I give up. Life sucks

I give up. Life sucks.

I am completely empty. Meds don't help. Therapy is a joke and never has helped me. (I've seen multiple fucking therapist) I have no meaning in life. Everyday is just a repetitive task. I can't build relationships and have lost all feelings. (Probably due to my meds) All I feel now is like I'm just spectator of life. I'm literally dead inside.

I've thought about suicide. But my life isn't all that bad. I have a loving mother and little sister who care about me very much. Even knowing im slowly loosing love back to them, I still feel connected in a way. I realize suicide isn't a victimless crime and I've come to learn that feelings is all that really matters in life. Everything you do or have done in life is because feeling motivate you to do said things. But i've lost my feelings. MY mom and my sister can still feel, however I don't want to hurt their feelings. My suicide would tear them apart. I can't do that.


I give up. I'm just gunna do drugs and fast forward my life until my mom dies. Depending and the relationship I have w/ my sister then, I'll probably kms.

I give up. All I care about is drugs now. I don't even do a lot of drugs, but now i'm just gunna see how far down this rabbit hole goes.


Bye guys.

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You spelt "losing" wrong faggot.

lmao oops

if you're gonna an hero at least stream it

also nice got

*yawn*

Therapy, i've heard this word before. Is therapy used to cure something that goes wrong with the mind?

Get you an oz of shrooms and take a quater oz at a time and you will find yourself user, this is 100 bro no bs. I was a needle junkie done a quater of shrooms and not only got clean but fixed my whole life

idk how I would an hero.

I was thinking just taking a bunch of sleeping meds and put a bag over my head. Seems like a peaceful way to go.

Or I might go out in a blaze of glory and just take every drug I can get at once.

Or I might just keep it simple and jump off a building.

Shrooms and other psychedelics always make me feel amazing after taking them for a while.

It makes me believe that depression is stupid and a waste of time for a while, but then that feeling goes away and I get depressed again.

Maybe ill try meditating idk

*yawns as well*

Hey, I'm going through a rough part in life also but I've been trying this thing and it's been helping. How about trying to live in the moment and not to really overthink, appreciate the fact that you can just relax and do nothing or that you're a busy person and have stuff to do, just the simple things you do on a day to day is what matters. How about building some friendships before thinking about relationships? Talk to random people you may encounter on your usual routine and you might actually find everything to become quite more interesting. Trust me. You don't have to make an impact on the world for your life to matter, just choose atleast one person and make an impact on their lives, and you will see how much your life is actually valuable. Try doing new things and switching it up once in a while. Don't waste your life doing drugs man, you've said that you realized suicide isn't a victimless crime, but do you realize that drugs will basically make you throw your life away and in a sense you're comitting suicide.... Bro, sometimes it can feel like you hit rock bottom but that's when you have to reach out, sometimes you may not be able to do it on your own, form bonds with people, get emotionally closer with your family. Don't give up man! I really wish to talk to you outside of Sup Forums and if you would like we can exchange info and find a means of communication. But for now bro, take care please.

Go to bed.

become a firefighte and be the fag who runs into the building to safe the last missing person. live and wind or die and win. Or donate your organs to ppl.

have you ever tried acid op

If you truly give up, then you have nothing to live for and therefore nothing to lose. If that is truly the case, then answer these questions for me, and I will guide you:
What do you care about most?
What are you most passionate about? (this could be a topic or an opinion)
What brings you joy?

Hey Op, i feel your pain man.

I know you haven't pulled the plug on your self yet do to the fact of knowing that you can do something, but having the motivation is difficult to do so. Just hold out man , go to group session if you can and meet other people in the same boat as you. It will help a lot by making new friends and just being out of the house and doing something new, you will feel better man. For the drug stuff i have to say that i still pick up a ball of blow every month which i guess you can call my medication if you like, but there is always a change in our lives dude it may not happen overnight but the good things in life come slowly to us.

Not op, but you have gotten yourself out of this situation before?.

Agreed

op here

>How about building some friendships before thinking about relationships?

When I said "relationships" I meant like having a basic connection with anyone.

I've tried being social. I hate it. Every relationship I've ever had with another human always ends and most of the time, it's cuz they hate me now.

>Don't waste your life doing drugs man

When I don't have drugs, I just isolate myself. I have way to much anxiety to even leave the house cuz I'm afraid someone will just fucking look at me. I don't understand why I'm like this. I used to be really social and people liked me in school. But when sophomore year came, my mental status completely changed. Now I'm like this. I hated going to school. I pretty much dropped out and went to a school that only has you come in once a week so that way I didn't have to leave the house that much.

Once I discovered drugs, especially drugs that suppress anxiety like benzos, I realized exactly how bad my anxiety is.

I'd rather just live my life high on drugs all the time, cuz when I don't, I become extremely A-social. I feel like I would be wasting my life if I DIDN'T do drugs.


I appreciate the advice, and I've reached the point of living in the moment and trying not to overthink, but everything is just shitty, even in the moment.

Yeah, it's great, but Im on 40mg prozac and I believe it suppresses the effects of lsd.

It was cool, the two times I did it, but it wasn't like absolutely mind blowing or life changing.

I just like looking at the pretty hallucinations. c:

>What do you care about most?
Mom and sister
>What are you most passionate about? (this could be a topic or an opinion)
Art.
>What brings you joy?
Nothing.

op, please just watch this 8 minute lecture. 8 minutes will not hurt you. i beg you to watch it. dunno if it will help, but it helped me. youtube.com/watch?v=f_HkQ4-x4P4

Short answer:yes

Well in previous occasions when I've been having a hard time I just didn't really give it much thought and I just kept myself busy and the thoughts would just fade away, I guess my brain just needed some extra stimulation and apart from that I got a girlfriend and she and I were depressed together and then we both surpassed that stage, I guess she has really helped me, that's why I would recommend talking to people

I guess you can say it.

From my experience, all it was, was educating exactly what was wrong with me, which can be useful, but I've never gotten to the point of actually curing what is wrong with me. I've had a lot of therapist. Especially growing up. I've had one that actually stopped seeing me but she couldn't handle me. I was in elementary school when this happened.

Therapy CAN be useful, but it's either too expensive or just bad therapy that will waste ur time.

Man i have ruined so many friendship with people when it could've been something greater if i wasn't so egoistic with myself and making myself such a loner.... i hate myself for using still to this day... but its the only way i can cope with myself.

becoming a drug addict is going to tear them apart too

Op, that's the thing about relationships, only the best ones will work out, and those are the ones that are worth keeping, why are you gonna give up after a few hundred tries if you can find that person who is worth more than a million people?

About your drugs, if they help you be a little more social why not try interacting socially when taking drugs and try to cut down on them little by little until you need no drugs to be a complete socialite?

Bro, have you tried apologizing and changing your 'egoistic' ways little by little?
Don't give up on something you believe can go on to be better. Keep on pushin bro. I know you will one day be happy with someone you love

if i were to change, i don't think i would be as funny and calling stuff out for what it is or how i see it, i kinda let things roll of my tounge ...someone who speaks without a filter at times is the best way to describe myself when meeting new people or being with friends. and using coke helps boost my confidence as well, which is the reason i think i find it so hard to let that go. I have antidepressants but stopped taking them and started using blow again...i don,t try or bother trying to get into contact with the people who i became incontact with even..... i just walk away from them....i don't know if it is because i am better them them or afraid to be friends with them... i'm so fucked man...

>Get your hands on some decent opiates OP, like oxys
>Shotgun your brains out while doped the fuck out cobain style when you can't stand it any longer

Fuck all your emotional faggots.

Life is fucked for some people, only dumb niggers truly beleive that suicide is 'wrong' in every instance. Sometimes it is a perfectly rational thing to do, sometimes your life is just fucked.

i would still put a bullet in your chest, if i knew i was going o truly end my life.

Lol same fam. The only thing that's keeping me alive is my mom and one friend

Bro, believe me when I say this, I'm the same frigging way, I speak with no filter and make dumb jokes all the time, even dad jokes at times and piss off everyone... haha. But what i'm getting at is if the people around you don't like you for the way you are, if you enjoy being who you are, then, fuck them! It's your life to live, not theirs, just be yourself and stick with the people that haven't left your side. Man, don't be afraid of forming new bonds, go in to the matter with an open mind and some excitedness for this new adventure. As i told op, why not try cutting down on the drug intake little by little?

Fuck you postin this for? Sup Forums aint no comfort corner

...

...

Nothing brings you joy, so drugs are pointless, they are just an excuse for self-destruction and apathy.
You care about your mom and sister, I suspected this from your fast-forward comment and a lack of mention of suicide. I understand this thoroughly, for I'm in the same position. I survive for family, I refuse to inflict the pain and grief my suicide would cause them. However I have also realised over the years that coasting life and killing time isn't much better - these people, particularly your mom, cares and worries about you more deeply than you could know. To make her suffer by watching your life pass you by is almost as bad as suicide. She will not mind if you fail, because she loves you, so long as you try.
You are passionate about art, so imagine this - your most beloved piece of art, whatever it may be - falling into disrepair through neglect because no-one will look after it, it just ages and crumbles while you watch helplessly. Perhaps not as bad as it being destroyed, but.... I'm sure you get my point. (Cont)

I don't know you, but you are loved. I love you. Don't give up.

I've tried killing myself via drug/alcohol OD six times, and woke up fine every single time. It's really a horrible experience to live through, considering you're already down enough to try to end it, then waking up not even being able to properly fucking kill yourself.

Honestly I appreciate life much more now. Get off your shitty meds, and find something you love to do. It'll help, a lot.

I still find life bland and pointless sometimes, but those moments where I'm doing something I truly enjoy just make it worth it. I'm going to be an uncle soon too, so that also keeps me going.

I also indulge in copious amounts of alcohol and bud, and often other drugs, which also somewhat helps that shitty feeling I have all the time. Tbh I have no real reason to be down or depressed other than the fact that I'm basically a loser or maybe some underlying psychological issues or some shit. I have a few close friends and a lot of other friends, but I'm 24 living at home and literally going nowhere other than down which is a pretty shit feeling.

TL;DR keep your head up and just try to push through.

i wish i could stop, when i stop using before i went on a real downhill spiral, suicide was looking like a real option. WHen i am ready to quit again i will take it at a more gradual paste. I sometimes feel like getting into contact with the people who i became friends with and had flings with... did you ever contact any of the old people you use to know?

Maybe you're that person which may help the humanity one day but you're kicking away that thing because you're too busy with drugs and depression. Think about all the things you could do as a human, you're not a dog or an insect. I wish you alls the good and I hope you'll find your way back to good.

Gay. You don't know him, and if it was me, being patronised by an idiot like you would just make me feel worse. Kys.

Just know that if you kill yourself, you'll never be depressed again.

i would just keep on buying blow.... You are not that clever at making a argument are yea, with the fact at hand? lol.

You are enough, there's always a reason for something, and your problems have their causes too. Take it step by step, begin by affirming to yourself your value and making a schedule. Every day, as often as you can, practice something that makes you happy, as well as chores and maintenance, for the capacity to improve an aspect of your life. That's essentially it. You can do it kiddo.

For their sake, you must at least try, and if you're truly at the point of giving up then you have nothing to lose, which is a huge asset. On top of that, you're fortunate enough to have a passion - art. This puts you in a great position, you can try anything in the world of art with nothing to lose. Learn techniques, hone your craft, make art and share it with the world, and more importantly your family. You have nothing to be afraid of anymore, you are free to do anything because you have nothing to fear.
In a nutshell, rather than waste your life by simply killing time, you might as well use that time creatively. This will stop those you care about suffering in silence over your apathy and wasted potential. Persevere with your art and find refuge there, safe in the knowledge that you can only go up from here.

Well, the way i think about it is that if you commit suicide, you wont have to face any negative repercussions.

Patronized? As if acceptance or love aren't goals of human interaction. The only thing that would make you feel worse is your own hubris, or culturally stunted perspective. Examine your exact self regard in this matter, in comparison to those you criticize, especially as you are all assumption without persuasion.

I guarentee there is something that could become an absolute passion for you that you can engulf your life in and when you do your neuroses will vanish and time and suffering will cease to exist. You only live once OP think about that. You literally should not kill yourself until you have scowered the earth and tried absolutely everything

Man, contacting people from my past has ended up both ways, good and bad, but at least there have been good moments right? It's better than all bad.... I really recommend finding an alternative to the drugs tho, it's really not good for you.

Try Jesus

but death in self is okay with you?, that is what you are trying to portray. Maybe it is best for you to put that gun to your head?, for death does not phase you.

Ya got a good point, but atm i dont have any way of obtaining one.

i have also started to experience sharp pains, that i get randomly, but i just brush it off, I'll try to get off using coke again... and get back into college and finish my program that i had started as well... but going back too the old relationships you think i just put the past behind me and start fresh? ( with new friends and such).

Seconded

Just helped you out, good luck on your adventure.

Tnx for the advice.

Nice Get btw.

i also cant buy bullets cuz i'm 16

You say you love him, but you know nothing about him. To any person of sound logical mind, this merely cheapens the whole premise of what love is, and what it means to be loved. Rather than providing reassurance, you are insulting his intelligence (and belittling his crisis) by assuming that such a meaningless and empty gesture could possibly have a positive impact on his state of mind. Rather, the shallowness of your help only magnifies the despair of being beyond help, if that is the best that can be found, sending him into a deeper spiral of depression than previously.
Good job fuckwit. Maybe try ditching the hippie shit and actually thinking for a change.

Yeah, but not really. As a living human being, you always have a shot at being able to turn things around. You have a functioning brain, you can still find a way to change your life. As a dead human being, you get to experience the nothingness, which is perhaps worse than sadness and depression.

If you're sad, it means that you're still able to feel, which is good. It means your brain isn't toast. But you're on the path to toasting it with this attitude and this mentality.


One ounce of happiness is better than an eternity of nothingness. I don't care if you live or die. I am going to forget about this when I go to sleep. But we're talking logically here. The presence of an emotion is better than the eternal lack of it. As far as we know. And what we do not know? That's death.

Imagine religion is real, and you're going to hell. Does that not scare you? What if there was something after death, and that thing was worse than your current condition?

Who told you that there is absolutely nothing after death?

All this will do is throw your hand away from your head while doing some fairly serious, but not fatal, damage.

wait OP youre only 16?
Dude watch Jordan Peterson lectures
and spend the next 5 years finding your passion and youll be ahead of 95% of top 1% of the world. You will be absolutely fine. Find new friends/life. People and the community youre in can vary greatly and change everything.

Oh, he doesn't love him. He's just saying that because that's what he'd like to hear. He's saying that because when we want to use our moral compass, we always subconsciously think about how we would feel if it happened to us. That's why people get teary and emotional when, say, a woman finds her long lost son and their meeting is emotional.

He's saying that he loves OP because he thinks that it would keep him from killing himself, or it would have some impact. His moral sense of duty is false, wanna know why? Because it's not directed at others; it's directed at himself.

I aint Op nibba

16 and you want to kill yourself? You've seen nothing of the world. All teenagers go through depression at some point, you're worsening your condition by toasting your brain with drugs. You have a very long path ahead of you and from the little things that you think you know, you just want to put an end to it? Please.

Im not suicidal, im just incredible flippant with life and death

Op isnt 16 nibba

And yet, this was directed at someone who feels like life has no value and, seemingly, whose only reason for still being alive is not having the means to put an end to it.

I'd like to turn this to you now. Judging from how you formulate your thoughts, I'd say that you're young enough for what I said to apply to you as well.

So you're saying that was his response was the way it was, because that's what he wishes for? Anyone, even a random user, to say they love him, despite it being totally unfounded and meaningless? Damn that's sad. Guess it explains why I tried to help with insight, experience and guidance, because I sure wish I could get some of that. Regardless, I just assumed it was some lefty liberal hippie bullshit. Still a ton of clueless faggots around pushing that shit.

I feel like life does have value, i just dont value it myself.

Come to think about it. We give money to the homeless because we would want other people to help us in our times of need. We treat people kindly because we want to be validated and told nice things as well. We compliment people not to be nice, but because deep inside, we want them to notice us.

We save men from dying because we want to be saved as well. We save people from despair because not only does it make us feel good about ourselves, but because every single time we do something, we take a very deep look at ourselves, and think how we would react if we were in another person's shoes. It explains why some people are homophobic; because they would hate themselves if they were in that position (because of religious indoctrination).

Every single act of kindness is inspired by selfish desires. Even romantic relationships have this kind of self-satisfaction. A man does not eat fish because he 'loves fish'; he eats fish because he loves how it makes him feel, how it tastes to him, much like in romantic relationships, we love how the other person makes us feel and realize that if anything happened to them, we wouldn't feel this happy about ourselves anymore, this proud, this satisfied.

Human beings are sad. Or I'm ranting at 2 AM.

Understandable. Is it not that you don't value your life alone? Think about the following; if a man was drowning, and you had the possibility to save his life without endangering your own, would you not do it?

I'd save him, because he probably values his own life. Im not immoral.

Have you considered Magic the Gathering? I hear it's pretty addictive. Go do an FNM and let us know how it goes.

It's up to you bro, you can still talk to your old friends and clear the tensions, maybe something might arise from that, you don't have to befriend all of them, it's really cool to move on as well and definitely try to gain some new friends. Nice trips btw

Thats an immature perspective that will pass as you age!

...

What does him valuing his own life have anything to do with you, though? You THINK that you don't care about your life. Have you ever been put in a spot where you had to do something spontaneous to save your own life? 16 years of age doesn't give you too much experience, or hindsight, in those things.

You may be right, but atm i'm just kinda living life because its the only thing to do.

Gaylord

Idfk. I probably do deep down value my life, but on the outside, i just dont care.

well just letting you know cause it happened with me my perspective changed several times when i thought it wouldnt up until age 28 and i believe now that this will happen many more times still throughout the rest of my life. bc it isnt your brains development that does it its your experiences. Protip: experience as much as you can as fast as possible

try having an intense migraine for a weeks on end followed by panic and anxiety attacks

dead inside is nothing compared to living in pain and suffering

Thanks for the advice?

K bye.

Actually I disagree with that - I don't treat others kindly for selfish reasons, but because it feels right. I believe in justice and people getting the love and happiness they deserve. I have an altruistic nature and I identify good people, seeking to bring more love into their life.

maybe it is best for me to just move forward, but i swear to god man i left my soul mate... she is the only girl that i would realy try to go back and talk to with again to make up that lost connection , and a few of my guy friends aswell that i have gotten out of contact with like i have said before.... but for now i think it is best to get one thing done at a time, cok e, smokes, school and getting in contact with old friends in the middle of that some where as well.

Good luck you will be fine I promise, never be attached to specific outcomes or conclusions tho, and never ever under estimate lifes ability to change everything you once thought and give you new values/soul mates

Nice man, don't give up your hope on your old friends tho, i'd really love to know that you'll get your life back on track. It's a process, make sure it's a safe and enjoyable one :)

This is the dude you were talking to btw

hmmm i could post the screenshot proving that you are lying but hey if it makes you feel better knock your self out.

im not sure which one of you was the same person from but thank you for talking with me. i wish you the best in luck in life's endeavours.
i believe this was you.imo.