Today I fucked up

Today I fucked up.

I just got back home from fucking a hooker. I went to her flat, it started out fine with a bj (average) and followed by some sex (missionary) with one of her condoms. I switched to doggy and started hitting it a little harder, then, suddenly, it started feeling really good.

It took me a good 5 seconds to realise there were some weird plastic noises going on. In a sudden panic, I quickly pulled out and there it was, the condom had broken! There was only the base around my dick and a big chunk of yellowish plastic flapping about from it.

She wiped my dick with some wet towels, then she finished me with a handjob, and I went straight home.

Now I'm fucking scared I could have gotten infected by some STI or some sort.

Wtf do I do? Is there a way to reduce the risk of infection?

I tried washing it with soap and water, then wanted to try something stronger, so I put some 90% alcohol I had lying around (it stings btw), and now I'm writing this shit.

Any suggestions?

pic related, it's a hooker (mine didn't even look as good fuck my life)

u dun goofed

get that aids drug you take the day after its not expensive plus thats the only real bad thing you could have gotten

what you have to do is get a syringe (a turkey baster will do) and shoot about 6 oz. of alcohol up your penis.

that's what they'd do at the hospital.

you have to hurry, though.

do it today

>Today I fucked up.
>>>/reddit/

Uhh, did you try asking her if she had anything?

you don't have much left, have fun for the remaining time.

>Any suggestions?

lop off your penis as quickly as possible before the infection spreads.

Doctor here.
This works, also works for nasal and inner ear infections.

You're less likely to catch a std from a hooker than from a one night stand if that's what you're wondering

Only thing you have to reasonably worry about is Herpes, and thats only if she was in an infectious stage.

AIDS is very hard to get through normal sex unless either party has an open wound on their junk. Everything else is curable for the most part. Relax and go get a test before fucking someone else so you don't spread anything. If you caught chlamydia or gonorrhea you'll likely know pretty quick because it will burn to pee. Relax fam.

I did ask her "you clean?" (she didn't speak good english, she was eastern european or something) and she said yes, but who the fuck trusts a hooker? Chances are she doesn't even know what the fuck she has, and even if she knew, she would not say "no" by fear of losing a client

Get checked

I do have a syringe for cleaning out ears in my flat, and I have a bottle of 90% alcohol. Should I do it? I don't want to burn off my dick

nurse here can confirm

Use an std test kit. Also relax, it'll be fine.

Definitely do it. It's the only way to make sure. Kill that infection before it travels all the way up the urethra

that's the only chance you have OP

Thank you, Doctor.

The other cure is to stick your dick into a hot chicken -225 degrees- for about ten minutes to kill off any of the infectious organisms that are by now infecting the blood of his dick.

get the post-HIV exposure drug. Just pray she doesn't have shit like herpes, Just about everything else is curable.
You either wait out the dormant period and get a symptom and treat it or get a full std test in a month or 2.
STDs usually have an incubation stage so getting tested right now will be a waste of time.

sounds like a pretty shitty experience, i'm planning on going to a hooker in a few days, i'll bring my own condoms

Id rather die from AIDS than have herpes the rest of my life. Also hepatitis is a real bitch. Dying from liver failure is one of the worst ways to go

>nurse here can confirm

Been acting as a nurses aide for 3 years now. I can also recommend the syringe / alcohol method. Easy to accomplish, this usually falls to me whenever the need arises in the office.

...

Do this, or also you dip the penes in a glass of rubbing alcohol and reverse pee. It's cleans you out to the kidneys.

I've been barebacking hookers for years. They always syringe my dick.

not a nurse or a doctor but i do this all the time after i fuck my dad and im still clean

thank you, Nurse. I appreciate your confirmation.

As a genital professional, I have to ask OP if her vagina resembled any of these.
Study them closely and pick out the one that most nearly approximates the hooker's gooch.

>reverse pee

Literally wot?

It is not so bad. You have more chances of catching STDs from a girl you pick in a bar because normal people tend to leave their guard down.

Go and take the anti HIV drug others mentioned ITT. Aside from HIV, HPV and HIV everything is curable. HPV goes away on its own in a few months/years and herpes isn't really that big of a deal.

Meant for

how would you know that faggot

>Tfw prostitution is legal in Germany and I just want to get my dick sucked but have gf
Reeeeee

>filename
kek

im a Registered Respiratory Therapist here, just today we had someone come in the office for our hospitalist and it was due to an STD related issue, i stepped out of the room but afterwards the doctor told me what he did, it needs to be ATLEAST 6 oz! its very common to not inject it deep enough which will not help anything. the ENTIRE infection must be killed so dont take a half measure here man dont fuck around

AIDS Bro

HOW WOULD YOU KNOW THAT HE SHOULDN'T KNOW THAT, FAGGOT?

Reverse pee

That really is the best option at this point.

>reverse pee

im a taxi driver and i can confirm this works

Hey op i have a lot of experience with hookers...strugling sex addict
ive banged probably 100ish hookers
som willingingly bare, some i just took the condom off without telling them and had chlamydia and gonorhea multiple times and got oral herpeson my cock from a crappy 5 min bj that didnt even make me nut
from my experience pros that dont offer bare and only use condoms for the most part are clean.
girls that offer it up bare or dont freak out about the condom breaking or coming off are the ones to worry about.
that being said the chances of you contracting hep or hiv are low.
chances of sti like gonorhea chlamydia or trich contraction are greatly diminished if you had a good healthy piss right after you finished. that being said its just a does of anti biotics and youre good
herpes is up in the air
best bet is to take a couple weeks off from sex and see what happens... look for discharge or tender nuts, swollen glands on the sides of your pubic hair. and get tested to be sure.
but seriously im doing all i can to stay away from hookers and i suggest you do the same

> (You)
>>filename
>kek

another preventive medical treatment is to use live gerbils up your ass and they attack the disease from the inside.

this is known as the Richard Gere method

Go check it with a doctor asap

this doesn't negate the fact that you're from reddit
or that you're a bona fide faggot

I doubt she secreted her vaginal fluid onto your dick. But you might have the faggots blood in your veins now so only thing you can do is get checked

Original MD here,
The alcohol will cause discomfort and maybe some pain depending on a number of factors regarding your cardiovascular health however you will not "burn your dick off."
We use a severely diluted solution with less alcohol however you wouldn't have access to it without a medical supplier.
I wouldn't suggest using 90% volume for an ear infection, but you're fine using it for nasal or otherwise.
It will work for most infections depending on the amount of time that has passed.

gotta give it a little bit. getting tested the day after exposure wont show shit.

I would confirm on google before doing that, it sounds like it would fuck up your dick. If infected it likely already spread.

THIS DOESN'T NEGATE THE FACT THAT YOU ARE FROM REDDIT TO KNOW THAT I'M A BONA FIDE FAGGOT

>and I'm not even that faggot that you were replying to in the first place

biggest load of 3rd world horse shit ive ever heard. all you niggers trying to get this guy to fuck up his cock. so some damn compassion you pieces of shit

friends with a guy whose neighbours dad is a doctor, can confirm.

This is the compassion of Sup Forums

this fag

>It took me a good 5 seconds to realise there were some weird plastic noises going on. In a sudden panic, I quickly pulled out and there it was, the condom had broken! There was only the base around my dick and a big chunk of yellowish plastic flapping about from it.
>She wiped my dick with some wet towels, then she finished me with a handjob, and I went straight home.

Wash it with betadine. Inside and out. ASAP.

I knew a doctor who barebacked hookers for years and always did this. Claimed to have never gotten an STI.

Pick related.

This. Even if you get herpes you'll probably have like 3 breakouts and never have another one again in your entire life.

OP here, given we have so many healthcare professionals (and taxi drivers) in this thread, is there a name for this procedure so that I can look it up? My health and my dick are at stake here! I don't want to turn a shitty day into an even shittier hospital-emergency day

Uhm, are you mentally disabled?

Youre as bad as the stupid millenial fags not knowing what newfag means but still using it unironically. Pull the trigger, please.

im a hooker and i can confirm this works

i'm a retired white knight, and i can confirm it works
godspeed OP

So if I told you that the way I was trained to treat a disemboweled car accident victim, was to tape them shut. Tape them. You would probably say the same thing.
I studied at one of the best schools in North America.

stop fighting broskis

go to the doctor and get some antivirals asap (like right now). this could possibly protect you from HIV

alright dr strange love i'll learn to stop

I'm a mechanic and I sometimes play recreational water polo at the weekends and I can confirm that the procedure dose in fact work.
I forget the medical term for it though.

don't fucking do this OP you idiot

thanks, that makes me feel a bit better. I'm still freaking out a little. It was only my third time with a hooker and I hadn't gone to see one in years
I might try the betadine thing. Worst case, I just end up with a sparking clean dick!

Window Washer here
the correct name for this is the Nigger

Don't listen to this guy, he's the devil.

JESUS says use the turkey baster with the alcohol.

He should know, he's the Son of God.

I have a funny hooker story that happened to me recently, anyone want to hear? Pic related is her

Temporary triage care methods aside. I dont think your doctor i think your lying dipshit. you want me to believe you squirt alcohol up dudes junk for std's then link me to a fucking medical site supporting that claim. otherwise eat a bag of dicks

>the correct name for this is the Nigger
sounds legit. A Nigger Manoeuvre coming up!

I can spell doctor, can confirm as well

go ahead

Don't ask, just fucking mash some green text faggot!

Dont listen to this guy hes clearly lying to you

I hope this guy doesn't shoot alcohol up his penis, I did a Google search for this and found nothing legitimate.

Listen to this guy, he seems very honest.

You're going to listen to the guy who has admitted to banging countless hookers, the guy who makes up miracle drugs out of thin air, and the guy who thinks STD test kits are anything more than highway robbery for dolts?
No, you have 12 hours from the point of potential exposure (at best) until you're effectively shooting alcohol up your dick for fun.
Turkey baster would be less painful than the one you have, as you could create a seal around the tip as opposed to inserting something.
I suggest you do this asap. I'll remain in the thread in case you have any questions following the procedure.
This procedure has no specific name, it falls into a broader range of treatments.
The only one with its own name is an Enema which specifies the rectum.

>I did a Google search for this and found nothing legitimate.
You did it wrong. It's all there

He better do it soon before his penis is fried.

I have a doctorate in literature, so I too am a doctor and can confirm

The medical profession isn't Graphic Design, you can't figure it all out in 15 minutes of YouTube and Google.
I bet you couldn't find results on google for 80% of what I know.

Son't listen to this guy, he's trying to deceive you.

And then you'll die because it's too late and you'll have to bag your penis

This guy is a huge lying faggot.
You can tell because of the recurring 5's.
Mods always reserve 555's for the biggest faggots. It's sort of like a game they play.

Same thing happened to me but not with a hooker.
>be me
>be 21
>make the move on 40yo milf
>got bj
>banging doggy
>Dry old coochie
>all of sudden
>feelsreallygoodnow.bmp
>OMG condom broke!
>be me now 37 and that's the story of how I contacted HPV (better than HIV nigger)
SMH

Same MDfag here.
HPV clears from the body in 90% of all cases within 3 years.
The other 10% can be cured with simple antibiotics.
Get it taken care of before it causes Cancer.

I work for the cable company, and can confirm that this works.

Drink a bunch of water and then piss. Pissing after sex helps fight off uti's.

fuuuuuuuuuuck

i'm professional windshield washer and confirm this is only way to make good dick. here in russia we do inject alcohol several times day. 100% save to kill virus!

I'm an astronaut and can confirm. Space pussy will FUCK you up bro.

Just wash your dick with anti bacterial soap, if you are really that afraid go to a genital doctor to make some tests. Most likely all her costumers use condoms so actually its more likely to get an infection for the blow job rather than from her pussy.

Human Papilloma Virus
>antibiotics
>for a fucking virus

>Wtf do I do?
¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Nigger there is no cure, they have a (((vaccine))) to prevent spread if you don't have it already, and treatment for any symptoms that come about from having the virus. Go inject alcohol into your dick, (90%) works best from what I hear.

>Being this retarded

>Anti-bacterial
>Viruses
Fucking idiot

>one of her condoms
idiot

I once seat in a seat a doctor seat once and i can confirm.

inject some alc into your balls too just to be sure

btw i'm a biologicol engineer with a ptsd in viral infections