The world ends today. The only way into getting into Heaven is reciting 1 bible verse. How fucked are you?

The world ends today. The only way into getting into Heaven is reciting 1 bible verse. How fucked are you?

Shit game. You should have specified that you have to quote it from your head. Your post implies there's no restrictions. So I just pull out my cell phone and google it.

What's a bible?

God said let there be light.
Chapter 1, kinda first verse.

John 3:16 faggot

Jesus wept.

>not starting with "and"

>As I walk through the valley of the shadow of death
I take a look at my life and realize there's nothin' left
‘Cause I've been blastin' and laughin' so long
That even my momma thinks that my mind is gone
But I ain't never crossed a man that didn't deserve it
Me be treated like a punk, you know that's unheard of
You better watch how you talkin' and where you walkin'
Or you and your homies might be lined in chalk
I really hate to trip, but I gotta loc
As they croak, I see myself in the pistol smoke
Fool, I'm the kinda G that little homies wanna be like
On my knees in the night, sayin' prayers in the street light

Had to memorize that shit in school. What a bunch of bs. I mean, if you believe in it fine, but having to memorize it is stupid.

"Jesus wept."

Now let me in, bitches.

How do you grow up in a first world country and not hear so much of that shit that not even a single verse sticks. FFS our society is saturated with that bullshit.

Pretty sure I can recite Leviticus 18:20

A local boy kicked me in the butt last week
I just smiled at him and I turned the other cheek
I really don't care, in fact I wish him well
'Cause I'll laughin' my head off when he's burnin' in hell
But I ain't never punched a tourist even if he deserved it
An Amish with a 'tude? You know that's unheard of
I never wear buttons but I got a cool hat
And my homies agree, I really look good in black...fool
If you come to visit, you'll be bored to tears
We haven't even paid the phone bill in 300 years
But we ain't really quaint, so please don't point and stare
We're just technologically impaired

“The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. ... And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy My brothers."

"A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed."

-Amendmentus 2:07

I can do Ezekial 25:17 from Pulp Fiction.

>The truth is Ringo, you're the weak, and I am the tyranny of evil men

jesus wept

I only remember one or two semi-verbatim

>John 3:16 For God so loved the word, he gave his only begotten son, that whosoever believith in him should not perish, but have ever lasting life.

Came here to post this.

I was waiting for that.

Pretty sure he changed it for the movie but he is a generous God. I'm sure it's good enough.
amirite?

i don't remember it verbatim but there's something about not boiling a kid (as in a young goat) in its' mother's milk?

De die autem illo vel hora nemo scit neque angeli in caelo neque Filius nisi Pater.

>forgot the last part
And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee.

It was good.

And Austin 3:16 says I just whipped your ass

>not properly quoting texts in either their original hebrew or latin translations

>The world ends
>google it
>Thinking there will still be a "Google" after the world ends

Fuck bitches get paid - Jesus Christ

...

Proverbs 11:27 look for good things you’ll find them, look for bad things they’ll find you.

Or you could like grab a bible

>1 Tim 2:12 διδάσkειν δὲ γυναιkὶ οὐk ἐπιτρέπω οὐδὲ αὐθεντεῖν ἀνδρός, ἀλλ᾿ εἶναι ἐν ἡσυξίᾳ

Clearly such law can only come from a holy source. Look at our godless society and despair. We have not upheld the request of our creator.

You cheeky cunt, mate, well done. As soon as I read that first line I immediately thought of the song and you delivered the rest of the verse, providing much needed closure

Thank you

...

Well yeah, I mean I've got one handy but how many other people on here do you think have a bible withing 100 feet of them?

This. Shortest verse in the bible.

Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour.

The only bible I own is in chingchong nipnong.

Can I just order crispy duck to get in?

Amen