What would happen to me if the theater staff caught me sneaking food into the theater?

What would happen to me if the theater staff caught me sneaking food into the theater?

have to stand outside front door with nothing but a burlap sack on, with a hole for just your penis to stick out

it's not fun

Over here, the incident will be recorded and, if a frequent offender, the guards will escort you outside behind the cinema to beat you with batons.

How do you put all the snacks in the bottom of the popcorn. Don't you have to buy it?

They can't do shit. Just dont bring it in a backpack, made that mistake once and they stopped me. Probably thought I was going to go James Holmes on them.

i can just take anything they dont care here

Why don't you just put it in your pockets when entering the kino?

I've walked into a theater with a big bag of KFC before no one said shit.

Most don't care, but its easy info to just have stuff in a bag, or get some cargo pants just for movies

It's easier if you bring a girl with you. Purses are perfect for sneaking shit in and the staff isn't gonna rummage through a normal sized women's purse. If you wear a large sized coat you better be wearing a suit under it or they'll get suspicious.

All the shit you bring to eat is going to melt, good luck with that.

they send you to the popcorn mines...

Are Americans really not allowed to bring food into the cinema?

I thought it was the land of the free

>2016
>get stopped everytime I try to sneak chicken wings in my pockets
>mfw

(kek)

I usually sneak in a beef on weck or Reuben under my cowboy hat. Never had any problems.

Just have your girlfriend put it in her purse you morons.

you have to be fucking retarded to get "caught"

That works at the convenience store though
When I was younger I'd put a bunch of chocolate bars in a slushie cup and fill the top up with slushie to hide them.

I don't even try to hide my food anymore. I ask them if I can finish my "lunch/dinner" in the lobby before the feature. They always say yes. I walk in and straight to my theater seat.

What?
Don't listen to that user the bag in the best cover ever. Just fill it with your clothes from the gym make sure they're wet and slightly smelly or at least look used throw in a pair of smelly sneakers and hide all the snacks under the items in a bag and you ducking golden.
Or if you have a girlfriend tell her to sneak it in her purse they almost never check woman's purses. I've snuck Chinese food in the theaters before it's an art user.

Also to answer your question they'd probably ask you do do something with the items before you enter.

Solid memery, m'lad. Plenty dank. You're going places!

No shower privileges
No falcon day care
No pre show crab tasting
No complimentary single tickets
No personal valet to park your car
Just think before you do it user, it's not worth the punishment

>land of the free

Exactly. Where companies are free to be price gouging shits

They'll revoke your shower license.

Anvil polishing for a month!

don't do this, I told my bb to hide a mars bar in her coochie and she didn't give it back

At my local theater, there is really hot air blowing near the enterance to the lobby so that any candy you have hidden on you melts.

If you manage to salvage your candy, and if they suspect you any further, the security officers will follow you blowing hot air from their portable hair dryers onto you.

wait wait, are americans really not allowed to take their own food into a theater? Holy fuck that's hilarious.

>ufw americans will never know the joy of taking in an entire plastic shopping bag full of lollies and shit into a theatre

I routinely bring KFC or Burger king into the cinema

Took some KFC into the art-house cinema and spilled gravy on myself

>Going to the theatre instead of watching kinos on the comfiness of your bedroom or living room.

> in case you say you are on a date in telling you you will never score if a girl sees you sneaking food instead of buying it at the place.

I took one of the cinema's jumbo soda cups home with me, the next time I went there I filled it up with scrambled eggs and snuck 'em in.

Thanks, I know it was only a couple layers of irony but I got two (You)'s so hey! Perfect birthday gift!

>newfags trying to greentext
>newfags telling me what to do

no!

Why not just pocket them at that point you nigger.

mad waggie detected

Just buy a bucket of crab legs from Robert when you get there. No need to invoke the wrath of the designated shooter.

You'll get your theater shower pass taken away.

>it's an Americans can't go 2 hours without shoving processed sugars and saturated fats into their mouths thread

Don't you think they'll suspect that?
Plus you can fit a lot of them in the extra large cup

>it's an user can't sit still to watch a movie without stuffing his face full of junk food the entire time

I used to smuggle them in a stuffed falcon on my shoulder that had fishline tied to various parts of it's body connected to my fingers incase the staff got suspicious, i'm also a talented ventriloquist so that helped too.

Having to swiftly leave once the falcon wars broke out became problematic over the years so I purchased a small agile falcon and I make him wear a home-made falcon suit lined with pockets for milkybars.

You think that's bad, I went on a trip to the States and one of the cinemas literally had a seat in each corner that was just a veritable padded toilet seat with a huge bucket under it. Clapistanis literally can't sit through an hour and a half film without stuffing their faces and shitting.

>it's a europoor can't afford delicious snacks and sugary delights to enjoy with their film

What do you mean sneaking?

Who the fuck buys food at the cinema? Who the fuck sneaks it in?

Penis inspection in front of the entire lobby.

It's terrible.

In the UK you can literally walk in with a backpack full of food and drink

>cinema

OP clearly mentioned its a theater

popcorn is food

So you only eat chocolate?

Depends on the Cinema Magistrate, but generally 4 to 6 months in the Cinema Detention Center. My buddy served 2 months for not silencing his cellphone before the kino began (if it was a flick, he would have gotten off with a fine) and he said he saw another inmate go crazy and drown himself in the Coca Cola vats on Christmas Day.

>photo is dated today
user, why?