Is this the perfect turd?

Is this the perfect turd?
>thick
>firm
>shiny
>that texture
>chocolatey brown colouration

...

looks to flakey and dry, not sloppy enough.

weak

Fuck off

It's not bad. As long as it's not too runny it's a good du imo.

Literal shit-post. As in, a post about shit. So, shit-posting shit. Damn that's shitty.

Okay

It's no Andy Sixx log.

5/7

Get out fag

Yes.
Yes, this is the perfect turd.

I'm glad you agree, fellow of good taste.

...

Kill yourself

Dubs logged
Throat clogged

This one is better

It's a good one but it's a bit too wet and looks rather bumpy on the end.

Perfect if you live constipated
that shit looks like an anus recker

That's probably why the anus looks purple and haemorrhoid-ridden.
>lovely

I'm not constipated I just like the thickest loads.

Why are you so offended by big loads?

No offence here, boss?!
On the contrary, I love purple and haemorrhoid-ridden anuses pushing out big loads!

>I love purple and haemorrhoid-ridden anuses
You seem mad. Are you just bitter that you only like weak small turds?

>Is this the perfect turd?
nah this is

Too soft and greenish.

>Too soft
that's a optimal poop if you're healthy and the green just means she eats plenty of leafy veggies.
If you're passing chunky shits that look like rocks glued together then you're eating like shit

>that's a optimal poop if you're healthy and the green just means she eats plenty of leafy veggies.
Green poop looks gross though.

>If you're passing chunky shits that look like rocks glued together then you're eating like shit
Dude, it's not about my own crap, it's about what I think looks appealing coming out of a chick. I like turds to look solid with texture and a rich brown colour.