Mfw I corner a Scandinavian on public transit and start small talking to him about my tulip garden and the weather

>mfw I corner a Scandinavian on public transit and start small talking to him about my tulip garden and the weather

How can we teach the euros to be friendly, Sup Forums? Are you doing your part?

>>mfw I corner a Scandinavian on public transit

dude, WTF
why would you ever do such a horrible thing?

What the fuck is wrong with you
Your mum must be so ashamed

I'm a bit... shall we say... devilish?

Godspeed fellow burger. We need to teach these Europoors to be friendly with each other in public

you probably traumatised your poor victim

there's a yearly cohort of norwegian exchange students to my uni's grad school and they were actually all very outgoing and friendly to talk to. maybe cause there in america

I remember some Swedish guy was visually trembling in a public bus. I sat right next to him, put my arm around his tiny shoulders and talked to him about the many different serial killers in America.

We don't trust strangers. You need to prove you're not a threat, at the very least.

What kind of a place is Scandinavia in which a man who owns a tulip garden still pings on the radar as a threat?

I fertilize my tulip garden with the blood of the innocent

Something similar happened to me.. I sat on the bus, and this guy sat down next to me and started rambling about cheap apartments. I just sat there quietly and hoped he would stop talking.
It was a nightmare.

>move to Scandinavian neighborhood
>grill burgers in my yard all day and chat you up BIGTIME when you're letting your dog out to piss

You think they will start sweating and stuttering but they will just tell you to fuck off and you will look weird as fuck

I know, that trick really lightens the mood

Aryans are friendly
T. Aryan

The fact that he enters his/her personal space. Scandinavians keep the longest distance when socializing, especially with strangers. The best way to approach a Scandinavian is to find any kind of interest they hold, and then maybe find a good segue to get to know them better.

I know for one that I expect literally everyone I don't know to be a mugger, so I have a very dismissive body language wherever I go in public in general. Never had anything happen to me, though.

>Scandinavian's are so retarded they can't make small talk

i have never spoken to an american....

i don't think i want to anymore anyway... can't believe i voted for this narcistic psychofat

I don't mind the conversation, it's just the ending. When and how do you stop?

k

Haha yes
>move to Norway
>trigger your neighbors by baking them pastries and waving to them as you mow your lawn

I would mow my lawn every day

Y-yeah. Huh. I guess the weather is nice.
*puts on headphones and stares out bus window for the rest of the ride*

Maybe we overthink social gestures.

I know that you in America say "how are you doing?" without legitimately asking how someone else is doing. I prefer when back in the day you just said "howdy" or something.

I would be confused if a newly arrived neighbour gave me pastry. I wouldn't know if it was just a nice gesture, plain and simple, or if you had other intentions with giving me them.

>be on vacation in London
>overhear woman speaking to her child in Swedish
>fellow American approaches Swede chick to ask about her nationality
>turns out he was born in Sweden and lived there until 20 years of age
>also turns out she lives near his hometown
>man turns away for a bit and Swede chick leaves without saying a word
>man grumbles to his wife about her rudeness, comments this is why he left the homeland

Don't really know where I'm going with this but I thought it was a cute interaction to witness

Scandis are so CUTE! I just want to be friends with them ALL!

that's horrible. don't ever do that again.

>come home from work
>fix my car in the driveway
>mow the lawn
>grill burgers in the yard
>lay in my hammock on the porch
>chat you the fuck UP
>get stoned
>bake you pastries
>do all of this every day
>mfw

why are euros so autistic?

(I wish I lived there though since I'm autistic)

>Scandi's face when I invite him over for yet another super bowl cookout

This is exactly why we don't like you yanks

>get up early in the morning to tell you good morning
>rush home in the afternoon to tell you good afternoon

How the fuck can you be so paranoid of someone mugging you when you are in fucking Norway? I´m also paranoid but that´s justifiable since i live in a shithole.

Last saturday i was in a car with some friends and 4 guys in 2 motorcycles looking very shady, started following us. We had to lose them since they were obviously waiting for a chance to stop us and assault us (i´ve seen that before). I was high so the experience was very terrifying.
I bet you don´t have to be afraid of something like that happening to you in Norway.

this, what could possibly happen to you in norway?

Haha hey Jón, why don't you stop on over and grab a burger? The game's on!

I'm from the American South so I'm used to nodding and smiling to every white person you walk past and them doing the same. It was weird when I went to university and they all stared at the ground and shit. Europeans seem to be a special brand of autist. I dislike making small talk with randoms, but at least say hello if you're sitting together so you aren't sitting on a train trying desperately to avoid interaction like weirdos.

Howdy sir. Mighty fine day t'day, dontcha think? I reckon it'll rain, so y'all betta getcha sun whilst y'all can.

>ywn have a Yank wingman that forces you to party

I'm from Texas and I once went up to New York to visit my at the time girlfriend. We were walking back to place I was staying in Queens and I waved hello to some random lady on the sidewalk watering her flowers. She gave this nervous smile and nodded her head.
Yankee girlfriend was immensely confused by this and asked if I knew her and when I said I didn't and that in Texas it's normal to wave hello to people you passed she told me it was weird and that you can look creepy doing it.
The fuck's the point in living in a giant community if you're afraid of everyone you walk past on the street?

For example if I'm on public transit and I sit down next to or across from somebody I'll be like "Hows it going?" or at the very least give them a respectful nod and a "hello"

Leave us alone REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Yeah when I go for a run in my neighborhood I wave to every car that passes and they do that two finger wave on the top of the steering wheel. Or if I see somebody drive by my house or walk by I'll wave. Just common courtesy in your community.

Why do you feel the need to say something?

>The fuck's the point in living in a giant community if you're afraid of everyone you walk past on the street?

There are no communities in Northern cities; the people just live like rats partitioned in their own little worlds.

This. And don't do it to me either, faggots.

>he doesnt want to live in a cargo container sized agenda 21 envirohouse©

Because its autistic not to. Most Americans try to strike up a conversation, I just say something so there isn't a weird silence and there is an acknowledgement.

No, not really, but I'm prepared to some degree. I thought Ecuador was supposed to be alright, but I guess not.

A friend of mine is a Brit, and he's been assaulted once, and had his bike stolen once in Oslo. We do have shitty people here too, and shit like that might happen when you trust strangers too much. I wish I didn't have to be like that, but some people spoil it for everyone wherever in the world you might be. I wish we in Norway could adopt some of that Eastern European pummeling of people who dare commit crime, but it's too rare here, and people will generally ignore instead.

Kek

>tfw you will never attempt to comfort a qt nervous Swede on public transit by talking to him about burgers

>assaulted
>only had his bike stolen
HAHHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHA

>He asks why there have been 5 superbowls this month
>You have just been playing previous dvr'd superbowl to have an excuse to cookout

>be in the US
>eating lunch at restaurant
>friend says he thinks he heard some other group speak swedish, and I should go and say hi to them

What the FUCK is wrong with Americans?

I bet that cheered him up

Scandi living in the US for a year now

>greeting EVERYONE, even if your eyes just meet momentarily
>cashiers asking me how my day is and if "I found everything alright"
>the automatic "excuse me/sorry" if you come within 3 feet of someone else at the grocery store
>"hey wassup/how you doing" when you pass people in a corridor
>mfw

I still haven't learned how to do the "I'm good, hows your day" smoothly enough.

>been alive in america 25 years
>still can't do the im good, hows your day smoothly enough

That sounds fucking turbo autistic and insecure, what the fuck is wrong with silence

maybe if y'all were allowed to own a firearm for protection, you'd be more at ease to converse with folks

i say howdy a lot, but i think that's only for Texas

my go to is "pretty good, how about you?"
50% of the time i get a "same", 50% of the time i get no response
like shit, why even ask if you aint gonna even respond. just say "hey" or something

well sure I'd be more sociable with my life on the line

no, i mean that you wouldn't need to be afraid of harm by just talking to a stranger

theres nothing going on in norway though the shit that happens there is childsplay also guns would probably make them act even more retarded

i suppose you can't fix assburgers

what if I doubt my quick draw

the whole point of living in the city to to be ignored.
i dated a girl from western north dakota in college and her whole home town of 3000 people found out she was dating a half asian from hawaii within about a week of us going out.
small town life is suffering, no privacy at all

watch Clint Eastwood movies, all of them besides Gran Torino (still a good movie though) give a +5 to Dex which levels up your quickdraw faster

think of them like some of those books in Skyrim

>be me
>get on the metro after a long day of work in the office
>going home to have a good rest
>11pm the metro is almost empty
>see a fat fuck wearing sandals and sock
>kek.com
>the train finally arrives
>get on the wagon
> the fat fuck approaches swiftly
>the smell of corn syrup and walmart shart punches my nostrils
>"howdy parner" he says
>stare away thinking its a vagonero asking for money
>"nice weathere here pal" the fat fuck says
>go to the end of the wagon to avoid the inevitable poo smell
>he corners me and with his burger breath he says
>"did you know i have a tulip garden? Aunt Myrna thought me a few gardening tricks"
>starts clapping
>pass out due to sugar overdose
>wake up in the last station with a $5 dollar note in my pocket

>american reading comprehension
depressing

>actively trying to have a conversation with a stranger on public transportation
Asshole. It's not a fucking bar or a college class with required partner work.