Literally just happened to me.
>be me
>Just got off of work at midnight
>missed my turn to go home
>shit.jpeg
>not from this town, just finishing off grad school
>get phone
>navigates me to intersection
>back on the street I need to be
>oh no
>gottapoop.ogg
>frantically searching for somewhere to poop
>Valero in the distance
>ah yee
>bastard is closed
>must hurry
>turn around
>see cars
>wrongway.html
>must turn
>quick left back onto my street
>cops
>shit shit SHIT
>pull into honda dealership
>officer asks if I'm drunk
>no, just have to go
>license and insurance
>cramps in my stomach by this point
>hold on there
>15 minutes later
>okay, we are citing you
>uncontrollable farts
>we need you to take a breathalyzer test to make sure you aren't drunk
>mfw
>take test
>passes
>can you please just give me my ticket and let me go
>officer at this point is probably just fucking with me until I blow
>I need you to sign here
>sign.sribble
>eventually lets me go
I made it home and took the mightiest shit in my life. Now I need to decide if I should plead innocent or guilty and just get this shit over with...
Literally just happened to me
I didn't see a wrong way sign. so maybe if I plead innocent, I will be let off.
You're welcome holy fuck my sides
Best bet.
>why didn't you pull over and find some patch of grass to shit in? It's midnight, nobody will seer you.
It was a busy highway
On top of that, there was no grass. It was in the main part of the city.
i would get a lawyer op, you might go to jail for wreckless driving
Nah, it was just a citation. I won't go to jail unless I don't show up in court.
what was the ticket for? reckless driving? do you have to go to court or can u just pay it? how is your driving record?
Go contest it if you're for real. If you don't go full autism in court the judge might buy a claim you were under duress from needing to shit and might let you off.
And you still can probably just do traffic school
I have 12 days. I am going to call tomorrow and see how much it is for
Do it anyway, it's still dark outside.
inb4 someone says fake
fake
What the fuck op, you should of shit your pants or on the cop to get out of the ticket you fucking ding dong
lol k
I still have dignity.
No you have a ticket
that is true
>no violation code
have the ticket nullified on this technicality
holy shit, thank you
This is why you should of shit all over the cop, being in Texas, all cops are secretly scat lovers, so he would of given you his gun and badge and let you of free, while he gets naked and rolls around in your shit. Or if you shit your pants he would of locked your pants and butthole spotless and occasionally sticking his tongue in your stinker hole. Then he would let you go. It's a win win user, you made the wrong choice here
*licked
No thumb print either.
Well, it may be my lucky day because there is no violation code.
in all reality it's highly unlikely it will be enough to get you off the hook, but it might be worth a try if all else fails.
I'll just see tomorrow. They open at 8:30 in the morning, so I will just call and see how much it is. If it is not too much, I will probably just go ahead and pay because I don't feel like going to court. I get paid friday anyways.
Also, fuck captcha. It has me identify the street signs.
Then go find the cop and take some laxatives and fiber bars before hand, you get a free gun, police badge, cleaned pants and cleaned asshole, and you don't have to pay for your ticket user, I wouldn't hurry up, there's only so little time to preform scat
imo it will be beneficial to fight it. just paying the fine will cost you much more in the long run with increased insurance rates
Great, now I just opened my bank account and my card has possibly been breached. Fml