So I work with Jessica Alba and know her personally. AMA

So I work with Jessica Alba and know her personally. AMA

What is your profession?

I am her and her husband's personal trainer.

So would you call yourself an aid to her? How many aids does someone as famous as her have?

I work in Consumer Goods. I work at the Honest Co.

...

What's better; Dollar Tree or Dollar General?

No, I'm an engineer, and I work at Honest Co.

Well, Cash is a decent enough guy, however Jess is a complete twat.

Dollar Tree by default... I have never been to Dollar General.

Do you make her go below parallel?

I disagree. JA is nice enough. She is pretty particular, but I agree that Cash is a cool guy

>engineer
>Honest Co
Nigga you silly!

Ayye this guy lifts

Seen any good movies lately?

E-commerce company we have an engineering team of about 30 people.

No lol. Although I did do a line off her tits once during an after-party in San Diego a year ago.

How much uglier is she IRL?

Not really, I'm going to see Spiderman Homecoming next week.

Where does she live? Address?
Strictly for research purposes, mind you.

The fact that she caught herpes from Derick Jeter really takes the bloom off the rose for me.

Most days she comes in looking pretty fucking hot. But she has her days where she is a 7/10 at best

/fit/izen reporting, senpai

Are you gay? (n-no homo)
Have you seen her nude?

man, even on her worst day she is still a 9

I don't have her new address (she recently moved)... But here is her old one...

1319N Beverly Drive,
Beverly Hills CA 90210

Is there any difference between Regular Unleaded and Mid Grade?

Octane rating

why did you post a pic for ants? do you know her from the other end of a telescope?

She was amazingly hot in her Flipper - Dark Angel period. However, her post Jeter/Herpes phase is 0/10.

I know, right? Fucking nigger...

she definitely never lived there. she is worth like hundreds of millions and you say she lives there. like the shittiest part of beverly hills in some shitty condo. nah, no way bruh.

What does she smell like and have you seen her toes? If so are they painted?

She smells great, and I have seen her toes plenty of times. Im not into feet, so I really haven't paid attention to weather or not she has them painted at any certain point. But I assume over the last 2 years she has had them painted.

>haven't paid attention to weather


it's raining, dickhead.

winds light to variable.

...

Why do you only shave your left goose egg?

I lost my right one fighting the Viet Kong. Damn gooks had me cornered.

When does Rick and Morty S3 start?

how's dem herps derek gave her?

Do you think Daenerys will reclaim the Iron Throne?

Chris said to tell you to get off of your phone and drop more fries or you are going to be working breakfast shift for the rest of the month.

He also said if you called him a sloppy cunt again you are going to have to put on the mascot outfit.