As you grow older you hate your parents more and more for what they did to you

>as you grow older you hate your parents more and more for what they did to you.
What is this hell?

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as you grow into your early twenties, you mean.

as you get older, you understand the burden they shouldered, trying to bring you up without having you walk in front of a truck or swallow a button or something.

Interesting insight.

What did they do to you? I had a kid, now I feel sorry for what I put my parents through.

Realized after starting to get involved with drugs that they were high almost every single moment of my childhood which is super disappointing. Going straight after all of this, I didn't deserve that and no one else does if they are sober around me.

Ruined my education to make sure I could go to summer school so I wasn't around so that could get high. I don't blame them, having a child was probably not a good idea for them.

The one thing I don't forgive them for is ruining my education and making sure I was behind. I fucking hate them for that. Also I'll stop crying and fuck off now. This shits gay. They weren't together enough to have children.

Pls don't

Ah, fair enough. If you have kods make sure you break the cycle. I thought you might have been whining about how they didn't get you the newest iPhone or something. My mistake

yeah until you're like 20

Thank for being cool my dude and not saying that was gay af. That would have made my shit worse

>for what they did to you
...you mean give you ability to exist and complain about them to strangers on the internet?

I didn't ask to breathe.

If you weren't born you couldn't ask for anything... or even be aware of the concept of asking or breathing.

That's okay. Thanks

You don't really realize how fucked you are until you become an adult and have to face everything that's holding you back from being a functional person and how you came to be that way.

I wish I was one of those perfect, "Nothing-bad-has-every-happened-to-me" White middle class people with perfect parents...

But I wasn't... and I have to work twice as hard just to do what other people do so easily...


I know how you feel OP

This couldn't be more accurate. I wonder what it is like living the life of one of those guys.

That breaks my heart to hear user. I hope that one day your wounds will truly heal.
Short bio, growing up, it would always feel as though I was being severely neglected, or strictly monitored. My folks were religious so if their favorite trick, emotional guilt, wasn't being effective , they had no trouble resorting to physical punishments and violence. My father's dad though was a real piece of work. Cattle farmer alcoholic who beat my father much harsher than anything I received. My dad and I never agreed much or seen eye to eye but he tried his best to make sure I turned out proper. And if I ever have children someday, there's going to be certain things I will do differently to make sure the cycle of trauma is broken and the next generation will have it the easy I wish to have.

Tl;dr- it's natural to have a disconnect or even resentment for our parents. We are literally made of half the DNA of both ma and pa so you better make peace with it. The sooner you do, the sooner you can move on.
Also, talk to a psychiatrist

Damn. Thanks for that.

>We are literally made of half the DNA of both ma and pa so you better make peace with it.

That makes me so angry more than you know. Makes me wonder how I couldn't be as retarded as them. You said some good shit. Thanks dude.

As someone who's been through a lot and started life with a shitty foundation

This is one of my favorite songs
youtube.com/watch?v=nxg4C365LbQ


Maybe you can relate to it too OP

live the present user, it's never too late to start your studies.

My parents are lazy, irresponsible drug addicts. They cooked meth throughout my childhood, had me exposed to countless police encounters, raids, and state mandated relocation with relatives who were the exact same as them. We barely had food in the house, I hardly went to school, and all of the kids bullied me because it was a small town and they knew what was going on.

I'm doing okay financially, I have a great relationship and a few friends, but I'm also socially inept. I hsed college loan money to get an alartment and had to immediately learn every life skill that other 17 year okds had been taught for years.

I don't give a fuck about either of them, and I'm glad they're still miserable and poor.

this. Sure, my parents made mistakes, everyone does, especially with the first born. but holding a grudge over anything that wasn't purposely harmful is pretty damn immature.

>but holding a grudge over anything that wasn't purposely harmful is pretty damn immature.

But this is a human life we're talking about. Those "accidentally harmful mistakes" can severely impact the longterm trajectory of that child's and the degree of happiness they can hope to find.

People have kids and just ///assume/// they'd be good parents, without really being educated on what a child needs emotionally and psychologically

It's this assumption that destroys lives

It's a pretty bold statement to make, but ...
IMPERFECT PEOPLE SHOULD NOT HAVE KIDS

Just blame the Jews

> implying your parents spent time and effort to fuck you up
They're just people, doing what they thought was appropriate/the best choice. Have a different opinion, go raise your kids differently than they did. Show'em there is another way.

>IMPERFECT PEOPLE SHOULD NOT HAVE KIDS
soooo, we should just let the human race end then?

I'm totally in favor of a parenting license and revoking the 'right' to unlimited reproduction.
Also, social services should check out the home environment, before the kid is born. Instead of taking it into foster care afterwards.

There are far too many on this earth suffering, because they're the result of emotionally-unintelligent, inept, apathetic parents.

If a smaller population means, that only people who are certain to give a child the strongest fighting chance a child can get to be a healthy, functional, happy human

Then so be it.
That sounds like a much better world to me

You're absolutely right, sadly
> muh kids
> muh reproductive freedom
> muh freedom to raise kids the way I want
> no organized effort to teach adults how to raise children
> my kid is my friend
> my kid should be able to get anything he wants and be anyone he wants to be

well then follow your own advice and neck yourself.
you're clearly too maladjusted for this world.

>blames his parents for not doing his homework
typical americuck

We're gonna have designer babies soon; designer babies turn into designer parents.

Everyone will be GMO soon, it's the future.

>my parents ruined MY education
whatever you tell yourself buddy

given that people have the right what they want with their body, is it still wrong to think that people that have kids these days are being selfish? putting overpopulation issues aside (which contribute to the rapid decline of resources), i think bringing a human being into this world is such a big deal that needs to be thought about very, very carefully. are your finances in check? are you emotionally ready? etc. it's fucked, too, because women are conditioned by society to believe that there is something wrong with them if they aren't married/have kids by a certain age. like, giving birth is a rite of passage to being a woman or something.

i'm 90% certain I won't be having kids. I have my reasons, but one of the main important ones is that I am cognizant that I simply don't have what it takes to be a good parent.

>People have kids and just ///assume/// they'd be good parents
There is no accurate way to simulate raising a child. While of course some level of knowledge is needed, you can never really tell how good a parent someone would be until they are one.

>you can never really tell how good a parent someone would be until they are one.

Yeah I don't know about that ...
There are key things that make or break being a good parent, which absence or presence of is a pretty good tell ...

Like
Emotional intelligence
Being financially comfortable
Patience
Empathy

Ect...

>I have my reasons, but one of the main important ones is that I am cognizant that I simply don't have what it takes to be a good parent.

Not enough people are honest with themselves about this.
Kudos to you for being self aware enough to spare what could be a lifetime of suffering from someone

You're better than a lot of people in that regard

Why do you think people cannot personally attack themselves. Why is that such a bad trait to everyone?

they made him do his homework before they'd let him play xbox or he didn't get any chicken tendies? who knows.

MOM GET ME A PEPSI
BUT SHE WOULDN'T GET ME ONE
ALL I WANTED WAS A PEPSI

how did they ruin your education? did they teach you words that were deliberately misspelled?

you can stop any time you want.

People have this idea of who they are and who they want to be.

They're so hell-bent on maintaining this idea of themselves, that they're pretty much blind to everything that contradicts it.

They don't wanna go there and they won't.
Much to the detriment of other people and people who haven't even become people yet. (in the case of potential children)

i'm totally in favor of a six year government sponsored university level course in parenting before they untie your tubes and let you have one. if you don't pass, you don't get a kid.

Admitting an error, incapability or a need for assistance is for many people akin to defeat.
They'd rather do a shitty job alone, than a good one, having to rely on friends and family.
Individualism also led to a 'there is no right way to do x' attitude, leaving the door open for idiots to argue 'yeah well, i'm going to raise my kids however I want'.
Also, the social upbringing is being shifted from parents to schools, who should not have to teach children how to behave.

One of the things that apparently made nazi germany so bad, was that the state basically raised the children, leaving the parents somewhat out of the process.
Horrible, they take away your child and teach them all kinds of bullshit.
Nowadays people are begging for the state or private kindergartens/schools to raise their children, go figure.

I'm more in favor of reversible vasectomies, but you're right, there should be some kind of condition for having children.

Just because someone is impatient or apathetic doesn't mean that they will be with their child, or maybe the act of raising a child would make them more patient or empathetic.

Also regarding financially comfortable, that is very subjective.

People shouldn't have children based on maybes

Only the iron clad, absolute certain to be good parents, should have kids is what I'm saying.


Yeah, maybe it's not true that you can fully and completely discern that before they even become parents

But it's a lot easier to predict than you're making it out to be

Poor poor wagey

The mere notion of an autocratic government raising the youth is enough to turn my stomach.
Whether you do an objectively good or bad job raising your children is simply a risk that every parent must take upon their shoulders.
There is no quantifiable way of reducing a person's experience as a parent to a basic moral good or bad. That's an extremely narrow perspective.
There will never be a world where all parents are great. While I do not argue that the prevalence of childhood abuse, domestic violence, and lacking social education should be prevented by the state, a large part of the end result is determined by the individual himself. You can't just blame parents alone for fucking up, their children are free and conscious individuals from the age of 16 and make their own decisions from that point onward.