I'm God and will grant your wish

I'm God and will grant your wish,
on condition,
when you post it.

Grant me infinite wishes

this is my wish, God

get me back into the military

i want to win damn much money so i will never have to work

OK, but you have to use one of them to wish that I can grant wishes.
Furthermore, you have to also wish that this were possible.

I want a Mazda Miata. Pls gib me.

the condition is that you are forced to be an ethical and charitable person

asking for a fuckton of money in my account will get me arrested
so can u pls get me a nice comfy part time job for this year? gotta support myself while I study

i want to die

the condition is that you can never drive it, or be inside it.

For a happy life

the condition is that she is 26 years old
the condition is that you give up and abstain from violence in every way

I want Hillary to fall in love with me and have lots of sex with me.

gib me the dildo!!!!!!

so she's a 26 year old but with a loli body?
i guess i can't complain its better than nothing

the condition is that you didn't consider working there previously
the condition is that you will be completely happy when you die. You can always say no to this wish.
the condition is that you let go of all things which cause you unhappiness, and always strive to better yourself and those around you

the condition is that you become blind.
the condition is that you only ever want to use it orally

a further condition: you are completely, and eternally faithful. If you refuse this condition, it will not happen, instantaneously.

i dont think thats going to be a problem. i dont think there would be any other human being whose panties i'd want to dive into or who would want me diving into their panties

deal. unconventional work is more interesting

Make me 400lbs

give me infinite wishes

...

I wish I wasn't such a failure

Omnipotence pls

I want to get challenger this season. I'm tired of being hard stuck in diamond.

Help me Make my life better

I want to marry a sane and smoking hot Ginger woman. Please make happen.

the condition is that you become able to change the shape of your body
the condition is that you can only ever wish for one thing, but that this wish is infinitely powerful. You can change your wish once.

Please let me lose my virginity god,if not that then please let a decent sum of money come my way

i wish to win the euromillion the next time and so, become very rich and won't have a fucking money problem in my entire life

I want to be immortal

I wish my penis was 1 inch shorter.

Just enough money to live a comfortable life

Sure !!! I'll be 600lbs haha

God I wanna be happy plis

the condition is that you love yourself despite your failures
the condition is that you're still you, and can never become or absorb anyone else.
the condition is that you quit league forever once you get there.
the condition is that you work endlessly to better the lives of those around you
the condition is that you are eternally faithful, and that you always better yourself and others

i want OP to post nudes

Let me marry a redhead or Adeline

Ida

Omnipotence guy here. Absolute deal!

i wish for $100 to save my poor dying computer fan.

more would be nice and i'd use it to save the human race, but just the hundred will be massively appreciated.

That's the condition!? Fucking done son!

Failure guy here: deal

Let her take me back

the condition is that you learn how to be alpha
the condition is that you are virtuous, ethical, and charitable; you must also never stop helping others.
the condition is that you learn the secret first
the condition is that you are able to change the size of your penis
the condition is that you never are thankless for work, and always help others.
the condition is that you let go of every reason you're unhappy, and gain a perfect sense of logic and ethics.

I want my father to be healthy/cured

Getting challenger and being able to quit this fucking game forever? That's a deal my friend.

when tho

I agree pls make some magic give me willpower something idk just help me

virgini/money guy here,i accept the deal

cure my viscous heroin addiction

the condition is that this is the only one

I want the ability to time travel at my will, as myself.

Male Todd Murphey allergic to ravioli. Seriously he eats it every day and I'm sick of watching it.

I want to have sex with a hot virgin model/actress

the condition is that she's Adeline, and that you're eternally faithful
the condition is that you can magically make money appear, for a good cause
the condition is that you can't take her by force, or force anyone to do anything ever again
the condition is that you never take for granted your father.
the conditions are:
heroin now has the opposite effect on you.
you understand how to break addiction
you never cease helping others break their addictions

Money

I want to be happy living at home while being able to provide for those I care about.

...

the condition is that you exist within your own, separate, universe.
the condition is that it becomes your previously favorite thing to watch, for an unknown and hilarious reason
the condition is that you achieve alpha aesthetics and personality, and are a good person

Darn, I wanted a redhead. They're a gift from God.

the condition is that you only ever use it for good.
the condition is that you always put in the work required to provide for yourself and those you care about. You must also now never want for anything, because you have everything you could ever want.

Enough money to never have to worry about it again for the rest of my life.

I wish to find someone who will look past my weirdness and love and accept me for who and what I am. I don't really believe it will ever happen, I'm just kind of venting.

Heartbroken guy here I'll take the deal

the condition is that you never worry and always help others

help me find myself

the condition is that you believe: you now have a mental connection with them that will grow with your relationship to them. It is currently relatively weak, but you both are aware that it exists.

I want to always be high on marijuana.

You got a deal

the condition is that you now know what you're looking for

some paypal cash shmoney would be nice, god

the condition is that you buy a dab rig

I want to be a man

done and done sir.

thank God anons. it may take me a couple years but you will all be better for it.

the condition is that you are an ethical, good, and generous person with infinite patience

I want to die

time travel that is my wish

the condition is that you start to gain testosterone at an increased rate which you can now control. You can also control and reverse estrogen within yourself.

thanks god

I'll do it, I'll make him love me. I just need to show him that noone will ever love him more, and someday we'll move beyond sexual thrills and he'll finally let me in. He hasn't left me yet, that has to mean something.

the condition is that you want to live
the condition is that you gain God-knowledge

I wish to have a peaceful death tonight

I want a house in the hills with no neighbors. Preferably near or surrounded by water.

deal

I want a wife

I want a geass ( can issue a person a command they must follow to the end even if it results in their death )

Can you make my dick bigger? But like, not so big it makes pants uncomfortable even when I don't have a chub.

I wish for beatrice to want to be with me

the condition is that you are reborn. Starting now, you are good, kind, and ethical.
the condition is that you become social and kind, and throw many parties

I wish that all my business have great gains since this month till i die

make me god

the condition is that you love her forever and are eternally faithful
the condition is that you are one with me now
the condition is that you can control the size of your penis
the condition is that you never wish for that

I wish to have 4 hands so I can always have free hand for fapping and shit

the condition is that you put most of your profits into artificial intelligence research
the condition is that you become me

I wish to be a good lawyer

the condition is that you stop all masturbation

I want a good computer so I can play new games. I never got to experience the pc master race because I always play on low graphics with 30 fps on games after 2013