. Then say goodbye and delete her number.

Trust me op, the longer you let her fill this spot in your life the longer until you can actually find a romantic interest for yourself. She will chase away potential girl friends and try to convince you any girl you might talk to is a slut and "just not good for you." Meanwhile the second she finds the next chad she will be off taking his dick while you sit at home wondering why your plans were canceled.

I agree with these anons. A woman who is your friend should also be someone you eventually get to sex. If no sex is being had someone in that "friendship" is probably not satisfied (most likely the guy) and being friends with a girl you don't want to fuck doesn't have many benefits because bros are much more compatible so just get male friends. Women like to have reliable males in their lives to provide things they need while also being replaceable.

I still feel like it sounds petty, considering we have been close friends for nearly 5 years, she considers me, or tells me that im one of her closest friends and that feeling was mutual, but im getting sick of being ignored every time she gets a new guy, for months on end.

tl;dr: anxiety around sounding like a bitch

>your feelings and well being are petty

seriously OP you need to mature the fuck up and grow a pair.

This.

All my people who I grew up with started having babies and getting married and they fucking vanished.

Im married and about to have a kid and I STILL try to arrange ways for all of us to hang out again or have a reunion and they still arent interested.

There are a few people who still care and come around, and you will come to find that those are your real friends.

Kinda sad. Friendship as an adult is'nt like it was when you were younger.

As soon as this girl finds a guy she really likes or has a baby OP you will never see her again.

Trust me, was in your situation with a girl I was in love with, she would date and fuck all my friends but me.

It was so fucking frustrating, and then one day she got married and pregnant, and she never talked to me again.

Told me its not a good idea since shes married and all to hang out with me.


But she still hangs out with all our other friends daily.

So there that is.

In all honesty mate you'll either sound like a petty bitch or keep acting like a side bitch with no benefits. If she honestly doesn't give you much as a friend then why save it. You don't have to break off shit. Just ghost on her long enough and see what happens. If she really wants you around this will give you leverage and power.

She is a shit friend and you should waste no more time with her.

Jeesus christ, maybe you should care less about how you sound and care more about what you actually do? Telling a person directly what you think is wrong is not bitching. Bitching is, for example, acting moody or ignoring someone instead of telling them what is wrong.

Okay, what do i do about mural friends ?

Hang out with them as you want to. If she shows up that fine just ignore that she is there. Be pleasant and cordial but dont focus on her in the slightest. If you are having people to your place dont invite her. Not a complicated issue at all.

I know, i have a severe anxiety disorder. I overthink everything.

I think im going to hang with her one last time, as a way for me to say goodbye, without saying goodbye.

Cut off the physical contact. Give her a hug when you meet up but keep it at that. Is she try to cuddle get up and sit somewhere else. If you need to say you need a drink of water and when you come back sit somewhere else.

I mean like, if people ask why i don't invite her. Tell them straight up, make some shitty excuse?

That sucks user, i feel bad for you.

I don't know if she was hanging out with other male friends, i know she was hanging out with her female ones.

ive decided im going to end it, just ghost on her and remove myself from any group chat's we're in.

just tell them, who gives a shit anyway

Just say you dont really hang out anymore. Or that you just want to hang "with the boys." If its your really close friends, especially the one who dated her just tell him the real reason he will understand.

I wouldn't cut her off. The problem is you are investing in her more then she is in you. Knock that shit off. Stay friends or whatever. Also get yourself out there bud find girls to talk to and hang out with.

Please take my advise , i had the same exact situation , it happened twice coming from the same grill, no bullshit everyone on Sup Forums told me to run away from this situation , youre being cuck , she will let you think she is somehow interested but shes not , she can flirt and give you enough attention to hold you close as her beta cuckslave . I was fucking idiot enough to still stick around that grill, she made me felt like shit many times but wtv , ive entered in contact with a girl i was previously into and turn out newgrill made me completly forget about femanon who was cucking me , btw it was the first time in my life i dealt with being cucked so hard (some grills are manipulative )


Stop this toxic relationship RN exept if you are ready to see her and loose her as soon she find a boyfriend.

I repeat , ABORT THE SHIP ITS ALREADY SINKING

No user just forget her and move on. Life is short so spend it with someone who values you.

just talk to people , be confident , people love being around confident people . Just go for it user

Its shitty what she's doing to you dude

But if you feel comfortable cucking for some woman who will inevitably sue you for child support for some other man's kid because you took on a "parental role" then by all means keep her in your life. No genetic relation required.

Women like that are nothing but trouble. They are the ones who destroy your life. If she's guilt free why can't you be about cutting ties now before this situation gets out of hand for you?

at least he is getting laid. Shiiit, better than i was in High School

Do you have sexual interest in her? Then you should have cut contact sooner. When you have the same interest in her that you have in your guy friends there is no real problem. People get distant when they have new relationships, guys do that shit too, because the new partner and crazy sex is more interesting. It's natural. And when that shit ends they start to bitch about it on their friends. If that touchy feely shit annoys you tell her to cut that crap. If you don't really like her in the first place why were you ever hanging out with her?

just break the friendzone barrier user easy as hell only if you want the pussy tho say do you wanna jam out with your clam out and i will rock out with my cock out.

Girls almost always have an upgrade plan and a fallback plan. This means you're either the "next best thing" for her or the "make do" guy. It sounds like the latter in your case.

i would kick her out
not because she's a nigger but because she will dripping aids and herpes out of her pussy on my carpet

and maybe bc she's a nigger
yuck

Do it gradually, become less distant and less involved in her life. Pretend you are seeing someoen if she asks. Don't make a big deal about her being around you and if she gets clingy stay away at all costs.

This is the type of modern women you hear about when you read news articles about men committing suicide after losing their life savings despite not being married. She can STILL sue you for alimony even if you are never married. If you take on a parental figure to her future kid or live anywhere near her (even adjacent house) it can be argued in court. Google it.

Really you need this chick to fuck off from your life or you will seriously regret it. All the warning signs are staring you in the face user.

you are a Fluffer OP. I'm sorry :(

This. ITT soon this girl will have OP fluffing guys for her multiracial gangbangs.