Hey Sup Forumsros, how about a feels thread, dump some sad shit into here some stories and feels...

Hey Sup Forumsros, how about a feels thread, dump some sad shit into here some stories and feels, lets get some shit off of our chests.

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youtu.be/e__1KU7lg-4
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Trying not to kill myself, as I have relapsed back into the sadness that I ignored for the last week.

I also don't want to die, because I'm scared of what happens afterwards.

I just want something beyond my control to happen so it can make the choice for me.

Texas A&M blew a 44-10 lead to UCLA to lose the game.

Nothing happens after. You just stop living.

...

i dont know what to do anymore; lost all sense of purpose. i used to live to serve and look after my family, but they dont need me anymore. and im alone again.

i get sour as fuck when i check out classmates facebooks and old pictures of them having fun. everyone my age, im 29, is settling down and shit.
i get even more salty when i see their younger brothers or undergraduates close by that i remember doing fun shit.
i have rich parents, have a boat, have land, have four wheelers, have all sorts of shit but never was able to fit in or get friends beyond loser sausage fests. i get sour as fuck being in the boat with my parents while other rich kids with their daddys boat are out partying with bikini girls. i hate it when parents ask me "why dont you invite a girl and be like them?", even at 29 years old.
they never understood that i wasn't associated with rich because i hold a different last name. people talk so much shit too.
life passed me by man. and i saw it coming and couldnt do much about it. gay rumors also dont help.

one thing i do see is that the nerdy friend i made were actually very nice people and not dicks at all. all the normie kids dealt with getting ripped off on drug sales, trying to one up eachother, gossip and stupid shit.

though i hated coming to family functions single while even the kids were getting partners like crazy. thanksgivings were the worst.

My life has been turbulent lately.
>lost job
>lost gf of 2 years
>owe parents $1000 or i move out
>heart issues
>only 17
my life is fucked. I was gonna go to college, but i dont have the money. its either miserable life or miserable death.

17 b&

going to college doesn't mean shit, mate. as for the gf, its hard being young and breaking up with a long term gf, believe me. I was with a girl from when i was 15 untill i was 19. I'm 23 now and looking back on it i resent her, i wasted the best years of my life with her. you'll be fine. I'm sure.

Thanks. shes just trying her damn best to ruin my reputation, but i ignore the cunt. and i guess i could get a decent low education job.

Possibly lost my best friend of 8 years today. It might not be that big of a deal, but my mind is freaking out thinking of the worst scenario. Already lost a close friend this year as well since people move on. Ah, it's unfortunate but i guess people move on in life. Still hurts regardless.

Hey guys, today has been a pretty shitty day for me, mind if I indulge my general depression by telling you guys some stories? I greentexted them in advance, Sorry if its annoying. Just say yes or no if you want them. Anyway, sorry in advance.

Well, there was an user that made a thread the other day. His girl had him shave his chest and she took a dump on it, and it got infected.
Long story short, I don't know if the advice given, led him to melt his chest off or not.
That should cheer someone up.

Don't be sorry. I would like to see them. It's healthy for the body when you talk about whats making you feel down.

Why.

Well, I'm 19 and dropped out of highschool at 16, played vidya ever since. Parents stopped smoking a couple years ago but started again and my dad blames me. All I want to do is play vidya for a living but I know the chances of that is small. Don't want to be stuck working a miserable 9-5 so I'll probably kill myself if I'm stuck doing that by age like 26 or something. Not sure what else to put here so just ama and I'll answer asap

Life is stale as usual.

Are you even remotely good enough to go professional playing these games?

I'm good at games but I'm not talking about playing esports. Talking more entertainment (streaming)

Have you tried streaming yet?

I don't know. He was the one that let her do it. Some anons were arguing about what he could use to help it. Kind of a funny thread.

Yea I stream now but I'm not consistent and I don't know how to get over my laziness to become consistent. I also have an issue with patience so that doesn't help

I would like to know why he thought that would be a good idea.

what happened?

+interest

You know how many times I've heard someone I trust, someone I look up to and someone who seems to be right and above me in comprehension of the situation, say that?
That someone would be ok?
And you know what happens?
I feel reassured, only to the same day for me to be right;
I remember w/ my brother, my sister and parents assured me that he was fine, he had the flu and I was worried. I was sure that he was gonna die that day, but they made me feel like he was gonna get better
That same day he died
I got a phone smacked from my hand and broken while trying to call 112, I was 5yrs old, it was when we were finding out;
I can give other examples, like our Sugarglider
One morning, he was barking a lot and sitting in one spot of his cage
I was saying he could be dying and needed to go to the vet
Once again I feel like he's gonna be ok
I came home from school to hear from my father "You were right about Almond", do you know how hard that hit me?
But from my experience, I can't trust someone who I otherwise would when they say someone I love will be fine;
When I was 8, my best friend was sick. I remember being told he would get better, one day when I was gonna visit him I got told he died;
I remember how I talked to him the week before, he seemed so much more lively than before and I was so happy that he was getting better. I remeber telling him I'd see him next week, excited leading up to the day, and just the day when I was supposed to visit him was when it happened
I felt tricked, and everyone said he would be better;

Some people are into kinky stuff.
It can backfire sometimes, but they keep doing it.

What games do you stream? If you want to make that your occupation then you need to have motivation for it. Easier said than done, but you have to realize that everyone starts from nothing. Sounds cheesy but Rome wasn't built in a day, bud. You could always buy some fake view bots to help the ball start rolling until you get more recognized.

I can't

hug me user, hug me

...

Holy shit I turned that off, thought it was over

I stream mostly Pubg which is now a very saturated game, but I also stream games like life is strange, overwatch sometimes and car mechanic simulator. Also I've though a lot about getting a viewbot just for like 15-20 viewers max just to put me higher on the list so I'm not buried in the thousands of 0-3 viewer streams. The motivation part is what gets me the most though

Drunken mistakes. He keeps ensuring me before i left his place that we are still cool, but was sitting by the pond and drinking. He said it would the best if i just left. I always tend to think of the worst. Who knows, tomorrow he could call me and everything will be alright, or it wont. I will have to see.

did you impregnate his girl or steal a lot of money from him or something? did you just say he was a fag or something?

I feel ya man I have 5 nieces and nephews, all in relationships and I have never had a gf my entire life, shit can make a man feel down at times but if it gets worse think of the pic in this post You too bud refer to pic in post

Last time I saw one of these threads it turned into a race issue thread, and then a nigger gore thread. And I bet just by saying this I'll end up starting one.

Shut your nigger whore mouth

...

Yeyeye post it bud we are her for you

nothing worse than an abusive, manipulative coward

done now

Have you ever thought of working out? For me it helps add routine to your schedule, helps build time management and seeing little improvements in your exercise helps adds motivation to do more than just that work out for the day. If you don't i HIGHLY suggest it. Feels extremely peaceful when you have a good diet and exercise regularly.

I finger blasted his wife to oblivion. He was okay with it but i guess when she woke up she was pretty fucking pissed.

Agreed. Lurk on /fit/ more and start getting healthy. I don't want to say it's a panacea but you will defenently feel better

True user, having a schedule can help quite a bit

oh shit. I can see why it would be "better if you left".

I imagine the following is true:
>she didn't know you were going to do it before you started
>she's really mad at you via him
>he's not getting any pussy for a long time while that fades
>he's banned from hanging out with you
>he may or may not want to hang with you but he's not getting any access to the pussy if she finds out he hasn't been shunning you

Thought about it yea, but that's another part of my laziness I guess. I would love to get in shape but I just can't push myself to do it. I feel like I need a partner to force me out of my comfort zone and help me not feel lonely while working out

Work out at home

I'm 22, almost an engineer just need to finish my thesis. Never gone out with a girl, never kissed a girl never nothing, i don't have many friends, my best friend from high school lives in another country, I'm at a point where I don't know what the fuck to do anymore with my life.

Am I you?

Yeah, I'm exactly that way....

Another big issue is my diet. I don't have a job so I just eat what my parents buy which is usually shit food

This. It's a lose/lose situation for me regardless. I either fucked up their relation, fucked up our friendship, or both. Just for a few minutes of "fun" i guess. I can't really talk about it to anyone so its rather nice to be able to talk about it on here, even if it means facing the truth. Had to learn the hard way to never do some dumb shit like that again, with a hefty price to pay for it.

Shit look at that I'm not alone

Yea its no fun. How much do you weigh?

Guess I'll start.

Well nothing too bad, but I know I'm only hiding my darkest secrets by wasting my time playing fire emblem heroes all damn day.
I have secrets in my past that are best bottled up. Explaining it in person is like explaining you saw bigfoot or a unicorn. You have no idea where to start and it ends up becoming a mess by the end of it.
Sure I can easily do it, but only over a screen where I can easily think it out.
I also have major social anxiety that pretty much stops me from ever starting conversations with people. What can I talk about? Unless you have interest in memes, pokemon, fire emblem, or any of the such, then what am I supposed to say? People tell me that I can easily become a social butterfly, because I'm so nice, but I'm always s paranoid. Paranoid that people think less of me because I have flaws. And sometimes I'll resort to unhealthy means too help cease these flaws.When I think I'm too fat, I'll cut meals. Part of me thinks I want to only be loved by being thin, while the other side of me says I'm only doing this for attention. I just want to be perfect for anyone, and I have this weird goal of wanting to be better than everyone else. And if a person is better than me, or has talent, wave after wave of envy looms over me like clouds on a rainy day. I know with all of these unhealthy burdens, once I finish school, whose gonna stop me from eventually listening to voices inside my head and kill myself? Current thought, I'll most likely kill myself before the age of thirty

out of curiosity was this the first time?

Go grocery shopping on your own, I did it for a while when I lived on my own. I was pretty ripped for a while.

>Where do you think we are?

youtu.be/e__1KU7lg-4

No job and no desire to get one

That any of use did that? Yea, first time experimenting. Unfortunately we were drunk off our asses. I knew exactly what i was doing but i guess she didn't. He seems rather pleased with it until she freaked out about it.

do you have your own girl? how long have you known your friend's gf?

W O R K

>pro tip: illegal jobs pay better

oh cool, so tell us how the times that youve died

>sell drugs
>selectively scam dealers
>rob small timers
>general scams and extortion
>car hopping and selling goods
You get the idea

>be me, 13
>Definitely a mama's boy
>Dad was a former marine, now in civilian life, an authoritarian prick
>Mom always saved me though
>Might of had a little oedipal thing going on, but mostly just thought she was awesome
>Never took any shit from my dad
>Anyway, she and I are driving to a relative's wedding
>10 hour drive, we stop at a hotel for the night
>I'm playing DS and watching TV
>Mom says she's going to go to the hotel bar
>Whatever
>I get tired and go to bed
>Woken up later by the sound of my mother giggling
>She was shushing someone too, but still giggling
>I wasn't sure what was going on, but I decided to pretend to be asleep
>Then went into the bedroom
>(Room was a suite with a separate bedroom. I was on the pull out couch.)
>Knew she had a man with her. At first, figured they were just going to do more drinking
>Heard a lot of giggling... then moaning
>Sounds you don't want to hear your mom making
>Things you never want to hear your mom say
>"Jesus Christ that thing is huge."
>"Oh fuck me! Fuck me with your big dick!"
>Could hear the bed squeak
>Mother moaning and him grunting
>By now I had figured out what was going on
>Part of me wanted to run in there and stop them
>But instead I just pulled the pillow over my head and tried not to listen.

And that's how I found out that my mother really is a slut.

Thought about selling drugs at one point actually, had everything necessary to do it except for guts

Nah, i broke up with my girlfriend 2 months ago. Probably was sexually frustrated that night. A sad excuse. I have known her for about a little over a year.

It's the easiest shit. 80% customers aren't a threat, minus the snitching risk. It's SOME dealers/hoods you need to watch out for. Smoke ice before a sketchy deal and you won't be afraid of shit. I'm assuming you have the right self defense.

Alright I'll post it.
>Be Me, 14 years old.
> Filthy Jew faggot, parents wanted me to go on a birthright trip with some "friends" that I had known for a while in middle school.
>For the rest of this trip, I will be referring to this as the Israel trip.
>Attended this school from 1st Grade to 8th, in 8th we go to Israel.
>School shilled the trip to make us stay there, was a pretty shitty education, for they didn't teach some essential shit properly, fucked me later in high school.
>Arrive at Jerusalem airport, normal shit, faggots ignoring me like they had normally done throughout my time there.
> A Day and a 1/2 in, tired, we are going to the underground western wall
>Note about the trip: We were going with 2 other middle schools.
>On way to the place, fall asleep due to jet lag.
>FirstIncident.jpg
>I fall asleep next to a guy on the bus, Dickhead doesn't even try to wake me up.
>Nobody notices me, like usual.
>Stuck with Israeli bus driver
>Somewhat dazed and confused, go with bus driver to his parent's house.
>Dude speaks no english, have no idea what he is saying.
> At this point, I feel bad for him, due to the fact that this faggot just showed up (me).
>Get back to the group, at the wall.
>A group of 40 jewish children, including the ones i knew, all look at me, and start laughing at me.
>This is when I realized that life was not going to work out well for me.
>Worst part however, was not the fact that the kids were laughing at me, that was expected, save a few.
>The worst part was the fact that the chaperones, teachers of mine, were also laughing, and did not try to help me in the slightest.
>I trusted these people, and this act of negligence, in addition to 2nd incident (coming soon), almost sent me off the deep end, thought about an heroing.

>Back to the story
>I then watch everyone i thought I knew, slowly cave to peer pressure.
>AsExpected.jpg
>Fast forward to a few days later.
>Friend of many years up to that point invites me to talk in his room.
>2ndIncident.exe has started running
>Go into friend's room, lets call him Zach
>Zach then, along with 2 other faggots
>They then take me, place me under the sink, place towel tight on my face, and pour water.
>Waterboarding.jpg
>Too scared, brain gets sensation of drowning
>Throw up a little, immediately goes back into mouth.
>This, although it was only 2 minutes, felt like an eternity.
>Especially because it was by someone I trust, in addition to the 2 guys who helped him (also trusted them)
>Walk out stunned, lost faith in humanity.
>...

>After Israel Trip
>I attempt a form of communication with this man, after about 3 weeks of minimal communication with the outside world.
>During this time, I attempted suicide.
>Parents thought I was being overdramatic.
>Probably was.
>Back to the story
>I skype this man,
>I ask him "Zach, why did you waterboard me?"
> He replies "Well user, I just wanted to. And you were the easiest to do it to because I knew you wouldn't resist."
> I have not spoken to him since.
That day has haunted my memory for years now, because it is a constant reminder of how I can never truly trust anyone, and how even those who you think understand, never will. Thank you for listening in on my faggotry.
>Flash Back to week before end of school.
>Depressed as shit, look around to see if anyone cares about what just happened.
>As normal, nobody does
>In fact, school attempts to cover up the issue, and pretends like it didn't happen (The bus incident that it, not the waterboarding)
>Even if the waterboarding got out to beside the kids, Zach's parents have enough money to "make it all go away".
>I confront the school about the bus issue, they say it was a problem and won't happen again.
>I know its bullshit, but i let it go.
>However, my parents (my mother) stopped supporting the school (My dad wanted to pretend like nothing happened)
All in all, lesson is to never trust kids, or people in general. I learned that lesson the hard way.
Anyway, that's my story, sorry for bothering everyone.

You should stop being one. You're just hurting people in the end.

I hope it blows over bro. give it a little time, it's also possible she liked it and wanted more but didn't want to seem like a slut in front of everyone.

Uhh i hate myself for being autistic and having ADD

just become a neo-nazi and show dem kikes who's boss. take out your frustration out on your "people" for betraying and belittling you.

I just wanna get this off my chest. I'm not depressed or anything i assume to be in the state of depression. I don't have any active social media pages and no close relatives.Growing up i was poor due to the fact that my dad was a first generation immigrant and barely spoke any english. He worked his ass off cooking chinese food for white people at a 12 hours a day for minimum wage job. Looking back at it, he was the toughest person ive ever met trying to support me and my little brother by himself but that doesnt excuse all the wrong hes done in my life. Hence why my name is now in the foster system. Because he had me when he was young, he didnt know how to be a parent and my mom wasnt in the picture. My dad and i had respect and trust issues. I would always move from school to school and would sometimes transfer from 2 different schools a school year. I dealt with this by becoming very social and talkative so i could easily make friends. But after 7th grade i realised that everything never really mattered. I could make all the friends i wanted but i could never keep em. I became a delinquent. It started with me going from a A and B student to not even doing homework and trying on the tests. It gradually got worse and worse. I started ditching and cutting school 8th grade. When freshman year came up i was getting into fights and being suspended. I kept this act until junior year of highschool and figured out i wasnt going to get anywhere in my life. I was already in the system by this time. By senior year i decided i caught up on all my missing credits for highschool and decided to join the military. I dont have any contact with my dad or brother. I dont have any real friends but just people from high school that never text me first. I find out that i always have to be the one to start the conversation. When i join the army, i'm going to be in the infantry. I hope i die out there being blown up or shot. That way i'll truly feel like i lived and died for something.

Thanks man, i really hope so. I've been in a similar situation where a chick didnt want to come off as a slut. Just sucks that it was blown out of proportion like it did.

>not the way I thought it was going to go or end
>not mad I read it

thanks bro, a few questions though
>why were they laughing at you?it doesn't seem that funny that someone would be asleep and I laught at fart jokes.
>doesn't it seem a bit more weird that the bus driver took you to his parents house? no matter what language he speaks wouldn't he just take you to the damn wall? everytime I've been on a tour group like that all the drivers have taken 500-1,000 groups to look at 1 of 10 things in town.
>why would you talk to zach again? he is obviously a dick to you, why bother?

do you have any where you jizz on someone's face (or someone else on yours) and get caught right after and are forced to divulge an inconvenient truth?

pic semi-related, it's the toolman

you should kill Zach

America is the country of great possibilities yet?

Another Jew here. What denomination? What shuul?
Anyways, story time. I feel like spinning a yarn. Here's some setup or something.
>Be me
>Little beta faggot at 11
>Like most little Jewboys, start going to camp aroung this age
>Alas, no, it was not anything remotely similar to Auschwitz, although by this point in my life I'm wishing there was.
>About a month long sleepaway during the summer
>Got coerced into going by some friends who went for a shorter session the year before and liked it
>I didn't go cuz I was a little shit who didn't wanna give up his PS2 (no electronics at camp)
>Well anyways, I go this year
>It's fucking fantastic. I get super active, one of my counselors is this sex god from Israel (six foot two, ripped, bronzed, huge beard, looked like Zeus Rosen) and he gets us eating really healthy so we all turn into stronk little 11 year olds (me and my cabin of like 10 other kids plus two other counselors)(no sex was had with any of them, sorry you shota loving fags)
>Meet a ton of cool people, both in my bunk and out, have a bunch of really fun activities all the time, was never bored, it was great. Jews don't pretend to know what happens when you die, but I sure as hell hope heaven is just Jewish summer camp forever, it was that awesome.
>Go home, have one week 'til school starts
>Pass this week biking around the neighborhood, playing Pokemon and Bully (parents didn't care), and generally being sedentary
>School starts
>I'm a fucking idiot and nearly get suspended for some dumb shit, apparently some parent thought I was gonna shoot up the school up cuz there'd been a shooting nearby a year ago.
>Get alienated to fuck
>No friends, go through all of sixth grade alone with my games and friends from camp and shuul who lived nearby, so basically like two guys
Conting whether you fags like it or not, I'm drunk, high, and don't give a shit. Also AMA when I'm done.

roll for more

I genuinely think i'm nearing the end. I was abused by mother, a stranger forced me to suck them off and forced themselves in me, my mother committed suicide a while back. My father is the only reason i havent killed myself yet. he cares about me and wants me to be happy but im so fucked up i cant do normal everyday shit without falling apart. i'm so fucked up i just dont think i can function in society and ultimately for my sake it would be best to kill myself as soon as possible just to end the endless unhappiness and sadness i feel. but i also know that it would break my fathers heart to have to bury me. so for now im living for him working and going to therapy and trying to "fix myself"

but i dont think thats going to happen and i dont know what im going to do once he's gone.

TL;DR im a huge fucking pussy

>Start puberty early and get a really deep voice and acne when I'm fucking twelve (I got picked on like hell because I hadn't hit any growth spurts, but at least I could bust nuts)
>During the last few months of school my parents start fighting, I didn't know it because they were quiet about it but apparently my mom fucked some dude
>I start getting really stressed out because my dad was more orthodox-conservative and wanted me to have a conservative Bar Mitzvah, so I'm doing school (I went to a charter school cuz fuck southern education systems) homework plus training for a Bar Mitzvah plus getting bullied like shit in school plus my parents might get a divorce
>As you can imagine, this does wonders for my mental health.
>Leads to some issues we'll get too later.
>Anyways, school ends, a new kid moves to the city and onto my street, get to be pretty good friends with him. His name's Aaron and he's also going to camp along with me and the other 3 friends
>Apparently I'm going from special snowflake school A to special snowflake school B, so that's nice
>I'm also going to camp again
>Shit's looking good
>Then my mom fucks another guy and my parents start openly fighting
>This is great, I hate my dad because he's a religious cunt, and now my mom who I liked is turning abusive
>Camp starts
>Had the same cabin plus Aaron, I now have 11 brothers in arms, partners in crime, compadres, comrades, closest of friends.
>No parents fighting, no school, no Bar Mitzvah prep
>Just endless days spent eating good food, playing in the sun and chilling in the lake or pool
>It's fucking wonderful
>I get super fit again, which is nice cuz I was always a borderline fat fuck.
>Life's good
>Camp ends
>I go home, spend the last week being sedentary again, basically avoiding my parents fighting and playing as much vidya as I can
Conting whether you like it or not, tell me what you're enjoying or if you're not

>parents fighting

are they still together?

Lol singles, don't worry tho
>School starts again
>Fuckingwonderful.jpeg
>Dad is making me do a sport
>Hellyeahevenmoreshittoworryabout.gif
>Pick swim, swim is great, full body workout and gains like hell
>School still sucks, turn thirteen that year and start to really develop mental issues
>Anxiety disorder, panic attacks
>Early symptoms of depression, get a bit edgy but keep a lid on it (mostly, did have one incident where I wore a fedora for about a month, god I regret that, also I was 13 and in 7th grade)
>Still alienated by school friends but Aaron also goes to my school now, and because he's more of a loner type me and him become close friends and don't really associate with anyone else but the three dudes from Jew Church, Ron, Jon(athan), and Alex.
>Parents still fighting, it's not getting any better
>Basically spending my time at Aarons house, playing vidya and noticing that girls are a thing.
>Usually hang out with the komrades from shuul once a week, rest of my time is either homework, getting forced to stay home by my dad to practice hebrew with him while he fends off sharp comments from my mother
>Bar Mitzvah comes in december. Around this time, I realize suicide is an option
>Have a massive panic attack night before Bar Mitzvah, think long and hard about an heroing.
>Don't
>Bar Mitzvah comes and goes, get a shitton of money, party is me and my friends running around town on our bikes doing thirteen-year-olds-on-bikes things and then going over to my house to play vidya until about 2, when we all passed out
>Removal of Bar Mitzvah stress is nice
>I start going from getting C's and D's in school to C's and B's which is nice
>Start getting okay at swim
>Still bullied at school, but less. Start to make a couple more "friends" (people I talked too)
>Life's looking up
>Parents are still fighting but I'm still managing
>School ends
>HYPEHYPEHYPEHYPE.exe
Are y'all gonna bump the thread or is my writing really that bad

Your writing isn't bad user, I would consider it good!

Everything about you is a series of reactions in your brain, once that's gone, you cease to exist. Your consciousness, feelings and memories are no more.

>fends off sharp comments from my mother

so she cheated more than once and still talked shit to your dad? was he unemployed or something?

agreed, writing not bad. keep going.

lol nope
>Camp
>First day, that thing that happens in movies happens
>I see her
>Y'know, the one with the perfect hair and the perfect eyes and smile and body and holy shit she's in a Shadow of the Colossus shirt I didn't even know those existed
>Don't talk to her for the first week because I'm still a beta shit, but then me and the "old guard" as we monikered ourselves started to do our thing
>Get abs and a tan again, acne fades because my grandma sent me meds for it (basically all she does in this story), and get into the swing of things
>Camp is pretty small, around 900 people including all staff. I know about 450 of 'em.
>Love them all, they all love me. I'm not even a super alpha, friends with everyone type, that's just the way shit is at camp
>Eventually, girl who's pretty much my sister but lives a state away from me and with whom I only interact with at camp sets me up with Leah as a "Shabbatie Hottie"
>Basically, we spend Shabbat (the day of rest, prayer, charity, etc in the week. When God rested from creating the world in the Torah), which means 4 hours of free time over the entire camp (from the ropes course to the kitchen for cooking classes to the lake), then a nice(r) dinner, then services on a rise over a lake with a fucking perfect view of the sunset, then dancing for hours, then sitting around a campfire and singing old Leonard Cohen songs and Lean on Me and stuff like that
>Shabbat's great
>Leah and I meet up at the start, and after awkwardly talking for about 2 minutes about what we want to do, I make some spergy reference to Shadow of the Colossus
>This sparks a 10 hour long talk that lasted through all of freetime (the good ol' walk and talk my bois. Works every time), dinner, services, dancing, and only pauses to sing songs we like at the campfire
>Men, I did not know love then, but I was as close as a 13 year old could be then
Thanks for the support y'all

men killed it for me
good thing the weeb meem music I'm listening too killed it before the men

my gf dumped me because she doesn't want kids ever (she has valid reasons) but I want them. I thought I would marry this girl, she's beautiful and talented and we were great for each other. but now, the first girl I've loved in almost a decade has left me, I have no other prospects in this shit city, and I'm too introverted to meet new people. I'll be 26 in a month as all my friends are getting married and popping out kids like crazy. I have been depressed all night. I'm also taking a break from smoking weed, which is probably compounding my shit mood, but I smoke too much and it is hurting my productivity and I feel like I need to cut back. I just feel worthless and alone tonight

Nope, she was just a fucking bitch, and he was sorta a sperg
Shoulda said Sup Forumsros, but I'm drunk and forgot I'm a faggot
>I get back to the cabin and I cannot contain myself
>Get insulted at camp for the first time for being a fucking loudmouth about a chick and 12:30 at night
Also I feel like I should clarify that the counselors at camp were pretty much older brothers, not counselors. Also forgot to mention discussion went everywhere
>Next day
>Keep talking to Leah, find out she lives a few miles away, but goes to a different Shuul, the reform one (the liberal one. Conservatives live up to their political namesake and the orthodoxy are the ones you'd suspect of running the world)
>FUCKYES.fuckyes
>Basically the rest of camp goes like this for me whenever I'm with her, and when I'm not because of different activities it was the same bliss it always is at camp.
>Camp ends
>Spend the week before school with Leah at her house mostly, her parents were super cool, playing vidya and talking.
>I'm still a bit of a beta fag so it takes me two years to realize she's into me too, more on that later
>Life continues pretty much the same, about 5/10 on the bullying scale, but my Jew friends make it bearable
>Leah and I slowly become closer, Aaron somehow picks up a chick from school (dude actually had autism, was a total weeb but I still liked him), so me and him sort of drift apart, but at the level we were at it means going from hanging out pretty much whenever we weren't doing homework or sports to three or four times a week.
>Because I'm spending 80% of my time out of the house, I don't really realize when the fighting gets worse
>When the fighting gets physical sometimes
>Ah, bliss.
>Anyways
>Eighth grade ends with my mom picking me up with a strange dude in the car.
>I don't mention anything to my dad because I'm smart and know it'll make life worse
>I get dropped off and my mom leaves

youtube.com/watch?v=fmO1u3ONYg8

Hope things get better user :(

tried to drink myself to death last night.
i came home for the first time in months to see my friends and got mega depressed. downed almost a liter of Jack before I realized they'd just take me to the hospital and pump my stomach. told my friends I don't remember drinking that much. feels bad

Talk to us, what's wrong? What pushed you to the edge to drink yourself to death?

I'm going to keep reading but this better not be one of those deals where Leah ends up being your own mother who fell through a timewarp to come on to you.

actual lol