Shit you wish you didn't say while you were trashed discussion?

Shit you wish you didn't say while you were trashed discussion?

>be me
>be 19
>get home really drunk one night
>ask sister to give me oral

that really wasn't my finest moment

How'd it go?

she didn't say aanything, just got up and stormed off to her room and slammed the door

breakfast next morning was kinda awkward too

Proposed to rim a random guy....he was down for it and I rimmed that asshole for an hour

Geez, people are so uptight. But really, this shit is why I stopped drinking. It makes you stupid. Wound up in jail twice in one week. Had to reassess how I was doing things. I've never looked back and have 0 regrets about the decision to quit.

I'll start, ass I downed a bottle of henny my slow loss of consciousness slowly turned into tornado of slurred words. So the people I'm drinking with(who are at about a 5-7 while I'm sky high into 13) decide to let me spark up conversation and well I was for some reason thinking about having a 3 way with my parents friends daughter(she's like 23) and my SO. With that being said I ask the 23 year old out of the fucking blue how her pussy game is(keep in mind I don't remember ANY of this) and so as I asked she actually answers(dope af) then turn to my SO who is not at all down for anything like that. I go through the night wearily and wake up with a PISSED significant other. I then explain I had no recollection and spend whole day apologizing till she gets over it and tells me what happened.

Same here, I quit drinking after I jumped out of a moving taxi while pissed out of my head. Realised I was an alcoholic and incapable of drinking socially so I just had to stop it completely. Otherwise I was heading for a life of alcohol dependency.

Kek

I hope you don't speak like that irl, dudebrah.

Nothing, cause I'm not an asshole.

faggot

This guy introduced himself to me and my brother at the bar as a Virginia tech alumni and I looked him in the eyes and said don't shoot plz

>be 19
>at best friends surprise birthday party
>late into the night he calls me into the bathroom
>I'm delirious
>walk in and his gf pulls down pants and starts sucking my whiskey dick something fierce
>get blood flow
>it's my turn
>going ham on his gf, she screaming
>just an accidental nut from hell(she knows)
>friend: "dude you didn't cum in her right?"
>me: "nah my dick died"
>wake up thinking it was a bad dream
>its reality
>months go by I'm in the clear
>untold truth between me and his gf to this day we've never talked about it.

Kek 2.0

I can just handle my alcohol little boy; although I do turn into a massive flirt.

realized that my life was going nowhere and tried to end it in front of a romantic interest. Never spoke to me again..

>be me
>be 17
>have older cousin, he's 21 then
>he has an almost perfect girlfriend
>8/10 looks on a bad day, rich af, not a high maintenance cunt
>likes sex, likes giving head even more
>shes smart too
>when cousin tries to make fun of her cus he has a complex, she slaps her down
>he cant handle a woman smarter than him (his wife today is a basic bitch)
>me and cousin hang out a lot together, more like bros than cousins
>get to know his gf more, call her C
>C is 4 years older than me but we have much better discussions than C and my cousin do
>cousin is fine with it, he just wanted to play turrent defense on Starcraft
>eventually we get closer
>she comes out and says shes got feelings for me
>i tell her the same, and i know im in home base so i say "and i want my face between your tits"
>cousin on starcraft, oblivious
>C tells me to meet her in the backyard in 10 mins
>meet her, got a bikini on that cant hold back those big dirty milkers
>titfuck, oral happens
>a week later we're fucking
>fast forward like 2 months later
>at a party for our friend, call him B
>i do 24 jello shots in like 15 minutes
>C is there, she wants to smash but had to go get ready
>cousin comes up to me, drunk talk
>"yeah man she seems so distant now. shes avoiding time with me"
>im baby steps from blackout drunk so i blurt out
>THATS COSS WE BEEN FUCKEEEEN FER LIKE TWO MONTHS
>the fury
>whole party goes silent, even inside the house
>cousin yells "C! WHERE ARE YOU!"
>people ask me if im for real
>i tell them ive emptied my balls in her like 100 times
>cousin hates me (we eventually make up)
>C hates me (prolly shouldve handled that better)

And that's why you don't do jello shots.

Smart move. Glad you survived

I told my other friends that i fucked my friends gf, he still dosent know

lol i had more or less the same with my gfs best friend when we got drunk af and i still cant remember it

Got wasted at work (company party) told about 30 co-workers I hated them and that I wanted to burn them all inside the office building.

I don't work there anymore..

>be me
>posting on Sup Forums thread about drunk shenanigans
>spell "turret" "turrent"
>ohshitniggawhatdidijustsay.bmp

And that's why I don't drink goldschlager

>be me late friday night
>been hitting the pubs pretty hard with my buddies
>had a 5th of vodka and some beers
>on our way downtown someone had painted Hitler on a wall in manga style
(now I don't remember this part so it's just eye witness accounts from friends and police)
>I took my shirt off, walked around in the goose step salute screaming HEIL HITLER
>over and over
>police arrived, I ran
>head first into a street pole/light....
>woke up in the hospital
>got around 500 euro in tickets for racial slurs and being an idiot

Told my university teacher (math) that I wanted to piss on her leg after about 8-9 shots & 5 beers

Her response was, uhh what you'd expect..

This bitch friendzoned me and I asked her to fuck off from my life

>I love you

...

Admitted to one roommate that I fucked our other roommate's brother while we were on vacation. At some point he's going to fuck up and tell her, I just know it.

Why do white people always go nazi when drunk...

QUADS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fuck off you fat ugly nigger.

Me and my friends hit a club got shitfaced did some blow at 5am we left the club and saw this nigger. My friend decides fuck this nigger and just storms him and tackles him to the ground. This nigger is mad as fuck so he gets up and swings at my friend this turned shit serious and we got mad as fuck, we basically fucked this nigger up 3v1 poor guy and left him there. I still feel awful till this day as I remember his screams of pain. If youre out there nignog I am sorry.

Trying to interpret the meaning of these quads... should I try to fuck him again? Steal him from his girlfriend? Stay the fuck away?

>should I try to fuck him again? Steal him from his girlfriend? Stay the fuck away?
All of the above.

The quads have spoken. I shall see if an affair is feasible, rather that leaving it as a vacation fling. If not I'll fuck off and let it be.

your best friend let you fuck his woman at HIS surprise party? Thats a new level of cuck.