I need to talk about some feels and I have no one else to turn to b

Alexander Brooks
Alexander Brooks

I need to talk about some feels and I have no one else to turn to b

b me 8th grade
become best friends with this girl
we are inseparable all through highschool
talked on the phone for hours every night or hung out every night
we both dated other people but later years in hs we started fucking pretty regularly
we both knew that we were in love but neither one of us were ready for a committed relationship

senior year we started drifting apart a little bit not talking as much not hanging out as much
we both dropped out of school and finished with geds
would still see each other on the beach and at parties
still fucked from time to time but whenever one of us would mention a relationship it would scare the other away
at one point my heart couldn't take it any more and I cut off contact with her
we both went to college in different places and we would drunk dial each other from time to time
one time I was having a really hard time and decided fuck it I'm going to go see her bc she was always able to help

drive 6 hours and show up at her apt at 3 am

she lets me in and we stay up talking on her bed the rest of the night and then made passionate love
she skipped her classes and we slept most of the morning and then hung out for the rest of the day.
I stayed there for two days and we both just had the best time and everything just felt right
before I left we talked a little about a relationship but decided the distance was too much and we both needed our own lives
we always had the assumption that fate would bring us back together

Cont

Lucas Morales
Lucas Morales

after I went back to school I pretty much cut off all contact with her
it was just too painful knowing that we both loved one another and couldn't be together
that was almost 20 years ago
I have a wife and son now who I both love with all my heart
I only saw her once between then and now, we ran into each other somewhere and I recognized her voice as she said my name from behind
I just gave her a hug said it was nice to see her and moved on
sat in my car for 30min or so in the parking lot before my legs stopped shaking enough for me to drive
we recently reconnected through social media
we started talking about the old days
And feeling nostalgic
she messaged me yesterday that after the day I came to visit she would lay in bed at night wishing I would show up and we would figure it out
said that she thought about calling me all the time but I hadn't answered her calls or returned her messages in so long that she felt it was pointless
said that I was the only person she ever loved and had ever loved her back
said she wants me back in her life

Fuck man I'm so screwed up in the head right now. I've loved this girl all of my life, but I love my wife and son too much to leave them. I really don't know what to do. I'm not going to leave my wife but I would love to start my friendship over again with this girl but I know that it's not a good idea.

I can't talk to my wife or my friends about it. Please help me out Sup Forums

Tyler Nelson
Tyler Nelson

Bump

Ethan Gonzalez
Ethan Gonzalez

Well bro, you have to face facts. You're in an ACTUAL ESTABLISHED relationship, currently, as of today, this very moment. Considering it never took off with the other chick, even though it felt "so meant to be", then fam, I have some news for you; it wasn't meant to be with the other chick. You feel a strong connection, as a result of having grown up with near proximity, but that's all it is. Count your blessings. Count them well. You have a loving wife. A son. A family! Don't do something irrational, immature, rash, over some girl who doesn't have the same levels of commitment that your wife was willing to give you. Don't forget, the 80:20 rule.

Cameron Brooks
Cameron Brooks

Seems like quite the situation man. You first have to figure out who you love more: your wife or her ? It must be hard. One thing though: do not cheat. If you decide that you love her more tell your wife and get a peaceful divorce. Be there for your son tho. Do not abbandon him. Poor lad will have hard time in all this. I say choose the one you love...

Tyler Ward
Tyler Ward

Hi I'm new to Sup Forums and I've really wanted to come here. How the fuck do I get out?!

Christian Ward
Christian Ward

You must be young if you still think it's about love. This isn't a movie where everything will work out if he's honest about love. This is real life, where so many problems will arise as a result of leaving his family for someone else. Is it worth it? Probably not. It'll cost tens of thousands of dollars to do all of that, and then not to mention his son will be upset, and more importantly, it'll be one of the most selfish decisions to do.

Evan Gutierrez
Evan Gutierrez

As i see your point, i dont think he should stay in a relationship with someone he doesnt love. But then it may be just midlife crisis. So yes, i agree and disagree with you. Poor guy must have a hard time rn

Alexander Howard
Alexander Howard

All I will say is that the grass is not greener on the other side. You have a life now. She is part of your past. You are treading dangerously close to a whole can of worms by talking to her at all.

Ask yourself this. If you wife read the conversation you had with her... how would she feel, and how would that turn out? That is your guide in this situation

William Kelly
William Kelly

Didn't work the first time.
Didn't work the second time.
Not gonna work if you try again - is only going to make the inevitable crash harder for both of you if you try to make a relationship out of it. Perhaps worst of all, it would devastate your son, and probably your wife, too.
You'll ALWAYS be tormented by the nagging thoughts of "what if I made different choices in the past?", but trust me user, acting on that curiosity in the present and not leaving it alone is going to destroy everything you value - including whatever positive elements you have with your current dynamic with her.

Nicholas Long
Nicholas Long

He says it in his post that he loves his wife. He says it twice.

David Allen
David Allen

Be the man you promised your wife you would be when you got married.

Josiah Kelly
Josiah Kelly

Upset? My father left my mom when I was 12. I was forced to spend weekends with him until I was 17 when I simply refused, let all my feelings out, and then never spoke to him again. I didnt even go to his funeral. The last time my father ever heard my voice was me telling him "I fucking hate you". I hope that was what he was thinking about right before he died alone in the hospital

Christopher Bell
Christopher Bell

I see. Now that i give it a sevo d thought you are right. This wont work. Probably just midlife crisis. So disregard my last advice. Stay with your family. Sorry for not thinking through enough

Logan Taylor
Logan Taylor

Op here
I know for sure that I'm not going to leave my wife. Like other anons said she has always been the one that's by my side. I just don't know how to deal with these feelings and there is no one in my life I can really talk to about it. The last couple of days have just brought up so many old emotions

Asher Cook
Asher Cook

You sound like a spoiled fucking cunt. Life is not as simple as a twelve year old sees it. Ever think about hearing his side of the story? I'd bet millions there are things you don't know. Too late now though, you whiny bitch.

Aaron Phillips
Aaron Phillips

Be grateful that you have the memories and use them to proceed into the future.

Or you know, stop being a little bitch and get the fuck over it.

Aiden King
Aiden King

I had pretty much forgotten about her and now my chest feels like it did twenty years ago. I would love for this girl to be part of my life again but I feel the same way I did back then. That it's not healthy but it hurts so bad when I cut her off, I feel like I'm killing something that is a part of me

Evan Wright
Evan Wright

Yeah, listen to yourself - you're gonna fuck her.

Just make sure she is cool with just being the side piece and won't blow your shit up.

Isaac Hughes
Isaac Hughes

I just don't know how to deal with these feelings and there is no one in my life I can really talk to about it

There is a reason for that. Your wife would not be happy you even talked to her would she? You certainly cant tell your wife that you still have feeling for a chick you havent talked to in 20 years, that you also just started talking to, and that you have "problems" dealing with these emotions.

Beyond that you also need to examine why you ever considered talking to the old girl again. What is wrong with your wife and relationship you would even think for a second, about a girl you knew a long long time ago in a galaxy far far away. That should be fixed before anything else

Parker Cox
Parker Cox

Yea I knew his side of the story. He liked to do coke and fuck a bartender that worked near our house. When my mom found out, he decided he liked bartender pussy more than living with his wife and son. He was human trash. Go fuck yourself

Josiah Nguyen
Josiah Nguyen

You want to be with someone who's willing to fuck up your entire life because SHE wants it?

You think someone as selfish as that is really capable of real, mature love?

You think it's worth throwing away everything for someone who only loves you as a last resort?

Jack Edwards
Jack Edwards

She just messaged me out of the blue a couple of days ago. It started off super simple. She was asking if I remembered someone's name. Then we started reminiscing about all the people we grew up with. We didn't talk about us at all. Then she dropped that bombshell on me last night

Owen Jenkins
Owen Jenkins

You can't. It's too late now.

Jaxson Wilson
Jaxson Wilson

Listen to yourself - can you blame him? I can't imagine how annoying a 12 year old you must have been. You should spend a little less time blaming him and a little more looking in the mirror. Cunt.

Robert Rogers
Robert Rogers

Juggle both women until it blows up in your face

Evan Jones
Evan Jones

And if you were the model of a happy husband, you would have clicked ignore on that first message, and certainly wouldnt have had second conversation

Isaiah Bennett
Isaiah Bennett

Maybe your mom wasn't giving him what he needed so he found it elsewhere. Should blame your mom really. If she kept him happy he never would have had to do coke or fuck a bartender. Then to top it off he had a shitty kid like you, no wonder he left.

Oliver Mitchell
Oliver Mitchell

Hey user I have a serious answer for you.

Ask youself : Do I love this woman so dearly to change my life compleatly and possibly destroy a life of wife and son or
Do you love the IDEA of loving the girl from past?

You have been a kind of idealization, imaginary best person in the world and the romantic love that doesnt exist for so many years you probably lost any kind of actual context.

I think I really fucking do think that the girl u loved back then is SOMEONE COMPLEATLY ELSE than the woman that reconnected with you. She probably made some mistakes in her life leading her to wanting WHAT WAS BACK THEN. Because she didnt make it without you.

Now think about your wife. You have been with her during her every single fucking fuck up in life but she didnt EVER let go. Never gave up and always protected the realationship you have now.

Do you want to risk it all for a woman that makes u feel like insecure stupid boy form the past
Or do you want a woman that was able to build a beautiful relationship with you?

Owen Thomas
Owen Thomas

OP, are you happy with your life with your current family. If so, then you need to just fucking ignore this woman.

Parker Hall
Parker Hall

Truth

Luke Perez
Luke Perez

Right yea, its the wife and kids fault someone cant keep their dick in their pants, the drugs out of their nose, or a steady job. I feel soooo bad for him. Poor poor him.

Caleb Diaz
Caleb Diaz

Awwww I feel so bad for the wife he left. Poor her. Awww I feel bad for the son he left. Poor her.

Liam Green
Liam Green

Or you know. Keep your dick in your pants. If you are going to have that little self control do the world a favor and stay single.

Zachary Rogers
Zachary Rogers

Thats all you can come back with? Or did you just realize that its a lot harder to defend degenerate trash than you thought?

Bentley Wright
Bentley Wright

Damn user thank you!

Noah Murphy
Noah Murphy

you should really stop replying to these virgin neckbeard trolls. They're attention-starved and just want some interaction with another human being.

Austin Moore
Austin Moore

Unlike you, this man was able to get into a steady relationship. He couldnt hold on to it and maybe shouldnt have gotten into if he knew he would wind up doing that. If you want a family you have to be able to deal with them.

Cooper Torres
Cooper Torres

If the wife is not keeping her husband happy, he will find someone who will. This is pretty common. I'm surprised that you don't understand this, but will blame it on getting brainwashed by your mom over the years. I would say it's the leading cause of divorce and drug/alcohol abuse.

Adam Anderson
Adam Anderson

Keep your dick in your pants.
Not a possibility if you have a decent sex drive. If a woman wanted me to keep my dick in my pants, I would find another that would want me to take it out.

Adam Anderson
Adam Anderson

If the wife is not keeping her husband happy, he will find someone who will.

And that is where your logic fails. That is exactly what a degenerate piece of shit would do. If you are not a degenerate piece of shit you jerk off in the shower like every other married man on this planet.

Marriage is an oath to god. If you arent going to love and honor your spouse for life, dont get fucking married

Gabriel Turner
Gabriel Turner

Unlike you, this man was able to get into a steady relationship
Someone is reflecting on others.

Mason Brooks
Mason Brooks

While i dont agree with the god shit thats true

Jaxson Edwards
Jaxson Edwards

Yes I'm very happy with them.
I don't think this other girl is trying to start a relationship, she told me how happy she was for me that I'm happily married, and I don't think she's trying to destroy that. I think she just wants me to be a part of her life again bc she misses having someone who truly cares about her.

I think that we could have a platonic relationship but I've never been able to handle that emotionally with her so I've always just blocked her out of my life.

Zachary Sullivan
Zachary Sullivan

The logic is sound, the wife is a degenerate for not keeping her man satisfied. It's in the bible that a woman needs to satisfy her man, if you really want to bring God into it, she failed.

Henry Jenkins
Henry Jenkins

I got cucked by tyrone, fuckers even if my dick are 7 inches..

Adrian Brown
Adrian Brown

Really. I must have missed that part in CCD. Where can I find that passage?

Hudson Parker
Hudson Parker

It's a two way road user, she took an oath to got to serve her husband when she married him, she broke the oath first. With the oath broken the husband is free to roam.

John Robinson
John Robinson

Are you fucking dense? Ephesians 5:22-24 or Colossians 3:18 for starters, but it is actually in many places in the bible. Don't talk about God unless you actually know something about the subject faggot.

Anthony Edwards
Anthony Edwards

The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband. For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

1 Corinthians 7:4

Charles Harris
Charles Harris

samefaging from

A lot of anons here tell u you should think about yourself becasue they actually never have anyone else they would care about.

You and get this.

You can actually go and seek for actual help. Go see a therapist once, maybe two times. just to make sure you are at peace with yourself.
Then and only then start thinking about everything else.

Take this moment in your life and use it to reevaluate that u value the most in life.

I think you will be smart enough to stick witch what you have
I also think that when u'll finally get over this emotional rollercoaster you will love your wife much stronger than u did before.

After you actually reclaim your emotional stability buy your son a trip, let him go to friends for a weekend and fuck your wife like you didnt fuck her in years.

Fucking do it. I want to be somewhere in a week or month time from now and I want to remember this thread and smile upon my glass of whiskey and think " my dear user, I hope u made your dear precious wife cum today"

Bentley Morris
Bentley Morris

1 Corinthians 7:3-5
The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband. For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

Like I said, she failed as a wife by depriving him and the husband was tempted by another.

Nolan Robinson
Nolan Robinson

Op here good advice user

Liam Russell
Liam Russell

I think the part that's fucking me up the most is that I made the wrong decision all those years ago but there is no way to fix it, I'm in too deep in my life now.

Even knowing that I'm not going to let this destroy my marriage, it still hurts

Carter Roberts
Carter Roberts

lmao the first post is surprisingly good advice from b

Austin Gomez
Austin Gomez

hurts? Man the fuck up.

Ryder Sanders
Ryder Sanders

but you actually drove there. You had this last passionate sex and you both decided that you don't want to risk it all.

You are to harsh to yourself. YOU DROVE TEHRE. She could stop you, she could have you. But she decided not to.

You did everything you were supposed to do.

Liam Young
Liam Young

I'm going to say this as an user who always tries to get OP's to do the right thing, always tries to dissuade people from suicide and self harm, always abides by the law, is always unrealistically polite at restaurants, always picks Lawful Good in D&D and always plays Paragon in Mass Effect.
I genuinely think the right decision here is to say goodbye to your family and go be with this girl.

Connor Nelson
Connor Nelson

Something similar happened to me about 4 years ago. I don't have kids though. Married a great woman that keeps my balls empty and my stomach full. Fun to be around, generally a good girl. Couldn't be luckier with landing my wife.

Then I ran into an old flame. Like you guys we were inseparable for years, fucked on a regular, and then some how drifted apart. Then Facebook happened. She tracked me down and we started talking via messenger. First just some "hi how are ya" that escalated to "I miss you and I've always loved you" type of shit. No doubt I still had feelings for her.

Rather than cheating on my wife and ruining the good shit we built I sat my wife down and explained what was going on. Naturally she was fucking furious but eventually she came around to the fact that its possible for me to love 2 women. I got them together and they both basically agreed they were in love with me and I was in love with both of them. Now I'm pretty much fucking both of them. No lesbian or 3some shit but I take them both out separately and I fuck them both separately. I have a wife (my bottom bitch) and a girlfriend. It's working so far. Next on my list is trying to get all 3 of us to live under the same roof but I still think there is some catty competitiveness between them even though both of their positions are secure.

Ethan Rodriguez
Ethan Rodriguez

are u fucking mad? I am almost positive either that didn't happend at all and u watched too much love stories with Scarlet and Penelope

or

this happend and the woman fucking hate eachother and you and u will end up alone

Jose Thompson
Jose Thompson

You're feelings are from the past as it was left unresolved.
You're feeling what was left from way back when.
Sadly, as someone who has seen this play out, it doesn't work. You're both not the same people anymore, no where close.
My mother was in a relationship with a man for 10+ years. An old fling of his, from when he was around 25 years old, he is now is his 60s, contacted him basically saying how she missed him all these years and regretted that they never had a relationship other then sexual.
My mother has nursed this man back to health many times, has been loyal and faithful and has loved and cared for him dearly over the course of their relationship. He loved and cared for my mom too, but tended to be more of a selfish person and made things about him most of the time.
Anyways, he wrote the woman back and said he was currently in a loving and happy relationship and it would be innapropriate to have any contact with her. But, as you're feeling now, the old memories and good times and the feelings from way back when flooded back and he felt he was in love with this woman.
I should mention their fling was off and on like yours for several years as she lived in Canada and he lived in California, but his band frequently toured Canada and she would go to all of his shows and they'd hook up while in town, but a long distance thing wasn't what they wanted.
He eventually decided to ignore his initial email to her, and his feelings for my mother, and start talking to this woman. My mother played no role in the email nor did she care. He came to my mom when he received the email and told her about it and showed her his response. She didn't care and was thankful that he respected their relationship and she went about life. Months passed and my mom never thought about her or that email again. Then one day, while she was working, she still had 3 hours left to her shift, he came to visit my mom. He was acting strangely and my mom asked if he was okay.
Continued.

Dominic Young
Dominic Young

Thanks user

Henry Thompson
Henry Thompson

I may be partially insane but its working now. Maybe I'll end up alone, maybe not, but I'm going to see how this plays out.

Hunter Rodriguez
Hunter Rodriguez

TBH I don't think that she wants anything more than a platonic relationship. She told me how happy she was that I was happily married and I don't think that she would want to destroy that. My problem has always been that it hurts too much to have a platonic relationship so I've always just cut her out of my life completely. I'm probably going to do it again but it's always hard on me emotionally.

Ps I'm usually not a whiny bitch!!!!

Samuel Hill
Samuel Hill

To which he responded that he was not okay because he has fallen back in love with the other women and he was leaving her. My mom was shocked, devastated, hurt, insecure and destroyed. She has trusted him. Given him everything. They had retirement plans and a life planned out until they died.
My mother screamed and told him to gtfo. He left.
Later, after work (I can only imagine how hard it must have been for my mom to finish out the next 3 hours of her shift with all that shit going on) they spoke on the phone about all of it. I'd hear crying, anger, misery, and terror from my mother as they spoke. She felt betrayed and very insecure. Like, what does this woman have that I don't? What can she give you that I haven't? It wasn't about that nor was it about my mom at all, although it took over a year after their breakup for her to finally see that. It was about his needs. His selfish fucked up needs to rekindle this past relationship with this woman because he was feeling nostalgic and missing being young and in the past during a fun and more carefree time in his life.
As weeks passed he would still contact my mom. They'd fight and she would ignore him for a few days or a week until they'd speak again. Ironically he had no one else in his life and the few people he did have all stopped talking to him when they learned of what he had done to my mother.
When he would call, he would feel the need to bitch about his issues with the new woman and ask for advice. Uultimately all he could talk about was how excited he was to go visit her after all these years in Canada. My mom basically said, get on that plane and we are done forever. There is no going back. He got on the plane.
1 day into his week long trip my mom gets a call from him. He is already back in California. What happened?
He gets there and this woman unloads her entire life onto him. From her horrible childhood to bad times as a young adult to how..
Continued.

Samuel Stewart
Samuel Stewart

For a moment I was jelly tho.
I cant imagine how amaizing it is to have twice as much ass and be able to swtich em.
U like damn muslim that got 2 wives and everyone just lives like this.
But dont u feel like the woman you are with aren't equal to you?
Would you let them fuck other man provided they had feeling for them?

Owen Rodriguez
Owen Rodriguez

To how she is now addicted to meth, her government funding is being cut off, she can't afford to live and will be homeless in the coming month, and how she decided to make a list of all the men in her life, then goes and gets the list and shows it to him, and she decided to contact every man on that list to see who she could reel into a relationship to take care of her and her addiction. The best part, he was the last person on the list of about 40 men! Every man before her told her to fuck off, but he was the idiot that fell for it. He was so creeped out and disgusted that when she got into the shower, she grabbed his shit and left and came back.
He is telling my mom this on the phone and she is laughing at him. He wants my mom back. She tells him to fuck off.
In the next 2 weeks he begs and pleads for my mother's forgiveness and to take him back. She refuses, thank God.
My mom happened to have a chance at a fresh start and was only staying behind for him. She took the fresh start and moved hours away.
Once he realized he couldn't get my mom back he calls the other woman, begs for her forgiveness and she takes him back with the agreement that they marry in the next week so she can get an American green card and he moves her in with him and takes care of her. He agrees! Because he doesn't know how to be alone.
My mother is doing wonderfully and could care less about him. Him and her have tried to fuck with my mom and contact her but she blocked them and changed her number.
It's been a few years and my moms ex and the Canadian methhead have officially called it quits. Go figure.
My point to my insanely long story if you haven't already figured it out is that you're feeling the past emotions for her. I'm not saying she is going to be as bad as this woman is, but you don't know her true situation until you involve yourself with her and by then it will be too late. Your wife has given herself to you. Dedicated herself to you. Don't throw that away!

Caleb Collins
Caleb Collins

Op here
Thanks for all of the advice anons
I needed to hear it but didn't have anyone to talk to about it.

Thanks for always being there Sup Forums

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