Celebrity Thread

Celebrity Thread

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Fuck. Typed this for the last Mckayla thread before it died. Whatever. Still relevant I guess.
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I've been here for too long and I'm too old now I guess. I've lurked and posted for 10 years, since I was in my 20s. Dispite or because of Sup Forums and Sup Forums I care more about people then ever.
When I hear she was molested starting at 13, and how there's over 100 cases against this man and that there were people who knew and it was systematically suppressed by MSU, I can't help but think of my young female relatives who are now older than she was and Nassar molesting them and everyone here getting off on it.
I get it. We see celeb threads, revenge threads, rate threads, rape, 10/10 x body part and loli and jailbait threads everyday. You get served up a trough of flesh and fantasy and you can pretend it magically appears before you. A gift from the gods / anons as a never ending stream of pics and vids.
It's easy to forget these are real people staring out at you from the screen. That your fantasies have no place in the real world and would cause tremendous suffering and anguish. That real people exist and it's not just images on a computer screen.
Empathy is in desperately short supply these days. Being able to put yourself in someone's position.
Sometimes I wonder how much of what makes up the inhuman front of Sup Forums is people knowingly acting out and how much are people, kids likely (or were kids here at one point), who see this behavior and think it's legitimate and take it to heart, thinking that is the true Sup Forums or whatever. How many radicals and hateful people have we churned out unknowingly?
I dunno. Old man rambling now. The real world shouldn't be like Sup Forums. I guess my confidence that people understand that has been shot.

>>Cameron Diaz
>>Anne Hathaway
>>Naomie Harris
>>Felicity Jones
>>Amanda Seyfried
>>Rose McGowan
>>Sienna Miller
>>Sharon Stone
>>Lindsay Lohan
>>Demi Moore
>>Vivica Fox
>>Catherine ZetaJones
>>Renée Zellweger
>>Julia Roberts
>>Naomi watts
>>Kate Hudson
>>Lucy Liu
>>Emma Thompson
>>Penélope Cruz
>>Alicia Keys
>>Michelle Williams
>>Julianne Moore
>>January Jones
>>Emmy Rossum
>>Diane Kruger
>>Jaime King
>>Este Haim
>>Gwen Stefani
>>Nicole Kidman
>>Uma Thurman
>>Sarah Jessica Parker
>>Marion Cotillard
>>Kate Beckinsale
>>Jennifer Lawrence
>>Rosario Dawson
>>Helena Bonham Carter
>>Heidi Klum
>>Rooney Mara
>>Jennifer Garner
>>Olivia Wilde
>>Busy Phillips
>>Kristen Wiig
>>Ashley Judd

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand mass shootings. The humor is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of bullet trajectories most of the rounds will go over a typical victim's head. There's also the shooter's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation - his personal philosophy draws heavily from Elliot Rodger's YouTube videos, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of the suspect, to realize that he's not just funny- he is saying something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike mass shootings truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in the shooter's existencial catchphrase "GOODNIGHT LAS VEGAS," which itself is a cryptic reference to The Flintstones in Viva Rock Vegas. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as the shooter's genius unfolds itself on their television screens. What fools... how I pity them. And yes by the way, I DO have a YOU CANT DODGE THE RODGE tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand

Just breathe air until the demons are gone
Just drink water until the demons are gone
Just dig earth until the demons are gone
Then we can burn fire forever
For the demons will have found their homeIoid wasn’t ready boys aren’t supposed to do that it bled so much plungers aren’t dildos
Children are sacred to the God
Stay woke at all times black sheep
>Resistance is futile
Never gonna give you up
DO NOT mutilate genitals
>This is not good. I hope you realize masturbating and fetishes are stifling to your overall health when indulged like this.
I am drinking dragonfruit mega c
>Celebrating the body form of women accepted
>Modifying body to resemble women for superficial reasons unacceptable
I would cluck her right in the chicken
>This is depiction of chocolates having sex
>I have fapped to worse
This is clearly an attack on our womens self esteem and privacy. I like it
Juxt use your fist
Poor penis enlargement victims
Wow r34 gets me hards
>i love roleplaying
Whatever is healthy
>get help suicides never am option
Get help we love you
I support trump
Love
Trust
The bad guys can’t beat us with those things

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Wew how did that happen with the fishstickz

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>Wew how did that happen
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Actually, it’s not a meme, kiddo. It’s an artistic protest movement and a simple, yet brilliant, joke all at the same time.
The average faggot who frequents Sup Forums these days sees Andy and his Log of Shit as an irritating form of spam. It is worth noting though that nobody really knows why these people find Logs as infuriating and triggering as they do.
Now on the rare occasion that someone with a shred of intelligence and maturity finds themselves on Sup Forums, they might see Andy and his Logs as a humorous mockery of the adoration some teenage scene girls show towards Andy Sixx. They joke is that they love him so much they would eat his shit, while most other people consider Andy Sixx a cringy z-list celebrity/ scene fag.
But both of these interpretations of the Log fall short of fully explaining it. There is a certain drive to proliferate the Log that logbois discover to be a powerful force. Some say it’s brought on by the overwhelming tide of porn and shit threads (FB/IG fap, Pics you shouldn’t share, loli, etc.) Others argue that Andy and his Log have taken on their own power altogether, and that logposters really don’t even have control over the impulse at this point. Others still have developed such a religious relationship with Andy and his Log of Shit that it is the only thing keeping them tied to this life.
So what does Andy’s Log mean? All you have to do is log in to find out.

...

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Young Sheldon. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer’s head. There’s also Sheldon’s nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realise that they’re not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike young Sheldon truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn’t appreciate, for instance, the humour in Sheldon’s existential catchphrase “Bazinga,” which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev’s Russian epic Fathers and Sons. I’m smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Chuck Lorre’s genius wit unfolds itself on their television screens. What fools.. how I pity them.
>And yes, by the way, i DO have a Young Sheldon tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It’s for the ladies’ eyes only- and even then they have to demonstrate that they’re within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand

What you don’t know right now is that Andy Sixx is the hottest, sexiest, gothiciest, hardcoreiest, deathcoreiest metal singer in the world and common sexual congress and foreplay would simply not do the job in trying to pleasure someone so divine, so perfect… so… holy, like his ass. Sure one could suck on his fucking dick and drink all of his sperms but it would never come close to showing your love and affection for him.
It starts with getting your foot in the door, which will not be easy. First you need to buy tickets for a Black Veil Brides concert and you must go to the actual concert hall, sneak past security and make your way to Andy’s dressing room. Much competition awaits you from other little BVB fangirls who want Andy’s Warm Log of Shit slidding down their fucking throats so badly. Some of them have killed others to make their chances of being where they are in the heat of the moment even possible, so do not take your presence or your life for granted.

...

he lives on Sup Forums in celeb threads its an open secret that everyone knows he has severe autism his name is herman (not even joking) when he has had brief clear days as he calls them he stated on here that he lives with his parents (he is like 60 something) and has split personalities and posts random celebs having circle jerking sessions etc even posts kid pics etc kenzi and G and jj and a few others....a janitor employed by the website called him out many times explaining to people that he basically samefags the entire thread talking to himself etc .... he thinks its just one guy and a big conspiracy against him etc ...cringy as fuck to watch....u usually can spot when he makes a thread when he posts a random celeb to start it off then posts a shity celeb ie taylor swift etc with a >best celeb next to it then proceeds to samefag the thread etc ....
>That moment that you realise that
>Marinafag =
>kenzifag
>munnfag
>arifag
>tayfag
>selenafag
>stutterfag
>katyfag
>pedofag
>footfag
>g-fag
>RPfag
>elle
>jordyn jones
>pedo gif poster guy
(plus when he acts like multiple anons getting mad at anyone who cals him out or anyone who posts this)
(plus the id suck cock for tay tay(or other celeb) faggotry/samefagging)
(plus underage celebs who he posts then samefags talking to himself saying how pure they are etc then replies to himself being "lewd" describing how he wants to fuck them then replying to himself again telling himself not to be lewd "she is an angel etc" then repeating the last few steps the entire thread)
aka herman the guy who lives with his parents in the united states
now thats what u call cringe...
just a head up to u guys its all the same guy...he samefags like a motherfucker using multiple devices
he is also a regular poster on Sup Forums and /mpl/ and starts most /trap/ threads

What I'm about to tell you is the truth, NASA has built a device, an artificial sun simulator and placed it in heliosykronus orbit outside Earth's atmosphere. NASA technology is very highly advanced and they are able to cloak (hide) are real solar sun. Are real sun is not white but more yellow in color. Because the sun is 93 million miles away, they are able to completely cover the real solar sun, the device also has lenses that bend light like a prism, but hear is how you can see the real solar sun and the fake sun.
1.) You will need (2) pairs of sunglasses.
UV sunglasses with the darker tint on the upper part of the lenses work excellent.
2.) While wearing one pair of sunglasses close one eye and look at the sun, hold the other pair of sunglasses 10 inches in front of the other pair. Slowly bring the the other pair closer closer to your eye like a telescope. You will see 2 suns. One will appear white, the fake sun, the other will be yellow, are real solar sun. They may appear a different color depending on the tinted color of your sunglass lense. If you do this technique correctly, you will see 2 suns. The solar sun and the fake sun.
This is the honest truth.
NASA explain !?
909762

HI I'M GEORGE ZIMMER THIS FLESHY FEATURE FORMERLY YOUR FIANCE FLOPS FASTENED TO MY PHALLUS CONDOM-LIKE FULLY ENGORGED FINISHED FINALLY A BURSTING BALLOON OF VISCERA SPEWING GULLET GLOOPING WHITE BILE UPON YOU WHILE MY MAMMOTH'S TUSK VENTRILOQUIZES HER MAW SOFTLY MOUTHING INTO YOUR EAR AT 03:34 AM OR ELSE YOUR MUMPH WILL CAPSIZE INTO THE ARCHES OF LITHUANIA:
"You're gonna like the way you look in the next 124 years, I guarantee it."

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Is this how you do it ~desu

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THAT FUCKING HEAD!!!!

...

There he is. There he goes again. Look, everyone! He posted it once again! Isn’t he just the funniest guy around?! Oh my God.
I can almost see your pathetic overweight frame glowing in the dark, lit by your computer screen which is the only source of light in your room, giggling like a like girl as you once again type your little Banana thread up and fill in the captcha. Or maybe you don’t even fill in the captcha. Maybe you’re such a disgusting NEET that you actually paid for a Sup Forums pass, so you just choose the picture. Oh, and we all know the picture. The “epic” Banana guy, isn’t it? I imagine you little shit laughing so hard as you click it that you drop your Doritos on the floor, but it’s ok, your mother will clean it up in the morning. Oh, that’s right. Did I fail to mention? You live with your mother. You are a fat fucking fuckup, she’s probably so sick of you already. So sick of having to do everything for you all goddamn day, every day, for a grown man who spends all his time on Sup Forums posting about a fucking banana. Just imagine this. She had you, and then she thought you were gonna be a scientist or an astronaut or something grand, and then you became a NEET. A pathetic Bananafag NEET. She probably cries herself to sleep everyday thinking about how bad it is and how she wishes she could just disappear. She can’t even try to talk with you because all you say is “I REALLY
REALLY LIKE THIS PICTURE.” You’ve become a parody of your own self. And that’s all you are. A sad little man laughing in the dark by himself as he prepares to indulge in the same old dance that he’s done a million times now. And that’s all you’ll ever be.

are you kidding me you little piece of shit i’ll have you know i graduated top of my politics class and i’ve been involved in privilege checking with over 150 confirmed political demonstrations i’m trained in conflict resolution and i was the most oppressed person in my entire upper middle class high school you are nothing to me but another cultural appropriator i will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which have never been seen on this side of the 49th parallel mark my words you think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the internet think again fucker, as we speak i’m checking with my anarcho-communist analyst brigade for your location so you better be prepared to deal with some molotov cocktails and angry feminists flying through your window yOU’RE FUCKING DEAD CHERRY i can be anywhere at any time and i can kill you in over seven hundred ways and that’s just with me boring you to death while i talk about privilege not only am i extensively trained in hotline management but i have access to an entire arsenal of sociological articles to prove my point and i will use them to wipe your fucking face off the earth you little shit if only you had known what oppressed retribution your cultural appropriation would unleash then maybe you would have held your fucking tongue but you couldn’t you’re fucking dead kiddo

...

...

...

How exactly does one get pussy while living at the white house as a teenage boy? The secret service always cock blocking you. when you're trying to run game on some foreign prime ministers daughter the news media catches you smiling at her and immediately blows shit out if proportion speculating that you are somehow breaking international law with your awkward teenage flirting, so you have to testify before congress that you didn't give away any top secret documents to her and are made to admit live on C-SPAN that you've never even kissed a girl . Then you get blue balls from some hot conservative girl winking at you and flashing her panties under her skirt and making sexy faces and blow job motions to you while you were going through some airport or public event, and when you passed by and shook her hand she leans in whispering she is going to diddle her clit thinking about you tonight and how much she wants to suck your dick off, just to fuck with you. Then you try to look up some porn when you get home just to relieve the tension but you just know the CIA is monitoring and 3 other govornment agencies are watching you beat off. Then you finally break down and Jack off in the shower which sets off some fucking biohazard drain alarm and the entire place is on lock down until they can find the source of the specimen and you end up getting debriefed by the joint chiefs of staff about your masturbatory habits and how you almost created a national security issue with your dick. Then wikileaks leaks your search history showing you looked up penis enlargement techniques when it was actually just some click bait you'd accidentally clicked and TYT spends all next week talking about your supposed micro penis. So you end up squirming a little since you are so wound up and being judged constantly and now people are saying you look like a fucking mental patient and you start to think you'll never get any pussy.

...

...

...

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Sonichu. The humor is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of autism most of the jokes will go over a typical readers head. There's also the writers nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation - his personal philosophy draws heavily from the writings of James Joyce, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of the writer, to realize that he's not just autistic- he is saying something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike Sonichu truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in Chris Chans existencial catchphrase "I HAVE MULTIPLE PAIRS OF DIRTY CRAPPED BRIEFS," which itself is a cryptic reference to Ulysses. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as the writers genius unfolds itself on their computer screens. What fools... how I pity them. And yes by the way, I DO have a Sonichu tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.

Anonymous quickly slid his copy of the D&D monster manual between his Algebra and bio books and closed his locker door. If he was to survive the afternoon he would have to move quickly. He pulled up his hood, trying to look inconspicuous, and turned around, only to come face to face with the flawless white tabard of the captain of the paladins.
"WHITHER GOEST THOU, KNAVE?!" he demanded, his voice loud despite the muffling of his visored greathelm.
"I was just getting my books, leave me alone." said Anonymous. He felt the hairs rising on the back of his neck; the armored bulk of the members of the Paladin squad blocked the hallway entirely.
"I POSTED AN EDICT BANNING YOU FROM THIS CORRIDOR, KNAVE!" The captain roared. His lieutenant looked up from his breviary and addressed no one in particular:
"METHINKS THE HERETIC LOOKS TO BE SMOTE!"
"NOoooo!" cried Anonymous, dodging away from the tightening circle of paladins. "Leave me alooone!" he yelled as he ran toward the stairway for all he was worth, the clanking of plates against chainmail close behind him.
"SMITE! SMITE! SMITE!" The cry echoed from the concrete walls.
'Somebody heeellllp!" he cried as the paladins lifted him bodily across the school courtyard. At their captain's encouragement they broke into a run.
"SMITE! SMITE! SMITE!" the paladins let anonymous go on the upswing, and for a brief second he was weightless, coasting through the air, until he landed with a squishy thud in the fetid darkness of the cafeteria dumpster.
"THY WILL BE DONE OH LORD," the paladins intoned as they slammed the lid.
Anonymous waited until their hymns of triumph faded in the distance before dragging himself clumsily out, shaking, stained and stinking. He felt he could burst into tears any second, but the varsity cheerwenches were there, giggling at his discomfiture

...

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noice. forgot she even existed tbh. still looking good

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Andy Sixx's log of shit. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of fecal matter most of the jokes will go over a typical viewers head. Theres also Andys fecal outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Josh Dryden literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realise that theyre not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike Andy Sixx's log of shit truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldnt appreciate, for instance, the humour in Andys existential catchphrase Creamy Steamy Dreamy which itself is a cryptic reference to Coprophilia. Im smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Josh Drydens genius wit unfolds itself on their computer screens. What fools.. how I pity them. XD
And yes, by the way, i DO have a Log of shit tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. Its for the ladies eyes only- and even then they have to demonstrate that theyre within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand. Nothin personal, kid

To be fair, you have to have a scat fetish to understand Andy Sixx's logs. The flavor is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of eating da poopoo, most of the logs will go over a typical eater's head. There’s also Andy's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his songs - his personal philosophy draws heavily from his dad Nikki, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these logs, to realize that they're not just tasty- their flavor says something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike eating logs of shit out of Andy Sixx's asshole truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the bouquet of his creamiest, steamiest dumplings, which themselves are a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Andy's logtrain unfolds itself into their gaping months. What fools... how I pity them. And yes by the way, I DO have a BVB tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for Andy's eyes only. And hopefully I can demonstrate to him just how dedicated I am too answer the question: "Would you?"

Nicole is hot as fuck

alright so im tryin to go home from the skatepark, take a shower and go up to river riot with some pplz, (river riot brings way to fuckin many people) and ive been in the same spot for almost a fuckin hour now. so im like fuck this shit and decide to drive down the emergency lane. lol right past the cops that are directing traffic. dude flags me down i slow down and wait till he gets close and just keep goin haha. fuck them they dont even fuckin know how to direct traffic so they aint gonna give me no fuckin ticket for drivin on the wrong part of the road and the faggot would of also gave me one for my subs just to be a dick. man he got so pissed when i smiled at him as i went by. he went and ran to his car but could go anywhere becase his car was on the other side of the cars. so i just cruzed like 6 miles down the emergency road to get home lol

Nata-Lee so pretty

I hole-hardedly agree, but allow me to play doubles advocate here for a moment. For all intensive purposes I think you are wrong. In an age where false morals are a diamond dozen, true virtues are a blessing in the skies. We often put our false morality on a petal stool like a bunch of pre-Madonnas, but you all seem to be taking something very valuable for granite. So I ask of you to mustard up all the strength you can because it is a doggy dog world out there. Although there is some merit to what you are saying it seems like you have a huge ship on your shoulder. In your argument you seem to throw everything in but the kids Nsync, and even though you are having a feel day with this I am here to bring you back into reality. I have a sick sense when it comes to these types of things. It is almost spooky, because I cannot turn a blonde eye to these glaring flaws in your rhetoric. I have zero taller ants when it comes to people spouting out hate in the name of moral righteousness. You just need to remember what comes around is all around, and when supply and command fails you will be the first to go. Make my words, when you get down to brass stacks it doesn't take rocket appliances to get two birds stoned at once. It's clear who makes the pants in this relationship, and sometimes you just have to swallow your prize and accept the facts. You might have to come to this conclusion through denial and error but I swear on my mother's mating name that when you put the petal to the medal you will pass with flying carpets like its a peach of cake.

pretty hot yeah

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? Ill have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and Ive been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and Im the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. Youre fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and thats just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little clever comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldnt, you didnt, and now youre paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. Youre fucking dead, kiddo.

nice

yissss

>be me
>single father
>daughter is in elementary school
>Let's call her Jill
>she signs up for the school spelling bee
>spend all week going over flash cards and practicing
>the big day arrives
>she's killing it
>most of the kids who entered are fucking retards
>one kid spells "catch" with a "k"
>I shout "get off the stage faggot"
>dirty looks from all the parents around me
>don't care my daughter's clearly gonna win
>it comes down to the last two kids
>the fat slut judge clears her throat
>"Jill, your word is 'six'"
>she spells it perfectly
>"S-I-X-X. Sixx"
>mfw the judge shakes her head no
>"I'm sorry, that's incorrect"
>other kid spells it with one fucking "x" and the judge grants him the point
>clenching my teeth so tight I break a crown
>literally shit my pants full I'm so angry
>other parents move away from me as it starts to smell like shit
>now the score is tied
>"Jill, your word is 'sliding'"