How did Sup Forums lose it's virginity?

How did Sup Forums lose it's virginity?

first time i got drunk, i tried e , got laid. Never put the bottle down since.

dumb question
>still a virgin

escort/hooker 3 years ago. pic related.

I was 18, she was 16. Both virgins, and it was incredibly unspectacular. I was so nervous I couldn;t stay hard, and a pit-bull terrier kept snipping my arse which didn't help the situation.
Still, I came, but she didn't. Couldn;t do it again as we were at her parents so waited til the following weekend where we had more time and fucked like rabbits for 2 days

*sniffing

>implying

> be me when 15 yo
> messing around with a fat pig
> her: "let's get nake and mess around"
> me: "okay, but no insertion"
> immediately hop on her and accidentally impale her
> pull out
> immediately cum all over her
> get dressed
> throw the cum/blood covered comforter into the wash before my parents get home

Well, there goes our virginity. Fuck.

a cute girl came to me at the club, the second sentence she said to me was "do you wanna sleep at my place tonight"
true story, ask me anything

I got assfucked by a dog when I was 12.

I was 16, slept with 15 y/o step sister.

Super gay story but

>be 16, 9 years ago
>read Cather in the Rye by moonlight on the roof of my house
>Same night Obama elected into office first time
>girl I was in love with wanted to hang
>she knew I was virgin fag
>thought it'd be fun to take virginity
>fuck in driver seat of my 1985 grand prix
>maybe 10 minutes in
>mom calls 5 times
>love of my life says I need to answer
>stop having sex to answer
>mom screaming telling me to come home
>sex doesn't resume
>go home

2 years later we had a kid. She's married with 3 other kids now. Super great mother, and we get along very well. Don't even have court set up. Pay child support monthly, whatever she asks for (still keep records of it just in case). Awesome coparents. Step dad is pretty cool too.

In a horse barn.

Trips.

Also, Catcher*

>Back in '68
>Our eyes met
across the crowded hat store.
> I, a customer, and she a coquettish haberdasher.
> I pursued and she withdrew, then she pursued and I withdrew, and so we
danced.
> Came in 15 seconds. The end.

CONT'D
> be me, 18 now. basically still a virgin.
> girlfriend hops on top of me and gets me hard.
> put on a condom, stick it in, cum immediately
> make her stop, she gives me another condom
> start fucking her. cum almost immediately again.
> can't stay hard.
> FUCK.

Been married to her for 22 years.

Awkwardly.

I lose my virginity by having sex

my moms friend tried to fonger me in the back of my moms car

This is a "how did you have your first time" thread, not a "how did you get emotionally scarred" or a "how did you almost have your first time" thread

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Still a bad premature ejaculator and she's charged on you, right?

Cheated*

I like your style

Mama's boy cuckface detected.

*its

same here

Its time to kill yourself.

He seems to have his life together and your response is
>Mama's boy cuckface detected
You must have a really shit life.

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I never loose anything.
My virginity is still here, intact, perfect, brand new.

You had sex with the same hooker three years ago?

Dad's buddy's daughter.

>not allowed to date
>super religious
>I'm 17, she's 19
>Still flirt for a year
>sneak a kiss July 4th
>make out in secret
>my familiy is getting ready to leave the state
>she sneaks out to horse barn 2 weeks before we leave
>lots of oral, no sex
>two more times, oral, fondling, fingerings
>a week before we leave, she sneaks out, lots of foreplay, she gets on top
>Feel Captain Winky peer into the Cave of Wonder
>let her know that if she wants to stay a virgin, we'd have to change position
>she thinks about it, and sits down
>we'd both already cum at least once
>sex for 10 or 20 minutes
>nocondom.webm
>all my load
>all week later we elope
>tomorrow is the 15 year anniversary of that day

Been married ever since.

Was 16, she was 14. Went over to her house early in the morning during xmas break. Boned for a long time. Condom broke and kept banging. No regrets

...

three and half years ago

>be me
>14 years old
>She was 15
>She texts me asking if I've ever had sex
>I say no
>She wants to show me what is like
>I walked 2 miles at like 4 in the fucking morning
>Have sex with her. She's mostly on top.

It was a pretty good night, I guess. She's a dyke lesbian now but her girlfriend is pretty fucking hot.

Lurk moar fag.

17, dating 14 year old, been dating for a year and a half at that point. Fucked in her room while watching super bad, she came I didn't, tried to jack me off, didn't work. Ended up making myself cum, pretty disappointing overall.

Guest bedroom at my girlfriend's mom's house. I was 17, she was 16. We were watching Monty Python's Holy Grail and I ended up fucking her butt 3 times. We were roleplaying so I was talking with a French accent.

First time I fucked puss it was on the couch at the same girlfriend's mom's house. Nearly a year later so I was 18 and she was 17. Same deal: French accent.

Pic related.

At a birthday party, a drunk bitch broke up with his boyfriend and wanted to piss him off so me, a shy young-looking guy, seemed like a good bait for her and I had a chance to bang her (while being caught on act by some mutual friends). Though everything about it was a total failure, I was totally drunk by this time, and there wasn't any happy ending, it gave me some confidence to carry on and continue that shitty life.

Her ass has a French accent?

Touched a nerve, huh?

Fucked a girl named Jennifer on the floor of my high school auditorium.

...

.

I was 21, we were kissing in a couch, got naked, got nervous so my dick was semi hard, managed to pull in, last like 30 seconds and cum inside, had to buy a post day

Only when she farts.

please prove it to me. what tattoo did she have on her hand?

did it with my high school crush. it is the only time in my life i ever did it with someone i had a crush on, it is a memory i cherish in my heart. during all my 20s i went through an endless streak of rejection. now i'm 32 and i'm with someone i feel meh about, but hey, at least i got someone.

fuck, at least i got to lose my virginity with someone i had a massive crush on

was getting close to giving up after I turned 20 and was just gonna hire a hooker. Then, last friday, at a party I was at, me and this amazingly gorgeous girl who was a weight lifter with massive thigh's that also happened to be one of my greatest friends decided to be my drinking buddy. by the end of the night we had fucked and fell asleep holding hands.

completely ruined our friendship, and if I could go back I would have never done it.

it was in my house at the age of 19, had lots of stuf always but never got laid
met her in the army been togther she cheated on me been a fuckboy ever since

>In 11th grade
>threw a party because my parents were gone for the weekend.
>ended up getting out of hand with over 100 people showing up.
>A girl called Elle decided to have sex with a senior named Seton in my room.
>Since it was her first time
>she bled everywhere. All over people’s bags, some of my clothes that were on the floor, my bed and the floor.
>Feeling embarrassed, she tried to clean it up with a bottle of spray bleach she found in my bathroom. >She ended up bleaching my carpet and bed sheets.
>Passed out covered in her own blood and bleach.

>fucking her butt
>French accent
BE OUR GUEST BE OUR GUEST LET ME CUM UPON THOSE BREASTS

>26 years old
>so alone that i try to do random things in hope that it will spark some change.
>today i'm eating ice cream in a park.
>i could relax in public at this point because nothing even mattress.
>a girl walks up, like a solid 8
>really quirky and cute.
>she asks for a taste of my ice cream.
>we hit it off, we like some of the same cartoons and candy and stuff. just petty things.
>at this point in my life i just gave up on getting laid and figured that if i stopped pathetically trying i might get some somehow.
>I asked her if she wanted to come to my house to play wii. it just came out.
>so she comes over and we are playing wii sports.
>she asks where the bathroom is. I show her, but she doesnt close the door all the way.
>i couldnt help but look
>she catches me and when she is done, she says that she will show me hers if i show her mine.
>kinda childish, but i suites her somehow.
>i whip it out and she drops her panties
>we get all touchy and then i bring her to my bed
>we kiss and stuff, then i stick it in.
>really tight.
>i blow my load in like 15 pumps
>after a little bit we go back to playing wii.
>i asked her if she wanted to stay the night, but she couldnt.
>she was starting 4th grade the next day.

>English is not my first langauge.jpg

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MORTS MORTS MORTS MOOTS MORTS MOOTS

Delete this post or ill call them!

Some people said my father was a weirdo after the court case was finished with, but i say he was an excellent father and a excellent kisser.

sword with a thorn wrapped around it

drunk in college. found out later she was a complete slut and fucks all the time. got so lucky I didn't catch anything from not using a condom.

Thinking of doing the same honestly.