When's the last time you had sex?

When's the last time you had sex?

Never

Just over two years, before my ex dumped me for a total Chad

I learned to enjoy being single for a while but now I really want another girlfriend

Five months.
She was a 10, the only one I've ever had or ever have again.
Had been fucking her for almost three years.
Mfw: she realizes she's way too hot for me I guess.
Double mfw: at least I fucked her in the ass.

Couple hours ago. Got a terrible cramp in my leg cause I'm ridic out of shape and had to stop before cumming. Later leg was ok, so finished with her on top.

Sunday

I nutted after like 30 seconds. Embarrassed myself. But wtvr the ass was fat

Side not came in the condom and kept going to save face but now I'm worried I got her preg :( not worth

Don't remember let me ask my mom

>1999
>most confusing day of my life
>married for 6 years
>in that time lost my job
>found a new one
>come home first day of work
>wife sucks my dick and fucks like we're back in college
>I blow a load in her, then she keeps sucking till I cum again 2x
>best sex I'd ever had
>she never went full whore on me
>as I'm trying to regain composure, she starts talking about how hard it's been lately
>so happy I found new job, and am making money again
>then says things don't feel right anymore
>serves me divorce papers
>while I'm laid out on the couch barely able to move

>takes me to court and really fucks me
>gets our house
>both our everyday cars, and my MG project car
>cleans out our savings and half my retirement
>awarded 10 years alimony

Been a broke loser ever since, chicks don't want older men with money issues...

almost 8 months

>>Never. How many times have been offered? many. I am a chad waiting for one qtpi wife. so far, hasnt' happened.

Like, 6 hours ago. Hoorah for having sex daily because girlfriend

Infinity years ago

Nano thread
The greatest threat, or our only hope? As I laid in bed staring at electron micrographs of virus the thought occupied my mind, that perhaps virus are the only thing preserving carbon life in the universe.
It is possible that this universe is a simulation by a higher form of life that is attempting to exterminate carbon life from it's own universe.
>We need immortality
>We need to colonize mars
>We need to terraform earth
>We need to mitigate seismic instability
>We need better nuclear facilities
>We need better grand designers
>We need better air quality control
>We need better understanding of our drugs
>We need better surveillance
5 getting on 6

2011.

>meet girl at work
>shes losing weight and an ok body, fuckable but not anything to write home about
>go see a movie
>come back to her parents and chill
>she places her head on my lap
>she feels my dick get hard and teases it with her mouth
>i adjust and just take it out. she starts sucking real good.
>i have her jeans and panties pulled down with her ass sticking out.
>i start to hump her and rub my dick between her cheeks, by then shes backing her ass up
>i try to get it in handsfree
>she just grabs my dick and swirls the head of my penis against her the rim of her pussy hole
>i push in and pump
>she backs her ass in
>pump for a minute and she takes my dick and puts in it her ass
>pump a few more times and she asks me to cum inside
>my dick is pumping cum in her while shes grinding her ass against me. im cupping her tits and making out with her at the same time.
>i take my dick out and she sucks me off. kiss her some more and my dick gets hard again
>i fuck her prone bone and cum inside her pussy five minutes later.
>parents come home and we move into her room downstairs
>we fuck till like 5am.
>i leave and by next week shes already on some other dude at work. i still got to fuck her a few more times when he wasnt around.
>im pretty sure he knew too because he gave me a few smirks casually talking about her
>almost wanted to say "sup man, can i get her Wednesday and you can trade off on Saturday? Shit how does Tuesday sound?"

12 hours ago - spanked her ass until she made a big slut puddle then banged her dizzy

2 Months ago, now I use a fleshlight

Doesnt matter, I can triforce

áÿ
ÿ

Never

I misread that as "she was 10" at first

October 11, 2015. Best sex I've ever had that became the last sex I've ever had.

few days ago

gf is at her mom's and will be back tomorrow, then sex again

About a week ago. Was aight

Last Thursday, miss my boyfriend

About 4 years ago, after all these years I don't really have the urge to fuck anymore, I have an army of sex toys to keep me happy while I'm enjoying all the free time I have

Faggot

Never sadly

Takes one to know one

2 hours ago.

23 hours ago

Pic related

yesterday afternoon.

fucking hell dude that shit got me in the feels man i feel for you my dude.

God damn Sup Forumsro. It's stupid how much shit women get out of a divorce. I feel for ya my amigo, I hope shit gets better for you.

What kind of MG user?

nice std's

When I dropped out of school.

over 2 years ago
I dream about it pretty often and wake up feeling like shit

Oh man that sucks, usually I just dream about my best friend who killed himself... I'll reconsider my priorities for sure.

Oh man that would've been dope lol

Why delete? I don't give a shit.

Me too

uh, that's a dumb idea dude. the vast majority of people these days won't bring a relationship to the point of marriage unless there's sex.

go to some extremist christian cult or something if that's how you roll

last night, girlfriend and I 69'd before we fucked

January 17th
>Was a Long Dark Night
>user just messaged his love and asked to come over
>She said yes, Expecting not much he brought his PCMR Computer
>Little user did not know what he got himself into
>3 Hours into him being over she wanted his hard but somewhat a bit over average penis (7inches to be somewhat exact)
>The Sup Forumstard thought he was in.
>He gave up after 10 thrusts of his pelvic bone and he never came
>2 Weeks later she never talked to him again
That is the last time this tard has ever had sex

5th 4. 2016... so long time.. i wish i had never found out how good it is.... i really want to but i am fucking unsozialisable. outside from work i dont know how i interact with people

i wanna know when will be the first time i have sex

I know how you fell bro

I have a girlfriend, and I'm lucky if I get it once a month

I felt the same thing tbh, And I wish I never loszt my virginity to be honest. Welp

>be me
>horny on a Saturday night
>browse backpage
>milf hooker
>65 bucks
>tots worth it
>pic related

Tomorrow for the first time

she's cheating on you. trust me.

Hier soir.
Elle avait ses règles. Donc pas des masses envie de la prendre. Donc petite fellation au début et ça s'est terminé en mouthfucking, avec ejac buccale.
Simple mais efficace.