Worst sex stories thread

Worst sex stories thread

>be me, desperate and horny
>landed a solid 6/10 body, 5/10 face in a pub
>single mother, but what the fuck
>get back to my place
>turn off the lights 'cos really, 5/10 is being generous
>get to work, bit of foreplay, i needed it more than she did
>sucking on her tits, get a mouthful of milk
>kid must be younger than i thought
>swallow, jesus christ that's nasty, it's like fucking gone sour or something
>guess she stopped breastfeeding a while ago and the shit went off in her tits, what do i know, i'm not a fucking doctor
>have very forgettable forgettable sex, go to sleep
>wake up the next morning, turn over to check my conquest
>she's even worse than i remember
>decent tits though
>what's that
>right there, on her left tit, is a huge, red, angry-looking, freshly drained boil
>remember the mouthful of 'milk' from last night
>throw up on her

Jesus Christ user

Wtf puke

beat this
> be a guy
> raped by a 300# bald lesbian
> she thanked me the next morning for convincing her that she was a lesbian.

>300#
>#

Be less of a faggot

>find goth girl smoking and crying in the back yard of friend's house.
>Shes a total landwhale, smoker's voice, big tits but pale and veiny.
>her face was like a pug's, little mouth, her eyes big but tired looking.
>god fucking dammit what am I doing.
>Ask her "Hey whats wrong."
>She sniffles a bit says"Its nothing its dumb."
>chat with her a bit, trying to get her to cheer up... not even sure why I care.
>coax it out of her.
>apparently her boyfriend broke up with her for a more attractive girl.
>tell her he was a fucking asshole.
>that shes totally attractive."
>She giggles and asks"Fuckable?"
>My biggest mistake
>"Yeah totally fuckable."
>she says "Want to fuck me?"
>shit... can't say no, I told her she was fuckable.
>We duck out to my friend's shed.
>she kisses me, mashing her face to mine, her mouth tasting like an ash trey and vodka.
>having a hard time getting it up
>she pulls her tits out of her top... they were big, saggy, with big fucking bumpy nipples.
>she puts my hand between her legs
>sloppy and dripping... could be worse I guess, at least shes shaved.
>Fuck it
>Lay her down, lifts her legs and undo my pants.
>pump into her bareback
>fucking hot as hell, tight ass hell, sloppy as hell.
>ohshit.jpg
>suddenly two pumps in I nut inside of her.
>look at her ashamed.
>She giggles and says "Well I mean, it means I was really good right?"
>She gives me her number and says "I would love to fuck again."

I keep meeting up with her to try and rock her world, but I keep nutting early and embarassing myself
She isn't hot at all, shes a total pig, but I've fucked her a ton of times and still barely last.
longest I have lasted is two minutes, she didn't get off.

that sicked me me out

Made me diamonds

Post pics

>Me in college, 20 years ago.
>Get into argument with some friends about how easy it is for girls to get laid
>Fat friend, orca fat girl, is loudest in her denial
>Fatty (call her Caroline) says someone her size can never get laid
>I dig in my position, saying that she just needs to be blunt and ask a guy who doesn't give a fuck, to fuck her. And he'd do it.
>She calls my bluff, says "Would you fuck me user? I'm asking"
>To win the argument, i go "Sure"
>Cue much mockery from other friends but it kills the argument.
>That night, I realise I have to this. i hate fuck her, hating myself all the while, cum as fast as i can, which isn't very fast.
>As soon as I cum, I start getting ready to leave.
>Caroline starts getting angry and crying and shit, saying she deserves more
>I say "you wanted to me to fuck you, I never said you'd cum or it would be good"
>I really want to get out of there and drink ALL the beers....
>Angry Caroline starts freaking out because I was her first and i've given her a horrible experience
>As I leave I say "It wasn't a great experience for me either"

>be me, 15 yo with first girlfriend
>white-black mixed, with 8-9/10 body (pole dancer)
>comes at my place, parents away
>StartsGettingHot.jpg
>put it in, awesome fuck
>she orgasms, trembling and shaking
>very violent orgasm
>I cum too
>go to the bathroom
>throw the condom away
>there's a black thing on the condom, and all over my pubes
>mentally: "shit, is her blackness leaking on me?"
>I was a stupid teenager
>turns out it's shit
>she shat herself on my bed
>she shat on my dick
>I try to wipe the pussyjuice/shit mix with TP
>still filthy
>take a quick shower as if nothing happened
>she makes the bed as if nothing happened
>she leaves as if nothing happened
>bitch I'm supposed to be sleeping in your shit tonight

This is gold, you are my hero

>be driving home from class w my girl
>both super horny she starts blowing me as I drive
>I reach over her back and start fingering her
>car is all over the road
>so horny we have to pull over
>she continues to blow me as i fingerblast her pussy and asshole
>just as I start to jizz taptaptap on the window
>gf pulls her face away and I jizz ribbons in the air and on my chest
>It is her mom at the window
>so shocked i facepalm not realizing
>my gf had a sour stomach and had shit all over my fingers


go on?

>Chat with a girl online
>Arrange to meet at a bar
>Not sure how she looks, but didn't expect much. I was so desparate anything would be ok
>Suddenly see her come in, solid 10/10
>Become a total idiot and can't keep up a normal conversation
>She is telling me shit like how hard it is for her to meet guys
>Can tell she is a total psycho
>After we drink a couple of beers, she starts pushing me to make a move
>Can't. I was 20 and almost a virgin.
>Say we can go to my place (I live alone)
>She agrees smiling
>We go to my place, have a few drinks
>Suddenly she starts saying shit like "I'm bored, what can we do?"
>Clearly wants the D
>Don't know what to do. Go to the balcony
>See a shooting star and ask as a wish to be able to kiss her
>Go inside, and lean to kiss her
>she rejects me, says "I'm not drunk enough yet"
>Nervous but happy, I rushed to the kitchen and came back with a bottle of whisky
>Keep pouring her glass and asking every 5 minutes "are you ready yet?" like a total desesperate guy
>After finishing a bottle, she says ok, let's do it.
>Take her to my room
>My god those tits
>She goes on top.
>Literally after she puts my dick in, I come.
>She start saying things that I don't even remember
>I can't say anything, just be there with my autism
>Can hear her say "I'm a nimpho, you can't leave me like this. Come on get hard, come on"
>Imposible. My dick is as dead as my insides
>She goes home. Never talk to her again

I was traumatized for 6 months about this, reviving the situation every day. Couldn't even fap for months.

yo pole dancer

>way back in HS
>house party at the house of a girl in the hot girl clique
>get drunk and high
>don't know how but I find myself in a bedroom with the one ugly girl at the party
>her name is literally "grillo" (irony)
>figure fuck it I'll fucker as long as the lights stay out
> Just getting naked and someone busts in the door sees us and then backs out
>being very shallow and mean I tell her that she can never tell anyone that we started to hook up or even that we got this far and if she does I will deny it
>looking back i have no idea why that was so important to me
>thirty years later live in little hippy town on the other side of the country and she lives here too
>see her all the time and pretend I have no idea who she is

Anybody have the Minute-Man story from a few months ago?

Go ON? Jesus, what happens next? Her mom sucks your fingers clean?

I purposely only bang hot girls to avoid situations like this, but that inevitably leads to loneliness so shit happens anyway.
>>be in amsterdam
>>haven't had sex since gf dumped me like 6 months ago
>>fall into temptation of hookers/RLD
>>get drunk and high as fuck
>>go wander RLD
>>pick very sexy russian with fake tits and black hair
>>she blows me with a condom on
>>i'm playing with her fake tits
>>cum in the condom after like 3-4 minutes
>>didn't even actually fuck her
>>immediately leave
>>feel great shame on walk back to hostel
>>don't actually fuck another girl until almost a year and a half later
>>always lie and tell my friends i had an awesome hooker fuck because i'm too embarrassed to tell the truth

This just happened to me this sunday.

> fuck this fat oldie 36-ish chick
> not really hard when penetrating
> get hard inside her
> condom feels uncomfortable on my dick
> mehfuckit.jpg
> start fucking really hard
> the uncomfortable feeling goes away
> suddenly a terrible pain
> pull out to see my dick got burnt by the attrition
>didn't cum and can't fap now

>been on a bit of a dryspell
>remember girl on steam from cali
>fuck it I'll try my luck
>literally just message her "Hey want to suck my dick?"
>She says sure
>wtf? alright
>she tells me where to meet her
>meet her at an in and out
>jew nosed mexican girl... kinda ugly... fuck it.
>we eat together, chat... remember shes an artist, talk about her art a bit.
>mentions she posts in the Sup Forums drawthread all the time... pretty chill
>we go to the parking lot inbetween our cars, hers is a beat up neon.
>sit in the neon, she gets on her knees, and undoes my pants.
>dicks out, she leans in and licks my dick head.
>suddenly explode in her mouth before she even gets my whole cockhead in.
>she giggles a bit and says "Gee, didn't think I was that good."
>She keeps stroking me until I harden up again, she goes to suck my dick
>suddenly nut onto her lips and hand.
>go completely limp after this time cumming.
>offers to let me come over, embarassed as fuck so I decline.

She messages me still... even asked if I wanted to hang out. I dunno if I should

how fat?

i wouldnt turn down free bjs tbh

I had a similar night as a young man. The trauma takes long to fade.

Dear God

She wasn't put off by the fact that you were a half-pump chump, twice over? MARRY THIS GIRL.

some girls just got that pussy tight and fishwet like no other shit

>virgin

Really fat, and really tall, her tits were tiny considering how big her gut.
I would say 260
I'm so embarassed... it was nice of her to show off her tits the second time, but nutting on her after barely anything just... I dunno.
She seems nice enough, draws a lot of porn, plays video games, and is obviously very sexual

Ok there it goes

> Was 20
> Travelling with my Startup
> Leave Hotel at night to explore
> At bar meet Tiny Asian Girl
> Went full retarded German Mode
> Talking in Accent and shit
> Tell her about my then little compan like it‘s IBM or some shit
> Take her to my Hotel
> She wants to drink so i give her something from the mini Bar
> Tiny JD Bottle got her Drunk as Fuck
> Instead of Advancing she starts crying and telling me she can‘t have sex properly
> Apparently her Pussy is too tight
> Get angry and whip my dick out, almost choke her to death
> Take Spit throbbing Cock and try to jam it in her
> Too tight
> try again, it works but she screams like she‘s dieing
>Don‘t care keep fucking over her high pitched screams
>Cum so hard my Dick twitches in her for about 20 seconds
> Look down, see blood she‘s passed out
> Called Ambulance and took a Flight back home

Wonder if she survived, was a nice girl

Stay with it. Get her to slim down. There could be a sexy girl underneath the fat one.

Tie her to the fucking bed, blindfold her, tease her with feathers and silk scarves. Use massage oil all over her breasts and then eat her out with several fingers and a vibe. Make her cum so often you can spank her to orgasm or make her cum from anal. After she cums a few times, jump on board while she's still having aftershocks and she won't care if you jizz in two strokes. This has been my method with hot girls, ugly girls, fat girls, thin girls. I don't always come too quick, but with a new girl it's likely, and this way, nobody minds. Pic related.

I'll make it brief:
>Traveling sales job
>Bored and horny in a Philadelphia hotel
>Call escort service from Yellow pages (Huge mistake)
>they describe hot, 20-something escort
>"send her over!"
>45 minutes later, scrawny hollow-eyed meth zombie arrives at my room, cigarette breath, bad teeth,
>money paid, too late to bail out now
>>short BJ, condom on, start banging her doggi style
>look down, condom is cvered with blood
>wtf?
>drug-addict hooker is on the rag
>thought of AIDS, Hep C, penis goes instantly limp
>fake orgasm, throw her out, take hour long shower
TL:DR, I faked an orgasm with a skank crack ho

Yet another reading from: The Book of Things that Never Happened.

i dont think shes looking for anything long term. she also doesnt seem to give a shit about being fat
all her art is fat girls

Does she draw an ugly curly haired fat girl with hairy legs and a gap inn her teeth

yeah

Had a nose bleed on a girl once

Dude if youre not memeing you fuckle bawble lmao

jesus christ i actually almost gagged

that kinda looks like the pics shes shown me in the past... also kinda looks like her
Holy shit, so shes known? thats funny
should I hit her up again, I mean shes said she'd suck my dick again, and that she had fun

There's another thread currently about your first sexual experience, and i already posted in that, but i also feel like this belongs here. Also my only sexual interaction i've ever had.

> 19 Year old virgin
> Met a girl playing video games online
> 1 year later we're in a relationship
> Meet up in person
> Both really inexperienced
> It was like 3AM and really dark
> Went to put it in, guess i shoved a little too hard
> Tells me it hurt too much to continue
> Leave the next day (Was only there for 3 days)
> Still basically a virgin

>300#

Shes generally hated by most of the drawthread anons, go for it for the meme status

Holy shit, you are fucking awesome, if that is true.

Not much makes me gag.. But this.. THIS did so.

I havent drank enough to kill this memory yet
>Be 16 and virgin
>Winter in nebraska
>Everyone wearing 37 layers
>Be "chillin" (I want to die so badly)
>6/10 grill walks up to me
>Chats up a storm
>Inner autism awoken
>Somehow swap phone numbers
>Proceed to text her
>Turns out she as sexual as me
>Roleplay a bit
>Says she wants to try anal etc
>Schedule fucktime for next week
>Its happening
>Cant go inside house and cant find anywhere secluded enough
>Lightbulb.exe
>Ill take her to my toke spot
Cont

>my gf had a sour stomach and had shit all over my fingers

my fuking sides

Let me tell you the Story of the Pitbull.
Aka one of my worst Sex stories so far.

>Be me.
>Be 17, just moved into my first own apartment.
>Be living alone like a bum, no real food, no sleeping, only vidya and junk.
>No sex either, girls walked out of my flat before.
>Meet up with "Friend"
>Is 300 lbs Landwhale
>Landwhale likes me.
>Landwhale wants to sleep at my place.
>Let her sleep at my place.
>Only have 1 bed.
>We both sleep there.

>She tries to dirty talk me.
>Litterally looks like a pitbull.
>Cheeks hanging, dull face
>Duds hanging from chest resemble boob of pitbull
>At this point im pretty desperate
>Didnt have sex in a couple months
>Say whatever
>Put out Penus
>She happily rolls over it like its fresh Pizza
>Starts slobbering around on my dick
>I try to think of something nice
>Nohope.jpg

>After 5 Minutes or something, i pussy out.
>She stops trying to eat my cock
>Actually glad she remembered its not a saussage
>She starts crying
>Says its allways like that with boys.
>I make her go after she came down a little
>Never saw her again.


Fumiko, The Pitbull.

>shit, is her blackness leaking on me?

>Its a water run off pipeline or someshit
>Secluded, dry enough to fuck on if need be, perfect
>Before we even start we have to climb into it
> I climb over and she hands me her phone >Even with all her fucking layers she dont have pockets
>While waiting 30ish seconds (Very simple ladder) I was climbing around and broke her phone
>I was showing off hanging upside down
>Pick it up
>Cracked as a spiderweb
>"Is my phone alright user?"
>"Somehow its fine"
>"K cool"
>Finishes climbing over
>yeyeyeyeyeyeyeyeyeyeyeyeyeyeyeyeye
>Proceed with makeout sesh + tit grabbing
>Farthest Ive ever gotten
Cont

that sucks because she was really nice, she didn't even make a little joke about what happened, just emphasized how fun it was and that she wanted to do it again soon.
I dunno, maybe I should hit her up.

>Be me
>7 years old
>Be sodomized
>The End

Shes nice enough, most of the artists like her too, just do us all a favor and call her bawble next time you hook up

I just gagged

CONTINUE

Go for it. Especially if this really is her:
imfamousbawble tumblrcom archive

>be me
>virgin at 25
>always imagine having a girlfriend which i will love and she will love me and then we'll have sex
>get high on heroin once and do it with a random junkie single mother who was ~35ish, and quite fat
>the sex sucked and now i will never be able to become a wizard
>meh

tl;dr sex is way overrated

Anymore details?

I will, shes super gentle with her touch, and the little bit of licking I managed to get was fucking amazing. I just wonder if she hooks up with other people, she doesn't seem like the type to, even though she agreed really fast to me, she gave off the vibe of being a shut in, specially since her car was so fucked up.

i can never go back to loveless sex user.

>can't be sure of diseases
>don't know what she likes
>she doesn't know what you like
>don't know how weird you can get
>don't know if ass is even clean enough to eat
>no snacks and vidya after

why even bother

Participate!!!!!!! C'MON GUYZ.......... WTF... PLEAZE
FOR married guys or dudes with live-in gf s. Ever walk in bathroom after she shits??? This is a safe place to share details of odor or markings on bowl

I pooped blood for 2 days and since then I hate myself so much

yeah it's quite terrible... i still didn't get over the girl i was in love with in highschool, we weren't even together or anything ... but sometimes i still think about her and the stuff we did together etc.

now i'm going to bed because it's almost 4am and i don't want to turn this into a feels thread,

but thank you for reply user,
your opinion is valued

goodnight~

>Ask her if she wants me to eat her out
>Says yes
>Starts shedding pant layers
>36 layers left
>Start to notice shes a little big
>21 layers left
>The more layers she loses the bigger she gets
>8 layers left
>Girl is 98% fat and 2% water
>Like butter
>Dont want to make her feel bad because she has enough fat to start a candle factory
>Proceed to eat her out
>very disgusted but dont puke on vag
>fingy inserted
>Starts moaning
>2nd fingy inserted
>Moans harder
>3rd inserted
>Starts cumming
>After she's done pull out fingies
>There is shit on #3
Mfw

>Then as if a movie her daddy calls
>Her broke ass phone cant answer it
>She looks at me astonished
>I give her the same look back
>Starts sucking up layers
>23 layers on
>"Can you at least suck me off first"
>"I think I should call my dad"
>Pull out phone
>Get shit on screen
>endmenow.ppt
>She somehow doesnt see it
>Types in phone number and slips in water
>Multitasking + landwhale + water + cold
>You do the math
>Help her up
>Has shit on her face but cant bring myself to tell her
>Finishes call
>Put phone in bag
>Ride away with -1 innocence

Bump

more details man, what did she look like

>be me at 20
>going to a kind of boarding school
>big party before vacation
>ugliest chick in class comes up to me
>like really fucking ugly, shaped like a mongoloid pear with a forehead bigger than a barn door
>tells me that there is sexual tension between us, and it's best to get it out of the way
>in pure shock I say okay
>before I know it we're heading to my room
>can't get hard because of how ugly she is
>didn't wan't to hurt her, so blamed it on the alcohol and started to eat her out
>this chick was worse than a caveman
>think she has literally never shaved
>taste is awefull
>pubes are tickling my uvula
>proceeds to puke all over her vajayjay
>roomate comes in
>it's all awkward as fuck

Have another one if anyone is sinterested?

Post away

Cont.

>At bar, haven't had sex since the last story, still haunting me
>Pretty drunk, spot a hot milf
>Go over to her, start chatting
>Takes total control of convo
>5 minutes in we make out
>Next thing I remember I am in a cab she paid for since I was broke
>make out the whole way
>suddenly she whispers that we need to be quiet so we didn't wake up her daughter
>it's cool, won't wake up the little one

>get there, but have to piss before we go to the bedroom
>when I get out she is gone, don't know which door is for her room, open the first one I see
>on the bed there sits a hot emo chick ca my age, asking what the fuck I am doing in her room
>"wrong room, sorry"
>proceed to fuck the mother for sometime
>she is a screamer
>couldn't stop thinking about that poor girl, listening to some dude her age fucking her mom
>their dog jumps into bed and licks my face the entire time
>can't cum, fake orgasm
>wake up to this uggly, wrinkly and saggy chick who had to be at least 50
>panic and try to sneak out
>acedently flip over som shit at the night stand
>she wakes up, and wants round nr 2
>can't tell her no
>fuck her again out of sympathy
>get home and take the longest shower of my lfie

You're not the only one to hook up with bawble

shall I share?

Sorry for bad writing, it's 4 am here

Yes, please

>drunk as fuck
>getting driven home by a ugly fat girl
>horny as fuck, don't care where I stick it
>talk about sex,what I like, get her to talk about it
>get hard, take it out , put her hand on it
>she pulls into a side street
>she strips off her shirt, long tube, floppy tits
>tells me she's on the rag...
>doesn't even kiss, goes right to blowing
>her teeth are scratching me badly
>tell her to watch the teeth
>she tries, keeps scratching painfully
>I swat her, ask her what the fuck, she cries a little
>please, just do the tip
>she does, a little better but my shaft is sore
>just want this to be over
>let me cum on your tits
>she leans back on her seat
> she lifts her saggy udders
>I jack my sore dick furiously
>blow a load on her sad stretched floppers
>drives me home, shame
>fuck her a few days later when she's not on the rag

Yes

Why the hell didn't you head back to the girl's room? You hadn't cum and she'd been guiltily masturbating listening to you plow her mom. You two could have revenge-fucked all morning.

Did not think of that, pretty sure she would throw me out though. Still would have been hot to have her lick her moms juices of my dick.

...

>be me
>fall madly in love with 1st ever girlfriend
>we are young and I never get the chance to make a move
>some years later
>have small pool party with parents gone in middle of day, drink tons of liquor
>black out
>come to holding her my arms in the pool
>move my hands up to her breasts and molest her furiously, she loves it
>fuck on my bathroom floor, go up to bedroom floor
>keep pulling back to rail her extra hard and end up pulling out
>her jelly friend comes to break up the sex
>find out I had wrestled her into my arms in the pool first place by tossing her around
>some days pass, want to fuck again, know we are both going to a party
>she calls me the day of the party to apologize and that I shouldn't expect sex
>totally ruins my day, after a few drinks at the party I get sad and walk to the nearest Wendy's
>eat a delicious, greasy baconator
>come back to party
>drink more, lay on couch
>girl user comes up to me and starts talking to me
>make a move, go upstairs to fuck
>fart every time i thrust because of the baconator
>haven't fucked her since

z

my fucking hero you are a legend haha