Father passed away recently, he had cancer which had caused internal bleeding...

Father passed away recently, he had cancer which had caused internal bleeding, we rush to the ER and he's conscious and somewhat responsive. Then idiot CNA steps in to do a blood draw despite the fact that father had been throwing up blood almost throughout the entire day. Family takes turns to check in on him.... I'm last to go, try assisting nurse with keeping father still so he doesn't remove needle for blood draw. He winces more than usual, I've never seen a look of pain and gargles screams for help like this before and if there is a god I pray that I never do again.

Father succumbs to cardiac arrest caused by a blown vein which clots because CNA can't do his god damned job right, tell him I love him and I'll see him again. He nods ... I'm broken Sup Forums, I was the last person to speak to him and the last person to hear his last breaths. I hate myself for not questioning the CNA, or the doctors for not doing a transfusion. I hate it all. I hate me.

Nobody gives a shit. Fuck off.

malpractice

SUE THE HOSPITAL.
I'm sorry for your loss.

Let him rest. He's not suffering anymore. At least you know he knew you loved him. Getting litigious is a possibility, but will just bring back bad memories. I believe in everyone having their time. Do as you must, but at least you got to say you loved him. I cant say the same about myself

You are me from 2009, I forgive your ignorance
Thank you
I just want nothing more to forget. We're not pursuing legal charges

Learn to greentext fag.

Please don't, it will just ruin more lives in the process. The guy already feels like a POS if hes not a psychopath. Your dad is in a higher place and can see down on the true meaning of being human and helping humanity as best as one can. Thats the only thing we can do. He'll be up there helping you out, trust me. As lucky as I have been in life, theres no doubt my deceased fam is looking out for me

No, I came here not to appeal to you, but to remind you we are mortal, and if you have the chance to make the difference and be heard, take it. Don't be like me, I hate me.

I know, I haven't been sad in years... 9-10 and I forgot what this feels like.

Sorry for your loss OP
It´s 2 AM here, sage for making me get up and go to hug my old man.

Fuck you OP, you show me that i´m still not dead inside.

That's the point, the last time I saw him was on my birthday, talking about my job with all it's benign complaints. I could have talked about how great of a time I was having with him and the family, and Instead I complained. I think I spoke to him once after that on a brief 2 minute phone call... If I knew then what I know now, I'd have walked away from my job, I'd have spent all the time I could afford to be with him, I hate myself, even though I know deep down it wasn't me, I didn't do this... I didn't speak up either, I didn't know it was going to be the last time...

Also, thank you.

My mom passed in June. It was sudden, everyone was home, except me. I was doing army shit (national guard)

I feel like shit everyone else was there and I wasn't. There is nothing I could've done. She just collapsed. My bro and dad took turns with CPR, my sister was on the phone with 911, and I was asleep with my unit less than a half hour away.

It wouldn't make a difference OP. It was his time. It was my Mom's time.

It doesn't provide any comfort, I know, because I feel like shit that I wasn't there just like you feel like shit that you were there.

I just hope you find peace OP.

I know it doesn't mean much on Sup Forums, but I'll keep you in my prayers, because really, what else can we do?

I wondered that, if I'd hate myself less for not being there. The fact that you have an answer to a question I haven't asked yet means a lot, and I sympathize with you, I'm sorry for your loss, just don't hate yourself. It hurts.

cancer is a bitch

He went into remission, he went from 180lbs to 94lbs in almost a month and a few days... It was tragic to say the least.

dude, man the fuck up, even if your dad is gone for now, he left knowing you were not his problem anymore; If you have a job you might as well be independent, wich is of a great pride for any good parent.

I´m praying to all the gods that my father does not die in 5 years on the future, i´m 24 and going to start a new career because i fucked up, because i´m a lazy fuck.

Sorry for the broken english, spanishfag here.

And again, fuck you OP, for making me write this long shit.

TL.DR., Man the fuck up fag.

And again sorry for your loss, i honestly hope you can be calm in the shitstorm.

Thanks, just do me a favor. Hug your old man, and your mom. The worst thing to do is to give up that opportunity.

done and done pal, good vibes and strength yo you and your family.

Thank you, Sup Forums is not usually the place for this, but thank all of you guys.

So fucking edgy. What's it like being a njhilistic teenager? It's been a while

You cannot be blamed for what happened OP. You're a good son and you did all that you could do for your father. He knows that. You need to honor his memory by moving forward in life and making something of yourself. He lives through you right now. Keep it legit and walk tall. Much love.

I just wish I did more. but thank you. I'll try my damnedest to do better.