ITT: We nerf each others' superpowers
>Ability to absorb the knowledge and brainpower of other people via touch
>No upper limit
ITT: We nerf each others' superpowers
>Ability to absorb the knowledge and brainpower of other people via touch
>No upper limit
>ability to be Op
>blow massive cocks
Bump
>Ability to absorb the knowledge and brainpower of other people via touch
>No upper limit
You have no arms or legs.
I can shit gold without hurting my ass
You can only digest gold.
you never create threads, only lurk
you have no meth available
Tiny gold flakes, nothing of any real value.
I can turn completely invisible
You completely lose the ability to ejaculate
So do you do meth? Bc from watching movies, when I see 'bump', I think cocaine
>Ability to absorb the knowledge and brainpower of other people via touch
there is a 2% chance of having a stroke everytime you do
>absolute immortality
>neither age nor physical trauma can hurt me
>mind is untouchable
You can't do anything but think and touch. You are literally a brain inside a useless ball of muscle, fat, and skin
You are immortal but not indestructible. You can be cut into a thousand pieces or blown up and you'd still be alive.
>Perfect memory
I can produce unlimited spaghetti out of my pockets.
Suffer from all diseases without being able to end the pain.
>Perfect memory
>Mute and illiterate
The ability to feel the presence of sharks within 78km of me at any given time.
All sharks are drawn to you and have a taste for your blood.
>Can communicate with the dead
>Can reincarnate into newborns after death
>Memories from previous lifes stay with me
You cannot move a single muscle in your body
The ability to know whether or not some is thinking of dicks.
You always reincarnate as a nigger
But the dead only want to talk about what you had for breakfast
>ability to see into the future
90% chance of reincarnating in terminally ill third-world-hooker babies
Must suck dick to know
You will always spill it on the floor and slip on spilled spaghetti whenever you're trying to move on foot
Always born to an abusive family that leaves you with permanent PTSD.
You know that the world is doomed
*nerf not improve
Can only communicate robin williams and Amy winehouse
you can only see what happens 1000 years or more after your death
You forget what you've seen whenever you blink or inhale
Super Speed
Faster than light movement, can vibrate through solid materials
The ability to control all molecules on a quantum and realitive levels
Magical Genie with infinite wishes
You can't do anything with that information
but only one at a time
It takes you 2 months to take a shit the size of a nut
>What do you say Sup Forums? this is true?
digitday.digitalgroupe.com
>but only from Downies.
Ability to transcend reality itself, effectively becoming immortal.
>Ability to be depressed and lonely all the time
after you transcend reality you can't return to it, so you live forever a meaningless existence
but there's always a smelly clown following you trying to cheer you up
Wishes don't benefit you in any way. You have no penis, feminine or otherwise.
>hability to have a diarrhea
They are fulfilled the moment you think of them, no matter what they are and if you really want them to happen.
He refuses to grant them all because he thinks your ideas are terrible and he has fucking standards
>have to add water
Your reaction time is that of a regular human, and you can't move at speeds below the speed of light
Have fun flying into space and asphyxiating
The ability to turn the negative stuff into good immideatly
It never stops
Perfect luck
Random events always work in your favor
Your mind is filled with nothing but negative thoughts 100% of the time and your power can't negate this
You get so lucky your brain becomes a slushie killing you instantly
but you have a perfectly positive outlook on life, so you always manage to find the good in everything.
your the midget from twin peaks
You must pray to the Goddess of Luck every morning by shoving a pineapple up your ass or you get bad luck instead
>nerf
Well I want to hang myself and I cannot stop thinking of killing myself I am so damn sad but my negativity becomes positivity so I am happy therefore I wanna live
I can teleport.
Teleporting in this scenario pushes my body into an alternate dimension in which only my soul physically exists and time is stopped. My soul takes the form of my own mental image of myself; what my subconscious considers me to be. I can, from this position, teleport anywhere I can visualize, and I am intangible. Thus, if I appear in a wall or person, I can just move slightly before restarting time and reappearing in the physical realm. To others, this will be instantaneous.
If my desired location has no room for me, like a crowd, I can advance time slowly until there is room. This will be the only time others are able to view a delay in my teleportation.
With mental training/concentration, I can extend the amount of time I can move forward while in this state, eventually being able to become a peeping tom wherever/whenever.
Upon reappearing, my soul-form becomes my physical form. Thus, as long as I'm alive, I can teleport to fix any injury/mental issue/sickness/physical fitness issues I may suffer. I can also teleport objects and other people, and the same happens to them, making me a healer as well.
>transcending reality itself to turn brain into a slushie
>therefore possessing the ability to transcend reality via sheer luck
>therefore literally having INFINITE good luck
He could just bring himself back and prevent this from ever happening again
>Your power can't negate this
Sorry user, time to get that noose
your power works as described, but you're still a faggot and disappointment to your family
Deal.
...
I mean from excitement
Completely irresistible, every single person who meets you wants to fuck.
You are able to create anything from nothing
you're permanently impotent
everything you create smells like shit
You can only do it on other people
>Ability to fuse atoms at will
You have no genitals
have to touch the atoms, can't because LOL QUANTUM MECHANICS
Shit thats actually a clever response
Your subconscious considers you to be a rather malnourished squirrel with a cocaine addiction.
>can turn into any animal at will and turn back
only works at furry conventions
>the ability to control bees and wasps to do my bidding.
the only way you can control them is through interpretive dance
Any animal wants to mate with you when you're human
>I can, from this position, teleport anywhere I can visualize
You must therefore be able to observe the material plane and make conscious decisions while in the alternate dimension. Ergo your consciousness is fully aware of your surroundings in this dimension even if your material body doesn't physically exist. Just clearing that up in case you define "mind" and "soul" as different things.
The nerf is that the dimension you find yourself in is filled with an otherworldly presence that corrodes the mortal psyche over time. The more "time" you spend in the alternate dimension choosing where to materialize, the more your consciousness drops gradually into insanity. Spending time in the material plane will not negate the corrosion of your sanity - it keeps building up every time you use the power.
>My soul takes the form of what my subconscious considers me to be
>Upon reappearing, my soul-form becomes my physical form
Your subconscious is also affected by your loss of sanity, meaning your "mental image" will become more and more deformed as your mind slowly decays from its exposure to the alternate dimension. So not only will repeated use of teleportation deform your mind, but your physical form will deform itself accordingly.
How long before you lose yourself completely and wander the material plane as a barely human monstrosity?
>always have the perfect meme for all situations
but only the ones that live in your urethra
you go blind when it happens
Too late, I'm already a faggot who is a disappointment to my family.
I can heal any wound or disease just by touching the affected person
can only post on 9gag
You get testicular cancer every time you teleport and anal cancer every time you reappear
I want to be this man
Deal. I see a new "The Tick" villian in my future.
It's always considered outdated and not funny
it's all slightly overboiled.
top kek
Thank God I'm already a faggot and a disappointment to my family. I'll stick with that over this one.
ability to create a bbq chicken pizza out of thin air
you cant go within 80km of the sea.
everyone else already has perfect immunity and regeneration
>can control body temperature