What's wrong, user? Is there something you'd like to talk about? I can sense it through your monitor. Here, take a seat

What's wrong, user? Is there something you'd like to talk about? I can sense it through your monitor. Here, take a seat.

I dont feel apart of anything you know, plus nonone is talking to me, i think i let them down

Well, why don't you go talk to them then?

When I get into a heated argument with a loved one. I enter this "mode" where I try to make the other person as angry or hurt as possible. I do this even after I've gotten my point across. Why do I do this?

They wont respond. I dont have real life contact with em

I'm a 23 year old kissless virgin, i went to my very first date tonight to watch this spiderman movie, just a few words have been said little to none eye contact, at the end she asked me if want to eat something, i said no and leave...she gave me a ride, i dont have a car, i'm smoking weed right know with no intentions to live anymore

I accidentally saved over my main game file that had over 60 hrs into it.
I also want to kms.

Anger issues, most likely. I suggest seeking out a doctor if they're a frequent problem.
I know you've probably heard this before, but there's plenty of fish in the sea. If she's not interested, she's not interested. She's not the right one for you. There's tons of girls out there that would probably love to hang out with you. You just have to find them. There's girl out there that are expirencing the same thing you are expirencing. Hey, you could even grow a bond with this certain someone and wallah. You just have to be confident. All it takes is some confidence and some determination.
Well that sucks. Sorry to hear about that. What game was it?

I met this really cool girl at a festival this past weekend and we clicked like crazy, she was into me and I was into her, but she lives in a different state and I'll probably never see her again

Does she have any form of social media? You could probably contact her through that.

Sometimes i think im a girl and then i look at myself and i just want to die
this happens every fucking month

Well, do you truly feel as if you're a woman? If so, you're probably transgender. Or does it fluxuate?

I didn't get it from her :( had to leave earlier than I thought. She's the first girl I've been interested in since my ex and I split almost a year ago

Fire Emblem Echoes
Thanks, this must sound pretty lame but Fire Emblem is really important to me personally. That's why I'm so bummed about losing that save data. I'll be alright tho, it's just a game after all.

That was just the drugs, either on your end, her end, or both.

Thanks user i took the courage to start dating this is hard for me, i guess you can't always start with the right foot?

Well that's shit. If you remember her name and what state she lives in, you could probably find her Facebook account or whichever platform she uses.
Fire Emblem is pretty fun. I haven't played it myself, but the soundtracks are amazing.

now that you mention it we were both on acid

Yeah, that's just life. But trust me. You'll find that one girl one day. I believe so. There's plenty of autistic losers out there that have gotten GFs. It's only a matter of time until you find yourself one. I remember my first GF. I was an autistic loser that had next to no friends and nearly everyone hated me, but this one girl was nice to me. She cared about me. It was one of the first times I've ever felt accepted. If I, a fat lonely unlikable loser can get a GF, you'll be able to get a GF.

It happens every month i suppress it untill i do something i percieve as feminine and then break down
kill me

Yes, I really love the soundtrack for Echoes in particular

I'd honestly suggest setting up some planes for horomone treatment. I don't really know that much about the whole hormones and transgender therapy stuff, but if you feel unconftorable in your own skin, wouldn't you want to change? You could become a 9/10 qt if you work hard for it.
I've been listening to the Fates OST for a bit now. I'd get Fire Emblem again if my 3DS didn't break.

Thanks user
That is what i needed

>again
Didn't mean to put that there. I'm retarded.

Np man. I like helping people. You seem like a pretty nice person.

my face is great actually i know because i've struggled with this for years and have obsessed over it.
i've talked to other trannies and they confirm similair feelings
but i'm a christian and i dont want to go to hell, i just want to be normal.

From what I've read in the Bible, God loves all of his children. I don't think he'd condemn you for switching genders. At least, I don't think. If God is real, he made you that way for a reason.

No he would, i'd be a catamite which were a heavily sinful people.
i hate my life and i hate myself i feel like i'm drowning

I often feel like punching myself in the stomach and the head, normally right after completely shutting down and staring at nothing for long periods of time. I feel crazy

i feel the same way (tranny guy here) but not the punching, the staring into nothing and shutting down
sounds like PTSD to me which is what i think i'm suffering from i'm not going to diagnose myself but i do have flashbacks during that time

Well I'm sorry you feel that way. But I'm sure you have a family that cares about you. Friends online/IRL that care about you. Also, was that written in the Old Testament or the new one? Idk that much about religion itself so sorry for that sense of ignorance I'm giving off.

I live in the south lad and am an orthodox christian, transgender is NOT allowed i could never come out

Is there something you're struggling with? Anything that's bothering you? Mentally or physically?
So your family wouldn't accept you? That's pretty harsh. If you were my friend, id accept you. I don't really care for gender/sexuality etc. I think what matters the most is personality. Have you ever talked to your parents about it? Maybe not relating to you, but just in general.

Ive tried to search it up, I think its a mixture between psychotic depression, PTSD, or just straight up depression. I dont normally have any thoughts during that time at all, just staring with a blank mind

It is hard for me to empathize with you as Im a straight dude and dont have much else going on there, but I certainly know there are many, many, many people out there like you...if not just on these boards, then elsewhere. I hope you find them and can relate with them

i mentioned the word gay around my grandpa when i was 9
thats the last time i talked about homosexuality or transgender or whatever without insulting it.
he was pretty harsh.

(tranny dude here) Yeah seems like a mix, you have any really traumatic events in life? i was abused and i still kind of flash back to it.

I mean, honestly, that's pretty rude of your grandpa. Although freedom of speech allows someone to say that type of stuff, I think they should keep it to themselves. They don't have to agree with homosexuality or LGTB+, but I think they should know better. Doesn't God want everyone to treat each other equally? Peace and love and whatnot. Not violence.

Ive got a long list. Im not sure I want to drone on about. Long story short:
>lived with mom for first ten years, abused by stepdad
>once moved to dads at 10, mom completely left my life
>felt abandoned for years
>stepmom loved me better than anyone
>stepmom now rots in bed all day due to several illnesses after having a mental break
>dad is depressed and trapped in poverty thanks to medical bills from stepmom
>siblings also depressed and I am guilty for not helping them
>recently broke up with the one girl that ever loved me, because I didnt love her
>recently finished high school and dont know what to do with myself

Agreed

God is pretty clear on homosexuality, masturbation transgender, etc. jesus said that pedos should be thrown into the sea with a big ass millstone around their neck (big stone meant to crush grain that took 3 men and a jackass to push) and sodom was destroyed.
i'd be burning in hell and i think i already will i just dont understand why i couldnt have been born normally?
I was beaten and saw my mother get beaten, i had to man up around 15 and get my drivers liscense and get to work so that we could live in a shitty apartment so my psychotic grandmother couldnt fuck with our heads, i had to be a father figure to my little brother all while being tortured inside and hating myself, i have no self respect and actively seek out dying
sometimes mid convo i'll just stop and stare into nothing my thoughts manifesting around me the same scene the same words the same songs playing on the panoramic screen infront of me untill i snap out of it

god i hate myself

I was drinking and smoking at the age of fucking 14 jesus christ

I,well.. graduated. But my grandma died of cancer 4 years before. Doc said she would live to see me walk across the stage. What a lier...

I do, come to find out my other grandma has demintia. She's real argumentitive about everything and always forget who I am.

Now we're stuck living with her (mind you, she's not diagnosed because she won't sign off on the mri) while she looses keys, misplaces her fucking gun and yells at us for not pitching in at every possible thing.

I'm gonna steal the cookie dough out of her fridge tomorrow. But the stress of that and the fact she didn't care enough to show up at graduation pisses me off.

And my friends don't helo when I get insulted every other time I talk to them

My problems are very mild in comparison, Im very sorry that all of that happened to you. I also started around that time.

I forgot to list that Ive also sat and...counseled? many of my friends who have had similar lives as you, or equally unfortunate in their own ways. Im unsure of your age, but, many of those friends I mentioned made it out alive. Some did not. I believe you can be one that lives

Damn, that sucks. I know what it feels like being the odd one out. Feeling un accepted. I'm sorry about your stepmom too. She seems like an amazing person. Have you ever tried talking to your dad? You could learn a lot from him. You'd probably learn things you never would've thought about after talking real with him. You should also contact your siblings. You shouldn't feel guilty for not helping them. You where going through a lot. Plus, there's still time left. Feel free to set up something with them and go hang out. Drink a beer or two. Liven up. Also, sorry about your GF. Shit sucks. But as I previously stated, if you don't love her or she doesn't love you, you weren't meant for each other. There's plenty of nice women out there. Trust me, you'll find the perfect girl one day. Also, as for you finishing high school, if you live in New York by any slim chance, Colleges are free now. Either way, try to get a decent job and earn enough money over time so you can have just enough to get enrolled into college. It's never too late to go to college.
I'm starting to get the feeling you were forced into being a Christian. Is that how you feel? Do you truly feel like you're accepted if you've been this mistreated by the religion?

Go out and try to help others in the medical field.

Some teachers are geinuenly nice and might help you with familyissues.

No i wasn't forced into be a christian, i saught Christ as my retribution from suicide it's the only thing keeping me alive anymore.
My family isnt even the same sect as me but it still wouldnt go down well, nobody wants a freak for a son.

I write shipping fanfiction.
I listen to girlfriend audios.
I have a three inch erection and I’m circumcised.
I have a huge fetish for cheerleaders. Once I went to a uni basketball game just to record the cheerleaders performing for a few minutes, after which I promptly left to jerk off to the footage.
I didn’t masturbate until I was 18 and can’t get off to naked women or porn. I last for about thirty seconds on average.
When I was younger, my dad used to shave me, cut my nails, trim my pubes, pop pimples on my face and back, and would smell my penis to make sure it smelled nice. He would also beat me if I ever denied him and took showers with me one several occasions.
Every weekend for the past four years, I’ve gone to the movies or taken a nap in my car and told my mom I was out with friends. I’ve also told her I’m dating a Korean girl named Kimberly who was in one of my uni classes.
I cheated my way to an A in an astronomy and video game course in uni. I bought a test answer key for the former and got a game from someone on Sup Forums for the latter. The professor in the gaming class thought I was some sort of programming prodigy even though I got a C in the intro compsci course
When I was younger I used to humiliate myself to make my friends laugh. Sometimes I used to take my pants off and dance around like an idiot because I have a small dick and it made them laugh. l intensely hate myself and will do pretty much anything to make people like me.
I also like the band Echosmith

Sorry about your grandmother. She's in a better place now. Also, my grandma has dementia too. It's horrible seeing what she's going through. She's forgetting so many things and she's calling a lot wondering things. She even needs an assistant now. Shit sucks man. Hope everything gets better.

Then again. I'm kinda pussy after my family scared me from doing everything...

From the end of the world to even looking at strangers, I can't go out for too long because I start to think of the worst of people and what they could do to me.

Greentext user here, Im going to go. Thank you all for talking. Good luck to you and goodnight.

Same to you too.. its hard to sleep here too.

Worried shell kill me in my sleep or kick my family out because of the slightest thing.

I would like to talk about my buns

are you the sad dad user?!?! no way

You're being too hard on yourself. You're not a "freak". You're just someone who doesn't feel right with themselves. So what if you're different? Being different is better than being your boring average Joe. You seem like a cool person. You shouldn't keep thinking these negative things about yourself. You're still a human being with emotions. I don't care what they say or tell you. You're still a person. You still have rights. Also, what if God isn't real? You'd be worrying about nothing. We don't know until death, so why not live your life to the fullest before you get your answer? You should worry about these types of things later. But just because you're transgendered doesn't mean you should think of yourself as a freak. You're perfectly fine right now. You shouldn't let anyone bring you down or tell you otherwise. Sorry, I got ahead of myself.
Yeah. Dementia fucking sucks. I wished they'd found a cure by now. Watching your loved ones slip away like that is heart breaking.

It would be, if my grandma didn't hate my mom, use me as a finincal spy on my family and always expects to be compensated for everything.

But i AM a freak normal people dont feel this way
either way i'd die at 40 i wish i was normal
I wish straight guys could understand what it's like but you wont and you never feel because unless you've felt the feeling you just wont know it
thats not being down on you guys or anything i just wish i could call myself one of you instead of this abomination of a freak mentally

Berating yourself won't get you anywhere. You only feel as if you're a freak because of what a book says and what these people have manipulated you into thinking. Just because you don't think "normally" doesn't mean you're a freak. I'm gay myself. I don't see myself as a freak. If I go to hell, I go to hell. And frankly, I don't care what "normal" people think about me honestly. You shouldn't either. It's your personal business. Not theirs. Also, does the Bible even say anything about transgenders? I thought it only said something about homosexuals. But if the Bible is real, I guess I'll be chilling in the lava hot tub waiting for you then. I'm not going to let some words on paper scare me from being who I want to be. If I go to hell, whatever. I want to live my life on Earth to the fullest extent. I'd rather worry about what the Bible says about me when I'm dying.

I wish i could describe the feeling of seeing something your entire life and not understanding why but just wanting to be IT and you know you can never be that, no matter what you do that chromosome never changes, those feet never get smaller those hands dont get less calloused

Oh, and define "normal". Everyone's different from each other in unique ways. Everyone acts and thinks differently. Nobody is ever truly "normal". I guess we're all freaks in our own way.
>you can never be that
Only if you hold yourself back from being what you want to be. You can be whoever you want to be. I believe you have the courage hidden deep inside of you to be who you want to be. If you want to be a women, be the best damn women there ever was and don't give any fucks about what anyone says about you. Honestly, I think you should get a nice job and gather enough money to move away from the south. Your family and life down there isn't working all that well for you. Start a new life. Pursue a career. New York has free education now, so going to college there will be extremely helpful for the future. I'm sorry if I came out as harsh. But, like I said before, just because you're not "normal" doesn't mean your a freak. Nobody is ever truly normal. You're not a freak because you feel a certain way. You're different. But shits ruff. It's just how life is.

>one of my best friends, lets call her Ashley
>Ashley likes John
>John basically being my brother at this point, bro for life
>Ive been crushing on Ashley for probably 6 months now
>convince myself its selfish to not try to hook them, since Ashley asked for help with John
>tonight John told me he had interest in Ashley
>tell him to go for it
>feel like shit and not sure to what degree i can handle them being together
>ive been HARD crushing on Ashley but never did anything cause knew she liked john
>feel like shit
>cant sleep
What do, if anything?

If it wasn't meant to be, it wasn't meant to be. Sucks that you can't be with Ashley, but she's happy with John. You could prolly become really good friends with her, but you have to eventually move on. It sucks, but that's just how life rolls. Sorry about your crush. Hope everything gets better.