Long term NEETs, how do you do it?

Long term NEETs, how do you do it?

I'm an aspiring NEET but I keep getting crap from my parents about it. I feel like too much of a NEET-lite.

So I was able to get a "gap year" between finish school and starting university. And I did nothing for that time, but even then my dad actually forced me to sign on for Job Seeker's Allowance. However, I eventually lost it because I didn't apply for jobs and my dad was mad but he got over it.

And then I went to university for three years which was the closest I got to being a NEET because I didn't go to any lectures or seminars. I should have applied for a masters to keep it going but I fucking didn't because I'm a moron so then I went back home this summer just been.

My dad wanted me to sign on and start looking for jobs. Nowhere was giving me any job offers and the interviews I went to just left me feeling shit. Then my dad told me to sign on but I pretended to sign on and figured I'd just walk around town instead of actually going to JSA.

JSA day: my mum says she's going out and won't be back until gone 11 (my appointment time). Decide I can wait a bit and then leave in my bike and have a nice cycle. My mum gets home early and sees I haven't gone so she offers to drive me in. Drives me in and I walk around the back to go to a nice park. My mum drives past to see me and I run away. She calls me and eventually I go back to the car.

We get home and my dad berates me for ages and tells me I need to get a job and that he's going to charge me rent. I want to work the smallest number of hours possible to cover rent, and he says if I do that he'll increase the rent... just to force me to work longer.

Says he wants me to have a career.

Eventually I decide I'll go into teaching. Because this way I can say I'm getting a career but the way it works means I won't even start training until next september. Dad's happy that I've got a career I want to go into.

But then just now on my way out of the lounge he stops me and says, "user, you won't be earning any money until next September. Are you ok with that?"

"Yes" I say

"Well I'm not." He says

I say nothing

"We'll see what happens with your application and if they can start you sooner."

My entire existence is basically just anxiety over my ever diminishing NEET-dom.

Does anyone have any good tips?

Where’s the independence in your life user? All the things you’ve done and said you’re going to do are based on your parents

It's not something they actively aspire to necessarily, it just happens that way.
You basically want to be a lazy bastard - like you see on those benefit programs. Think about that, you actually seek that life but without even having your own place.

Neets in 'merica are different, some of them have a room to live in that's bigger than a UK house. The culture there is different, Neets aren't really a thing here so much.
We have losers and benefit scum, not proper Neets like you see on the boards.

If nothing else, if you're at home for too long and are a full grown fucking man, people will think you're a weirdo and when people think you're a weirdo, they think you're a child molester.

Get your fucking head sorted lad.

Go seek professional help.
This sounds rather serious.

your a cuck OP, just die already and leave your poor folks alone

your fucking dad cant fuck your mom because your ass always home, fuck boy

Most of what I've ever done my entire life has been entirely about pleasing other people around me. I'm £30,000+ in debt because I went to university just to stop people bugging me and I didn't even go to any of the classes.

Did you get your degree?

thats because your a fucking retarded man-boy who can't do shit for himself and expects everything paid for in life until you die

boy are you in for a rough life

Yeah I feel like it's a lot harder to be a NEET in the UK. It's not that I like lacking a source of income. It's just envisioning getting that source of income seems very unattractive.

Yeah. International Relations from Durham.

It's not about pleasing people, you are lying to yourself. You're in debt becuase you took a degree course to be able to laze around your mum's house for a few extra years watching Jeremy Kyle and sitting around wanking and eating Wotsits. Don't kid yourself it was for them.
What you need, as I'm sure your dear old Dad agrees with, is a kick up the backside not advice on how to further this pathetic 'lifestyle'.

OK. I hear you. Maybe you're right.

Of course he's fucking right. Sort your shit out lad, at the moment you're a waste of good air and have no use at all to humanity. Where abouts in the UK are you?

Milton Keynes

Plenty of folk commute from there to London. Which opens up a massive job market for you

This.

Come on dude, you are better than this. You have potential, You have life. Build something, think something, share knowledge. Teach.

'I want to live in my parents house, in my childhood bedroom, alone, and never leave Milton Keynes unless it's to tag along on holiday to Cornwall with my Mum and Dad'

Is this REALLY the life story of you? No.

Contact your university or a carrers place, tell them you have this degree that you no doubt barely scraped through, ask them what to do next.
That is the start. Do it tomorrow, not on Monday, tomorrow morning.

This
I'm currently a NEET and it's not a healthy life

Mate, look who your asking. We're a load of various dudes, amongst us are degenerates, perverts, fuckwits and borderline retards and yet even to us you are a shambles. Let this be your wake up call.

I'm really bad at getting jobs because I'm not very good at faking enthusiasm.

I could try emailing my university... don't know what I'd say really.

*you're

In principle I'm actually in the middle of therapy but we had to reschedule my first appointment and they haven't contacted me since.

Then find something you are enthusiastic about, it's not as if high wages are a neccessity at the moment.
Make sure you don't have a proper problem like depression, but don't start thinking you do and using that as an excuse. The first time you say it, go to the doctors and confirm it or never use it as an excuse again.

my parents are too nice to call me out on it. my dad is 100x more willing to call me out on my bullshit than my mom, and yet i'm living with him for free and he basically says nothing. As far as I can tell, it's more about getting lucky, having people in your life who will support you without being niggers about it. Good luck in your laziness endeavors, friend.

My dad told me to find something I'm enthusiastic about. It went like this:

Dad: What are you enthusiastic about.
Me: Says thing.
Dad: Can you think of a way to earn money off that?
Me: No.
Dad: OK. So that's no good then.

It was a bit cyclical but not that long of a conversation considering I'm only enthusiastic about approximately three things at a stretch.

Yeah that does seem to be the case. People like you have won the lottery. Problem with me is even if my parents were cool with it I'd still have other relatives too. It's a nightmare.

My advice is to do the stuff for yourself man.
Don't consider at all what your parents want or don't want you to do, don't let that affect you in any way.

Think about what you really want to do and what will make you feel fulfilled in your life.
I can tell you personally, I wasted fucking years being a recluse in my room, watching my youth rotting away - I mean well over a decade.
It wasn't intentional at first, my life fucked up and crashed, I shut myself in, and then was shut in for so long I didn't know what to do and couldn't bear to face the outside world. I hated it.

But I kept myself there, by overthinking - and not doing.
In reality, doing any job and earning some money just so I was out on my own and living, progressing - that is what was better.
Being out in the world, having my own space, my own cash and my own reality that I make day by day is just a completely different experience.

The trick is, to stop worrying and stop thinking so much, and just try some things.
If you don't like it after six months or a year, you change the job, or you do something different.
Stop feeling it is up to your parents to tell you what to do. They are out of the picture, you are old enough to bring yourself up now.

Search for the site "the art of manliness", some of the articles on there are alright for pointing yourself in the right direction. Not all of them though, have a look through - and apply whatever seems like a good idea.

I reckon you should do some internet research on what kind of jobs you can start out in with your degree.
If you have no clue at all, do either a master with a grant, or take a shorter course, maybe even a trade skill - carpentry, plumbing, electrician.
Also, obtain a driving license if you haven't done so yet - it opens up a lot of opportunities.

Think of how you can make yourself useful to other people, and make it happen. It should be a regular thing.

Being neet might sound comfortable and easy, but in reality you are wrecking your life and making your later years all the harder.

Imagine if you leave it 10 years.
You'll find everyone else has 10 years of savings, 10 years of experience, 10 years of training and qualifications, 10 years of practice socialising, 10 years of practice in relationships, 10 years of building confidence by doing difficult and new things.

It simply isn't worth it, and I wholly regret ever wasting my years like that.
It is easy to sink down into it, but the real answer is that life is a fight - and you should fight constantly. Because then you become a good fighter, and your life becomes better.

Tell us what the three things that you like doing are.

The two important questions are:
1. what do you like doing
2. what are you good at

Also, remember - and this is very important, you do not have to find out what you want to do for the rest of your life first try.
It is better to try something for a year, and see if you are good at it, see if you like it, see if you can progress further at it.
Then change it.
You can always change what you are doing, and sometimes by doing two things that didn't quite fit, it can lead you into something else which fits just right.

Contact them.
Don't wait around for the world.

Be proactive, force yourself to be. You'll begin to feel in control of your life and things will happen a lot faster, and in a way that is better for you.
Phone them up tomorrow morning, be polite and ask for a new appointment as soon as possible.

If you tell me what you like doing and what you are good at, I can offer some suggestions of what to try first.

I like to read a lot.

That's basically it.

I wake up at 7, blitz some frozen berries, banana, 50 ml of apple juice, water, and soaked oats. Then I take my smoothie upstairs and read. Today I read:

Understanding Sex and Relationship Education, Youth and Class: A Youth Work-Led Approach by Sharon Elley

Gender Equality , Intersectionality , and Diversity in Europe by Lise Rolandsen Agustín

and Black Genders and Sexualities Edited by Shaka McGlotten and Dána-Ain Davis

For lunch I have brown rice, curry paste, quorn chicken and peas. I also have a lot of green tea.

Any ideas?

Get a fucking job you moron.
All you do is sit around, wank and listen to your parents moan. You need to get off your fucking arse, loose some weight and get a fucking job. Pathetic how you can do this your whole life, do you want to be on Jeremy Kyle?

I was a neet for 6 months and it was horrible.

Fuckin hell
I bet u sit around all day eating whole jars of Dolmio and tubes of tomato puree. You piss in bottles and do tributes over Karen Gillian, and after all that you order condoms to peoples houses.
Get a sodding job.