Why haven't you pussies joined the Coast Guard yet?

Why haven't you pussies joined the Coast Guard yet?

because i don't like marijuana

Then join the Coast Guard and take it away form people

I have to fold my socks.

Semper Paratus! Server 6 years in the USCG

im also not a fag


Oh there are no fighter pilots in the Guard
Oh there are no fighter pilots in the Guard
Cuz they're all a bunch of fags
Smokin' marijuana bags
Oh there are no fighter pilots in the Guard

im a cs1.
eat shit

I can't swim.

Do you guys only recruit pussies? If so, you found the right fucking place.

Because I work on a tugboat earning a shit ton more money without *any* of the service bullshit.

Now come rescue my fat ass when I push my gmdss button, cuckbois

Cats Ass, Rats Ass, Dirty Old Twat
Sixty-nine Douchebags Tied In A Knot
Eat Suck, Bite Fuck
Gobble, Nibble, Chew
I'm The US Coast Guard
Who The Fuck Are You?

I don't live near water

I'm actually just kidding. USCG is the only service that actually does something for every day people working on and around the water. Keep it up, boyos

from petaluma?

neither could i when i joined. now i drive boats

Because I'm joining the USAF.

ah i see. you like being a pussy.

Have fun drowning bro.

bolivian

have fun not assisting one american life the entire time you are in the military.

Served 4 years active duty in the army and 4 in the reserve.

Because I joined to kill sand people.

So I joined the army.

cg's awesome. underappreciated. most useful service by far. thanks in advance for rescuing my drunk ass one day in the ocean.

yup

you were in another thread from a couple months ago.

surfin Sup Forums on watch, boys?

holyshit you're dumb. How did even get a 20+ on the AFQT?

Coast Guard Reserve 4 Lyfe. Just enlist faggot.

Because the Coast Guard is lame. They just maintain navigational aids and operate icebreakers.

Yea, i lurk lots

maintain your gf while you're in tents with boys.

Because I'm not a US citizen.

He didn't. He said he's joining the Air Force, not that he's in the Air Force. 1% chance he's actually accepted, and 0% chance he makes it through training.

Tell me one danger you will face while serving in the air force.

Unless you're infantry, I'm 100% positive I am more operational than you. And even if you are infantry, I am still willing to bet I'm more operational.

Holyshit brah read again. I responded to the Coast Guard guy.

And I took the AFQT, I got a 69. 50 is required for USAF.

ASVAD is going to be a breeze as well as basic. Get fucking real dude.

What else does the CG do? The Mounties handle all the law enforcement on the water and the RCAF does all the search and rescue.

> coast guard

Home of americas largest bitches. Every one of them is too much of a pussy to join a real armed forces branch, but thinks they're gods gift to earth because they're tough. Mix this with military goggles, and every guy further empowers them to a point that when they leave service, theyre quite literally a walking cunt.

A) I'm not American.
B) Served in Border Guard.

US Coast Guard. We handle law enforcement and search and rescue.

And I got an 88, and I'm in the Coast Guard. Of course Air Force Basic will be a breeze. It's made for pussies.

Why would I join the US Coast Guard if I'm in Canada?

You keep we're pussies. Did some Air Force Chad steal your girlfriend?

I worked with the Canadian Coast Guard out near California/Mexico. They were awesome. Those guys and gals know how to have a good time. Honestly, I wish the US Coast Guard was a lot more like theirs. If you want an amazing job, you should actually look in to joining the Canadian Coast Guard.

>Air Force
>Chad
>girlfriend

Pick one

Cause it's not a branch.

It literally is.

>Butthurt.exe

Obesity.

Because I'm smart enough to kill in academics and do any job I want so why the fuck would I do some stupid bullshit for low pay and be the pussies of the military right behind the chair force?

I'm studying medicine. If I wasn't doing that and I wasn't as smart as I am and I had to join the military in a combat role or potential combat role I would complete the SEAL training. Go big or go home if you're not smart enough to work higher level and the coast guard is a faggot group.

they are not DoD
if coasties are military
then so are the FBI, ATF, DEA, Secret Service, US Marshals, USPS, IRS, and INS are all branches of the military

Aet2 here.

DoD doesn't determine it. The law says it's part of the armed forces and even it didn't it's still a military organization.

too fat. 5 6 at 260lbs. basically need to cut my weight in half, that would take 2-3 years and I'm 22 now, so I'll be to old to join at 25

I did join though
Bm2, 8 years in, permanent cutterman and coxswain

This.

Mind you, fat men look spectacular in uniform. Look at this fine specimen for example