Finishing off half a bottle of this to deal with ending things with someone I've been in love with for about a decade...

Finishing off half a bottle of this to deal with ending things with someone I've been in love with for about a decade. AMA!

Aww man, I love scotch! It tastes like a happy day. Why did she end it? Did you change? Were you distant? Always stupid shit like that.

Scotch is happiness.

Naw. We've been on and off and just best friends for years, things repeatedly sparking and dying off due to various reasons.

Last attempt was me taking this as seriously as possible. We gave it a chance but she didn't feel it, ended with us realizing we can't remain friends due to the chemistry between us.

>we can't remain friends due to the chemistry between us.

That's what makes friends tho

Couldn't you drown your sorrows on something a little better?

I mean, fuck. Get something worth a couple hundred bucks to wash the bad taste out of your mouth and soul.

Ex wife called it quits after 12 years. Thank god we had no children. At first she had a great time hooking up with younger guys and partying. Then it became complicated for her.

For me, 2 years of no dating anyone. I refused to mope around though. Worked out, got into the best shape of my life. Then, the unexpected: a rain- make tha a downpour of pussy on me.

Go to Starbucks, get numbers. Library, numbers. At work, numbers. Dated a lot, fucked a lot, then found a 8/10 red head 5 years younger than I wanting kids and marriage. Why the fuck not.

We're engaged. The ex became a fat ass who would occasionally asks me if I don't miss what we had. She stopped calling after I told her: "you killed the man you married. I'd offer you my condolences but out of respect for his memory, I'll just pass along his message to you: enjoy your life and good luck, but I doubt you'll find someone else who'll look you in the eye, say they love you, and mean it."

Things fell apart because I wanted a relationship, and (it felt like, at least) that she was afraid of giving it a go to avoid hurting me if she didn't feel it.

She's an exceptionally caring person, which is what attracted me to her so much. The ironic bit is that to avoid hurting me she distanced herself, which meant she was not giving it a real chance and in turn caused me to distance myself.

Being herself would've just caused me to fall in love with her more - which is why we couldn't remain in friendly terms.

Working out and trying to ride it out.
Good scotch is for sipping and enjoying. Cheap scotch is for cleansing the soul after downing a bottle with no remorse.

My man.

A redhead AND a perfect revenge comeback.

>buying shit whisky

see

You might as well have bought paint thinner though.

A few 40s of whatever was cheap would have been better for that purpose

Only half a bottle? Go hard.

>Even replying to her.

Why?

Cut contact. we're not communicating.

Yet you had to have the last word. Not even worth it bud, who cares?

GF of 4 years left me about 9 months ago. honestly the worst and hardest thing ive ever been through..

couldnt imagine the loss of a 10 year. i feel for you user. hope it gets better for you. love is rough.

im taking a shot for you right now

Mateeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!! Guess what? I've just gone to get Bell's as I've finally decided to give up on some girl I've been on off with for two years.

It's not as bad, but I have to deal with her every day at work and it's a constant headfuck.

I've been brain training for about a year, but it starts up again. Finally... I think finally, I've completely given up.

The good times give me a shitload of pleasure.

The bad times give me double the misery.

I'll raise a glass.

Well not a glass, a bottle.

Lots of assumptions, very little connection to reality.

Sup Forums is proving to be surprisingly helpful.

Quick, someone post a dick pic and call me a pansy so I don't think this place has gone completely to shit.

Meaning?

:D The only reason I came back to Sup Forums was to help me out. There's a grimness to it and loads of bad shit, but when you need a balance of twattery and enlightenment, there's no better place.

Can't deny, I fucking love Sup Forums

You get used to the heartbreak after a while. The main thing is the finality of it all this time around - there's a gap left in you of a person that's been there for most of your adult life and of a life that's suddenly stricken out.

Oh man, I had the same problem with my girl. In the end we end up like kinda friends, I wanted a relationship and she didn't even tho she always says to me she loves me she don't want to hurt me.
I just love her and because of that we split up before we end up hating each other. I truly love her and care for her so I'm just hope she find happiness even if I'm not part of it, I feel like shit when I remember her tho
>Why live anons

God, at least I have the luxury of avoiding her in my life. Can't imagine what it's like to have to see her daily.

Cheers on that bottle.

yeah i could imagine..

i lived with my ex 3 and a half of the years. the most time spent apart was like a week. we were best friends. it hurts everyday and i dream about her a lot. i suppose it may or may not be completely over but i try not to think about it.

if this is OP, would you say the dragging it on and being on and off for 10 years was a good or bad idea?

>>Why live anons
We live because we realize we want to find that thing again with someone who appreciates it and gives it back.

I always had 'an hero' as an option in case things just went completely to shit but one of the positive things I've taken away from this ordeal is that it is no longer an option for me. I keep going because I know that my goal is to have that, and have it right.

Yes? No?

>Mfw I have to see the girl everyday in uni
>Well fuck me backwards then

Good for you!

It was mostly a good idea. I can't say we ever had a real chance in the past - we were both not grown up enough to actually have this work out as a life-long thing. This time we were both in that place where we knew what we wanted and were ready for it, finally. And it didn't work out.

I mostly have good days, this shit day is due to a dream so I really understand you on that point.

You are absolutely right my man, what's hurt the most of my situation is that I really love that girl, that means that I genuinely cared and I gonna be happy if she's happy. The sad part is that I'm not part of her happiness
But as you say we all want to feel this again and feel this right with the right person that's the difficult part

...

patience man..

thats all there is to it.

Trips of feels

OP here. Honestly started this thread because I thought some shits&giggles about this would make me feel better, but Sup Forums has provided a rare moment of camaraderie and actual support.

I honestly appreciate it, fellow anons. You've proven what this place can be.

Hope you and I find that special person user

I know what you mean.

This thing is weeks-fresh for me, so I'm still dealing with a lot of anger and resentment which are really no fault of her own and I'm trying to deal through myself.. I know I ultimately feel that way, even if I believe that her ultimate happiness would've been with me.

How cannot one emphasize with a bro going through the same shit we are. Be strong my man there's always tomorrow and you don't know what could happen, at least that's what I tell myself

In the end we are still alone even if we are in a place full with people, that is why we don't feel like belong anywhere.
>Tfw she makes you feel otherwise
>Tfw she just leave and the feeling of emptiness came harder than ever
>Mfw

good luck to all of us heartbroken anons.

its not so bad, things could be way worse i suppose.

one thing that this experience hast taught me is that if someone wants to walk out of your life you have to let them, i allowed myself to try to get her back and talk to her a few times but it never got me anywhere, made me feel worse. etc etc. after the break up it went on for a couple months, hooking up etc etc but it was all bullshit. i was weak and naive. but back to the point, you have to let them leave. dont waste time on people that dont give a fuck, gotta focus on the people that care and are there to help. but it is tough to accept the cold sudden change of their attitude, like, how could she not care? how is she doing this? etc etc. the thing is i probably will never know, ill never understand. thats it. with that, i raise another shot. again, good luck anons. itll all work out how its supposed to in the end.

now we gotta bitching like beta cucks

I bet she is an East Coaster, they are practically English.

I also just came out of a 10 yr relationship. 2 kids. They all live in a diff country with her mom at the minute. Mutual decision but miss the kids a lot. Ah well.

Well said user, the only answer is to focus on the people that really matters and going to be with us when the chips are down, just gotta suffer a little to find out which one is worth suffer for

Oh god, is like the three of the afternoon and I have a test tomorrow but I would kill for a drink right now

>it's true Watches at 0 $?

dont look at their social medias. try to avoid their texts and calls. thats all i can say.

Yes, I never looked at her social media after all this

honestly try you best to avoid it.

IT WILL HURT AND IT WILL PISS YOU OFF

It's a killer. Every day, to have to converse with her, looking into her eyes, the smell of her still bringing back the good times. Her smile in particular - she lit me up with it.

She plays the old 1/2 game - she'd been messing me around, acting nonchalant, disinterested and crowded, then when I start to drop off she'll call me so many nice things, make a real fuss, let me fuck her good and proper, do things together and then repeat the cycle.
I'd been cooling off for a while, even more properly last week. Then she starts to overdo the niceness in a fawning way.

I didn't speak to her for most of the week, if I could help it. Didn't even try to speak to her over the weekend.

I get to this morning, get an email from her:

"Hi lovely :)

How are you?

"

Then I thought to myself, you know what... through the good times and the shit times, she's barely ever even given a shit about how I am. Barely ever even asked me.

Then I thought, shit - I'm a fucking puppy dog. I'm one of those faggots that I've never, ever been in my 32 years on this planet.

So, no, fuck it, I'm done. She's so lovely and she's amazing in every way, but I ain't fagging myself out for anyone.

I find the thing we're most afraid of is burning the bridge in case one day she'll have a change of mind. Which is complete nonsense, and you know it, despite the self deceiving denial that comes with that.

The best thing you could do is reply to her with exactly that - That through the good times and the shit times she's barely ever given a shit about how you are. Burn that bridge and never look back - it'll feel wrong at first, but with a burning bridge behind you the only way you'll have is forward.

Oh man, you are her lifesaver boat.
She only use you when she have a need for dick, don't get me wrong this is great but if am I reading well you love her and this dynamic only going to generate pain to you so.
>Get out

exactly.. shes using you
my ex did the same shit for 4 months after the breakup they act like they dont know what theyre doing but they know.. it is some puppy dog shit. they just want validation and they want to have their cake and eat it too. its pathetic and its hard to not be a part of their life but its honestly the right thing to do. you have to let that shit go user. shes pimpin your feelings. women are low key pretty powerful sometimes.

Run while still can user, she is gonna drain every drop of your emotions until there's nothing less. She's using you to get her confidence high

Damn, anons, Sup Forums I'm going as soft as OP. Thank you sincerely for this - I don't get to talk to my friends too much about it, because they all know her and the extent of my feelings would shock them a bit, because I've kept little parts a secret.

The fact that you're saying what I'm thinking really. Fuck. I feel like a little weight has been lifted.

I may even 'borrow' my housemate's cash card and go out drinking.

You don't know the full story.

Do that user, as they said "the alcohol is to sanitize the wounds of the heart".
Just to get all that rage and anger out, even buy a pack of your favorite cigarettes and take a night for yourself, forgetting about it all.
You'll feel better in the morning after

OP here. Sometimes advising someone else with the same problems helps you verbalize the advise you can't give to yourself. There's healing in helping.

Today may very well be the death rattle of me holding on to her, through this post and its replies.

Cheers user, I'm going to do it.

Good luck. It's going to be tough. I loved mine so much, but I never invested in the way that you have.

It's such a long time to be with someone, even on and off. When pain outweighs joy, something's got to happen.

We're only here once - there's billions of us... do we really want one iota of shite, when there's such possibilities of happiness out there?

Fuck do we. It's shithouse. You know what? There's no way that I'd have made anyone feel the way she has made me feel at times.

I was a cunt when I was younger but I still had a sense of decency enough to just end things, rather than death by 1000 cuts.

It's bullshit.

Drop it for good.

I definitely am.

hahaha my man, grants is my go-to if I want to drown my sorrows out!

enjoy, amigo.

Nice taste, OP! For once you're not a faggot!

I dated a girl for a while, completely ruined me.
If she insists that hanging out once a week is enough even when you guys get serious, thats a no no.
If she has guy friends, also a no no.(sounds cliche but seriously, girls can swim in cock if they want to)
If her snap score is over 200k, shes a ho ho.
I once got in a argument on whether or not i'd be okay with dating a pornstar because she gets fucked by other people and she was on the defense saying that its just a job. That was a red flag right there.
This girl I mentioned was snapping like 4 different guys all within the time frame we were dating, ranging from talking about cuddling and sex.
When I looked at her phone and called her out on it, she told me I should leave. As I was putting my shoes on and almost out the door, she walked into her bathroom and was apparently gonna swallow a handfull of pills, which looking back on it was a shitty attempt to try and make this about her.
This was a half and half rant and informative reply

None of the above. She wasn't toxic - any of that would've caused me to drop her and made this entire thing a lot easier.

The reason this is difficult is that she was actually marriage material. Up until a couple of months ago I wasn't even in the mindset of marriage and family - she was the one to make me believe that those are things I actually want with someone who proves to be good for it.

>I dated a girl for a while, completely ruined me.
>If she insists that hanging out once a week is enough even when you guys get serious, thats a no no.
>If she has guy friends, also a no no.(sounds cliche but seriously, girls can swim in cock if they want to)
>If her snap score is over 200k, shes a ho ho.
>I once got in a argument on whether or not i'd be okay with dating a pornstar because she gets fucked by other people and she was on the defense saying that its just a job. That was a red flag right there.
>This girl I mentioned was snapping like 4 different guys all within the time frame we were dating, ranging from talking about cuddling and sex.
>When I looked at her phone and called her out on it, she told me I should leave. As I was putting my shoes on and almost out the door, she walked into her bathroom and was apparently gonna swallow a handfull of pills, which looking back on it was a shitty attempt to try and make this about her.
>This was a half and half rant and informative reply
Whoops wrong thread

Well disregard all of that then.