Im losing my virginity to a hooker tmrw lads

Im losing my virginity to a hooker tmrw lads.
Any advice?

Nice job op, use condoms

get ready to get an std

Offer her a salad as payment
>You'll thank me later dude.

What's the difference between a hooker and escort ?

Don't

triple layer condoms

Chris dont

its like high school football vs dudes with super bowl rings

escorts like themselves (they talk, tease, fuck, chill)
hookers dirty and have low self-esteem ("lets get it over with" *acts like having good time*)

Make sure you start off with, "I'M A VIRGIN"

have fun, but don't fall in love

Honestly not worth it. Lost my virginity to a town slut and it was really awkward and unenjoyable. I've had sex with three hookers since and every time I go to see a new one I tell myself it'll be better than the last girl.

Spoiler alert: it never is

How do you get one and how much?
I'm considering too, help user

Just relax and try not to be awkward.

Also bear in mind first times are always shit. Yours will be no exception.

Be prepared to be let down

Um should i make small talk?

Don't be a dumb cunt.

Post pic of said hooker

Remember to gargle the balls

Before cumming it's important to warn her so she can prepare, here are some examples of appropriate warnings
>It's slime time
>and boom goes the dynamite
> Shazam
> long live the king
> this one's for you mom and dad

Don't get shafted and don't go bareback. That's all the tips you need, right?

Dont be this user

Worth reading kek

Fucking bumping

Hey literally type in google maps "legal brothels in whatever city", go to said place and talk to the manager

Not OP, use backpage. Every city is different but for an hour anything over 200 and your getting robbed

make sure you dont wear a condom so it feels better

>live in country where it's legal
>they have to be tested and stuff
>be 28 year old virgin
>still never felt the need to pay for sex
>all these pop-culture memes about desperate nerds and virginity being a big deal
>feels weird, don't really care.

should I just do it to see what it's like? I mean I jerk off and stuff, how much better could sex possibly be?

If you're really used to jerking off, which you are, prepare for disappointment. Good porn is actually way better.

I tend to prefer
>Things are gonna get messy
>Time for your Cummuppance
>Here I cum
>You've earned this

Sex is not like jerking off. At first is fucking nice, but it wears off very quick. Masturbation is quick. Can do it anytime for free. Don't have to dress nice, get money, get out of the house or trust your penis to a person that don't know how sensitive you are.

If you're not an emotional faggot that will lose sleep over "I wish I waited for a special someone" stuff, then I say go for it. Get your curiosity out of the way.

But if you're unsure then just don't. Trust me, everyone gets fucked at some point in their lives. You can't escape it.

>giving some cumdump whore your virginity

that is just as bad as continuing to be a virgin OP

>everyone gets fucked at some point in their lives. You can't escape it.

kek

Yeah but by the time im in my middle age and successful, when bitches start aging like milk, is when theyll want to have sex with me - its just the same as giving a cumdump your virginity anyways.

Besides dating/courting is just discrete and indirect prostitution

I mean by the time its my turn bitches wouldve already had 20 or so guys fucked them already. Aint nobody got time fo them beef flaps

Take that money and buy weed with it
It'll feel good longer and won't give you herpes

Kissless virgin neckbeard detected

Doon't wear a condom. STDs are a myth. Don't forget to haggle.

Is that your excuse for being too scared to go out on a date?

Ive already been on a date, infact the thot was the one who asked out

Literally wasted 1-2 hours of my life and around 50 bucks for two hugs

Tell me a bit about backpage.
I still live with parents, so they can't come over. Are there services where I can go to their place? Also, how legit are these?

>tfw too beta even for whores

>projecting this hard
Alrighty, user.

Yeah, there are. Usually its just at some motel or something, and from what ive heard theyre pretty legit. The girl will usually have it in the description if they want u to come over or they will come to u

Dont do it m8

>incall
You go to them
>outcall
They come to you

Make sure that you google their phone number. See if there are any public reviews/discussion on escort forums. Reverse google search the images, make sure you talk on the phone, try not to get mugged/arrested.

wrap it twice.

>mugged or arrested
Shit
Advice on how to avoid all that?
You done this before? Experiences?

How old are you if I may ask? It is never too late to lose your virginity to a girl who is not a hooker/escort/pityfuck.

Nice one dude. Pretty solid advice

Never heard of anyone who it's happened to, if you are careful and cover your ass you should be fine.

Hey guys I have nothing to do with this but I drew a clown

It's a nice clown, but can you put another page under it and draw more of the clown? Plz post updates

Don't take the day
That have bid pussy,u wouldn't feel a thing.
Trust me I know

Russian slut, paid 140$ for a night.
1/3

Why aren't you living in saint Petersburg and fucking cheap hookers

...

3/3

If they take you into the shower, don't pee in it.

Good comeback man, only acknowledges my findings.

>any advice

Yeah don't. Sex isn't that big of a deal and a hooker will make it a Fuckton less special for you.

As a male beta virgin, Ive learnt a lot from this post. Thanks user

Like?

I will wait a bit more until i lose my virginity with a whore. I'm 27 right now :/

Why would you do this? Just jerk off, it's cheaper. Nobody gives a shit if you've "lost your virginity".

Godspeed user
20yr old over and out

I get laid regularly by girls my age but have a thing for milfs
So I found an escort who's 38 looks like a slightly older version of pic related and hit her up on a whim
I'm 24
120 half hour or 200 an hour
She sorta likes me and is into the whole young guy milf thing. We roleplay and do a lot of shit she's into also. Always end up staying a lot longer than I pay for and she never says anything because I bring 2 joints, we smoke one I leave her one. After the smoke we derp around in the shower per her request then get to business.

So yeah pro tip; get you a nice big titty older lady who will take care of you. She makes me nut like no other can

bump