Fortune time with your host osaka
The rules
>fortunes might take some time to make
>reminder that this is a fortune thread not a wafiu thread
>i have the right to refuse service to anyone
>one fortune per user
>fortunes may range from decent to absolute shit
>discussion is accepted
>any bad fortunes that you get will happen to you
>last but not least remember that my fortunes come with risks that include, thoughts of suicide, limb loss, rape, retardation, death, and becoming a huge faggot
Wow today was also a bad day to make fortunes
Whats my fortune osaka
God bless you user
>your fortune says all the uncertainties in your life will go away once you die
Well thats certainly an interesting fortune
fortune plz
gib fortun pls
I try to make them enjoyable for everyone but there are times when noting good comes up at all.
Robbie my boy how are you?
>your fortune says you will morph into the biggest tumor the world has ever seen
Fortune pls
Ive had a rough day Osaka, what be my fortune
>your fortune says false hope will help you live longer but the pain of knowing its false will fuck you up more.
>your fortune says a new virus will infect your computer for all the scat porn you saw
How rough was it?
>your fortune says have a drink but don't drink too much or else you will end up like pic you posted
Lol I'm not into scat, last two were xtrmely accurate tho
Which two fortunes?
Well Osaka, hit me with it.
Could I get a ummm fortune please
YO let's get me a fortune over here
I'll have a fortune, please.
what do you use for fortunes
I'm about to go to bed; I might as well get a fortune first.
I feel sad now but many thank for give of fortun
I'd like a fortune, please.
Give it to me senpai.
So do you hate emoticons? lol
Wario I shitposted you one time
>your fortune says osaka will slap you hard
Sure homer
>your fortune says you will forget my existence in a few minutes
Aight nig
>your fortune says rap your way up top to become some other rappers bitch
I use chopsticks user
>your fortune says the other fortune tellers with crucify you for believing in me
Night user have a good sleep
>your fortune says your dog will rape you in your sleep
Dont feel sad lets talk some more
Here you are user
>your fortune says a pink chicken will lay a egg on your computer giving it true anonymity but the catch is that your retarded
*slaps you with fortunes*
>your fortune says you have awaken a terrible habit
No not really
>your fortune says post some anime emoticons and get flipped off by another user
Awww yeah homie knows what's crackin! WE OUT
Sorry I missed you there user
>your fortune says sneek away from the masses
Peace son
But you told me a few days ago wtf are those emoticons you retards
>your fortune says you have awaken a terrible habit
Started smoking to deal with social anxiety, fortan on point.
Did I say that user I don't remember?
Isn't there another way to deal with your anxiety, What do you like to do other than smoke?
Osaka-chan! Osaka-chan! What is my fortune for this weekend?!
I'm gonna be playing a children's trading card game!
Sounds fun I guess why tell me this?
>your fortune says cheat your way to victory and become number one
Because I'm hoping for something good! And not to be, like, dismembered or anything.
Yea you did
Please gimme some fortune
Fortune?
Fortune me up bb
Don't worry that won't happen to you user anyway who are you going to play with?
Well sorry I guess that might had been another osaka or I just have shit memory
Cardcaptor sakura was a good show
>your fortune says you will be dismember horribly by eil Roth
Sure also nice image
>your fortune says you will flip off a blind person just because you want to see there reaction
Why call me bb?
>your fortune says its not good to spy on other messages
fortune please
I'm heading to a regional, so probably a lot of strangers, for several hours.
It'll be fun. I'm heading down with some pals from our local group.
>your fortune says the quality of things lowers over time
What group your in user?
Its sounds fun
Eli Roth? Who dat?
Just a few of the other players at our local card shop, and by extension, our city.
Some guy that makes torture movies like saw
Where are they going to be hosting the event?
Someplace in Atlanta. Last time I attended one, there were nearly 300 players.
anything else
Im in California so alanta is farrr awaay from me, what got you in cards anyway
It's yugioh. Pretty much got into it by watching the Tv show like everyone else, then dropped it.
Then found some friends who liked it, played for a while, then dropped it again.
Then found another interest in it, and now I'm playing again.
Okay since you asked that basically applies to everything in the universe and your body as well.
That's how I am so no shame in that I guess.
I think it's fun.
Osaka, will I win the MegaMillions lottery's jackpot before my current ticket expires?
Fortune me
wtb fortune
My life has been filled with despair. What fortune does my favorite girl hold for me?
where's my fucking fortune
Good for you enjoying the things you like with out fear of looking like a geek
No even statistics goes against that probability
>your fortune says spend your money on things that will be guarantee of use
>your fortune says your teeth will feel a sharp pain as I drill on your cavities
>your fortune says fuck a pie to get notice here
Thank you for being nice user
>your fortune says stop wanting to feel like shit so you can do something about it
Chill user I got one here just for you
>your fortune says break the table if you want to fight so much
It's okay to look like a geek. I'm not too worried, or maybe I forgot how to properly worry.
Or is that just growing up? I'm having fun, and that's what counts.
Im paranoid most of the time so I don't know how that feels but im glad your going to have fun
Tell me my fortune pl0x
Fortune Now plz
Nothing to be ashamed of, fear gets the better of us all.
I've been around enough that I still see people being pretty shy, whether around events like these, or just interacting with strangers.
Like this 12-something-year-old selling a coupon book as part of some September school fundraising event. I thought I'd throw him a bone and bought one-it actually looks pretty neat.
Hit me with a fortune before I go to sleep please.
>your fortune says your hair will keep you warm for winter
>your fortune says you will die by a papercut that got infected
I don't play cards at all user but that was a nice thing to do for him
Sure
>your fortune says it better to handle the issue than avoding it
i may not be the first user to fuck a pie, but i sure won't be the last
as you command genie
Fortune ploxx
Thank you user post results for me please
>your fortune says you will speak in broken english for three hours long on saturday
Bump
Why aren't you sleeping
Do I get a cookie with my fortune?
Because I don't feel like it also its still 10:39 where im at
Sure alice
>your fortune says you will get the biggest cookie I can summon
Please tell me you're a master wizard
*drops a twenty on your floor*
Maybe I am what is your favorite cookie to eat?
Thanks, Osaka! I've already come up with a to-do list in that scenario.
Are you the depressed user? And no problem
Gotta be a soft-ish serve Vanilla cookie with Reese's peanut butter chips
I don't like reese's very much but I love the root beer cookie that chips ahoy had
...They had what? How have I not heard of this?!
I remember them realising it around 2011 but I think they still have it today
Now I've gotta go on an adventure sometime soon to find me a box...
Here's how they look like and it will be worth it
Osaka
You have no idea how delicious that sounds right now, I'm so baked and I'm starting to get the muchies yo, these will be my white castle.
had em, confirmed for tasty - taste like shit if youve already had enough sugar though
Don't get to lost now and get some jack in the box as well
Sadly we don't have a Jack in the Box anywhere near where I live or the neighboring towns... I also basically live back in the woods so that's entirely possible.
Don't eat alot anymore but I still would eat them everyday if I felt like it
Call someone to grab it for you then don't want the cougers to get you
A fortune would be cool
No worries, I'm always packin' a pistol at the very least, besides it's not an adventure if I don't go do it myself and you just know they won't taste as good if I don't
Osaka-chan, what's my fortune?
yoooo
fortune pls~!!
I'm gonna get a tattoo of you Osaka, under my armpit, the pose like in the opening of the series, when all the girls jump!
>your fortune says being cool is cool because its cool get it?
Post result when you get there okay Alice
Nice leg
>your fortune says you will lose the other leg in to match your style
Cool
>your fortune says good luck and dreams will bless you for a year
Hello, fortune user.
I only have one question.
Will I ever have the friends I ever longed for?
Thanks in advance, in case you do reply.
>>your fortune says good luck and dreams will bless you for a year
I broke a mirror just 3-4 years ago...but if you say so,COOL
What do you seek in a friend also I can be your if you want?
>your fortune says know who your talking to to improve the succes of your conversation
Yeah it overrides it
Osaka, can I get a fortune, too? Pic unrelated
>your fortune says its alway good to take precautions
>What do you seek in a friend
I always wanted something like the sidekick they sometimes show in tv series. But not the tipical one, but rather like that one that's with the outcasts but is a total bro or sis, and will support you no matter what. I know it sounds pathetic, but it's the truth.
>also I can be your if you want?
Sounds awesome. I'd like that a lot.
Oh like sakura brother from cardcaptor sakura also give me your discord if you have one
thinking of changing my course in life, as I hate my job, want to go to school, and am quite lonely after my fiance/gf of 5 years split 3 years ago.
RIGGED FORTUNE
kek
Will i get a gf?
Hiadgbwkef#1456
Thank you.