What's the worst review you've ever read?
What's the worst review you've ever read?
Gabriel Sanchez
Other urls found in this thread:
consequenceofsound.net
rateyourmusic.com
pitchfork.com
amazon.com
twitter.com
Brayden Wright
>MBDTF 6/10
/thread
Cooper Bailey
Probably one of those pages-long schizophrenic ramblings from RYM that describes a person's every action throughout a day, complete with dialogue, and has literally nothing to do with the album at hand
Matthew Adams
that one autechre review by pitchfork that they wrote in the form of a play
Samuel Phillips
rolling stone's review of 'songs of leonard cohen'
>calls cohen's voice awful
>says half the songs are "flaming shit"
>says only 4 songs are worth anything
>calls it pretentious and a bad bob dylan parody (??)
>still gives it 5/5
Jason Peterson
...
Nolan White
...
Henry Perez
I can't believe that actually exists
Jonathan Wilson
those always annoy me
Juan Watson
...
Samuel Cox
...
Parker Reyes
"Melodic"
Kevin Flores
...
Connor Reyes
Some early Souvlaki reviews make me wanna cry
Sebastian Ross
Christgau wrote this about Hot Rats:
Doo-doo to you, Frank--when I want movie music I'll listen to "Wonderwall." C
and he also called ITCOTCK 'ersatz shit'
how does that retard have a job again?
Aaron Martin
Pure Guava [Elektra, 1992]
It's to the half-credit of these Bucks County wise guys that the studio amenities of their major-label debut impel them toward fucked-up sounds, which come hard, rather than fucked-up songs, which they write without thinking (and how). But I don't buy the claim that they'll do anything for a laugh. Ever since they went on about pussy for nine minutes (good idea) in a Princey blues-minstrel drawl (bad one), I've assumed they were the kind of rec-room gigglefritzes who enjoy a good nigger joke when they're sure their audience is sophisticated enough to enjoy it. And to be perfectly honest, I don't hear one of those here. C+
Xavier Rivera
Any Pitchfork review written after 2009.
John Reed
That one RYM review of Tiger Trap or some other twee album, you know the one.
Kevin Gonzalez
those old p4k reviews are ghastly. i remember that super popular everclear album getting 8.2
Jordan Campbell
Also before.
Alexander Phillips
this is awful
Carter Fisher
Matthew Peterson
Why would you go and post that on the internet. You're better off writing your fantasies on a diary.
Daniel Brooks
this
Bentley Sanchez
rateyourmusic.com
Literally anything this dude writes.
His Madvillainy is the most pretentious thing ever written.
Connor Garcia
Holy fucking shit dude. And it's actually really well written for how horrifically deluded it is. This guy needs prayers.
Thomas Foster
but zaireeka is literally shit. its "lets do something wacky even though artistically it has no value at all" core
Lucas Campbell
this dude has zero credibility at all. He have Slipknot and Skrillex 4/5 but Madvillian a 1.5/5
the fuck
Camden Garcia
they've mostly disowned their old 0.0 reviews
Ryder Barnes
did this actually happen? because I could believe it
Liam Peterson
Christopher Campbell
...
Christian Baker
how does this guy exist
who listens to so much stuff that they hate
Aaron Adams
PROG-FAGS BTFO
Aiden Evans
came here to post this
Mason Williams
Pitchfork's review of Lateralus
Hudson Green
Can't find him right now, but there's this one Amazon reviewer who gives one-star ratings to universally acclaimed albums and instead recommends the listener try "real music" like [insert obscure hard rock/metal group here].
Carter Harris
Review of a gigantic box set featuring the complete recordings of Charley Patton:
>Charlie Patten is pretty cool and stuff, I heard his records and there pretty dope and he's got the blues and can scarcely be satisfied, but if you wanna hear some real DOWN-HOME gritty ol skool dity blues, check out KEB MO. When I listed (and you listen) to Keb Mo' you can just smell that cotton, you feel like you're on a mystical plantation and ol Scratch is peekin' out from behind the shack waitin' for you to stroll down to the crossroads with you're Les Paul on your back. On Pattin's CDs, its recorded so bad that all you hear is loud scratches like fingernails on chaukboard!!!!! LOL!!!! It's cool for a history lesson, but let's get down to the nitty gritty please! Keb Mo' is the way to go' fo' sho, although Kid Johnny Lang is way up there too.
Ayden Nelson
No one will top this
Jason Gray
Pitchfork's review of the Foetus album Love
Fantano's review of The Age of Adz is up there too
Benjamin Brown
that rating must of come long after, because there's no way the review was a 5/5. it reads like a 3/5 at best
Angel Bell
>bad bob dylan
>5/5
thats rolling stone for you I guess
Kayden Rodriguez
Christgau wants to fuck black boys, what's new?