What if Brady played soccer?

what if Brady played soccer?

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nobody would know him name and he would have wasted his life playing a game for women and children

Who's the fatty

>that filename
KEK

inb4:
CHI - CA- NO

> 0 - 7

> BUILD WALL

> NO ERA PENAL

> [generic racist slur]

tom brady

football season really shows how self centered you burger fucks are around sports. no one outside of the usa gives 2 shits about tom brady. meanwhile football (the sport where you actually kick a ball with ur foot instead of throwing it but still for some reason call it football) is the biggest fucking sport on the planet.

>5'11" and 6'0"

yea but we dont give a fuck about the rest of the world. you are all a bunch of whiny faggots. waah waaah america this america that. i dont even talk about other countries because i dont give a fuck what you guys do over there. learn from the champs kid.

Check out this edgelord.

>t. Trump voter

> we win because i don't care about the things you care about

Believe it or not, but there's more to this world than your trailer park.

So get off your sister and start exploring the world, user!

then he would be known worldwide

soccer is only the most popular sport because its literally the cheapest sport to play, it's for poor people.

all you need is a ball. hell it doesn't even have to be a ball, it can be any object. its not popular because its fun to watch, people watch it cause they're poor as fuck and grew up playing a poor sport for poor fucks.

you know if the US actually cared about soccer and dumped billions into the black people college farming programs we have in D1 football now we would have by far the best team in the world.

really good post

Makes sense then why it's so popular in Switzerland, Luxemborg, and Norway...

because they're not independent like us, they're surrounded by poor euro trash, they play the game that's popular, their followers.

like that other poster said, we don't give a fuck about other countries. we make our own sports - which are way more entertaining than watching grown men kick a ball around for a few hours only to have it end 1-1

here's your (You)

who are you trying to convince?

you are on fire today

he looks like an oompa loopma

handegg is only popular in the USA because you're all a bunch of anemic, unathletic, obese fuckers and throwing a ball around in the backyard doesn't take much effort

wont even get started on baseball because that's not a sport, just a minigame gimmick

by contrast playing football actually takes you running around for more than 10 seconds at a time so you can't handle it

missed one, mexcrement

Has McDonalds run out of burgers or why are Americans so butthurt today?

>Switzerland
>not independent

t. middle school dropout

maccas is shit

kfc > maccas

he's one of the slowest players in the nfl as it is. but he would thread that needle. what's the soccer position for slow and accurate?

Defensive midfielder or central back if he's built accordingly (can't be a manlet)

Well, or goalkeeper obviously if he has good reflexes.

>6'4"
>slow as fuck
>smart
>can make short accurate passes

central defender/defensive midfielder material

daily reminder that one of the best QB of all time couldnt even run a 5k only a single (1) year after retirement. he even said that at the time he got beat by old ladies at a 5k he was in better shape than when he was still active.

youtube.com/watch?v=Q4yNIATcwLU

They also exaggerate the height and weight of NFL and NBA players, because American sports are basically WWE style arrangements where large numbers excite them.

...

individual players report their own height and weight

el piojo is a legend, i wish we'd have gotten him for klinsmann replacement right after he got fired for punching the reporter. but oh well.

t. non- CHI

Yeah okay...

I'm 6'5, 245lbs then. 5% bodyfat.

these scouse webms never get old

CHI

He would own

cr7 made more in the last year than brady has made in his career (180 million)

GRONK!!!!

Please enjoy some (Yous) on the house. Hopefully they comfort you after getting your anus so twisted into a knot

White people are genetically superior

>implying the US wouldn't dominate soccer if people actually cared about it.
So you guys are telling me that while America is literally the best in the world at literally every other sport, if colleges and people spent money on soccer we wouldn't be the best? Lmao

>you're an athletic freak
>you have 2 options
>play soccer for literally less money than most lawyers make and be a literal who
OR
>play football and be paid millions and be a celebrity
Makes me think

>implying I'd still be a virgin if I actually cared about it
I'm just not trying, guys.

Yeah you could just pay money and fuck more girls than anyone, which is what the pats would do

>Lionel Messi

Oh, you motherfucker.

he's with us now fuck off

I'll give him some 'edge'
*whets katana*

...

The Kenyans are better long distance runners. Do you not care about that? Why do you care about sprinting but not long distance running?

>you're an athletic freak
Most of the NFL athletes wouldn't make it in soccer. A person is not just an amazing athlete and they're good at everything. Even within soccer we differentiate between different types of players: a CB is taller than the other players, a winger is faster. It's not just about having a good body for football. I'm sure it's the same with your football. Your understanding seems, at best, paltry.

This is the example which destroys your argument: Take Usain Bolt. Is he a freak? Indubitably. Would he have been able to be a world-class shot-putter? Absolutely not.

To respond to the OP:
It follows that Tom Brady would have been rubbish in soccer but so would have Messi been in American Football.

...

He would be a center-back for a bundesliga 2 side.

>Indubitably

he'd still be a fine piece of ass

That's what years and years of getting the shit beat out of you and abusing painkillers will do to you

Also,
>Brott Fovre
>le spam the pass button man
>one of the best
KEK

you are literally retarded

Not over here mate. Fuck but I miss KFC back in Australia. Popeyes is god-tier though.

I don't like this thread very much

>defensive midfielder
That's the QB role.

This guy sounds like a total douche but is essentially right. I can count on one hand the times I have thought about another country this week. It's just not revelvant to my life.

>posts facts
>b-but muh ad hominem
Ebin

I didn't think about the USA this week either. Why would I do that?

>itt

made me laff

I've seen him play for years and while I think he's a an elite qb I don't think he would translate well to soccer

I agree with you on the comparisons. I'm not the guy you are responding to.

However, I think American football is the best overall sport in terms of displaying raw athletic talent that is heavily specified to particular position, combined with the overall strategy of utilizing a lot of very specific athletic abilities. It's the dynamism that I enjoy most.

Sure every sport has strategy, but no other major sport has the kind of diversity of skills, and the management thereof, at such a high level of play, to fully entertain me.

Yuros always point to "muh ads" but that's a critique on the way the game is distributed and viewed, not the the game itself. Watching condensed football games with all of the ads is wildly entertaining.

Also it's violent as fuck and I want me some gladiators!!!

That is the best comparison photo of inbred UK'er vs a purebred American.

You know purebreds are usually inbreds? You dumb fuck
>the city of you

saving

Now that's a rare Brady.

>all the emotionally devastated Eurohomos ITT bothered by how inward focused American culture is
>This dude getting 1001 replies by bitter third worlders for stating the painful truth

Seriously, i'm genuinely curious; if you guys really care little for and aren't obsessed with the US, then why do Europeans seem so extremely outraged at how solipsistic America as a nation is? There are 200+ countries here on this rock and you seem inordinately bothered by the fact that one them is populated by a bunch of people who think little of the rest of the world. Why does this cause so much bootyblast? It's literally nothing more than an honest and benevolent indifference.

Heck i'll even throw you a bone and accept that a large part of is due to ignorance which directs me back to the question, why do you all cry about it?

This, every single European could die tomorrow and I wouldn't care. If somebody paid me $100 to nuke the continent out of existence, I'd do it happily.

..ehhhhhh not sure about nuking Euroland(the old world has beautiful architecture that should be preserved tbhm8).

sensing a lot of anger itt

How much burgers would you buy yourself

The next manager of the English National Team

>learn from the champs kid
School shooting world champs?
Obesity world champs?
Narrowing your elections down to the two worst possible choices world champs?
Being overrun by niggers world champs?

sounds like you got issues kids. are you sure you don't wanna talk about your perverted homoerotic fantasies with a competent doctor who might help you

good post

Europeans have a really severe inferiority complex about Americans.

>its literally the cheapest sport to play

Running is.

it's literally the other way around

The perennial obsession, the catty sniping, the ego-defensive smugness and the bizarre inability to dismiss America entirely and focus on other matters all come together to suggest a lot about Euro feelings about America. For once, borrow a leaf from Americans and stop being preoccupied with the daily goings on of some country thousands of miles away.

what position would he even play anyway?

he'd have been a decent backup keeper for a league one side lad

But what is that athletic talent? Running fast OR being a brick shithouse? Or the odd player who throws a ball well (towards people who run fast, protected by brickshithouses)?

>being preoccupied with the daily goings on of some country thousands of miles away
>what is America famous for
do you get why most countries have a general disdain for America yet m8?

brady's 39, at this point l doubt he has the speed and agility for soccer

if he played now he'd be a league 2 defender or something

>this question
My point exactly. You seem to equate the highest reaches of US government with the average small town yokel, so I don't think you can appreciate just how little the average person here cares for anything that happens outside of their state, let alone foreign & international affairs.

And africans dominate the marathons, you're proving his point

>Soccer faggot on the left's shirt
>adidas
>movistar
>Banamex
>Coca-Cola
>P&G

>Superior Football athlete on the right's shirt
>PATRIOTS
>FOOTBALL

>Banamex
I can get behind this

>handegg get sponsors because nobody watches it

my sides!!!!!

do you know how advertising works or am I being rused?

this whole thread can be thus summarized

>americans so accustomed to ads they know the intricacies of them all

kek!!!!!!!!!!

>brit made so accustomed to the Islamic sharia law he has forgotten his original ways of freedom and capitalism

Sad!

Looks like you completely contradicted your point here I can act like a retard and still outsmart you.

This is not meYou limey tard-babby